


With You, Went None of Me

by Rebelguitargirl2015



Category: The 100 (TV), clexa fandom
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, CEO! Clarke, Clarke is a little annoying at first, Clarke is sitting on a very high horse and Lexa knocks her right off, Clarke loses her wits, F/F, F/M, Falling In Love, Friends to Lovers, G!p Lexa, Jennifer! The wedding planner, Minor mentions of Costia, Mother! Lexa, One Night Stand, Rich! Clarke, Self-Discovery, Set in Alabama, Smut, Some cheating occurs, Tattoo artist! Lexa, Tattoos, Wedding Plans
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-08
Updated: 2018-06-04
Packaged: 2018-10-29 15:04:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 20
Words: 95,212
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10856460
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rebelguitargirl2015/pseuds/Rebelguitargirl2015
Summary: Lexa was everything Clarke shouldn't want. She was getting married in a couple of months, she shouldn't even be looking her direction. But she wanted a tattoo, her first tattoo and she was immediately drawn to the tattoo artist. Her mother would have a cow and the whole farm if she knew Clarke was having doubts about calling off the wedding. Finn was rich, smart and handsome but Lexa was so much more.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> As always, tell me your thoughts. I really enjoyed writing this so I hope you like it (:
> 
> Follow my Tumblr- rebelguitargirl, if you have any questions or if you want to yell at me about when I'm updating. Literally, don't be shy to ask any questions because you won't be bothering me.
> 
> Thank you to my beta, mmeister911!!

Clarke watched as the minute hand ticked on the clock. She wanted to make the most of her session with Jennifer, her wedding planner. She had blonde hair and blue eyes just like her. Clarke was finally going to get married and she was aware she was acting like a crazy person but everything had to be perfect for the big day. Clarke was excited to get married, as she felt like she finally found that person she wanted to love forever.

 

Clarke loves Finn, she does, but she loved planning for her wedding more. She cared about what flowers she wanted at each table. She cared about all the little decorations and the big, fancy decorations around the room. She cared about who sat where and she knows Finn just asked her to marry him a couple of weeks ago, but she was crazy and wanted it all to be perfect.

  
Clarke saw a flaw in the table arrangements- Jennifer said something along the lines of: _we don't need to focus on the table arrangements now. You still haven't decided what flowers you wanted._ There were so many flower options, Clarke couldn't choose. She had to have the right ones or the wedding would be ruined.

  
Clarke's eyes widened when she saw what Jennifer did with the seating arrangements.

  
"No, Jennifer. My aunt Janice and Sherry can't sit together, because they will fight the whole time." Clarke said as she moved the table piece.

  
"Clarke," Jennifer drawled out annoyed. "As your wedding planner we have months to figure out who's sitting where. Let's focus on the type of flowers you would like.."

  
Clarke sighed and obeyed. There were a variety of options from Amaryllis to Tulips to Carnations. Clarke didn't know which ones she wanted, but she still continued to look through the book with Jennifer.

  
Clarke was Chief Executive Officer of Skai Corporations, a major healthcare organization. She had made a name for herself and had people who respected her. Clarke liked to think she was one of those classy business women she saw on her primetime TV shows. She was classed as a dumb blonde in school, but she made it and she wanted to laugh in everyone’s face, who thought she wouldn't succeed. She was content with her life. Finn was a wonderful man who worked for a Real Estate Company. Clarke was excited and couldn’t wait to get married. She just needed to get through all the wedding planning first.

  
Her mom, Abby, came to the first planning session, which was last week. They were bombarded with so many questions that they really didn't get that far in the process. However, Clarke was still looking forward to planning her wedding over the next couple of months.

* * *

 

  
Clarke was lounging around her house with her two best friends, Raven and Harper. It was Friday night and Finn was out with some of his friends. Clarke was sipping on red wine as they chatted. Clarke's three carat diamond ring was sparkling every time she brought her glass up to drink and she couldn’t help but stare at it.

  
Clarke laughed elegantly with her two friends as they discussed the hassle and workload of their jobs. Raven was a very well known mechanic, who ran her own shop called Sky Mechanic while Harper worked for a law firm called Mountain Corporations. It wasn't long before the conversation focused on her engagement.

 

"Isn't there always something you wanted to do before you get married?" Raven asked, which had Clarke shrugging. She's done some pretty wild things in her life, but now she was twenty-four years old, she didn't know what else there was to do. She was getting married and that was the biggest thing on her list.

 

It was so cliché, but she wanted to go to Paris and she had always admired tattoos. She didn't think she would ever get one. She found it was a huge commitment and what if she woke up one day and didn't want it anymore? Clarke wasn't going to go through the pain of getting the tattoo and then getting it removed. She knows it used to be a big thing on her list. She kept putting it on the back burner because she didn't think she could actually go through with it.

  
"A tattoo,” Clarke said fondly as she stared down at her wine glass. "That's something I could do before I get married."

  
"That's it? I thought it would be the strip club or something." Harper teased and Clarke gave her a tiny smile.

  
"I've always wanted one. Why not?" Clarke shrugged. She didn't know if she was trying to humor her friends or if she really wanted to do this. If she did, she knew there was no turning back.

  
"Jennifer tells me things. We are about a month into your engagement and you can't even pick out flowers, yet you want a tattoo?" Raven cried. Clarke chuckled a bit at her antics. Raven was always one for the dramatics.

  
"I think it would be something I would want to do before I get married." Clarke answered and Harper nodded in understanding.

  
"There's a tattoo shop not too far from here, I forget the name. I think it might be called Nightblood Ink or something like that." Harper supplied.

  
"Thanks, Harp. I mean, I might. I'm not going to talk to Finn about it until I'm completely sure." Clarke informed her two best friends.

  
"This is exciting. I can't wait to see if you actually go through with it." Raven smiled and Clarke smiled back.

  
She hoped she could.

 

* * *

  
Clarke found herself moseying along the streets trying to find the tattoo shop. She was in the right shopping center, so it had to be close. Down in Birmingham, Alabama, there were only so many shopping plazas.

 

It was nice hot day in the middle of June and Clarke was wearing a knee-length, cream white dress. She was thinking of her wedding and She didn't want it to be in the summer. Clarke was thinking about having an outdoor wedding, which wouldn’t be able to happen with the humidity of the summer weather. It would be way too hot and Clarke knows she would sweat and didn’t want that on her wedding day.

  
Clarke sighed in relief as she finally stumbled upon the tattoo shop, NightBlood Ink. _Harper was right_ , she thought. It was a nice little shop that sat on the corner of the shopping plaza. Clarke could see a few people inside. She had just gotten off work and Clarke was curious to see exactly how this all worked.

  
Clarke took a deep breath. Could she really do this? Mark her body forever? She hasn't even talked to her mom or Finn about it. This was a big moment for her, but before she could overthink it, she started walking. She listened to the sound of her heels that usually demanded attention when at work and with her head held high, walked inside.

  
Clarke had to wait a few moments before anyone addressed her, as everyone seemed to be in their own little world. Clarke could see why, there were a lot of things happening all around her. Clarke liked the splattered black and white floor. She didn't think she would, but she was drawn to them. 

  
"Well, hey there, sweetheart." A brunette haired woman drawled out in a southern accent. Clarke still looked around the tattoo shop amazed. She felt extremely out of place here with her dress on.

  
"Hi, my name is Clarke and I would like a tattoo." Clarke announced, much like how she talked to her employees, but Clarke wished she would have brought Raven and Harper with her.

  
Clarke looked up and she was taken back by how pretty the girl was in front of her. She was watching her with expectant eyes and Clarke felt like they were piercing through her soul. They were so bright and green like the leaves of the many plants she has around her house. Her hair was slicked up into a messy bun and she was wearing a red and black checkered flannel shirt. She had a black tank top underneath it and she looked young, about her age. She had a jaw line, Clarke would never admit that she would kill for. Clarke was completely taken back when the girl started giggling.

  
"That's not quite how this works," The girl started. "My name is Lexa Woods and I'm the owner. I don't do walk-ins, None of my employees do. You have to schedule an appointment." Lexa said simply, which made Clarke nod dumbly.

  
She was used to being in charge of situations though, so she fought back, trying to get her way.

  
"Couldn't you make an exception? I'm already thinking of backing out as we speak." Clarke said, as she batted her eyelashes. Lexa looked at her like she’s heard all this before, which she had many times.

  
"Do you even know what you want?" She asked in a monotone and Clarke stilled, because she didn’t have a clue.

  
"No," She replied which had Lexa making an annoyed sound. "But I'm sure I can think of something."

  
"For someone who is having doubts. Last minute decisions never do me or you any good. I bet I'll be removing it in a week tops." Clarke listened to Lexa's soothing southern voice and huffed.

  
"Could I look around and see what you have to offer?"

  
That seemed to make Lexa smile and she nodded, "We have a whole room dedicated to ideas. Come on." Clarke was forced to follow Lexa because she was already halfway to the back.

  
Clarke stepped into the room cautiously as if she were afraid she might break something. Clarke just might, because she was nervous and her hands were itching to do something.

  
"Some ideas are on the wall. These books on the shelf are full of ideas. I can personally tell you a few.." Lexa trailed off as she handed Clarke a book.

  
It was thick and Clarke looked at Lexa before she opened it. Lexa gave her an encouraging nod before Clarke held her breath and opened the book. There were tattoo ideas that she wasn't even thinking of just on the first page alone.

  
A starfish, jellyfish, flowers, hearts and was that a lion? Clarke was stunned into silence as she looked through the book. Lexa stood awfully close to her, watching her. Clarke smirked because she smelt sweet like strawberries.

  
"See any ones you like?" Lexa asked and Clarke shook her head.

  
"I'm still looking through." Clarke responded. They were interrupted by a man sticking his head through the door.

 

"Sorry to interrupt. Gracie is here, Charlotte just dropped her off." A very tall man with tattoos running up his arms and neck said as he walked through the door.

  
"Alright. I'll be out in a minute. Give her my love, please Lincoln." Lexa said. Clarke watched the scene very confused.

  
"She's crying." The man said with a grimace and Clarke heard Lexa huff.

  
"Can you have Octavia get her?" Lexa asked and Lincoln shook his head.

  
"She clocked out already." The man said again.

  
"Alright, alright. Send her back here."

  
The man, Lincoln, was gone in a flash. Clarke didn't need to see whoever Gracie was to know she was crying. She could her the girl wailing from the front of the shop. Lexa prepared for whoever Gracie was. Clarke figured that she was a little girl.

  
Lincoln walked through the door with a crying little girl on his hip. She had curly brown hair and she had fairly light skin. But anyone could tell she was mixed. Her eyes were big, brown and sad.

  
Lexa immediately reached her hands out for the girl. Gracie instantly leaned over to her.

  
"Hey, what's wrong, sweetie? It's okay, mama's got you."

 

Clarke watched the scene in front of her awkwardly. She wasn't sure if she should interrupt the moment or not. She shifted her weight from leg to leg waiting impatiently. She swears she was standing there for a good five minutes just listening to the little girl cry. She finally had enough.

 

"So, are we going to plan this tattoo or..?" Clarke trailed off as she cleared her throat. Clarke swears Lexa just glared at her like she couldn’t believe her.

  
"Can I console my daughter first?" Lexa sneered making Clarke's eyes widen a bit. She had never thought much about kids. In fact, her and Finn had a talk that they never wanted any. Clarke's been around children before, but goes out of her way to not surround herself with them.

  
Clarke huffed, but she stayed silent as Lincoln silently left the room. Gracie was still crying with her face buried in her mother's shoulder.

  
"Do you want to stay with me?" Lexa asked into her hair and the girl nodded.

  
"Okay. Mommy has some business to take care of, so can you sit on the couch please?" Lexa asked in a sweet voice and the little girl nodded again. Lexa gently lowered her to the ground. Clarke guessed that she couldn't have been more than two or three. She hopped up on the couch, but she kept her eyes on her mother the entire time.

  
"I'm sorry. Where were we?" Lexa looked like she was trying to focus on Clarke, but was failing miserably. She kept looking back to make sure her daughter was safe. Clarke frowned a bit. She couldn't imagine having that lifestyle.

 

"When should I come back to schedule an appointment." Clarke said slowly which made Lexa jump back into job mode.

  
"Right. Just give me a call and we can schedule this appointment of yours. Did you figure out what you wanted?" Lexa asked and Clarke couldn't help but notice how soothing her voice sounded. It was soft, but loud enough that Clarke could hear her. Clarke wasn't sure what she wanted and honestly didn’t know why she was here.

  
Maybe this was a sign?

  
"Um.. no. I don't know yet, but I'm sure I'll figure it out before I call you." Clarke found herself saying. She should've just said no in the first place. 

  
"Alright. Sounds like a plan." Lexa said as she inched back over to her daughter. Clarke looked away as Lexa picked her up and the girl buried herself in her mother again.

  
"Alright, well. Thank you for your time." Clarke muttered and looked over to Lexa. She was gently swaying her daughter back and forth.

  
"Yeah, of course. Call me whenever, sweetheart." Lexa said smoothly and Clarke nodded dumbly. Lexa's hospitality was a little too much, but Clarke didn't say anything.

 

"She's adorable." The second that came out of Clarke's mouth, she wanted to take it back. Kids weren't her thing at all. They were like little monsters always running around and getting into things. Clarke couldn't take it back though, not after looking the little girl in her eyes. They were so big that Clarke found herself so mesmerized that she couldn't look away. Gracie was staring at her oddly, but Clarke for once, didn't mind.

  
"Thank you." Clarke watched Lexa before she smiled wide and Clarke found herself smiling too, before she snapped out of it.

  
"Alright, well. I'll give you that call. Bye, Gracie." Clarke said sweetly. What the hell was wrong with her? She wanted to be polite, but a part of her actually wanted to say goodbye to the little girl.

  
"Can you say bye, sweet pea?" Lexa asked her daughter and the little girl nodded, but she didn't remove her head from her mom's shoulder.

  
"Bye." The little girl said quietly and Clarke nodded. Lexa gave her a sheepish smile and Clarke waved her off.

  
"Bye, Clarke." Lexa said and Clarke was drawn to her voice just like she was drawn to the little girl's eyes.

  
"Bye, Lexa. Hopefully I'll see you soon." Clarke said as she finally left the room, hearing Lexa hum in agreement before she finally left the tattoo shop.

  
What on earth was she thinking? Clarke didn't know if this was a good idea or not. She knew only a couple of people at her job that had tattoos. Could she really go through with this? She knows she's thinking way too much about this, but this was huge for her. She wouldn't be able to take this back and she wanted something sacred on her body. 

 

Clarke shook her head. She was going to do this. She was going to find a tattoo, maybe she could call Lexa and they could discuss some of the possibilities before she scheduled the appointment. Clarke smiled triumphantly as she walked to her car. Clarke Griffin never backed down from anything and she was finally going to check something off her wish list. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for the support on the first chapter! This story is heavily revolved around tattoos and the idea of them. The tattoo that Clarke eventually gets, serves as a very important aspect of this story. There's a couple reasons why and I'm sure you guys can probably work them out. 
> 
> I hope you enjoy!

Clarke waited until her fiancé was out playing tennis with his friends before she called Lexa. It was a late afternoon on a Saturday so she figured it would be a good time to call her.

  
Clarke had to wait a couple rings before Lexa picked up.

  
"Hello? Who's this?" Clarke smirked because Lexa sounded so confused.

  
"Clarke," She said simply and the line went silent. "The girl in the white dress that came by two days ago."

  
"Oh, right! Hey, sweetheart."

  
"Hi," Clarke greeted. "I was just thinking, I might be up for my tattoo if you can schedule me."

  
"Oh, yeah? When were you thinking of doing it?" Lexa asked. Clarke shrugged, before she realized Lexa couldn't see her.

  
"Maybe next weekend?" Clarke suggested.

  
"Okay, that could work,” Lexa replied. "Oh, wait, hang on. My daughter is crying." Lexa said softly into the phone making Clarke frown.

  
"Can't your husband get her?" Clarke asked confused. Lexa made a noise over the phone, like she was choking on water.

  
"I don't have a husband." That was all Lexa said before the line went quiet again. Clarke assumed Lexa walked away from her and was tending to her daughter.

  
Clarke contemplated hanging up, as it was clear Lexa was busy. She didn't want to intrude on the girl, but Clarke decided to continue waiting on the line. If it was Raven or Harper, she definitely would have hung up by now.

  
"Sorry about that," Lexa's voice sounded through the phone making Clarke jump. She was glad she was sitting at her dinner table. "She's up from her nap and wanted some milk." Lexa explained. Clarke nodded, not as if she cared.

  
"So, you think of any ideas?" Lexa asked.

  
"Yes," Clarke said as she got more comfortable in the chair. She crossed her legs since she was wearing a dress. "Branches." She stated.

  
"Like tree branches?" Lexa asked. Clarke hummed.

  
"Just like that. You think you could do it?" Clarke asked with a challenging tone and was surprised when she heard Lexa snort through the line.

  
"I could do that in my sleep, sweetheart," Lexa said evenly. "That's a nice idea. What prompted it?" Lexa asked.

  
Clarke, for the life of her, couldn't figure out why she wanted these branches? Why did she wanted to mark herself with them? But she had her mind made up and it was exactly what she wanted. She knew her mother and Finn would think she was crazy, but it was her life and her decision. She wanted this and she didn't want to back out.  

 

"I don't know. I like the idea, I guess." Clarke answered lamely. She couldn't think of why she wanted them. They signified life in a way and Clarke wanted something refreshing on her body. She's never been an outdoorsy kind of gal, but she liked looking at the trees. And trees signified life. She wouldn't mind looking at tree branches on herself everyday.

  
"Where do you want it?" Lexa asked. Clarke hadn't thought that far ahead.

  
"Maybe on my shoulder blade or my forearm. I'm not sure." Clarke answered back indecisively.

  
"Okay, well. The most important thing is that you know what you want," Lexa said seriously. "I'm totally free next weekend to make it happen. I don't work on Sunday's though. I'm not working today either because I have no one to watch my daughter.” Lexa explained and waited for a sound of acknowledgement from Clarke. Clarke gave Lexa a soft hum before she continued. 

 

"Okay, so next Saturday you can come in and we will design the tattoo how you want it. You'll have a follow up on Monday or any day of your choosing to get it or we can do it all in one sitting. I figured you would want to wait." Lexa said which Clarke agreed too.

  
"That's fine. I'd like to see what it potentially will look like so that works for me." Clarke responded.

  
"Alright, sounds good, sweetheart. I'll see you next Saturday." Lexa said.

  
"Bye, Lexa."

  
Clarke was sure she would never get used to Lexa calling her sweetheart, but she found that she was surprisingly okay with it. Clarke hung up the phone excited, because she was finally going to get a tattoo.

* * *

  
Clarke broke the news that night to her parents and fiancé, gently. They were at their house eating dinner so Clarke thought it would be a good time to tell them.

  
"I have some news." Clarke said as she wiped her mouth with her napkin respectfully as all eyes were on her.

  
"What's that, sweetie?" Finn asked as he cut into his steak. Clarke's heart was pounding and her hands were sweaty. She couldn't hold onto anything because she was sure it would just slip out of her hands.

  
"I'm getting a tattoo." Clarke announced. Finn dropped his cutlery as her parents dropped their jaws.

  
"Oh honey, you can't be serious." Finn rushed out, but Clarke just nodded.

  
"Why would you want that?" Abby asked confused. "It's trashy."

  
Clarke felt herself getting a little angry. She didn't think it was trashy. Lexa had beautiful tattoos and so did the tall man, Lincoln.

  
"I'm getting this with or without your support. I already have an appointment scheduled to go over the design." Clarke said determined while her mom sighed.

  
"I think it's a great idea." Jake beamed and Abby elbowed him.

  
"What? It is." Jake said sheepishly.

  
"It's a terrible idea to mark your body forever." Finn said and Clarke tried not to roll her eyes at him.

  
"There's nothing you can say to stop me."

  
"What are you even going to get?" Her mother asked.

  
"Tree branches."

  
Finn dropped his cutlery again as her mother snorted out a laugh. Her dad just smiled through it all.

  
"Tree branches? You're doing all this for some tree branches?" Abby cried. Clarke rolled her eyes this time.

  
"Yes, mom. I'm getting this tattoo." Clarke had already grown very fond of the idea and it's only been a couple of hours since she came up with it. She would go in and see Lexa in a week. She couldn't wait to see what the design would look like.

  
"If she wants tree branches on her body then I say she should do it." Jake spoke up. Clarke smiled over to her dad. She was such a daddy's girl.

  
Her mother huffed and so did Finn. That was the end of the conversation and it wasn't spoken about for the rest of the night.

* * *

  
Even though, Finn and her mother opposed it, Clarke found herself walking down the street confidently heading to Nightblood Ink. Lexa immediately greeted her and ushered her to the back. Lincoln waved at her and Clarke smiled politely at him. He was talking to a short brunette in the corner of the shop.

  
"Alright, just have a seat." Clarke walked in and immediately knew they were in her office. Clarke wondered if Lexa brought all her clients back here. Clarke didn't question it and closed the door before sitting down.

  
"So, you found someone to watch Gracie?" Clarke asked as she looked at Lexa. The brunette was pulling out her drawing pad and the question caught her off guard before she looked up at her. Lexa was giving her a weird look, but answered the question nevertheless.

  
"Yes, her grandparents. They will drop her off later tonight." Lexa said as she moved some papers around on her desk to make room for her sketch pad.

  
"Should I just be quiet or..?" Clarke asked. Lexa nodded slightly.

  
"I just need quiet for a few minutes. It won't take long for me to sketch it out." Lexa explained.

 

Clarke nodded. She stayed quiet and looked around Lexa's office. There was a picture of a girl about their age and it wasn't hard for Clarke to piece together that the woman had to be related to Gracie. Gracie looked just like Lexa, but there was no mistaking that this woman was Gracie's other mother. That meant that Lexa was into girls as she had to have some type of relationship with the girl in the picture.  

 

Clarke decided to hold her tongue and not mention her observation while she watched Lexa work. She was wearing a blue flannel shirt today with her hair back in a ponytail.

  
"She's beautiful." Clarke finally whispered out as she stared at the woman in the picture. Lexa was finishing up the sketch when she looked up. She swallowed hard as she looked at the picture.

  
"Yeah, she is." Lexa said sadly.

  
"Is she your wife?" Clarke assumed as much. She thought it would be a little creepy if Lexa wasn't married to the girl.

  
"Yes. She was." Clarke furrowed her eyebrows and was going to question it, but noticed Lexa's mood change completely. Normally, if it was any other person she probably would have asked, but Lexa looked so sad. Instead, she thought it was best to leave it alone. 

 

Lexa cleared her throat before turning the sketch around, "Here's what it would roughly look like."

  
Clarke stared at it amazed. She was truly taken back. She was very impressed. It was a small tree trunk with branches and two little birds off to the side. It was beautiful and was exactly what Clarke had been imagining.

  
"I can make it bigger if you want." It was a pretty small sketch, but it was big enough for Clarke. It was pretty spaced out and Clarke loved it already.

"No, I love it. It's amazing." Clarke praised making Lexa smile.

  
"Well, thank you," Lexa said. "You just want it all in black right?"

  
Clarke hummed and nodded, "Yes, I think it looks better."

  
"Me too," Lexa agreed. "If you really want this, I have some openings next weekend if you are available. We don't have to do this today.”

  
"I would have to see what my fiancé is doing, but I'm sure that should be fine. I'm not quite ready today.” Clarke said. Lexa looked taken back.

  
"Fiancé? You're getting married?" Lexa asked in disbelief. Clarke didn't know how Lexa missed the ring on her finger.

  
"Yes," Clarke said as she held out her hand, showing off her ring. "I'm getting married in October."

  
Lexa looked at the diamond ring with a frown on her face before she looked up at Clarke with a smile.

  
"That's exciting."

  
"I know I shouldn't pry," Clarke started out slowly. "How was your wedding day?"

  
Clarke watched as Lexa seemed to be deep in thought. There were lines etched across her face and she was sporting a frown. Clarke immediately wanted to take back her question, but stayed quiet, waiting for Lexa to speak.

  
"Magical," Lexa breathed. "We had a chocolate fountain and it was amazing. Absolutely breathtaking." Lexa said with a faraway smile. Clarke found herself smiling too, until Lexa's smile faded.

  
"I hope yours is just as good." Lexa said after a minute before she closed her sketch book.

  
"I'm trying. My fiancé and my mom don't want me to get a tattoo.” Clarke said and Lexa frowned.

 

“Why?” Lexa asked and Clarke shrugged.

 

“They think it's bad to mark my body. I've always wanted to do this and I had my doubts, but this is amazing.” Clarke said as she motioned towards the sketch.

 

“I'm sorry they think that. As a tattoo artist, I don't see them as trashy. People should have a right to express themselves through body art.”

 

Clarke thought she would've agreed with them, but they weren't trashy at all. They were beautiful. Lexa was right. People should be able to mark their bodies with art if they wanted, because there was nothing wrong with it.

 

Lexa put away her sketch pad and Clarke took this as her cue to get up and waited for Lexa to do the same.

  
"Thank you for this. You really are talented." Clarke said with a tiny smile.

  
"Thank you. I'll be seeing you next weekend, sweetheart." Lexa said humbly. Clarke smiled again. She was disgusted, she never smiled this much in a stranger’s company.

 

"You're welcome. Yeah, I'll see you on Saturday." Clarke said as Lexa walked her to the door.

  
Lincoln and the brunette haired girl waved at her and Clarke found herself waving back, she couldn't help it. They were friendly.

  
Clarke walked out of the tattoo shop overjoyed because she was finally getting a tattoo that she had wanted for a long time. Even though her family was opposed, Clarke didn't care. She was hesitant at first herself, but after seeing the design, she knew it was the right decision. The sketch looked amazing and Clarke was already counting down the days until she could get her tattoo and see Lexa again.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know if I made this clear or not, but this will be a g!p Lexa story. 
> 
> Enjoy!

"Honey, don't forget we have lunch with the Johnson's tomorrow." Finn said as he was gathering his stuff for work.

Clarke gritted her teeth. She knows she can be a lot, but Jessica Johnson passed her by a landslide. They lived two houses down with two annoying sons. Jessica always talked about everyone on the block and Clarke hated it. Clarke had to play the happy fiancé as Finn was great friends with Jessica's husband, Michael.

Clarke was getting ready to reply when she remembered her tattoo was scheduled for tomorrow afternoon.

"Honey, I can't go. I'm getting my tattoo tomorrow."

Clarke watched Finn's shoulders deflated as he let out a long sigh.

"Why are you doing this? Are you having some mid-life crisis?" Finn's southern accent was strong as he fired the questions off.

Clarke rolled her eyes at him, "Why can't you just accept that I want this?" Clarke asked annoyed.

"Because it's so unlike you. You’ve never done things like this. Why would you want to permanently mark your body like that?" Finn asked desperately. Clarke shrugged. She couldn't explain it and shouldn’t have too.

"Why can't you support me? Why is that so hard for you?"

"Because it looks trashy. People are already talking about it. I can’t have that."

"It’s my body and my choice. Besides, Mrs. Tetter has a tattoo." Clarke pointed out.

"Mrs. Tetter also drinks herself to death. You don't want to be like that."

"So you think once I get a tattoo, I'll become trashy? Is that it?" Clarke asked slowly and huffed when she saw Finn nod.

"I can't see you with one." Finn said quietly.

"Well that's just fine, because I'm not asking you, Finn. I'm telling you." Clarke said as she gathered her stuff up and left her fiancé in the middle of their kitchen looking stupid.

Clarke loved Finn, but sometimes she wanted to strangle him. Have you ever loved someone so much that you would do anything for them?  Would you overlook their flaws?

Clarke knows she has flaws, but there were a lot of annoying things Finn did that she tolerated. All because she loved him. They share a mini cooper car and he always forgot to put gas in it. He never puts the toilet seat down, leaves his hair in the sink after he shaves and leaves his clothes everywhere. Clarke knew Finn was messy. You would think he would be a clean man, well he wasn't. He can't even boil water without messing it up.

Clarke loved him for all the things he couldn't do and had supported him through everything. Clarke supported him when he grew his hair out, when he grew a mustache and when he took up smoking cigars. She hated all of it, but never told him not too. Why couldn't he fathom the idea of her getting a tattoo?

Clarke shook her head. This was absolutely ridiculous. If he couldn’t support her, fine. She didn’t need it. She didn't look back before angrily walking out the front door.

* * *

  
The next day, she headed to Nightblood Ink, instead of having lunch with Finn and the Johnson’s. Of course, it didn't stop Finn from calling every five minutes. She was getting irritated and wanted to yell, but didn't want to get caught screaming on her phone in public. Clarke listened to her voicemail where Finn repeatedly bashed her for getting her tattoo.

_I can't believe you have the audacity to do this. What will people think?_

_  
_ _People are probably going to see it on our wedding day. You do realize this. They’re going to think I’m trashy now, thanks to you._

  
_Why would you ruin your body like this?_

Clarke clenched her jaw listening, before turning her phone off. She couldn't believe after five years together, Finn couldn't understand why she wanted to do this.

Before, anytime the conversation came up, it was always brushed over, much like the other day, but Clarke was sick of it and finally had to courage to do it.

Clarke sighed as she looked up at Lexa's tattoo shop. She had put her car in park before gathering her things. Clarke got out of the car before she could talk herself out of it.

Clarke was smiling as she entered the tattoo shop. There was a tall girl, with high cheekbones and brunette hair. The tips were dyed blonde. She was standing behind the front desk. Clarke walked up to her.

"My name is Clarke Griffin. I have a two o'clock appointment with Lexa Woods." Clarke said confidently as she rested her hands against the counter. The brunette haired girl opened her mouth to speak, when Lexa came around the corner.

"Hey, sweetheart." Clarke genuinely smiled. She had been hoping to be greeted like that and batted her eyelashes at Lexa.

"Hi, Lexa." Clarke said sweetly. Lexa nodded back in greeting.

"I got this, Anya." Lexa said. The girl, Anya, nodded and walked over to Lincoln.

"Come on back." Lexa said before walking away. Clarke followed Lexa still smiling. She had wanted to be comfortable today, so opted not to wear a dress. Instead, she was wearing jeans and a white shirt as they walked into a room next to Lexa's office.

  
"Have a seat, sweetheart." Lexa said. Clarke listened to her respectfully.

"You figure out where you want it? " Lexa asked as she sat down in front of her. Lexa's smell was addicting and her green eyes popped with the mascara she was wearing. She was really pretty, Clarke noticed, making her blush. She cleared her throat, hoping Lexa didn’t notice.

"Yes, my upper chest on my left side. Right before my breast." Clarke answered and tried not to blush again. Lexa didn’t look fazed, like she had heard this before which she probably had. 

"Sounds good, sweetheart. You're going to need to remove your shirt. The door is closed and locked for privacy purposes, just so you know." Lexa explained as she continued setting up and Clarke nodded dumbly. She was glad that she was wearing a cute black bra as she awkwardly took off her shirt. Clarke was grateful that she went to the gym three times a week. She smiled down at her abs and waited for Lexa.

"No moral support from the soon to be hubby?" Lexa asked with a smirk, getting up. Clarke watched her wash her hands thoroughly.

"Nope. I turned my phone off. He was being an ass and I don't have time for it." Clarke answered as Lexa turned around. Clarke saw her cheeks flush and smirked. She tended to have that effect on people. She knew her breasts were big and used them shamelessly to her advantage, especially to get free drinks.

"I get a lot of free drinks with these bad girls." Clarke purred making Lexa blush even more.

"Since this is your first time and I know you’re nervous," Lexa gave Clarke a pointed look, trying to regain her composure. "You may talk to me if you want, but remember I still need to concentrate." She said as she put latex gloves on.

  
Lexa moved her bra strap down on her shoulder and pointed to the area.

"This is the area?" Lexa asked. Clarke nodded confidently.

"Yes."

Clarke stayed completely still as Lexa went through the process of cleaning and disinfecting the area as well as sterilizing her tools. Clarke was nervous. She knew this was going to hurt and didn't want to show any pain in front of Lexa.

"We have a towel and you can do whatever you want with it. Bite it, squeeze it. Anything you need." Lexa said as she dropped a towel in Clarke's lap. Clarke could feel herself start to sweat because she was scared and half naked in front of Lexa.

"Okay." Clarke said, barely above a whisper. Clarke was trying to keep calm, but seeing it was about to happen, she freaked out. She had nobody there with her. Her father was working and she knew her mother and Finn would have never come. She had wanted to do this by herself, but now she was wanting to back out.

Lexa had finished her prep work, so she sat down again in front of Clarke. Lexa adjusted Clarke's chair so Clarke was closer to her. Clarke could see the little specks of green in her pupils which helped calm Clarke down, but only for a minute.

The second Lexa brought the needle up, Clarke freaked out.

"Wait!" Clarke yelled so loud, it made Lexa jump. Clarke didn't say anything else, she didn’t need too. Lexa looked at her softly.

"We don't have to do this today, if you don't want." Lexa said. Clarke shook her head. She wanted this for herself, but she also wanted to rub it in Finn's face.

"This needle is to draw it and the other is to color it in,” Lexa explained. “I'm going to apply some gel because it will make the needle move easier. You have nothing to worry about. I cleaned and sanitized everything. If you need a break, just let me know. Talk to me, Clarke, while I draw the tattoo. It will help distract you." Lexa said gently. Clarke nodded again, not trusting her voice.

"How's the wedding planning?" Lexa asked. Clarke focused her attention on that. She hadn't had a wedding session with Jennifer since the seating arrangement incident, but she had one again tomorrow.

"It's okay. We have a lot to plan and..." Clarke stopped talking as Lexa applied the needle to her skin, making Clarke hiss. Lexa gently cooed at her. Clarke immediately moved her hand to Lexa's thigh, needing the touch. She gave Lexa the go ahead to keep going, even though her body screamed at her to stop.

Clarke didn't have a very high tolerance of pain. This was one of the reasons why she didn't want to get pregnant. She knew she would be a nightmare when she went into labor.

Clarke had a death grip on Lexa's thigh as she continued to work.

"I'm not going to lie. This is going to hurt especially since this is your first time."

"That's what she said." Clarke smirked. Lexa chuckled, but stayed completely still, her focus on what she was doing.

"The outlining might be worse than the coloring, but it depends on your tolerance of pain."

"I have a very low tolerance." Clarke whined out. She didn't know how to describe the feeling, but the constant talking was helping.

Clarke wanted to move as Lexa traced the outline of her tattoo, but Lexa had a death grip on her shoulder, while Clarke in turn, had a death grip on Lexa's thigh.

"Let up why don't you." Lexa teased making Clarke huff.

"This was a terrible idea. It hurts." Clarke whined pathetically. She didn't want to show any pain, but she couldn’t help it. She was biting down on her lip so hard, she was drawing blood.

"I'm sorry, sweetheart." Lexa said sincerely. Clarke just nodded. She couldn't form any words.

* * *

 

An hour had passed and Lexa was finally finished outlining the tattoo. The brunette dabbed it down to remove all the excess blood.

"You doing okay?" Lexa asked as she switched needles making Clarke want to faint.

"Just fine." Clarke said with a overly sweet smile.

"I bet you want to kill me." Lexa said. Clarke chuckled.

"Thank you for the small break.”

"We can't take too long. I need to fill it in, but I'm loving what I see so far." Lexa said. Clarke agreed with her. She could see the outline through the small mirror on the counter and smiled. She loved it too and couldn’t wait to see the final product.

“I know something that would make all this better.” Clarke started out with a smirk on her face. Lexa raised her eyebrows at her.

“Oh, yeah? What's that?” Lexa said as she prepared to color in the tattoo.

Clarke looked nervously at Lexa. She wanted to blurt out the question, but wasn't sure how Lexa would react. She really wanted to know, so decided to risk it.

“Where's your wife? How come she isn't around to help you with Gracie?” Clarke finally asked. She heard Lexa let out a long sigh, but she didn't say anything. Clarke was certain she crossed a line, but she was curious. Clarke was about to take it back when Lexa started talking.

“My wife died.” Lexa said softly as she started to work on coloring in Clarke's tattoo. Clarke's eyes widened.

“Lexa, I'm so sorry.” Clarke rushed out as she shook her head.

“It's alright. You were curious. I can understand why. I take care of Gracie on my own, but sometimes Costia’s parents help. That was my wife’s name.”

“She was away on a business trip when I got the call saying her plane crashed,” Lexa murmured and listened to the steady buzz of the tattoo pen. “I don't think I've ever felt so broken. I ran upstairs, got Gracie and held her tight while I called her parents. It was the worst day of my life, but I was glad I had Gracie. I had to be okay for her. I had to smile for her. It hurt like hell, though. It still does.”

"I'm so sorry, Lexa. That has to be terrible, but it's amazing that you are still able to smile." Clarke husked with a frown.

"Just because I'm smiling doesn't mean I'm not grieving." Lexa responded as she worked on Clarke's chest.

Clarke took a moment of silence to look over Lexa. She was focused on her work making it easier for Clarke to really look at her. She was wearing a green flannel shirt with a black tank top underneath and wearing black jeans with a pair of black vans. Clarke still couldn't get over how amazing Lexa's jawline was. Her hair was up in an elegant bun. There was no doubt about it. Lexa was beautiful.

"You look good," Clarke said with a hum. Lexa raised her eyebrows. "For someone who is hurting, you look good."

“Well, I'm glad you think so,” Lexa smiled. “Some days are easier than others. Gracie was only a baby when her mother died. She probably won't remember her, but I show her pictures of her all the time. It's hard because she looks so much like Costia.”

“How long has it been?” Clarke asked softly.

“Almost three years.” Lexa answered. Clarke couldn't even imagine losing a loved one like that. Clarke knew Lexa had to be strong because Clarke was sure she would be a mess if it happened to her. No matter how long it had been, Clarke guessed, Lexa was still up and running because of her daughter.

Clarke frowned, but understood in a way. She did have something that made her want to be up and running. It was Finn and her company. She lived for bettering the lives of other human beings. She loved having Finn by her side while she did it.

Clarke knew she couldn't understand completely because she's never lost a loved one and didn't have a kid. There was no doubt about it, though. Lexa was a strong, independent woman and Clarke liked that.

“Well, if you ever want to go out and get a drink, just let me know.” Clarke joked, but stayed completely still. Lexa was right, Clarke wasn't all that focused on the pain, but still could feel it.

“That would be something. I haven't gone out in years.” Lexa said with a tiny smile.

“Really? Years?” Clarke asked incredulously.

“I like to spend as much time with my daughter as I can when I'm not working. It's hard to coordinate around her. Costia’s parents still have a life too and I don't want to inconvenience them more than I have too. I haven't been out in a while.” Lexa explained.

“Oh, well. That's it. I'm totally taking you out.” Clarke said easily. Like it was always going to happen. Maybe it was.

“I don't know about that.” Lexa gave her an awkward chuckle.

“What if I made it drinks at my place instead?” Clarke pressed, as she softly gripped Lexa's thigh. She didn't know why she did that. She didn't know what came over her, but it didn't sound like a bad idea.

Lexa gave her a shy look. When it was clear Lexa wasn't going to answer her, Clarke continued her assault.

“It would be just be us. I won't invite any of my friends.” Clarke persisted.

“I don't know, sweetheart.” Lexa drawled out, while avoiding eye contact with the blonde.

“What do I have to do to get you to say yes?” Clarke asked with wide eyes.

“You aren't doing half bad. I like the begging. It's cute.” Lexa smirked as she finally looked up at Clarke.

“You smile at my dispense.” Clarke tutted as she poked Lexa's thigh. Clarke was sure her palm was burning hot against it, but she didn't move her hand. She didn't want to.

“I do,” Lexa sighed. She was almost done coloring the tattoo in. She wasn't quite finished. She wanted to take her time and make sure everything was perfect for Clarke's first tattoo. “I suppose.” She said after some time spent in silence.

Clarke tried not to move as she smiled, “Really?”

“I want you to come back in next week so I can see how you are doing. Maybe then, we could grab that drink at your house.” Lexa shrugged like it was no big deal.

Clarke still didn't know why she was going out of her way to hang out with the tattoo artist. Lexa wasn't the kind of person she would normally hang out with, but she couldn't help wanting to get to know her. She wanted to see the woman outside of her work environment. She got butterflies just thinking about it.

Clarke wasn't judging Lexa, but it was clear that they were two very different people. Clarke wondered what Finn would say or even her mother. Lexa was covered in tattoos, Clarke was sure they would judge her and refuse to get to know her. Clarke wasn't judging Lexa at all. She could care less about the tattoos.

“That could work.” Clarke said happily. Lexa smiled up at her.

When Lexa was done, she patched up Clarke's chest and told her she needed to clean it daily.

“Thank you.” Clarke whispered seriously. She had looked in the mirror and was happy with the results. Besides a few moles on her chest, she now had tree branches looking back at her and loved it. Lexa did a phenomenal job.

“You're welcome, sweetheart. Guess I'll be seeing you next week for those drinks and a check up.” Lexa replied making Clarke nod in confirmation.

Clarke surprised herself as she brought the tattoo artist in for a hug. Lexa wrapped her arms around her waist. Clarke let out a sigh and lingered for more than she should have. When she pulled away from the hug, she kissed Lexa on both cheeks, out of habit. Clarke smirked at the way Lexa's cheeks heated up.

“Should I get your number? I know the number you gave me was your work one.” Clarke asked.

Lexa nodded as Clarke took out her phone. Lexa wordlessly put her number in before giving it back to the blonde.

“Alright, well. Bye, Lexa. See you next week.” Clarke said.

“Bye, sweetheart.”


	4. Chapter 4

No matter what, everyday like clockwork, Gracie woke up at seven-thirty sharp. She did sleep in her own bedroom now that was next to Lexa's, which Lexa was grateful for.

 

Lexa loved Saturday mornings where she could spend time with her daughter. She did work later, but savored mornings like this. Today was rare and didn’t mind work as she was going to see Clarke and spend time with her after. It had been a long time since she had a social life. Her friends had tried to get her to go out, but she had chosen to stay with her daughter.

 

Lexa yawned when she woke up. She was still tired, but heard her daughter crying. She got up and hurried into her daughter’s bedroom. Gracie's face lit up when she walked in. She reached her arms out and Lexa easily picked her up.  

 

"How's my baby girl? Did you sleep good?" Lexa cooed as she looked over her daughter. Her hair was everywhere as usual, but she was wide awake and smiling.

 

"Hi, mawa." Gracie said loudly in her ear. Lexa chuckled. They were both still clad in their pajamas as they made their way downstairs.

 

Lexa wasn't a chef, but she did know how to make chocolate chip pancakes because Costia had taught her when she was pregnant. It turned out to be a very good thing because Gracie absolutely loved them. That was over two years ago, but Lexa still was able to smile at the memory. She had messed up the first time so bad, even setting off the fire alarm. She remembered how they both had just laughed. Her wife didn’t give up though. Costia was determined to at least teach her wife how to make pancakes. She had succeeded and Lexa was beyond grateful.

 

Lexa set Gracie down in her highchair as she started to the batter. It was a nice, quiet morning for the both of them and Lexa was enjoying it. She would drop Gracie off with Anya before she headed into work. Lexa only had two clients before seeing Clarke for her check up.

 

Lexa was looking forward to having a drink with the blonde. She smiled fondly when she thought back to all the times her and Costia had, had date night.  

 

It had slowed down and eventually stopped mostly, when they had Gracie. Lexa remembered all the fun times she had with her wife and friends.

 

She missed it. She barely had time to herself anymore because of Gracie, but Lexa wouldn't trade it for the world. She loved her daughter and loved spending time with her.

 

Lexa was nervous though. She barely knew Clarke, but yet, she’d agreed to hang out with her. Clarke was a very interesting woman and she had no intention of backing out. Lexa knew she was only going over to her house, but it was somewhere other than her shop or home.

 

She had invested in her own tattoo shop a couple months after getting married, but had been an artist before that. She had made a name for herself in their small town and with the support of her friends, who were also her employees, she had made her tattoo shop the place to go.

 

Lexa poured her daughter some milk and kissed her on the forehead before trying to tame some of her curls. She had got her curly hair from Costia, and her chocolate brown eyes. She also had Costia's cute little nose, but she tended to make Lexa's facial expression.

 

   
Gracie squeaked happily and immediately started drinking it.

 

Lexa basked in the silence of her townhouse as she made them both breakfast. Lexa couldn't help but think today was going to be a good one.

* * *

 

 

Finn had frowned when Clarke came home the previous week with a bandage covering her tattoo. He didn't say anything, just continued to frown before walking out of the room.

 

Clarke had sighed, but there was nothing she could do about it. He could deal with it. She had already gotten it and didn't regret it for a second.

 

Clarke cleaned it like Lexa had instructed her too. Finn occupied himself in his office as usual and didn’t bother to offer his assistance. She had looked in the mirror smiling because even though her tattoo was foreign, it was greatly appreciated and loved.

 

It still took her by surprise anytime she looked in the mirror. Finn barely uttered a word to her, even though they were in the house all day. Clarke decided not to focus on him. Instead, focusing on next Saturday, when she would see Lexa again. A small smile formed when she thought about it. She couldn’t wait until Lexa was here.  

 

Thinking about Lexa coming over was what got Clarke through the week. It certainly wasn't her fiancé, besides he had barely been around. Clarke knew getting a tattoo had put a strain on their relationship. Finn was giving her the cold shoulder, but Clarke brushed it off and decided there was nothing she could do. She didn't think about Finn at all, the only person on her mind was Lexa and hanging out with her.

 

Clarke had just gotten home from work. It was Friday and she was mentally preparing herself for spending time with Lexa, when the tattoo artist called. Clarke let out a goofy smile when she answered the call.

 

“Hey, sweetheart.” Lexa greeted into the phone.

 

“Hey, Lexa.” Clarke greeted back with a smile.

 

“So, listen,” Lexa stated into the phone. “I just finished my last customer and was going to head home and shower. Why don't I just look over the tattoo at your place?” She asked.

 

Finn would be home soon, but Clarke knew he wouldn’t be home for long. Clarke shrugged because it wasn't a bad idea.

 

“Sure thing. I'll text you when to head over.”

* * *

 

Clarke was shocked when she saw Lexa pull up in her driveway, but she was also extremely excited. She had waited to text the brunette her address until Finn had left. She had told him, Harper was coming over to hang out and he left so they could have a girls night.

 

Clarke smirked at how easily Finn had believed her when she told him. After he left, she waited for Lexa. She already had dinner in the oven as she had opted for something simple, a chicken casserole.

 

When Lexa pulled into her driveway, Clarke opened her door to greet her.

 

“That's some ride you got there.” Clarke said eyeing Lexa's car. Clarke wasn't sure what she should look at first, the car or Lexa. She did both. She quickly skimmed over Lexa's body. She was wearing jeans and a navy dress shirt with her hair down and swept over one shoulder. She looked absolutely stunning.

 

Lexa drove a 2014 Black Ford Mustang. It was shiny, like it just got detailed. Through the windshield, Clarke could see that the car had black and red seats. It was an impressive ride.

 

“Thank you. Bought it myself, sweetheart.” Lexa said gently patting her car affectionately. Lexa took one last look at her Mustang before looking back at Clarke.

 

Clarke wanted to retreat under Lexa's intense gaze, but she held her own. She stared right back as Lexa walked up her driveway.

 

“Nice house you got here.” Lexa said breaking their gaze. Lexa stopped walking when she was next to Clarke.

 

“Thank you.” Clarke hadn’t bought the house herself. It was a gift from her parents when she became CEO.

 

The house her parents bought her was huge. Far bigger than it should be as she didn't want kids. There many rooms with a nice garden in the front. Clarke didn't like to get dirty, but she kept up with her garden to compete with the other hungry, egotistical moms in her neighborhood. Her house also had two garages and a backyard with a hot tub and pool.  

 

“Shall we go inside? Dinner is in the oven.” Clarke informed the brunette. Clarke had asked if chicken casserole was good, which Lexa agreed to.

 

“Sure, sweetheart,” Lexa said softly as she followed the blonde. “I didn't want to show up empty handed so I brought a bottle of red wine.” Lexa handed over the bottle to Clarke who grinned.

 

“Perfect.” That was the only word Clarke uttered as she turned around.

 

Lexa looked around in awe. It was four times bigger than her townhouse. The stairs were wide and long, climbing all the way to the top, with a balcony overlooking the front room.

 

Clarke lead them into the kitchen, which was large and homey. It was very modern in décor, with dark gray granite counter tops and high end appliances. It had a huge center island with a six burner stove on top of it.

 

Lexa's kitchen easily took up only a section of Clarke's. There was a dinner table set for eight on the other side as well.

 

“That's quite the table for only two people.” Lexa quipped with a smirk.

 

“It makes sense when you have a lot of family.” Clarke retorted. Lexa coughed lightly to cover up her embarrassment.

 

“Is Gracie with the grandparents?” Clarke asked leaning against the counter. Lexa walked closer to her. She felt out of place walking across the glossy, dark hardwood floors.

 

“Yes. I'll be picking her up after this.” Lexa answered.

 

Clarke took a moment to answer. She had a devious look on her face as she looked at Lexa.

 

“Well, let's get this party started. Do you want that drink now or during dinner?” Clarke asked heading to the fridge. She was wearing a black fitted dress that she felt comfortable in.

 

“Now is fine.” Lexa responded politely. Clarke nodded getting out two glasses to pour the wine.

 

Lexa tapped her glass softly, signaling for Clarke to stop pouring. Clarke respectfully stopped and poured herself a drink.

 

Clarke walked out of the kitchen without a word with Lexa following close behind.

 

They sat down on the huge beige sectional. Lexa thought it was a terrible color before she remembered that Clarke didn't have kids. Lexa was sure Gracie would have destroyed it if it was in their house.

 

“Your tattoo looks like it's healing properly. You've been cleaning it?” Lexa said inspecting the tattoo.

 

Clarke tilted her head down to look too.

 

“Well, I had a very good artist do it for me and I've been cleaning it daily, yes.” Clarke responded smoothly.

 

Lexa’s lips curled, but she didn't say anything. She took a sip of her wine to stall her reply.

 

“I don't know who this tattoo artist is, but she did a damn good job.” Lexa smiled, like she was proud of her joke.

 

“Oh, yes. She did a phenomenal job. I'll have to give you her number.” Clarke played along taking a sip of her wine. She was sure her friends would make fun of her for the little game they were playing.

 

“What made you want to get married? Other than the fact that your fiancé asked?” Lexa asked out of nowhere. If Clarke was taken back by the question, she didn't let it show.

 

Clarke hummed, sipping her wine. She sat back, astonished. She hadn't really thought about it. She had only been engaged for a month, and yet hadn't once thought about why she wanted to get married. Because she loved Finn? Because she could see a future with him? Finn wasn't the only person she had thought that about, once upon a time.

 

“Because I love him?” Clarke half stated- half asked. She was still thrown off guard. She hadn't been expecting the question.

 

“I'm sure a woman like you has been in love once or twice. What makes him special?” Lexa asked. She didn't know what came over her. She just wanted to know.

 

“He makes me feel secure. Despite everything with the tattoo, he's a really great guy. I fell in love with him and when he asked me so I said yes.” Clarke answered. Lexa took a minute to look Clarke over before replying.

 

“So, the reason you’re getting married is because you said yes to his proposal?” Lexa asked tilting her head to the side.

 

Clarke huffed out a breath, not sure where this was going. Lexa was baiting her, but Clarke wasn't one to back down.

 

“A lot of girls say yes when the guy proposes.” Clarke said deliberately to gain the upper hand.

 

“There's usually reasons though. More than he's a great guy and makes me feel secure?” Lexa's voice went up a couple notches to imitate Clarke's.

 

Clarke almost threw a pillow at Lexa. _Almost._ She looked back at her though, after setting her wine glass down on the coffee table, Lexa did the same.

 

“I'm not one for emotion,” Clarke started out shakily. “I do love him. I can see a future with him. If I really think about it, he'd be my forever. We've been together for five years.”

 

Lexa finally backed off a bit. A part of her not really knowing where the attack came from. She would cease fire for now, but fired one more shot.

 

Lexa leaned against the couch, before asking her next question.

 

"Do you want kids?" She asked.

  
  
"I don't." Clarke answered honestly.

 

Lexa nodded, taking it in.

  
  
"Why not?"

  
  
"Gracie seems wonderful, but that really isn't my style. Finn and I agreed, we wouldn't have any kids."

  
  
"Like not even a little bit? Maybe somewhere down the line?" Lexa asked incredulously.

 

"I don't see it."

  
  
"But you see a future with him." Lexa scoffed.

  
  
"Kids aren't for everyone, you know," Clarke reminded Lexa. "Not everyone wants them.”

  
  
Lexa stayed silent at that, trying to figure out who this woman was.

 

"Okay." Lexa drawled out as she dropped the subject. She couldn't imagine a life without Gracie. She absolutely cherished her.

 

“Five years is a long time.” Lexa said after a moment.

 

“How long were you with Costia?” Clarke asked curiously.

 

“Six,” Lexa said with a smirk. “We were only married for three.”

 

“Six years is a long time.” Clarke mocked.

 

“Yeah, it is, when you love them.” Lexa said with a victorious grin. Clarke let out a little grumble.

 

“What's that suppose to mean? I do love him.” Clarke said with her eyebrows scrunched together.

 

“Who are you trying to convince, me or you?” Lexa asked as she gestured between the two of them.

 

Clarke finished off her glass, before abruptly standing up. She went into the kitchen just as the timer went off. She got dinner out of the oven and started dishing it out on plates for the two of them.   

 

“Here,” Clarke thrusted the plate in Lexa's direction as she had followed her. “Although, I'm not sure you deserve it.”

 

“Don't be mad just because I questioned you.” Lexa said lightly taking the plate from Clarke. Their hands brushed against each other, making them both look up at one another. Lexa's gaze softened as their fingers touched. She allowed herself to enjoy the warmth of another human being, something she hadn't done in years, before she pulled away.

 

“Why can't you accept that I love him?” Clarke asked as they headed to the table. Clarke almost gawked when Lexa pulled her seat out for her. Finn hardly ever did that. She said thank you and sat down as Lexa followed suit.

 

“Why can't you accept that it might not be enough?” Lexa asked seriously.

 

“Because I know it is!” Clarke’s voice got high.

 

Lexa wanted to laugh, but held it in.

 

“Sweetheart,” Lexa drawled out with a smile. “You don't have to get so defensive. I'm just asking a question.” Lexa said with her hands raised.

 

“You don't have to be smug about it.” Clarke said as she cut through her dinner.

 

“I can tell you don’t want me to ask any more questions about this. I'm only saying that maybe your love for Finn won't be enough. Take it from someone who was married. The look on your face when I asked said it all.” Lexa could've sworn, she heard a mic drop in the background. The kitchen was silent as Clarke took in her words. Lexa almost felt bad for saying them, but wasn't going to take them back.

 

“You know,” Clarke said with her own smirk taking over her face. “The door is right there.” Clarke pointed her finger at the door.

 

Lexa let out a laugh, but would respect Clarke. She started to get up, when Clarke put a hand on her wrist, holding her in place.

 

Lexa looked at her with raised eyebrows.

 

“Thought you wanted me to leave, sweetheart.” Lexa said with a smirk. She was loving this game they were playing.

 

“I was kidding. It's rude, besides we are in the middle of a meal. Sit down.” Clarke yanked softly on her wrist, making Lexa sit back down.

 

“This is amazing by the way.” Lexa praised sitting back down. Clarke smiled graciously at her.

 

“I'm glad you think so.”

 

* * *

 

Clarke watched as Lexa looked around her kitchen. Her lips were pressed into a thin line as she stared at a picture of her and Finn.

 

"You guys look happy here." Lexa said pointing her finger at the picture hanging on the refrigerator.

 

"Yeah, that was when we went on a vacation to the Bahamas." Clarke didn't miss the way Lexa's eyes widened. The brunette seriously had her questioning her reasons for getting married, but she shook her head. She wasn't going to think about that now.

 

"Have you ever been?" Clarke asked getting the tequila out.

 

"No, I haven't." Lexa said quietly staring down at her feet.

 

"It was beautiful, plus had great service." Clarke commented as she poured them another round of drinks.

 

"I have something a little softer if this is too strong for you." Clarke said softly. She didn't want to offend Lexa, but had seen the way Lexa was eyeing the bottle.

 

"It's fine. I'm offended you think I won’t be able to handle it." Lexa retaliated with a frown.

 

"My deepest apologies." Clarke drawled out with a smirk. She slid the drink over to Lexa, who immediately picked it up.

 

"Your sarcasm is noted." Lexa raised an eyebrow. Clarke didn't respond, instead taking a sip of her drink. Her face scrunched up as the liquor burned down her throat. Maybe she should be the one to drink something softer.  

 

Lexa took a bigger swig than she did, swallowing it like a champ.

 

"Wow, I take it back." Clarke said through a tiny smile.

 

Lexa smirked back at her and took another gulp of the alcohol.

 

"I told you it's been a while." Lexa sassed as she put her cup down looking at the blonde leaning against the counter. There was an awkward moment of silence before Clarke suddenly stepped closer to her.

 

"We should do this more often then." Clarke rasped. She wasn’t sure why she was getting closer to Lexa, all she knew was she felt a pull. She didn't stop until she was right beside her. If Lexa was nervous, Clarke couldn't tell.

 

"Really? You would want that?" Lexa craned her neck to the side to get a view of Clarke.

 

Clarke found herself nodding, "I don't see why not. Despite you teasing me about getting married, I'm having a great time."

 

"What would the hubby say about that?" Lexa smirked. Clarke huffed out a breath because Finn was the last thing on her mind right now.

 

"Why would his opinion matter?" Clarke knitted her eyebrows together. Lexa took a sip of her drink before sighing.

 

"It's obvious, I'm not someone you usually hang out with." Lexa pointed out. Clarke studied her. She knew what Lexa said was true. It was like she was back in school with all the different cliques. Clarke knew she wouldn't even look Lexa's way if they were still in high school.

 

"We are grown adults. I think we are able to make a good judgement of character. I like hanging out you." Clarke shrugged sipping her drink, as it was giving her something to do.

 

"You aren't too bad." Lexa giggled.

 

"You have really pretty eyes." Clarke said seriously. Her tone was so serious that Lexa turned to look at her again.

 

There was an awkward pause of sorts, as they locked eyes. Lexa wasn't sure what was happening until Clarke took another step towards her. They weren't drunk, only having had two glasses of wine and a glass of tequila, but they were both definitely tipsy.  

 

"Clarke, what are you doing?" Lexa asked in a whisper.

 

This evening had been wonderful. Clarke was different than what Lexa had expected. No one had gotten this close to her since her wife died. Clarke's blue eyes were zoning in on hers. Lexa wasn't sure what to do. She almost pushed the blonde away when she saw her leaning in.

 

What the hell was she doing?

 

Lexa had her eyebrows knitted together in confusion, but that didn't stop Clarke. Lexa wanted to ask if it this was the alcohol or if she wanted this. Wasn't she getting married? Lexa knew she should push her away, but didn't. Lexa stayed where she was until she felt Clarke's breath on her lips. Lexa's heart increased tenfold as she felt butterflies erupt in her stomach. Were they about to kiss?

 

It was clear Clarke wasn't going to stop and Lexa didn’t want to stop her. Lexa wasn't quite sure what to do. It had been so long since she had any form of intimate contact. There was a purpose behind this, she could tell so she closed her eyes. She waited, rooted to her spot. Clarke brought her hand up to rest against her arm. Her breathing was coming in short just like Lexa's. They were two grown adults in unique situations and were getting ready to kiss.

 

And suddenly, Lexa felt like Clarke was taking too long.

 

Lexa brought a hand down to rest against Clarke's waist as she waited. It was the longest three seconds of her life.

 

Clarke finally leaned in connecting their lips. Lexa had been expecting it, but still hesitated. The blonde’s were firmly pressed against hers, making her whimper, before she finally kissed Clarke back. They awkwardly stumbled against each other, not familiarized with the other person.

 

It didn't stop them, though. Clarke cupped Lexa's jaw as she sucked her lips into hers. Lexa whimpered again, and held Clarke's waist tighter. Lexa's head was _spinning_. She had to grab onto something to make sure she didn't topple over. Clarke pulled her bottom lip into her mouth and bit down on it. A deep moan rumbled through Lexa's chest as she focused all her attention on Clarke. Lexa didn't think this was how the evening would turn out. Clarke pinning her up against her counter, kissing her. Lexa was kissing her back eagerly, though. Clarke let a soft moan escape, and Lexa’s knees almost buckled.

 

Clarke opened her mouth to lick her tongue across her bottom lip. Lexa granted access. Clarke's breath was hot against hers as they waited against each other. Clarke moved her hand to the back of Lexa's neck and squeezed. Lexa smirked and squeezed Clarke's waist.

 

Lexa was the first to break.

 

She glided her tongue into Clarke's mouth. Invading it, and wrecking everything Clarke had thought she'd known.

 

Clarke didn't waste any time smoothing her tongue across Lexa's. Wet, hot and soft. They stood in the kitchen, and battled for dominance. They pushed and pulled against each other, not tearing themselves away. Lexa kept coming back for more. She clashed her tongue against Clarke's until she felt herself lose her ground. She already knew her morals were thrown out the window. Clarke was getting married soon, and knew she shouldn't be kissing her.

 

But, Clarke wasn't stopping. She repeatedly kissed Lexa over and over. They didn't know what this kiss meant, but something _broke_ in Clarke as she kissed Lexa. Clarke wasn't sure what it was, but it kept her coming back for more.

 

Clarke kissed Lexa so deeply, Lexa's legs started shaking. Lexa's lips trembled with each kiss, but they still didn't stop. Lexa sucked Clarke's bottom lip like it was going to keep her out of hell. Their chests were heaving with the lack of oxygen. Lexa slid her tongue against Clarke's, and was preparing to lift her shirt up, when Clarke pulled away.

 

“I'm sorry.” Clarke stuttered as she pulled away from Lexa. The brunette let go of her, sliding out of the spot she was cornered in. Lexa didn't say anything as she faced Clarke.

 

Clarke was staring at her wide eyed, like she couldn't believe what just happened. Lexa couldn't believe it either. She hadn't kissed anyone in years, not since Costia. She couldn't believe she kissed Clarke, with tongue too!

 

“I should go, sweetheart.” Lexa muttered. Clarke was breathing hard, and Lexa locked eyes with dark blue.

 

“Okay.”

 

They walked slowly to the front door. Lexa kept a wide distance between them. Lexa’s mind was all tangled up. She knew she had been messing with Clarke when she questioned her marriage. She knew she got in her head a little bit, she could see it. She wouldn't take the kiss back though, however she did want to know why it happened. She didn't know why she didn't stop it. (She didn't want to stop it).

 

“I guess I'll see you around?” Clarke asked, hope laced in her tone. Lexa chewed her bottom lip before opening the door. She wasn't sure if that was a good idea or not. Lexa barely knew anything about this woman, yet managed to kiss her.

 

“Do you want that?” Lexa asked quietly. Clarke paused before she answered. Lexa had no idea what was running through her mind.

 

“I do.” Clarke finally admitted. Lexa gave her a single nod. She didn't know if hanging out with Clarke was such a good idea. She cursed herself because she wanted to see her again too.

 

“Well, then,” Lexa hummed. “I guess I'll be seeing you around, sweetheart.”

 

Clarke looked at her with confusion and terror in her eyes. Lexa frowned because she didn't know what she could do to help. She figured the best thing was to leave. It wouldn't be safe for either one of them if she didn't.

 

“Bye, Lexa.” Clarke waved gently following her out and standing on the stoop.

 

Lexa waited until she unlocked her mustang, and opened the door. It was a nice starry night with the wind blowing softly. She couldn’t help, but look back at Clarke to see her hair flowing in the wind, and the moonlight shining down on her. She looked absolutely beautiful. Their eyes locked one last time before Clarke broke it. Lexa had a much harder time trying to tear her own eyes off of her.

 

“Bye, sweetheart.”


	5. Chapter 5

Instead of soaking up every minute of her wedding planning, Clarke resented it. She couldn’t care less about the seating, the flowers or the food. All she cared about was an understanding of why she kissed Lexa. Although if Clarke knew the answer, she wouldn't be stressing over it and instead would be listening to Jennifer.

 

_“Clarke!”_

 

Clarke finally snapped out of it. She jerked her head at the sound of her name, clearing her throat.

 

“Yes?” Clarke answered weakly. Jennifer let out a long sigh.

 

“Where has your head been today?” Jennifer chastised. Clarke cleared her throat again, but didn't answer. She didn't know how to answer. She was going to get married soon, she shouldn't even be thinking about Lexa.

 

And she wouldn't.

 

“Nowhere. Absolutely nowhere. I'm sorry. Let's proceed.” Clarke said with as much conviction as she could muster. Jennifer looked at her warily, but agreed.

 

“Alright. So, what kind of-”

 

Clarke couldn't help, but zone out again. It had been a couple days since the kiss. Clarke had heard nothing from Lexa, and missed her. Clarke wanted to see Lexa again to clear the air. (There were other reasons why she wanted to see her, but she wouldn't discuss that now). Clarke wanted to make sure everything was alright between them. She had a feeling that it wasn't since Lexa had made zero contact with her.

 

She didn't know if she should’ve tried contacting her first, because she didn't know what to say. She had unknowingly put the pressure on Lexa, she couldn't put it on herself. But that didn't mean that she didn't drive herself crazy thinking about it.

 

Luckily for her, Finn was hardly around during the post kiss. Clarke was thankful for it because she didn't know how to face him. Finn was her forever. He had proposed to her, and she'd said yes because he was her forever. She'd do anything for him, so why did she kiss Lexa?

 

She was aware that this was cheating. Clarke had vowed that it would never happen again. She wasn't a cheater, and wasn't going to start now.

 

She wished she could delete every memory of Lexa. The way her body pressed against hers, her tongue, her lips, her smell. If they had kissed any second longer, Clarke was sure she would've-

 

_“Clarke!”_

 

“I'm sorry!” Clarke said immediately, shaking her head. Jennifer gave her another wary look.

 

“I can come back next week when you're ready.” Jennifer offered lightly.

 

Clarke didn't know what had gotten into her. She always looked forward to the wedding planning with Jennifer. She was great at it, but her head wasn't in it right now.

 

“I think that might be best.” Clarke knew her behavior was off and it was noticeable. This was only her third session. Usually, Clarke made the most of them. She knew she was off, but couldn't help it. All she kept thinking about was Lexa.

 

Jennifer gathered her things up. It was Sunday and Finn was out playing tennis with his friends like he did every week.

 

“I'll see you next week.” Jennifer promised as they headed to the door. Clarke hummed in agreement and sighed in relief when Jennifer left.

 

She couldn't believe she was so out of it that they couldn't even get through a session of planning.

 

Clarke knew one thing that would put her mind at ease. She smiled, grabbing her car keys, before racing out the door.

* * *

 

Lexa and Gracie were out and about. Lexa wanted to treat Gracie to some new clothes, even if her pocketbook didn't agree with her. She would always try to buy Gracie anything she wanted that was within reason. She didn't want or need much these days. She hoped her daughter would pick out something quickly as she hated the mall.

 

She rounded the car to the trunk, to get Gracie’s stroller. Lexa unbuckled Gracie’s car seat, putting her in before closing the door. Lexa knew her daughter could walk, but didn't want to lose her in the sea of hungry mall shoppers. Lexa thought the safest bet was to bring the stroller with her.

 

Lexa was sure she would have linked her arm with Costia as they walked inside. Costia would have make silly faces and talk to their daughter. Lexa smiled sadly down to her daughter. She couldn't get over how much she resembled Costia. Lexa sighed, holding her head high as she walked inside.

 

She had been debating whether to call Clarke or not. She figured she shouldn't. She needed to stay away from the blonde, because she knew what would happen if she didn't.  

 

Lexa couldn't count how many times she’d thought about the kiss. It had been absolutely breathtaking. Lexa stumbled over herself each time she thought about it. It was mostly at night as it kept her awake, but she wasn't going to give in.

 

Lexa shook her head pushing the stroller, through the sea of hungry mall shoppers.

 

She was going to go to the toy store first to see if her daughter wanted anything. Lexa knew the toy store was on the other side. She knew she had to walk a great deal, but it helped clear her head.

 

Next to the toy store, was Forever 21. Lexa chuckled. The only thing she would potentially get from that store was their boots. Other than that, Lexa wouldn't step foot in it.

 

Lexa smiled down to her daughter, who was excited that they were going to the toy store. Lexa was getting ready to turn the corner, when she caught sight of blonde hair. Lexa's heart immediately increased as she thought about Clarke.

 

Lexa had come across many blonde haired girls before, but now every time she saw them, she thought about Clarke. Lexa really needed to get it together, because she could've sworn this woman looked exactly like Clarke. She had her dirty blonde hair, similar build and, was wearing a dress.

 

Lexa squeezed her eyes tightly, and shook her head.

 

“Lexa?” Lexa's eyes popped open at the sound of her name. She wasn't dreaming. It really was Clarke.

 

“Sweetheart.” Lexa breathed. She hadn't meant for it to slip out, but couldn't believe that Clarke was walking over to her.

 

“What are you doing here?” Lexa asked once Clarke was in hearing range.

 

“I was shopping for some dresses. How about you?” Clarke asked.

 

“I wanted to take Gracie to the toy store for new clothes. Then maybe getting her some cinnamon pretzels, if she's good. She loves them.” Lexa explained looking Clarke over. She looked amazing. She was wearing a plain black dress, with a navy blazer. Her hair down in waves, but her sunglasses kept her hair out her face.  

 

Lexa rocked on her heels as Clarke took in the information. She felt awkward because she didn't know how to act around Clarke. They hadn't seen or spoken to each other in a few days. The last person she expected to run into was Clarke.

 

There were people walking all around them. They were aware they had stopped in the middle of the mall.

 

“You could come with.” Lexa offered. She didn't miss the way Clarke's eyes widened. Lexa had surprised herself with that, but didn't want to take it back. She found herself hoping Clarke would join them.

 

Clarke nodded, “Okay.”

 

They walked for a few seconds before Clarke looked down to Gracie.

 

“Hi, Gracie.” Clarke said sweetly. The little girl looked up. Lexa had styled her hair in a ponytail today, and of course, she looked adorable. Her big brown eyes were staring holes in Clarke's face.

 

“Hi.” Gracie finally said with a little wave. They both smiled. Lexa was glad that her daughter was with them as a buffer. She didn't know what they would do if she wasn't here. It was still awkward, but they had Gracie to ease the tension.

 

“You don't have to come into the actual store if you don't want to.” Lexa said as they neared the store. Clarke immediately waved her off.

 

“It's fine,” Clarke said. “I don't mind.”

 

Lexa didn't believe Clarke at all, but bit her tongue.

 

“Okay.”

* * *

 

Lexa let Gracie walk around the store freely. She was touching every toy she could.

 

Lexa bit the inside of her cheek when she looked over at Clarke. The blonde was very uncomfortable with her stiff posture and beady eyes, whenever a kid got too close. Lexa let out a little laugh at how uncomfortable she was. Lexa let Gracie walk a few feet in front of them, while she inspected all the toys.

 

“Loosen up.” Lexa whispered. Clarke jumped at her the sound of her voice.

 

Kids were everywhere. Some were running around while others were crying. She heard parents calling for their kids to leave or trying to calm them down. It was basically a zoo, as usual. Lexa didn't take her eyes off Gracie as she didn't want to lose her in this madhouse.

 

“They are monsters!” Clarke whispered back harshly.

 

“Wow. You weren't kidding when you said you didn't want kids.” Lexa said amused.

 

Clarke huffed lightly. Lexa had noticed her keeping a close eye on Gracie too.

 

“Gracie isn't like that though.”

 

“Gracie is still a kid.” Lexa reminded her.

 

Clarke didn't say anything. Lexa thought it was cute how Clarke wouldn't let her eyes off Gracie.

 

“Your daughter is absolutely beautiful. I can't not like her. Everyone else's can just suck it.” Clarke said with a shrug. Lexa laughed this time as she went to scoop her daughter up. There were too many people around and she didn't trust them not to trample her.

 

“That one!” Gracie squeaked, pointing to a baby doll. Lexa thought the doll was creepy with its wide eyes, and awkward smile, but if it was Gracie's choice, she wouldn't say no.

 

They circled the place one more time. Lexa found a few coloring books for her, and Gracie found two more toys she wanted. A picnic basket with food attached to it and a Barbie laptop. Lexa smiled at the happy squeal Gracie let out as Lexa paid for her toys. She put them in the back of the stroller and left with Clarke in tow.

 

“I think this is where we should split up. I only bought one dress and you need to finish shopping for Gracie. I say we meet at the pretzel stand when we’re finished.” Clarke said, while they were walking. They locked eyes and it went unspoken that they wanted to spend more time together.

 

“Okay. Sounds like a plan.” Lexa said. They didn't have to walk far as the store Clarke wanted to go to was next door.  

 

“Okay. I'll see you then.” Clarke offered Lexa a small smile, which she returned, before she left to buy some clothes for her daughter.

* * *

 

Five shirts, three shorts and two new shoes later, Lexa sat down on the bench with Gracie in front of her. She was still sitting in her stroller and her eyes were getting droopy. They had ate lunch before they came out as her daughter tended to get moody when she was hungry. Lexa knew her daughter was due for a nap any minute, but knew she would want some pretzels first.

 

“Hey.” Clarke appeared behind Lexa, making her jump. Lexa was about to tell Clarke off for giving her a scare, when her daughter spoke up.

 

“Hi.” She uttered the word cutely, with a smile directed at Clarke. Lexa looked at her daughter in shock. Gracie was never one to take a liking to strangers. By the look on Clarke's face, she was just as shocked.

 

“Hi.” Clarke breathed when Lexa stood up. After standing up, Lexa noticed the dozen of bags Clarke had.

 

“Did you rob the store?” Lexa exclaimed. Clarke giggled as she set her bags down.

 

“What pretzel do you want? I can get it for you?” Clarke immediately stopped laughing when she realized that Lexa was preparing to walk away, and leave her alone with Gracie.

 

“I can get it for you.” Clarke said quickly.

 

“Scared?” Lexa sneered playfully. She was finding this whole thing humorous.

 

“I'm not scared. What if she cries?”

 

Lexa had the same worry, but the pretzel stand wasn't far. She trusted Clarke and it's not like she'd be far. Gracie seemed fine, so she tried not to worry.  

 

“You'll be fine. Pretzel order. What is it?” Lexa demanded. Clarke sighed as she scooted closer to Gracie.

 

“Just a plain one.”

 

Lexa could've made a joke, but held it in, instead turning on her heel to get them all pretzels.

 

Lexa came back five minutes later to find them in a staring contest. She almost laughed at the absurdity of it. She watched Gracie stare back, unblinking before deciding to interrupt.

 

"What are you two doing?" Lexa asked. Clarke looked up at her and blinked.

 

"Man! Lexa! I was winning." Clarke whined as Lexa sat down.

 

"Were you really having a staring contest with my daughter?" Lexa chuckled. Clarke blushed as Lexa handed her the pretzel.

 

"I might have." Clarke said, biting into her pretzel. Lexa took Gracie out of the stroller and sat her down in the middle of them. She got Gracie the bite sized cinnamon pretzels, while she went for a big one for herself.

 

Gracie happily took them and started eating.

 

Lexa didn't know what to talk about. Should she just stay silent and eat? They were all enjoying their pretzels, with Gracie humming happily with each bite.

 

"Are we okay?" Clarke asked, keeping her gaze in front of her.

 

Lexa sighed. She didn't want to have this conversation in front of her daughter, but she was wondering the same thing. She didn't know what was going on and she wanted too.

  
  
"Yeah." Lexa answered. Clarke finally looked over to her. Lexa could tell Clarke had walls up too. Lexa was sure hers were higher.

  
  
"Are you sure?" Clarke questioned.

  
  
"No," Lexa said honestly. "But we have to be."

 

  
"I don't know what to say." Clarke said quietly. Lexa sighed, looking down at her daughter. She didn't know what to say either.

 

  
"Neither do I." Lexa said.

  
  
They finished their pretzels in silence. When they were done, Clarke threw away their trash as Lexa put Gracie back in her stroller. They left the mall, quietly walking together.

  
  
When they entered the parking lot, Lexa knew they were about to go their separate ways. She didn't know what came over her. She wanted to clear the air and not have awkward pauses and stolen glances anymore. She thought maybe they should talk about this while Gracie was asleep. Her daughter was already rubbing her eyes on the way to her car. Lexa knew she would pass out as soon as she started driving.

 

"Do you want to come over?" Lexa asked. Clarke looked at her in surprise. Clarke held her head high, trying to regain herself.

  
  
"If you'll have me." Clarke spoke.

  
  
"I'll text you my address. Come over." Lexa said more bravely than she felt.

  
  
"Okay." Clarke said, a huge smile spreading across her face. She didn't even try to stop it. The smile Lexa returned was heavenly.

 

"Okay." Lexa said back.

 

Lexa hopped in her car, hoping their talk would go well.


	6. Chapter 6

The second Lexa got home, she put Gracie down for her nap before running around trying to clean up. She didn't have much time, but it would be enough to get the place looking decent. There were still toys all over, dishes in the sink, and mail thrown on the kitchen table.

 

Lexa wasn't the cleanest person, and having a kid made it that much worse. It had been Costia who did most of the cleaning and who helped keep Lexa organized.

 

Without her, she fell back to her old ways. Lexa straightened up the stack of mail and managed to put all of Gracie's toys away.

 

The place was already looking better. She folded up the blankets on the couch, before she heard a knock on the door. Lexa looked at the baby monitor, and saw Gracie was still asleep. She breathed a sigh of relief.

 

Lexa smoothed down her shirt. She was nervous, but didn't let herself think about it too much before answering the door.

 

"Hey, sweetheart." Lexa greeted opening the door. Clarke smiled at her as she walked in.

 

Lexa had multiple pictures of her and Costia on the walls including their wedding photos and of course, baby pictures of Gracie. Lexa saw Clarke looking at them as they made their way into the family room.

 

  
"Nothing like your place." Lexa said sheepishly. She was at least happy that she had time to straighten up before Clarke got there.

 

"Oh, no," Clarke waved her off. "This is wonderful," She said taking a seat on the couch. "I don't know about you, but all that walking made me exhausted." Clarke gave a dramatic huff when Lexa sat on the opposite end.

 

"Why are you sitting all the way over there?" Clarke questioned.

 

"Because, it's safe." Lexa said honestly. She started bouncing her leg up and down, something she did was when she was really nervous.

 

Clarke giggled at her, and Lexa decided to change the conversation.

 

"So, what do you do?"

 

"I'm CEO of Skai Corporations. It's a healthcare company." Clarke proudly explained. Lexa's eyes widened.

 

"CEO, huh?" Lexa said with a smirk. "I bet you’re getting _paid_."

 

This time Clarke smirked, "Maybe I am." 

 

"It must be nice running your own tattoo shop?" Clarke asked. She was intrigued and wanted to know more.

 

"It's nice. I'm definitely not making as much as you, but I do like running my own business." Lexa said.

 

"What made you want to?" Clarke asked.

 

"I didn't go to college. It just wasn't for me. I opened up a tattoo shop instead and the rest is history." Lexa shrugged.

 

“How old are you?” Clarke asked.

 

“I'm twenty-six. You?”

 

“Twenty-four. It's cool you run your own shop.” Clarke commented. Lexa flashed her a smile.

 

“Thank you.”

 

Clarke nodded to her as silence fell around them.

 

“I'm really sorry,” Clarke apologized. “About the kiss. I don't know what came over me and you were just… and I..”

 

“Clarke,” Lexa spoke. “It's okay. Really. It was nice.” She admitted.

 

“It was.” Clarke whispered.

 

They were plunged into silence again. There were so many things they wanted to say to each other, but didn't. They didn't know how. Lexa drummed her hands against her thighs.

 

“Would you… do it again?” Lexa asked, curiosity getting the better of her.

 

Lexa looked over to Clarke, who didn't even think about the her answer.

 

“I would. If given the chance.” Clarke shrugged casually, but it made Lexa's heart speed up.

 

They shared one more look with each other, gazes soft, before Lexa made the move for the both of them.

 

"Come over here." Lexa said with more courage than she felt.  

 

Clarke smiled slyly standing up. She swayed her hips walking over to her. Lexa had swallowed hard at her proposition, but wanted Clarke closer. She was becoming nervous, but Lexa couldn't remember when she wanted something this bad.  

 

Clarke straddled Lexa's hips before wrapping her arms around her neck.

 

"That's not what I meant." Lexa rushed out. Clarke raised her eyebrows in response.

 

"I can get up." Clarke said, already removing herself from Lexa's lap.

 

"No." Lexa said, locking Clarke in place with her hands. Clarke smiled down at her shyly.

 

They didn't hesitate when they connected their lips this time. Clarke's lips molded deliciously against hers and it left Lexa wanting more. Clarke started a soft grinding motion as Lexa wrapped her arms around her waist. Clarke titled her head for better access before she invaded Lexa's mouth with her tongue. Lexa moaned as Clarke explored her mouth, before letting her tongue collide against hers.

 

Lexa knew her daughter was upstairs sleeping, but figured kissing the blonde wouldn't harm anyone. At least, to her it wouldn't. Clarke was kissing her eagerly before she reached down and unbuttoned her pants. Lexa moaned because she could feel her dick harden, making her eyes widened. Lexa quickly pulled away from the kiss afraid of her reaction.

 

"I know." Clarke said kissing her on the cheek. The blonde could see the fear on Lexa's face, and didn't want her to worry.

 

"You do?" Lexa breathed out, even though she wasn't all that surprised. They did live in a small town.

 

"Small town." Clarke said with a shrug.

 

They stayed silent for a moment, before crashing their lips back together.

 

Clarke started grinding against her again. Lexa could feel each thrust of Clarke's hips. Her bulge was sticking out, and Clarke was continuously rubbing against it. Lexa could feel sweat forming as she tried to calm down. She was so worked up, and Clarke kept grounding her hips down which wasn’t helping matters at all.

 

Lexa whimpered as Clarke swirled her tongue around hers. Lexa could feel it coming with the way her body was tightening up. Thankfully, her dick was still covered by her boxer briefs, but Clarke was grinding hard against it.

 

Lexa moaned as Clarke planted kisses down her neck. The brunette held on to Clarke tightly as she started thrusting up. Clarke moaned at the action as Lexa kept thrusting her hips up.

 

"Words can't describe how hot you are." Clarke moaned into her ear.

 

Lexa couldn't stop what happened next, even though she so desperately wished she could. Clarke grinded down once more, and Lexa lost it.

 

With her boxer briefs still on, Lexa ejaculated in them. Lexa let out a desperate moan as she had a death grip on Clarke. Lexa moved her hips with each spurt of cum that came out. She squeezed her eyes shut because she couldn't stop it. Clarke gasped as Lexa's lap was suddenly warm.

 

Clarke's eyes widened, looking into Lexa's eyes with a silent question.  Lexa avoided her eyes at all cost.

 

"I didn't even touch you." Clarke whispered. She wasn't trying to embarrass her, she was just shocked she actually did that.

 

Lexa didn't know what to do. She never had that happen before. Not even with Costia. She motioned for Clarke to get off her. Clarke did so.

 

"I-I'm sorry." Lexa stuttered. She didn't want to get up, but needed to clean up the mess.

 

"Lexa, it's okay. I-" Lexa cut Clarke off.

 

"I just.. ejaculated in my pants like some horny teenager. I don't think I've ever been so embarrassed. Please just let me-"

 

“Lexa, there’s nothing to be embarrassed about.” Clarke pleaded.

 

“Easy for you to say. You didn't-”

 

Lexa got cut off by Gracie crying. Lexa cursed under her breath, looking down at herself in horror. Her pants were undone, and she could see where she had came in her boxers. Lexa didn't want her daughter to see her like this.

 

  
"I can get her." Clarke offered. Lexa looked relieved as they started walking upstairs.

 

"Thank you." Lexa said quietly. She showed Clarke where Gracie's room was. Lexa went in her room with Clarke, just so Gracie knew she was still there.

 

"Hey, sweet girl." Lexa cooed. Gracie smiled at the sight of her mother, but started jumping up and down at the sight of Clarke. The blonde looked overwhelmed, but gestured for Lexa to leave.

 

"Thank you." Lexa repeated, quickly leaving the room. She was mortified and wanted to change as fast as she could. She couldn't believe her first orgasm in years stemmed from a girl grinding on her.

 

Lexa went in the bathroom and removed her pants and boxers. Her dick was flaccid now, so she quickly wiped all the cum off her.

 

After she changed into a fresh pair of boxers and pants, she headed back to Gracie's room.

 

Clarke was sitting on her bed, and they were having another staring contest. Lexa tried to stifle her laughter, but couldn't help a small giggle coming out.

 

"Lexa!" Clarke scolded turning to the brunette.

 

"I'm sorry! You really need to stop having staring contests with my daughter." Lexa said picking Gracie up. She planted a sloppy kiss to her cheek before walking out the room. Clarke got off the bed to follow her downstairs.

 

Lexa walked into the kitchen, placing Gracie in her high chair, before giving her milk.

 

Lexa leaned against the counter with her hands in her pocket. She felt relaxed. Her shoulders weren't as stiff as before. Lexa almost smiled to herself, before she realized the reason she felt like that. She just had an intense orgasm with the blonde that was staring her down. They locked eyes for a brief moment, before Lexa broke it.

 

"I'm not going to have a staring contest like my daughter would." Lexa said, her tone teasing.

 

"I wasn't asking you to." Clarke husked. Lexa glanced at her daughter before looking back at Clarke.

 

"I don't know what to say." Lexa said honestly.

 

"You don't have to say anything," Clarke shrugged, folding her arms. "It's okay."

 

"It's embarrassing, Clarke." Lexa whined, avoiding eye contact.

 

Clarke frowned because Lexa didn't use her pet name. Clarke was starting to like when Lexa called her that. The blonde unfolded her arms and walked over to Lexa. Her steps careful, as if approaching a wild animal.

 

"Clarke.." Lexa breathed looking at Clarke with fear in her eyes.

 

"I can go." Clarke offered gently. Lexa sighed. She didn't want the blonde to go, but didn't know what to do.

 

"I don't do this, Clarke." Lexa said.

 

"What are we doing?" Clarke asked innocently. Lexa stared at her incredulously.

 

"You know what and I don't do it."

 

"But we just made out." Clarke countered, folding her arms again.

 

"You’re getting married. I thought you loved him. Girls like you don't end up with girls like me. That much is clear. You could've easily pushed me off. You didn't have to grind on me, but you did. Why?" Lexa ranted, before clenching her jaw. She didn't want to do this with her daughter in the same room, but luckily she wasn't paying them any attention.

 

Clarke stood her ground, boring holes in the side of Lexa's face.

 

"I didn't hear any complaints,” Clarke said evenly. “And, you don't know if I wouldn’t go for someone like you." Lexa looked at her with disbelieving eyes.

 

"You're rich and so is Finn. I'm not poor, but that doesn't mean I don’t struggle sometimes." Lexa told her. Clarke sighed, her expression soft.

 

"I'm sorry, Lexa."

 

"Is this some type of joke? Are you going to go home and laugh about it with your hubby?" Lexa asked. Clarke made a noise of disbelief.

 

"No, Lexa. I can't believe you would even think that." Clarke scoffed.

 

"Then, why are you doing this?" Lexa questioned. She knew she had stunned the blonde into silence. Clarke didn't say anything, before turning to say bye to Gracie.

 

Lexa huffed because Clarke didn't answer her question. Lexa followed Clarke to the door.

 

“I don't know.” Clarke whispered.

 

Lexa didn't say anything, and when it was clear she wasn't going to speak at all, Clarke did.

 

"I think I’ll go." Clarke said even though she didn't want to leave at all. Lexa glared at her, but opened the door.

 

"Fine." Lexa said.

 

"Can I at least call you?" Clarke broke her stubborn act, her voice borderline desperate. She knew the tension was thick between them. She knew she shouldn't be suggesting this, but couldn't help it. Lexa always left her wanting more.

 

Lexa chewed her lip because she knew that it wasn't a good idea, but wanted to hear from the blonde.

 

"I suppose." Lexa said indifferently, keeping an ear out for Gracie.

 

"Yes or no?" Clarke asked. Lexa sighed, relaxing her shoulders. She didn't make eye contact with Clarke when she answered.

 

"Yes," Lexa confessed. She was just as desperate to talk to the blonde. Clarke kept her face neutral as did Lexa. "Call me tomorrow night." Lexa offered, trying not to plead. Clarke gave her a single nod before walking down the steps. Clarke got to her car, and before she got in, she turned to face Lexa.

 

"Bye, Lexa."

 

Lexa didn't think about it when she said her farewell.

 

"Bye, sweetheart."


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I strongly recommend reading this in private. 
> 
> I hope you enjoy!

After dinner, and putting Gracie down for the night, Clarke called like she said she would.

 

Clarke had called her right after her shower as Lexa was settling into bed. Lexa turned her lamp on as she swiped to answer Clarke's call.

 

"Hey, sweetheart." Lexa greeted. Clarke sighed when she heard Lexa's soft voice.

 

"Hi." Clarke greeted breathlessly. Lexa smiled into the phone hearing Clarke's raspy voice.

 

"I miss you." Lexa said lamely. She just saw the woman yesterday, but still missed her.

 

"Would you be up for another drink Friday night?" Clarke asked. Lexa sucked in a breath, they both knew more was going to happen than just a drink.

 

"You should come to my place," Lexa offered. "Gracie's grandparents will have her for the night because I work on Saturday. Come over after I drop her off."

 

"Alright. I will. Well, I won't keep you." Clarke responded.

 

"Bye." Lexa said.

 

"Bye."

* * *

 

Lexa waited impatiently for Friday to come. She was nervous because of what she knew could potentially happen. What she wanted to happen if she was honest with herself.

 

Spending time with her daughter made the week go by faster, which was a plus. She wondered if what she was doing was wrong, but didn't allow herself to think too much about it. Clarke was a grown woman who knew exactly what she was doing.

 

Lexa sighed happily when Friday rolled around. She ate dinner with her daughter before dropping her off with Costia's parents. Lexa hardly looked them in the eye as she handed Gracie over to them. With a kiss on the forehead and cheek, Lexa left her daughter to go hang out with Clarke. Her heart leaped in her chest the whole car ride home, until she got inside. She didn't have to wait more than two minutes before she heard her doorbell ring.

 

Lexa opened the door, but didn't get a chance to greet Clarke. She was wearing a blue and white dress, and heels with her hair pinned up in a high bun. Clarke walked in and closed the door behind her.

 

They stood right in front of each other, gazing into each other’s eyes. Lexa was visibly shaking because she wasn't sure what was going to happen. She didn't have time to think about it before Clarke grabbed the back of her neck and kissed her. Lexa whimpered as she backed Clarke up against her door.

 

"Wait, wait," Lexa rushed out pulling away from Clarke's lips. "Are you sure?"

 

Lexa noticed how dark Clarke's eyes got when she asked the question.

 

Clarke's chest was rising and falling rapidly, "Yes." She said before she sought Lexa’s lips out again.

 

Lexa growled into the kiss as she picked Clarke up. Clarke yelped as she wrapped her legs around Lexa's waist. Lexa carefully walked them upstairs into her bedroom. It had been years since she had someone in her bed.

 

Lexa kicked the door close before she lightly pinned Clarke down on the bed. She pinned her arms above her head before she leaned down to kiss her. Lexa immediately slid her tongue into Clarke's mouth as she grounded her hips down into her. Clarke let out a deep moan as Lexa pulled away. She kicked her shoes off as Clarke unbuttoned her flannel. Lexa shrugged it off before leaning down and taking Clarke's heels off.

 

Clarke reached behind to unzip her dress as she shrugged her way out of it. They were both frantic with their movements, rushing to get out of their clothes. Lexa quickly unbuckled her belt before unbuttoning her pants. She stood up in order to pull them off.

 

Lexa slowly crawled back on the bed motioning for Clarke to move up to the pillows. Clarke rested her head against the pillows as Lexa held her weight with her elbows.

 

Clarke noticed the tattoos that littered Lexa's body. She saw a dolphin on one side, and Costia's name in black cursive writing on the other. She noticed a lion tattoo on Lexa's bicep and Gracie’s name spelled out with a heart and arrow going through it. There was also the phrase _‘May We Meet Again’_ written around her wrist.

 

“Your tattoos,” Clarke breathed out, running her hands over the lion. “They’re beautiful. You're beautiful.”

 

"Thank you. So are you." Lexa murmured tucking a few stray strands of hair behind Clarke's ear. Clarke smiled softly at her before taking her bra off. Lexa moaned seeing Clarke's breasts. They were _huge_. Lexa flicked her eyes to Clarke’s before flicking them down. Clarke nodded, understanding the request. Lexa leaned in to take a perky nipple in her mouth. Lexa sucked it as her hand moved to grope the other one. Clarke whined arching her back into Lexa. Lexa held her tight as she continued her assault. She could feel her dick straining against her boxers.

 

"Can I take your boxers off?" Clarke asked breathlessly. Lexa nodded eagerly as she pulled herself up. Clarke sat up to pull her boxers down. Lexa was nervous for Clarke to see her, but knew she was already at her full height. Lexa stood at nine inches long, and wasn't embarrassed about it.

 

Lexa did feel vulnerable being exposed to Clarke in the low lighting of her room. She was completely out in the open with nothing to cover her, but smirked when Clarke's eyes widened.

 

"Holy shit." Clarke stumbled over her words. Lexa chuckled as she looked down. The head of her dick was red and swollen. Her dick was throbbing in pleasure as she stood rock hard.

 

"It's so big!" Clarke exclaimed.

 

"How big is the hubby?" Lexa asked slyly.

 

"Not bigger than you. A couple inches shorter and not nearly as thick. How do you hide this thing?" Lexa was enjoying the attention because Clarke was so shocked. The look Clarke was giving her, put Lexa at ease.

 

"You're going to stretch me." Clarke bit her bottom lip. Lexa swallowed down a moan pulling Clarke in for a kiss. She trailed her hands down Clarke's stomach until she got to the waistband of her underwear. Clarke nodded lifting her hips. Lexa quickly slid them down her thighs. Clarke opened her legs when Lexa pulled away. Lexa groaned looking down and seeing Clarke was dripping. She licked her lips.

 

She could feel tears stinging her eyes which had her clenching her jaw. She didn’t know why she was getting so emotional when she knew she wanted this.

 

"Lexa?" Clarke asked warily.

 

"It's beautiful. You’re beautiful. Can I taste you?" Lexa asked desperately. Clarke nodded, opening her legs wider. Lexa leaned into kiss Clarke one more time before kissing down her body and settling between Clarke’s legs. Lexa's mouth watered wrapping her arm around Clarke's thigh. Clarke's center shined with her arousal and her clit was swollen red. Lexa looked up at Clarke and couldn’t help the moan that escaped when she nodded.

 

Lexa leaned down and thoroughly licked through Clarke's center, running her tongue flat through her. Clarke immediately gripped the bed sheets before throwing her head back and letting out a throaty moan. Lexa lapped at her folds before licking her way up. She paused for a moment, before leaning down and sucking Clarke's clit in her mouth.

 

"Oh, my god!" Clarke cried, gripping the back of Lexa's head. Lexa flicked her tongue against the hard nub as Clarke started rolling her hips into her face. Lexa moaned because Clarke's clit was throbbing underneath her tongue.

 

Lexa rubbed Clarke's entrance before slipping a finger in. Clarke gasped roughly, tightening her hold on Lexa's head. Lexa continuously pumped her finger in and out, sucking her clit in the process.

 

"Lexa!" Clarke moaned. Lexa smiled because she could feel Clarke's walls closing in on her digit. Lexa picked up the pace, until Clarke let out a loud groan. Her back arched off the bed before her body locked up. Lexa's finger got drenched in her release as she brought the blonde down from her orgasm.

 

Clarke was breathing hard as Lexa kissed her way back up Clarke's body. Lexa sucked her finger dry before she leaned down to kiss the blonde. Lexa positioned herself in between Clarke's legs as the blonde wrapped her legs loosely around Lexa's hips.

 

"Are you ready?" Lexa asked pulling away. She wanted to look in her eyes to make sure. They were moving at a fast pace, but slowed down as the events caught up to them. They were about to have sex.

 

  
"Yes."

 

Lexa lined her dick up with Clarke's entrance. Lexa concentrated, pushing her way inside Clarke. Clarke gasped beneath her as her head went in. Lexa bit down on her bottom lip. She had no idea how she was going to last. Clarke felt phenomenal.

 

Clarke's face was scrunched up in a mixture of pain and pleasure. Lexa was almost all the way in. She moved slowly as not to hurt Clarke. Lexa started panting when she realized that she’d slid all the way in. She looked down, locking eyes with Clarke.

 

Clarke sighed because she felt so full, something she didn't feel when she was with Finn. Words couldn't describe how badly she wanted this. Now Lexa was above her, her jaw clenched with her dick buried inside her. She was so ready.

 

"You can start moving." Clarke told her. Lexa nodded planting her hands by Clarke's head. Lexa groaned sliding out of Clarke, only to slide back in.

 

She kissed down Clarke's neck until she got to her breasts. She squeezed a boob in her hand before she started to pick up the pace. She needed to because she didn’t know how long she would last, and wanted to get Clarke off first.

 

Lexa started to pump her hips in and out of Clarke at a steady pace. Lexa was panting above her as Clarke moaned with every thrust. Lexa couldn't believe she was having sex with such a beautiful woman. Her and Costia had a pretty good sex life, and the three years without, took a toll on her. She didn't know when she would have sex again. Granted, she didn't think it would be under these circumstances, but was loving every second of it.

 

" _God_ , you're so tight. I'm not going to last much longer." Lexa panted in Clarke's ear as her skin slapped against hers. Clarke kissed the side of her head.

 

"It's okay." Clarke said wrapping her arms around Lexa's neck. Lexa buried her head in Clarke's neck, picking up the pace. Thrusting all the way in hard and back out. Her balls hitting Clarke's center each time.

 

"Fuck." Clarke moaned underneath her. Lexa's body was on fire as she jerked her hips into Clarke. Clarke's walls were squeezing her perfectly as she opened Clarke's legs wider.

 

Lexa lifted her head up as the bed creaked beneath them. Lexa whimpered with each thrust.

 

“No!” Lexa cried out. She could feel her balls tighten as her dick twitched painfully inside of Clarke. Clarke gave Lexa an encouraging nod before Lexa pulled out. Clarke quickly grabbed a hold of her dick before she could. Lexa let out a deep, loud moan when Clarke started to jerk her off. It only took a couple seconds for Lexa to spill her load onto Clarke's stomach. Lexa's hips were moving on their own accord as she rode out her orgasm.

 

When Lexa's orgasm subsided, she opened her eyes. Her cheeks pinked at the thick ropes of cum coating Clarke's stomach. Clarke swiped her finger through it, before sucking her finger clean and moaning. Lexa groaned before getting off the bed in order to find some tissue.

 

“We can go again,” Clarke smiled encouragingly. “I want to.”

 

Lexa smiled and gestured for Clarke to come to the edge of the bed.

 

“Turn around.” Lexa instructed tapping her hips. Clarke immediately flipped herself around and braced herself for the intrusion. Lexa pumped her dick a few times before invading Clarke's center again. Lexa stretched Clarke out when she bottomed out into her.

 

Lexa placed her hands on Clarke's hips before snapping her hips into her. Lexa spread her legs apart as she gave it to Clarke good.

 

There was no need for Clarke to yell out the words: _harder or faster._ Lexa was hitting it just right. Whereas, with Finn, Clarke often had to tell him what to do.

 

Clarke was left absolutely speechless with Lexa rutting into her from behind. Her knuckles paled white with her grip on the bed sheets beneath her. Clarke couldn't stop the loud moans from escaping her mouth. Clarke could hear Lexa grunting behind her with effort. She wasn't stopping. In fact, her movements were increasing making Clarke collapse on her elbows, which allowed Lexa to slide even further into her.

 

"Lexa!" Clarke cried out. Clarke hardly ever called Finn’s name when they had sex. She couldn’t help but say Lexa's name with her balls deep in her. The brunette kept running hands up and down Clarke's side while burying herself in her.

 

Lexa reached around, and started rubbing slow circles around Clarke's clit. Lexa moaned when it started throbbing beneath her. Lexa felt Clarke clench around her, and smirked. Clarke couldn't stop her impending orgasm from coming. The second Lexa started rubbing tight circles around her clit, she was a goner. Clarke couldn't even form words to tell Lexa. The only thing she could seem to do was moan her name repeatedly. Clarke felt all the air leave her lungs as she tightened around Lexa. She could feel her release flooding Lexa's dick. Clarke's orgasm didn't stop Lexa. She kept thrusting into Clarke, helping her ride out her orgasm.

 

Clarke felt empty as Lexa slid out of her. She immediately clenched down around nothing, missing her dick, but didn't have time to ponder over it. Lexa quickly flipped her over getting on the bed again. Lexa laid down against the pillows motioning for Clarke to get on top her.

  
  
Clarke threw Lexa a dirty smirk when she instructed her to turn around. Clarke straddled her with Lexa guiding her down on her dick.

 

It had been a while since Clarke did reverse cowgirl, but was loving it. Lexa immediately went to work pumping her hips into her.

 

Clarke's mouth dropped open letting out a low whine. Lexa was hitting all the right spots that took Finn forever to find. Lexa was moving her hips at the perfect angle leaving Clarke breathless.

 

" _Clarke_."

 

Clarke moaned hearing her name come tumbling out of Lexa's mouth. She threw her head back as Lexa pounded into her.

 

The deep moans that were escaping Lexa's mouth, were turning Clarke on even more. Clarke whimpered at the constant wet smacking noise that sounded around the darkness of Lexa's bedroom.

 

Clarke knew this was coming to an end. She could feel herself tightening around Lexa again. Clarke didn't know what would happen after this, but didn't allow herself to think about it. Instead, she locked up around Lexa's dick rolling out her orgasm. Lexa held her hips tight continuing to drill her hips into her. As Clarke's orgasm subsided, Lexa's hips faltered before pulling out.

 

Clarke immediately got off Lexa, grabbing a hold of her dick. She licked the head before sucking it into her mouth. Lexa's hips jerked up as Clarke started bobbing her head up and down. Lexa grabbed a hold of Clarke's head and pushed her further down. Clarke concentrated so she didn't choke, because Lexa was far bigger than Finn.

 

Lexa's dick was already poking the back of Clarke's throat, and Clarke hadn't even taken her fully. Clarke wanted to chuckle, but focused at the task at hand.

  
  
"Fuck, Clarke." Lexa groaned when Clarke wrapped a hand around the base of her dick. Clarke twisted her hand sucking the tip of Lexa's dick.

  
  
It wasn't long before Lexa was spluttering out her name, when she came. Thick ropes of milky white cum came flying out everywhere, even landing on Clarke's cheek.

  
  
Clarke gave Lexa one last tug before releasing her dick.

 

They collapsed against the bed absolutely spent and worn out. Clarke's hair was sticking to her forehead and Lexa was panting beside her.

 

Lexa was the first one to move, getting up.

 

  
"Are you okay?" Clarke asked, propping her head in her hand. As Lexa moved around her bedroom, Clarke noticed the arrangement of planets down her back. It was beautiful and very detailed. She wished she could've ran her hands over it. Clarke also noticed the broken infinity tattoo painted on Lexa's neck. Lexa's tattoos never ceased to amaze Clarke.

 

"No," Lexa sighed out, shrugging her shirt on. "I just had sex for the first time in three years. I'm not okay."

 

“Come here.” Clarke said motioning for Lexa to get back in bed.

 

Lexa sighed crawling back in bed, her dick flopping with her movements.

 

Clarke held out her arms sheepishly as Lexa fell into them. They didn't say anything when Lexa rested her head against Clarke's chest. Lexa could hear Clarke's heart beating fast, just as Lexa’s was.

 

Lexa lifted her head. She rested on her elbows looking into Clarke's eyes. Lexa already knew her baby blues were guarded.

 

“Kiss me.” Clarke mumbled. Lexa swallowed hard, but did as she was told because she wanted too.

 

She leaned down to capture Clarke's lips before sliding her tongue into her mouth. They both moaned the second their tongues found each other. They broke apart a few seconds later.

 

“I can't stay much longer. I told Finn I wouldn’t be out long.” Clarke huffed.

 

“We should probably get up.” Lexa suggested. They both groaned when they got up to get dress.

 

“Are we okay?” Clarke asked, sluggishly pulling her dress back on, and fixing her hair. Clarke braced herself before turning around to face Lexa. She had just finished pulling her hair in a ponytail.

  
  
"Yup," Lexa muttered. "Just fine."

  
  
"Your sarcasm is definitely noted."

 

When Lexa didn't say anything, Clarke spoke again.

  
  
"Do you still want to hang out with me?" Clarke asked quietly.

  
  
Lexa clenched her jaw, before she locked eyes with Clarke.

  
  
"I don't know.”

 

"What do you need?" Clarke asked as she threw her hands up.

  
  
"I need you to leave," Lexa said lowly. "Before I pull you towards the bed again."

 

  
"I wouldn’t have a problem with it." Clarke shrugged innocently, walking over to her.

 

Lexa stood rigid before her, not knowing what she was going to do. They were both fully dressed now, and all Lexa thought about was undressing Clarke again.

 

“I don't want to leave you. Not like this," Clarke shook her head, tentatively wrapping a hand around Lexa's neck. "You're so beautiful."

 

Lexa gasped the second she felt Clarke's lips on hers. Lexa desperately kissed her back, before pulling away.

 

"So are you, Clarke. So freaking beautiful,” Lexa sighed out like she couldn't believe what happened. “But you should go.” Lexa said softly.

  
  
"I will." Clarke said opening the door. Clarke turned back to look at Lexa with fear in her eyes. Lexa was just as scared, but they couldn't do anything about the position they were in right now, if ever.

 

"Bye, Lexa."

  
  
"Goodbye, Clarke."


	8. Chapter 8

"So, what were you doing Friday night?" The question threw Lexa off guard. She hadn't been expecting it, since Anya never questioned her.

 

"Nothing." Lexa had answered too quickly, which was a mistake.

 

"Charlotte called and told me you had plans. I was confused because I wasn't part of them like usual." Anya replied.

 

Lexa sighed. She should've known Costia's mom would say something to Anya. Lexa hadn't been out in years. Of course, Charlotte mentioned it to Anya.

 

Lexa stayed silent, knowing she was caught.

 

"So, what were you doing?" Anya repeated her question.

 

Lexa was a fool to think she could have sex for the first time since her wife and not have it show. Her best friend knew something was going on, but Lexa wasn't going to give in that easy.

 

Lexa got lucky, as the bell to her shop went off which meant she got to escape for now. They had been sitting behind the front desk, and Lexa’s face paled when her eyes locked onto baby blues.

 

Lexa didn't want to do this right now, not with her friends around. Lincoln's eyes flashed with recognition.

 

"Hey..." Lincoln trailed off, realizing he didn't know the blonde's name.

  
  
"Clarke." Lexa gripped the water bottle she was holding, when Anya said her name.

  
  
Clarke looked surprised, but recovered quickly.

 

"I remember you," Anya shrugged. "I'm Anya." She introduced herself.

  
  
"Nice to meet you."

  
  
"I'm Octavia." The small brunette also introduced herself. She walked over to her stretching her hand to shake hers.

  
  
Clarke shook it politely.

  
  
"Clarke Griffin." Clarke said in a firm, professional tone.

 

There was an uncomfortable silence that fell around them. Lexa wished she had customers to distract her, but no one was here.

  
  
None of her friends said anything as Clarke locked eyes with Lexa.

 

"Slow day, huh?" Clarke asked, looking around. Lexa didn't say anything, just continued to stare at her. Monday's always tended to be their slow day.

 

"I was wondering if we could talk?" Clarke asked softly.

 

"Can't." Lexa grunted.

 

"Lexa, there is literally no one here." Clarke waved her hands around.

 

Anya had been watching them in confusion, wondering what the blonde was doing here. Lincoln and Octavia stayed silent in the corner.

 

"I suppose I could." Lexa hissed, standing up.

 

She avoided the eyes of her friends, gesturing for Clarke to follow her.

 

"I think I might want another tattoo." Clarke said as they walked into her office.

 

“Really? Because you did so well with the first one.” Lexa rolled her eyes.

 

"You're right. I didn't do so well, but I liked the rush of doing something I don't normally do. I stepped out of my comfort zone and it was probably the best decision I ever made."

 

Lexa knew she was trying to make small talk, but Lexa didn't want to. She wanted to get straight to the point.

 

Lexa thought the weekend would help clear her head, but it only made things worse. She sat and pondered over what happened the entire weekend. Lexa didn't want to stall her question anymore.

 

"Do you regret it?" Lexa asked softly, sitting down on the corner of her desk. Clarke was standing near the door and walked slowly over to her.

 

"I thought I would," Clarke stated. "But I don't. Not for a second."

 

Clarke took off the blazer she was wearing over her dress, dropping it on the chair before stepping right in front of Lexa.

 

Lexa gaped at the woman before her. She knew a few things about her now, one of them being, she was absolutely amazing in bed.

 

Lexa wasn't sure what to do or what to say.

 

“I'm just as confused as you are.” Clarke confessed.

 

Lexa sighed heavily. She didn't even know Clarke's fiancé, and even felt a little bad for him.

 

“I don't want to stop hanging out with you.” Lexa admitted. She knew that much. Nothing could stop the aching want she had for the woman.

 

“Me neither.” Clarke agreed.

 

“Would you consider hanging out with us this weekend?” Lexa asked shyly.

 

“Us? As in Gracie too?” Clarke asked with a small smile.

 

“If you want. I was going to take her to the movies. You could come. We could have dinner beforehand.” Lexa explained.

 

“I would love to.” Clarke grinned.

 

“Really?” Lexa asked not hiding her shock. She wasn't expecting a yes, but was happy the blonde had agreed.

 

“Yes. Really. Call me with the details,”  Clarke said. “I have to go. I have lunch with my mom, but I wanted to see you first.”

 

They locked eyes again, before Lexa took a deep breath and extended her hand. Clarke took it softly, enjoying the feel of being pulled in by the brunette.

 

Clarke tentatively wrapped her arms around Lexa's neck.

 

“I should go.” Clarke muttered, looking down at Lexa's lips.

 

“Then go.” Lexa rasped, but couldn’t resist tightening her hold on Clarke.

 

“You don't know how sore I was this weekend,” Clarke whispered into her hair. Lexa's blood pumped hard in her chest at hearing her words. “You fucked me so good, I felt like I was dying every time I got up or moved for that matter.”

 

“Really?” Lexa breathed out.

 

“Yes,” Clarke admitted, placing a soft kiss to Lexa's temple. “I barely moved this weekend.”

 

“Well, good,” Lexa nodded firmly. “You deserve to have someone fucking you right unlike your hubby.”

 

“Don't get so cocky.” Clarke murmured against her neck. Lexa sighed holding Clarke tighter.

 

“That's not what you were saying Friday night,” Lexa said running her hands down Clarke's side. “Did I mention how beautiful you look today?”

 

“You did now.” Clarke responded.

 

“Don't you have to leave?” Lexa said gaze locked on Clarke's lips.

 

Clarke didn't say anything. She was staring at Lexa's lips with dark eyes.

 

She finally leaned in placing a soft kiss to Lexa's lips. Lexa's whole body tingled at having Clarke pressed against her. Lexa tilted her head to the side before deepening the kiss. Lexa should've known Clarke's tongue was going to find hers before they broke out into their familiar game of dominating each other.

 

It took Lexa by surprise, when Clarke wrapped her lips around her tongue. Lexa squeezed Clarke's sides painfully tight as the blonde sucked her tongue in her mouth.

 

Lexa's ears were buzzing, and every time Clarke sucked on her tongue, heat pooled in her stomach.

 

Clarke finally released her tongue when Lexa heard a buzzing sound again.

 

“I think that's your phone.” Lexa mumbled against her lips. Clarke groaned loudly before pulling away.

 

Clarke checked her phone, sighing in annoyance.

 

“It's my mom. I'm sorry. I should go.” Clarke apologized. She placed one more kiss to Lexa's lips before pulling away.

 

“That's alright. I'll call you later.” Lexa said, making Clarke hum in agreement. Lexa watched as Clarke shrugged her blazer back on. She stared at her longingly as they headed out her office.

 

The second Clarke walked out the shop, Lexa locked herself in her office to ward off the questions she knew her friends had. She wasn't ready to explain it yet, besides she wasn’t sure how she would even start.

* * *

 

Clarke had agreed to meet Lexa at a local restaurant close to the theater. Clarke was nervous walking into the restaurant, but didn't let it show. She took her sunglasses off while speaking to the hostess. They guided her back to the table where Lexa and Gracie were already waiting for her.

 

Gracie was sitting next to her mother in the booth. Lexa had gotten up, seeing Clarke approach them.

 

“Cwarke!” Gracie squealed happily. It always took Lexa by surprise how happy her daughter got when she saw the blonde. It scared Lexa because she didn't want Gracie to get too attached.

 

Lexa had never brought any girl around Gracie, besides her friends, but Gracie was familiar with all of them. She hadn't been with anyone after Costia died.

 

Lexa had no idea if Clarke planned on sticking around, and Lexa didn't even want to think about that right now, but still worried, for her daughter’s sake.

 

“Hello, Gracie. Lexa.” Clarke greeted them warmly, setting her purse down and sliding in the booth.

 

Gracie reached her arms out, making Lexa get up to let Gracie walk around and greet Clarke.

 

Lexa knew that Clarke was taken back by it, and was getting ready to tell Gracie to come back, when Clarke raised her hand. She didn't say anything, but Lexa understood.

 

Lexa watched with a timid smile as her daughter snuggled into Clarke's side.

 

“How was your week?” Lexa asked. They hadn't really talked to each other much. They were still treading on water with each other. They both knew it.

 

“It was busy. I have another wedding session tomorrow.” Clarke huffed out a breath.

 

“That should be fun.” Lexa hummed with a playful glint in her eye.

 

They both smiled at each other, like they were in on some secret. Maybe they were.

 

“Do you know what you’re getting?” Lexa asked. Clarke picked up the menu and looked it over. She had been to this restaurant once or twice.

 

“I think I might just go for a salad.”

 

Gracie had a kid’s menu, and she passed a crayon to Clarke. Clarke made eye contact with Lexa, as if asking her if it was okay.

 

Lexa chuckled and gestured down at the menu.

 

“Go ahead. She already beat me in tic-tac-toe.”

 

Clarke and Gracie both took turns drawing things. Gracie said she was drawing her, but really, it was just a bunch of circles. Clarke thought it was cute, before stopping herself.

 

Clarke looked around the room at all the other families and couldn't help but feel like she didn't belong.

 

She had spent countless nights talking to Finn about how she never wanted kids. The irony was completely lost on her now as she was sitting with the most adorable little girl and coloring with her.

 

“That’s some serious drawing.” Lexa commented looking down at Clarke's work.

 

“Mommy! Look!” Gracie squeaked at her art work. Lexa smiled happily at her daughter.

 

“It's wonderful, baby girl.” Lexa praised, before locking eyes with Clarke.

 

“I used to be an art major, a long time ago.” Clarke shrugged.

 

“What changed?”

 

Their conversation was interrupted when the waiter came to get their orders. They ordered before going back to their conversation.

 

“I realized that I didn't know what to do with it. There were a million things I could do from being a painter to a designer. My mom wanted me to go for something better, basically something that would make me the most money, so I did.” Clarke explained with a sigh.

 

“Do you regret it?” Lexa asked leaning against the table.

 

“I used to draw all the time, but I love my job now, so I don't really regret it.”

 

“I never went to college. Costia did. She was a political-science major. I can't tell you how many nights she kept me up with her studying.” Lexa chuckled at the memory.

 

Clarke smiled faintly at her. She didn't say anything, just let Lexa have her moment.

 

“I always thought I would regret not going to college, but it really wasn't for me.”

 

“You seem to be doing pretty good, with Gracie and all.” Clarke pointed out.

 

“With the help of her grandparents, yes. I guess I am.” Lexa shrugged.

 

Their conversation got interrupted again when their food arrived. Gracie went to go sit back with her mother. Lexa cut Gracie's chicken tenders up, before they all started eating.

 

“How's the wedding planning going?” Lexa asked taking a bite of her pasta dish.

 

Clarke took a sip of her drink, raising her eyebrows at Lexa.

 

“Wouldn't you like to know?” Clarke teased.

 

“I would. That's why I asked.” Lexa said back.

 

“It's going okay, I guess. We had to cut our last session short, which was on Saturday.”

 

“Oh,” Lexa sighed. “I'm sorry.”

 

“I told you, there's nothing to be sorry about.”

 

There was more Lexa was going to say, they both knew it, but neither spoke.

 

Gracie happily babbled away next to Lexa and they were glad for the distraction.

 

“Your tattoo,” Clarke gestured to Lexa's wrist. Lexa looked down at her wrist. “May we meet again?” Clarke questioned slowly.

 

Clarke felt like she was intruding on Lexa's moment. The brunette was smiling down at her wrist sadly. Lexa looked at her daughter, before locking eyes with Clarke. Clarke stared into those beautiful green eyes.

 

“It was a silly joke between me and Costia,” Lexa chuckled. “We would always say it when we would leave the room or the house. It was the last thing she said to me besides I love you.”

 

“Oh, Lexa,” Clarke breathed out. “I'm so sorry. I didn't know.”

 

“No,” Lexa muttered. “It’s alright.”

 

Clarke nodded, still feeling bad that she’d asked. They spent the rest of dinner making small talk, until the waiter gave them the bill.

 

“I'll pay!” Clarke exclaimed when the waiter put the bill down.

 

“You don't need to.” Lexa put up a fight, holding her hand out for the bill.

 

Clarke clutched it to her chest, protectively.

 

“You’re already paying for the movie tickets and snacks there. Let me pay for the food.”

 

“Fine.” Lexa relented. She knew she wouldn’t win.

 

When Clarke finished paying, Lexa scooped Gracie up in her arms and they walked out the restaurant.

 

“So, we’ll meet you at the movies?” Lexa asked buckling Gracie up in her car seat.

 

“Yup. I'll see you guys there.” Clarke said.

 

Lexa nodded. This whole thing was freaking her out. She didn't normally do this (no, she never did this).

 

Lexa offered Clarke a small smile before getting into their respected cars.

* * *

 

“Should she be eating all this candy?” Clarke asked warily as they walked to the theater. They had bought enough to feed a small army. Clarke had to help carry some, on top of the snacks that she’d gotten.

 

Lexa chuckled looking at her daughter, who was holstered up on her hip.

 

“She just doesn't know us, does she?” Lexa asked rhetorically to her daughter, tickling her in the process. Gracie giggled happily, before Lexa answered Clarke.

 

“We take our movie dates very seriously.” Lexa said, looking at the blonde. Clarke watched them with amusement.

 

“Didn't realize this was a date.” Clarke teased playfully.

 

“I-I… No- I didn't mean-”

 

“Lexa, it's okay. I'm just messing with you.” Clarke reassured her. Lexa looked like she was going to have a heart attack.

 

The lights were already dimmed even though they were one of the first to arrive.

 

“Can we sit in the back?” Lexa asked quietly, even though no one was around.

 

“Sure.” Clarke agreed.

 

They walked all the way up the stairs, sitting in the very last row. The screen was huge, and Gracie squealed at the commercials that were playing.

 

They got Gracie a booster seat that was put in the middle. Lexa was both relieved and disappointed to not be sitting next to the blonde.

 

More people started trickling in, but barely anyone was in the back row with them. Lexa smirked at that.

 

Gracie smiled happily as she ate her candy and watched the movie. Lexa was shocked that Clarke had agreed to watch Finding Dory with them.

 

Lexa watched Clarke more than she did the movie. She smirked internally when she saw the blonde smile during it.

 

Gracie had crawled into Lexa's lap halfway through the movie, with her head against Lexa's chest and her legs in Lexa's lap. Lexa smiled down at her daughter, before kissing her on the forehead.

 

Lexa could feel eyes boring into the side of her head. She turned her head, just in time to see Clarke turning hers back towards the screen.

 

Lexa sighed, because she wondered how long they were going to keep using her daughter as a shield of sorts.

 

Gracie started rubbing her eyes a few minutes later, before reaching for Clarke. Lexa looked just as surprised as Clarke did.

 

“Gracie, stay with mama.” Lexa said quietly.

 

“I want Cwarke.” Gracie pouted. Lexa threw another look at Clarke, who was looking at her in disbelief.

 

“Gracie, just-”

 

“It's okay,” Clarke whispered. “She can sit with me.”

 

Lexa looked at Clarke suspiciously before handing Gracie over to her. Lexa's heart pounded in her chest as she watched Gracie cuddle up to another woman. Lexa looked away because it got to be too much. Gracie had never warmed up this fast with anyone.

 

Gracie spent the rest of the movie in Clarke's arms, falling asleep in the process.

 

“Here I can take her.” Lexa said as the movie credits played. Clarke carefully stood up with Gracie. She softly handed her over, and Lexa didn't miss the relieved sigh Clarke let out.

 

They walked out of the theater quietly. Gracie was softly snoring on Lexa's shoulder as they neared her car.

 

“Well, this was fun.” Lexa said indifferently.

 

“It was.” Clarke hummed, avoiding eye contact with Lexa.

 

Lexa didn't know when things had become so awkward between them. Maybe it was the fact that they had sex.

 

“I'll call you later?” Clarke asked, rocking on her heels.

 

Lexa softly shut the door, before turning around to face Clarke. Her blue eyes were looking at her intensely.

 

“Why?” Lexa asked, folding her arms.

 

“Lexa-”

 

“I don't know what we’re doing and I'm very confused.”

 

Clarke sighed deeply, hanging her head. Lexa rested an arm on her car, waiting for Clarke to speak.

 

“I'm not going to apologize for it.” Clarke said stubbornly.

 

“I'm not asking you to.” Lexa protested.

 

“It takes two people to have sex, Lexa.” Clarke said in a pointed voice.

 

“Then, why did you do it? You’re getting married or did you suddenly forget?”

 

“You can't put the blame all on me.”

 

“But you’re the one in a relationship, not me.” Lexa roared.

 

Clarke looked at her stone-faced, standing tall.

 

“It’s not like you tried to stop me.” Clarke quipped.

 

“I didn't!” Lexa realized she was raising her voice, and lowered it. “I didn't want to stop you.” She whispered helplessly.

 

Their eyes flickered between each other's.

 

“I don't blame you, Clarke because I didn't want to stop.” Lexa said again.

 

Clarke looked at her hopelessly, before breaking eye contact.

 

“Neither did I.” Clarke whispered.

 

“I'm sorry for making this so awkward. I haven't done this at all since...” Lexa trailed off, sucking in a breath.

 

“It's okay,” Clarke said softly, walking over to Lexa and putting a hand on her shoulder. “Maybe I should go.” Clarke offered.

 

Lexa didn't want that at all, but Gracie was fast asleep in the back seat. Maybe they needed to go their separate ways.

 

When Lexa responded with a slight nod, the blonde turned around and left, but not without looking back wistfully.

 

Lexa felt like she should've said something more to prevent Clarke from leaving. Lexa opened her mouth, but nothing came out. Lexa listened to the angry click of Clarke's heels on the pavement before sighing and getting in her car.

 

She was in over her head, but she didn’t want to get out.


	9. Chapter 9

Clarke was sitting in yet another session for her wedding. She couldn't let her mind wander like before because this time, her mother was sitting next to her.

 

“Have you thought any further about the dress you want?” Jennifer asked softly. She was looking at Clarke closely like she was making sure she wasn’t going to zone out like before.

 

Clarke nodded, and prepared to tell Jennifer what she wanted, when her mother started talking.

 

“I think you should go for more of a puffy dress. It looks so beautiful with it all flowy at the end, we could add some diamonds to it and you would be stunning. And we would need something to cover your tattoo.” Abby muttered.

 

“While I can understand that,” Clarke said annoyed. “I just want a plain dress. And I'm not covering it.”

 

Clarke could see Jennifer writing that down and smirked.

 

“Oh, come on,” Abby scoffed. “Where's the fun in that? You know Finn would want you too.”

 

“I don't want to walk around all day in that. It will get annoying. I don't care what Finn wants. It’s my decision.”

 

“But you will be beautiful in that kind of dress.”

 

“I’d look like a penguin. I don’t want to wear a puffy dress so could you please-”

 

“So, let’s talk about food!” Jennifer announced to the two Griffin women, trying to defuse some of the tension.

 

Jennifer had her planner out and looked at the women expectantly. “What were you thinking?”

 

Clarke cleared her throat respectfully as Abby rolled her eyes.

 

“Crab cakes.” Abby suggested. Clarke was surprised she actually agreed with that.

 

“Crab cakes. Got it. What else?” Jennifer asked.

 

“Maybe steak, chicken, salmon.” Clarke rattled everything that came to mind.

 

“That sounds good.”

 

“Pasta of all kinds?” Abby offered her two cents.

 

“That sounds pretty good.” Jennifer said with a smile, writing it down. “What else were you thinking?”

 

“Alcohol. Most definitely alcohol.” Clarke said.

 

The wedding session went smoothly after that. Jennifer stayed clear of talking about the dress, even though it was a big part of the wedding. It could wait for now.

 

Clarke kept her mind off Lexa for the most part, but it was hard because she missed her. They had left things rocky between them, and had hardly spoke. Clarke had no idea what to say to her and it had been a couple days of absolute silence between them. She hated it.

 

Clarke forced herself not to think about Lexa right now, not in the company of her mother. She would push Lexa out of her mind for now. She needed to focus on her wedding plans and not the gorgeous brunette.

* * *

 

Clarke was cooking dinner after a long day at work, when she heard the front door open.

 

“Honey?” Finn called out.

 

Clarke took her blazer off as she worked around the kitchen. She tied her hair back before calling out to her fiancé.

 

“In the kitchen!”

 

Clarke heard Finn’s heavy footsteps before he came into view.

 

Finn walked up to her, after taking off his suit jacket and setting down his briefcase, to give her a kiss. Clarke gave him a chaste kiss, guilt immediately settling over her, before pulling away.

 

“How was your day at work?” Clarke asked, going back to chopping up the vegetables to put in the stir fry.

 

Finn went to go get a bottle of water and walked back over to her. When Clarke turned around, she noticed that Finn was staring at her tattoo.

 

Clarke clenched her jaw, but didn't say anything.

 

“It was good. I actually wanted to talk to you about something.” Finn said, taking a sip of water.

 

Clarke wiped her hands before giving Finn her undivided attention.

 

“And what's that?” Clarke said, swiping a few stray strands of hair away.

 

“I have a business trip coming up. I have to leave Friday night,” Finn said warily. "They will need me for a week. I need to fly out to Arizona and then I will be right back.”

 

Clarke knew that he was trying to make the situation sound as good as possible. Clarke usually hated when Finn went on business trips, but this time, she couldn't bring herself to even care.

 

She played her part, though.

 

Clarke pouted, motioning for Finn to come closer.

 

“You're gonna be gone for a week?” Clarke asked sadly.

 

“Yes, honey, but it will be just like that.” Finn said, snapping his fingers together.

 

“Okay.” Clarke sighed.

 

“Distract yourself with wedding planning.” Finn said with a smirk.

 

“I just might.” Clarke said, although she felt like something crawled inside of her and died.

 

Clarke smiled up at her fiancè. Finn leaned in for another kiss before pulling away.

 

“I'm going to go get some work done. Call me when dinner’s done.”

 

“Of course, honey.” Clarke cringed at the term of endearment spilling out. Luckily for her, Finn’s back was already to her. Clarke let out a little shudder, before turning around and working on dinner.

 

Her thoughts on Lexa the entire time.

* * *

 

Lexa cut up all of Gracie's pizza before giving it to her. She got two slices for herself before sitting down beside Gracie. It was Friday night and Lexa was getting ready to drop Gracie off at her grandparents. It was quiet for a moment or two, before her daughter spoke.

  
  
"Cwarke!" Gracie said, pointing to the empty chair at the table.

  
  
Lexa's heart leaped in her chest when she remembered all the times Costia was late to dinner and would rush in from work. She would kiss Gracie on the forehead before bringing Lexa in for a long kiss.

  
  
Lexa's heart ached as she looked over at the chair beside her. The chair had been vacant for years. Even when her friends came over, they would sit somewhere else. No one dared to occupy that chair, but the more Lexa thought about it, the more Lexa realized Clarke wouldn't look bad sitting beside her. Clarke wouldn't look bad at all.

 

“No, Clarke won't be joining us.” Lexa said with a heavy sigh. It had been almost a week with hardly any contact. Lexa wasn't sure what to say to Clarke.

 

Gracie was sporting a frown, which made Lexa frown too. Lexa didn't want Gracie to get attached to Clarke because she didn't know if the blonde would be sticking around.

 

Lexa offered Gracie a small smile before talking.

 

“But you'll see Char in a few after we finish eating.” Her daughter couldn't say Charlotte, so they had shortened it for her. Gracie would often walk around calling out for her, and Lexa thought it was adorable.

 

Lexa smiled happily when her daughter squealed at the mention of her grandmother.

 

“Let's hurry up and eat and then we can go see her.” Lexa said with enthusiasm.

 

Gracie picked up her sippy cup, nodding happily.

 

“Okay.”

 

While Gracie finished her juice, Lexa went upstairs to retrieve her overnight bag. Lexa wiped Gracie up before setting her on the floor.

 

“No! Up!” Gracie demanded, raising her hands in the air.

 

Lexa threw her overnight bag over her shoulder before leaning down to pick her up. Lexa grabbed her keys, locking the door before she set off to Costia’s parents house.

* * *

 

“Munchkin!” Charlotte exclaimed upon seeing her granddaughter.

 

Gracie smile widely when she saw her grandmother. “Char!”

 

Charlotte had her arms opened wide as Lexa walked up the steps to the porch.

 

“Hey, Charlotte,” Lexa greeted warmly. “Where's David?” She asked, looking around.

 

“Still working. Guess it's just me and you.” Charlotte cooed, reaching for her granddaughter.

 

Gracie leaned out of her mother's arms, into Charlotte’s.

 

“Here’s her bag.” Lexa handed over her overnight bag, like she had so many times.

 

“I'll see you tomorrow, Grace.” Lexa said, leaning in to place a kiss on her daughter’s cheek.

 

“Bye, mowwy!” Gracie squealed.

 

Lexa said her final goodbyes to them, before heading to her car.

 

Lexa knew she should've taken the right out of Charlotte’s neighborhood to go back to her house, but instead she took a left.

 

Lexa's heart thudded in her chest, knowing she was doing something scandalous, but couldn't take the silence anymore.

 

Lexa wanted to see her.

 

Lexa had no idea if Clarke's fiancé was even home, but guessed she would find out.

 

Lexa parked her car in the driveway before walking up the steps. She held her breath, knocking on the door. She backed up a couple feet, not sure what was going to happen.

 

When the door opened, Lexa groaned when Clarke emerged wearing a dark blue night gown.

 

“Lexa?” Clarke asked in shocked. Her eyes were wide, because hadn't been expecting her. Lexa wasn't expecting this either, but wanted to see the blonde.

 

"Hey," Lexa sighed. "Sorry if hubby is home. I just.. I just wanted to see you and I'm sorry if I'm interrupting anything-"

 

“Finn’s not here. He actually just left,” Clarke said quickly cutting her off. “He's on a business trip for the next week.”

 

“Oh.” Lexa breathed in surprise.

 

They stood there, staring at each other for a few moments.

 

“Do you want to come inside?”

 

Lexa probably should've said no. She should just have a quiet night at home like she always did after dropping Gracie off. But Lexa couldn't look away from Clarke. She was makeup free, and wearing glasses. Lexa didn't even know she wore glasses, and she looked absolutely stunning in them.

 

Lexa didn't know what would happen if she were to hang out with Clarke for a night. The possibilities were endless. Lexa knew her daughter was safe and well, maybe a night with the blonde wouldn't hurt.

 

Clarke was looking at her hopefully, biting her lip. The look she was giving Lexa made it clear that more than talking could happen tonight.

 

And Lexa was so ready for it.

 

“Yes.”


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Sin occurs.

Clarke moved aside, letting Lexa come in. Lexa had more than enough room to walk through the door without brushing past Clarke, but her shoulder softly touched Clarke's as she walked in.

 

They both sucked in a breath as Clarke closed the door.

 

Lexa looked back at Clarke expectantly. She hadn't thought her plan through, because she wasn't sure what to do now. It also didn’t help that Clarke’s legs were on full display.

 

“I was just doing some reading,” Clarke said. “Mind the glasses.” She chuckled, pulling them off.

 

“No, it's okay. You look really good in them.” Lexa assured her with a small blush.

 

“Well, then. In that case, I might just keep them on.” Clarke flirted.

 

“Do you want to head upstairs? Or we could stay down here?” Clarke asked after a moment of silence.

 

“We could head upstairs.” Lexa said.

 

Clarke smirked, motioning for her to follow.

 

Lexa walked up the entirely too big staircase after Clarke. Lexa couldn’t resist taking a look down and almost tripping over herself, when her eyes locked with Clarke’s ass.

 

There was a bedroom at the end of the hall, with two double doors. One of them was already opened as they walked through.

 

The lights were dimmed, and there was a book open on the bed. It was a king sized bed, with dressers on both sides. There were a few paintings on the wall and the walls were beige. Lexa thought it was kind of boring.

 

Lexa walked in slowly, not sure where to go. There was a big comfy chair in the corner of the room she thought might work.

 

Clarke went to sit down on the bed again, when she locked eyes with Lexa.

 

“Are you just going to stand there?” Clarke asked with a raised eyebrow.

 

Lexa cleared her throat before closing the door and walking over to Clarke.

 

“I didn't know whether I should sit or not.” Lexa answered.

 

“Have a seat.” Clarke patted the space next to her. Lexa took her shoes off before slowly crawling into bed next to Clarke.

 

It felt weird being in someone else’s bed, no matter what the circumstances. Lexa rested her hands in her lap, keeping a safe distance from Clarke.

 

“You can turn the TV on. I don't mind the background noise.” Clarke said, handing the remote over.

 

Lexa took it and their fingers brushed against each other. They held it there for longer than they should before breaking contact.

 

Lexa turned the TV on, and turned it to some random channel. Lexa turned it down low so Clarke could focus on reading.

 

Lexa uncrossed her legs, and accidentally brushed against Clarke. Clarke was in the middle of turning the page when she faltered.

 

“Oh, who am I kidding?” Clarke asked rhetorically. Lexa giggled softly in response as Clarke put the book down.

 

“I'm sorry for not getting in touch with you. I didn't know what to say.” Clarke said, playing with the hem of her night gown.

 

“It's alright. I didn't know either.” Lexa said quietly.

 

“I'm glad you’re here though. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you.” Clarke confessed. Lexa’s eyes went wide at the confession.

 

“Really?” Lexa asked dumbfounded. “I mean, me too. I can't help it either.”

 

Clarke nodded, not saying anything.

 

“So, Finn’s gone for a whole week?” Lexa asked.

 

“Yup. He doesn't come back until next Sunday.”

 

“What will you do while he’s gone?” Lexa asked.

 

“Clean,” Clarke uttered. “I need to do some serious cleaning around the house. I don't know, I was also hoping to see this gorgeous woman with amazing tattoos and a wonderful daughter.” Clarke said all in one breath.

 

Lexa turned to give Clarke a look.

 

“Someone I know?” Lexa played along.

 

“I think you would know if you met her. She's an amazing woman.” Clarke said softly.

 

Lexa turned her body so that she was touching Clarke.

 

“I think you’re amazing too.” Lexa said seriously.

 

"Do you want some cookies? I baked some earlier. Usually Finn would eat them all, but since he's not here, I have some left." Clarke said.

  
  
Lexa wasn't sure if she was disappointed or relieved that Clarke was trying to get rid of the tension between them.

  
"That would be lovely." Lexa said.

 

Clarke got up and Lexa wanted to scold herself for looking at Clarke's butt, but couldn't bring herself to do it.

 

Lexa watched it sway with every step before Clarke disappeared out of sight.

 

Lexa looked at the nightstand where a picture of Clarke and Finn was laying there. Clarke was sitting in Finn's lap, and both were wearing huge smiles. Lexa felt a little guilty that she was sitting in their bed right now, but Clarke had been quick to invite her in so she chose to ignore it.

 

She was going to make the most of her time with Clarke because she knew it was limited. She wondered if it always would be.

* * *

 

“I haven't been to the zoo in ages!” Clarke told Lexa. They were sitting on the bed, side by side, eating the cookies Clarke made. Lexa was questioning the things that Clarke apparently didn’t do.

 

“I was thinking of taking Gracie soon.” Lexa informed her.

 

Clarke took a sip of water before answering.

 

“That would be cute. I bet she’d like it.”

 

“When’s the last time you’ve been to the beach?” Lexa asked.

 

When Clarke took more than a few seconds to answer, Lexa chuckled.

 

“Do you ever do anything just for fun?” Lexa giggled.

 

“I don't count the zoo as something fun for the record and I do, I've just been busy lately.” Clarke shrugged with a small smile.

 

“We go every year. All of us. It’s… It’s around the time that Costia died. We go there and just have fun.” Lexa said.

 

“Well, that's a nice way to celebrate it.” Clarke said encouragingly.

 

“Sometimes I take Gracie, just to take her,” Lexa said. “How about a trampoline park? Or just a park in general?” Lexa asked with a smirk.

 

When Clarke made a displeased noise, Lexa spoke again.

 

"You need to get out more."

  
  
"I will do no such thing!" Clarke retorted.

  
  
"You won't do anything outdoors, yet you have tree branches on you."

 

"Now you’re just being mean," Clarke pouted. "A part of me knows why I got it but a part of me doesn't." She said.

  
  
Lexa pressed her lips in a thin line before picking up another cookie.

  
  
"How about an amusement park? Please tell me you have." Lexa begged.

  
  
"Of course I have," Clarke giggled. "But not since I was like sixteen."

 

"I'm not even gonna comment on that."

  
  
"Sorry I'm not fun like you. I'm a bore and chose to work every day." Clarke joked with a frown.

  
  
"You sound like you’re just surviving. Where's the fun? Where's the action? The rush or spur of the moment?" Lexa asked exasperatedly.

 

"Is that why you're here? The spur of the moment?" Clarke asked.

  
  
The question caught Lexa off guard. She took a bite of her cookie, giving her time to answer.

  
  
"I couldn't stop thinking about you. I just... had to see you. I guess it was the spur of the moment. I wanted you and now I'm here."

  
  
"You wanted me, huh?" Clarke asked lowly with a smirk.

 

Lexa looked over at Clarke, and her delicious cleavage that was on display.

 

"Yes. I want you." Lexa all, but moaned.

  
  
Clarke set down the plate of cookies.

  
  
"Well, if you want me, then come get me." Clarke shrugged innocently, but Lexa wasn't going to fall for it, not quite yet.

  
  
"I'm eating a cookie."

 

"Does the cookie taste better than me?" Clarke asked with a serious face.

  
  
"Clarke..." Lexa chuckled out nervously.

  
  
"Oh, come on, humor me." Clarke smirked.

  
  
"These cookies are good. Delicious even, but nothing could ever compare to how you taste." Lexa smirked when she saw Clarke swallow hard.

  
  
"Words can't describe how bad I want you." Clarke moaned out. She reached behind her to turn the lamp off, and Lexa couldn't control herself anymore.

  
  
She quickly brushed herself off before climbing on top of Clarke. They both groaned as their bodies melted together.

  
  
They teased each other, not quite giving in yet. Clarke would lean up to kiss Lexa, only for her to pull away. Lexa's hands would trail down Clarke's body, only for Clarke to softly push them away.

  
  
Lexa was never one to lose a game. She could admit she was a sore loser, but this time, Lexa wouldn’t mind losing.

 

Clarke leaned up, and Lexa let their lips touch. They brushed against each other softly, making them both moan. Lexa yearned for Clarke's touch again, and she had it.

  
  
Clarke placed a hand on her cheek, pulling her further in.

 

Lexa pulled away for a brief moment, looking into Clarke's eyes. Lexa felt like she was being pulled in by her dark blue eyes. Clarke had her lip curled, trying to get Lexa to kiss her. Clarke leaned up, invading her space. Clarke's breath tickled her lip, and Lexa desperately wanted to kiss her, but held out for a bit longer.

 

When Clarke tried to lean up to kiss her again, Lexa pulled away, instead kissing her neck.

  
  
"Do you bruise easily?" Lexa asked.

  
  
"I do." Clarke breathed out with a hint of a smile.

  
  
"I guess I'll have to take off your nightgown and leave them on your boobs."

  
  
"I think that would be a good idea."

 

Lexa pulled away so Clarke could take her nightgown off. Lexa groaned when she realized that Clarke wasn't wearing a bra.

  
  
Clarke leaned up to kiss her and Lexa let her. Clarke pulled her bottom lip in her mouth, before Lexa slid her tongue in her mouth.

 

"Can I leave one here or-"

  
  
"Yes." Clarke cut her off. Lexa let out a little chuckle, leaning down to take a nipple in her mouth.

 

Lexa sucked her nipple in her mouth, massaging her other breasts in her hand. Clarke whined underneath her when Lexa bit down.

  
  
"Fuck." Clarke moaned breathlessly.

  
  
Lexa's chest was heaving, and her pants were getting tighter. She knew she was already hard, this whole thing was turning her on.

 

Lexa rocked into Clarke while sucking a hickey into her breasts. When Clarke clawed at her shirt, Lexa quickly pulled it over her head.

 

“Your pants too.” Clarke moaned. Lexa nodded, pulling her pants off, followed by her boxers.

 

“Can I touch you?” Lexa asked, looking down at Clarke's underwear.

 

“Of course.” Clarke sighed.

 

Lexa smiled, leaning down to kiss her as her hands traveled down Clarke's body. Complete desire took over as Lexa licked and kissed every inch of skin she could.

 

Lexa moaned when her hands slipped into Clarke's underwear. Clarke was dripping wet. Lexa slid her fingers through slick wetness before circling her clit.

  
  
Clarke tightened her hold on her as Lexa rubbed slow circles around her clit. Clarke let out a tiny moan when Lexa's lips smashed against hers again.

  
  
"This feels so good, but I want your dick." Clarke mumbled against her mouth.

  
  
Lexa swallowed hard before taking Clarke's underwear off. She leaned back down to kiss her before guiding her dick inside.

  
  
Lexa watched Clarke's face scrunch up in pleasure as she bottomed out in her.

  
  
"Oh, my god." Clarke moaned when Lexa was all the way in. Lexa bit her lip as her dick was surround by wet heat. Clarke was so tight around her, it felt amazing.

 

“You can start moving.” Clarke groaned.

 

Lexa spread Clarke's legs apart, holding them by the ankles. Clarke was spread wide before her as Lexa pulled out slowly.

 

They both moaned loudly when Lexa pushed back in. Lexa started a steady rhythm of thrusting inside Clarke. Lexa pinned one of Clarke's leg down to the bed, making her slide deeper in.

 

“Oh, _yes_.” Clarke moaned, throwing her head back. Lexa grunted, she had a death grip on Clarke's other leg.

 

It wasn't long before Lexa started to pick up the pace. Neither one of them wanted to go slow. Lexa plowed into Clarke with ease, Clarke's moans increasing by the minute. Lexa’s stomach tightened at hearing her raspy moans. It was a sound she never wanted to forget.

 

 _“Clarke."_ Lexa moaned, thrusting deep inside her. Clarke's mouth hung open as Lexa leaned down to take a nipple in her mouth. She sucked hard on it while Clarke wrapped a hand around her neck.

 

Lexa could feel Clarke clenching around her and bit her lip. Clarke leaned up to connected their lips briefly before pulling back with a throaty moan.

 

“ _Uhh_.” Clarke moaned loudly.

 

Lexa couldn't believe that she was on top of Clarke right now. She had no idea when they’d get the chance again or if they would. Lexa was enjoying every minute and by the deep moans Clarke was letting out, so was she.

 

Lexa abruptly slowed her thrusts down before tapping on Clarke's hips.

 

“Turn around.” Lexa instructed.

 

Clarke smiled darkly before slowly turning around and getting on all fours. Lexa ran her tongue through her folds, groaning the whole time. Lexa ran the pads of her fingers around her clit before lining herself up with Clarke's entrance. Clarke gasped loudly once Lexa sunk in again.

  
  
Lexa didn't waste any time, immediately drilling her hips into her.

 

"You're so hot." Lexa grunted out. She had a death grip on her hips and Clarke's butt bounced with every thrust.

 

“You're so big!” Clarke whined.

 

Lexa reached out tentatively, grabbing a hold of Clarke's hair. Clarke leaned back into her realizing what Lexa wanted.

 

Lexa grabbed a fistful of Clarke's hair and yanked.

 

"Oh, fuck. _Lexa!_ " Clarke said around a high pitched moan. Lexa moaned loudly pumping her hips fast inside Clarke.

  
  
" _Uhh_. Just like that." Clarke said breathlessly.

  
  
"So. Hot." Lexa grunted. She felt Clarke repeatedly clench around her and knew she was close.

 

Lexa reached down with her other hand landing a loud smack to Clarke's butt. Clarke cried out, begging her to do it again. Lexa didn't need to be told twice. She smirked before repeatedly smacking Clarke's butt.

 

“Oh, god!” Clarke groaned clenching the bed sheets.

 

Clarke was losing it beneath her and Lexa was loving it. She drilled her dick in deep enjoying Clarke's moans and the way the bed shook and groaned beneath them.

 

Lexa squeezed Clarke's butt softly patting it before letting go of her hair.

 

Clarke came with a long, strangled moan, freezing beneath her. Lexa helped her ride out her orgasm by slowly thrusting in her and rubbing tight circles around her clit. When she finished, Lexa pulled out.

  
  
Clarke turned around, bringing Lexa in for a kiss. They nipped and bit at each other lips before Clarke pushed down on Lexa's chest. Lexa laid down as Clarke straddled her.

 

Clarke leaned down groping Lexa's breast, before taking the other in the mouth. Clarke licked and sucked her breast, lapping her tongue over the nipple. She pulled back with a smirk, before grabbing a hold of Lexa's dick.

  
  
They locked eyes, staring at each other intensely. Clarke slowly sunk down on her and Lexa's mouth dropped open. Words couldn't describe how good she felt.

 

Clarke stayed still once Lexa was buried all the way in. She sat up before she started bouncing up and down.

  
  
"Shit!" Lexa groaned once Clarke started moving. The blonde grabbed a hold of her own boobs, moving up and down on Lexa. She rocked her hips into her repeatedly.

  
  
Lexa's hands trailed all around while Clarke worked her dick. Lexa knew she wasn't going to last a minute longer. She planted her feet on the bed, thrusting up into Clarke.

  
  
Clarke scrunched her face up as her movements faltered. Lexa didn't stop though. She kept pounding into Clarke from underneath because she could feel her orgasm nearing.

  
  
"Fuck. _Fuck_." Lexa groaned over and over. It only took a few more thrust for Lexa to quickly pull out.

  
  
Clarke crawled down immediately jerking her off. Lexa's hips humped Clarke's hand until she came. Lexa moaned as each spurt came out and into Clarke's mouth.

  
  
Lexa looked down at Clarke in awe as she swallowed her load.

 

When Clarke milked Lexa dry, they leaned in for a kiss. They kissed with absolute hunger, biting each other lips and their teeth clashed against each other.

 

Lexa held onto Clarke tight as they kissed. She was getting ready to taste herself on Clarke's tongue, when they were interrupted by a buzz.

 

Lexa quickly pulled away, leaning down and checking her phone.

 

“Shit! It's Charlotte.” Lexa said.

 

“Answer it.” Clarke rasped, her chest rising and falling rapidly.

 

Lexa quickly pulled on some clothes, before answering the call.

 

“Hey, Charlotte.” Lexa tried to sound as casual as she could.

 

“Hey, Lex. Gracie just wanted to say goodnight.” Charlotte’s cheery voice rang through the phone.

 

“Of course.” Lexa responded.

 

“Hi mowwy!” Gracie said happily. Lexa sighed at hearing her daughter's voice. A part of her felt guilty because of the position she was in.

 

“Hey, baby girl.” Lexa cooed. She tried not to look back at the naked girl in bed.

 

“Char says it's nighty night time.” Gracie said.

 

“It is, baby girl. I hope you sleep well and mommy will be there in the morning. I love you.” Lexa said.

 

“Wuv you.” Gracie said before Charlotte said her goodbyes.

 

Lexa quickly hung up, before looking back at Clarke. She was laying down with her head propped in her hand.

 

She patted the spot beside her slowly and Lexa obeyed. She crawled back in bed before laying down.

 

“I guess I should get dressed too.” Clarke rasped.

 

Lexa thought about it for a minute before shaking her head.

 

“Or I could go down on you.” Lexa suggested.

 

Clarke already had her legs opened wide, motioning for Lexa to come between them.

 

“I would love nothing more.” Clarke said pulling Lexa in for a kiss before pushing her head down.

* * *

 

They collapsed on the bed an hour later, completely sweaty and chests heaving. What was suppose to be Lexa going down on Clarke, turned into sex again.

 

Lexa was scared that she couldn't control herself around Clarke. She couldn't stop herself from coming back for more. Lexa reveled in every moan and whimper that fell out of Clarke's mouth. Lexa couldn't stop her moans to save a life.

 

They both cuddled up to each other naked. Lexa was spooning Clarke from behind, and it felt great. Lexa didn't know the last time she had human contact like this. Clarke snuggled deep into her arms and it wasn't long before they both fell asleep.

* * *

 

Lexa woke up to someone nudging her. She groaned, getting ready to tell Gracie five more minutes, when she realized Gracie wasn't with her. Lexa quickly popped her eyes opened at the realization.

 

She was towering over her, with her golden hair cascading down her shoulders. Her blues eyes were piercing into Lexa's green ones. She was dressed for the day, and Lexa slowly sat up.

 

“Good morning.” Clarke purred, sitting down beside Lexa.

 

Lexa smiled when Clarke leaned in to kiss her. Lexa kissed her back for a minute before pulling away.

 

“I made you breakfast.” Clarke said, bending down to pick a tray up.

 

Clarke had made pancakes, fruit and eggs. It looked absolutely delicious. Lexa offered her a smile as Clarke wordlessly handed over the tray.

 

“Is it weird that I made you breakfast in bed? I know I needed to wake you up because you have to pick Gracie up soon.” Clarke asked.

 

“No, not at all. It's greatly appreciated because I'm hungry. Thanks for waking me.” Lexa said. She rubbed her hands up and down Clarke's thigh, before digging in to eat.

 

Clarke cleaned up around her room, while Lexa ate breakfast naked. Her clothes were still in a pile on the floor.

 

“What are you doing today?” Lexa asked, cutting up her pancakes.

 

“I don't know yet. I do have a wedding session tomorrow.” Clarke answered. She was folding away some of Finn’s clothes.

 

Lexa pressed her lips into a thin line, being reminded that what she was doing was wrong.

 

Lexa tried to force down the guilt and instead just eat. When she finished, she got dressed.

 

“Well, I should go.”

 

Clarke looked over with a frown.

 

“Oh, okay.”

 

Lexa parted her lips, getting ready to respond when her phone went off. Charlotte texting her saying that Gracie kept asking for her.

 

“I need to go get Gracie.” Lexa informed the blonde, who was still frowning.

 

“Okay. Have fun.” Clarke said indifferently. Lexa nodded awkwardly as they made their way downstairs.

 

“I guess I'll call you later?” Lexa asked.

 

“Yeah, of course.” Clarke answered bringing Lexa in for an earth shattering kiss, even managing to slip her tongue in. Lexa gaped at Clarke when they pulled away, that was just mean. How was Lexa supposed to leave with a goodbye kiss like that?

 

Clarke was smirking the whole time because she knew exactly what she did.

 

“I'll see you soon.” Lexa said lowly.

 

“I sure hope so.” Clarke flirted.

 

“Bye.”

 

“Bye.” Clarke said with a wave, watching Lexa leave.

* * *

 

It was Thursday evening and Lexa was currently playing hide n seek with Gracie. She was counting and Lexa raced to find a spot. She only had five seconds to hide because Gracie could only count to five.

 

Lexa settled for hiding under the dinner table. Lexa thought there was a huge disadvantage to playing this game. Gracie had more time to hide and was smaller than her. Lexa squeezed under the dinner table as best she could, but that didn't stop the little pitter, patter of Gracie's shoes against the hardwood.

 

Lexa held her breath hoping not to get caught. She smirked when her daughter went past her, to the pantry. Gracie opened that first before checking the closet.

 

“Mowwy!” Gracie called. Lexa smirked because she remembered when she used to fall for that. She didn't anymore.

 

Lexa stayed silent as Gracie walked around the kitchen, before stopping. Lexa cursed mentally because she knew she was found.

 

“I fond you!” Gracie squealed, crawling on the ground to her mom.

 

Lexa laughed wholeheartedly before getting out from under the table. She scooped Gracie up in her arms, twirling her around.

 

“You did! What do you want for dinner? Mac and cheese? Spaghetti?” Lexa asked, placing sloppy kisses to her daughter's cheeks.

 

“Mac and cweese!” Gracie said excitedly. Lexa wasn't all that surprised. Her daughter would probably live off it if she could.

 

“Alright. She has spoken,” Lexa joked. “Why don't you-” Lexa was interrupted when the doorbell went off.

 

Lexa frowned because she hadn't been expecting anyone. She propped Gracie on her hip, going to answer the door.

 

The last thing Lexa expected was Clarke to be standing before her.

 

Clarke's hair was up in a bun. She was wearing make up with a black skirt and blue blouse. She was holding a pan in her hands, and it smelled delicious.

 

“Homemade lasagna and garlic bread at your service!” She exclaimed with a wide grin.

 

Lexa spluttered, but grinned as well. Lexa's eyes flicked to Clarke's, who was looking at her softly. They shared another soft smile before Gracie interrupted them.

 

“Cwarke!” Gracie squeaked, reaching for the woman.

 

Lexa quickly ushered Clarke to come inside. She wanted to make some form of contact her, but decided not in front of her daughter.

 

“Thank you for this, really. I was just about to put on a pot of Mac and cheese for her.” Lexa handed over Gracie, who was practically already out of her arms.

 

Clarke smiled as Gracie nuzzled into her. Lexa tried not to get emotional about the scene in front of her, but it was pulling her heartstrings. Gracie was getting hooked on Clarke, and she wasn't the only one.

 

“It's not a problem! I wanted to see you guys, so.. I thought I would take a risk. You know, seize the day.” Clarke said proudly, putting Gracie in her highchair so she could eat.

 

“You're learning.” Lexa hummed with a proud smile.

 

“I might. I haven't lived in the moment in a long time. I'm sorry if I caught you by surprise.” Clarke apologized.

 

“It's completely fine. You saved me from having to cook.” Lexa joked, still trying to recover from Clarke showing up.

 

“Well, I'm glad.”

 

They shared a warm smile before Lexa made Gracie’s plate then hers. She poured juice for Gracie while getting two beers out for them.

 

Lexa had spent the whole day, playing whatever Gracie wanted. She had a busy week of work ahead of her, and wanted to spend as much time with her daughter as possible. She had no idea that Clarke was planning to come over because she hadn't contacted her.

 

Lexa almost pushed Clarke when she sat down in Costia’s spot. Lexa looked at her in shock. That spot hadn't been used in years, and Clarke so readily made herself comfortable. Lexa didn't want to make a big deal of it, but her vision got blurry.

 

“Lexa?” Clarke asked warily.

 

Lexa blinked and nodded, “I'm okay. I'm okay,” Lexa said sitting down. She cut up Gracie's food so she could feed her. “I'm just really glad you're here.”

 

“I'm glad I'm here too.” Clarke said with a small smile.

 

Lexa was right.

 

Clarke did look amazing sitting at the dinner table with them. They were almost like a family.

 

The thought made Lexa smile the whole evening.


	11. Chapter 11

Lexa knew Clarke just showing up at her door unannounced, was opening the door for them to hang out more. Just like she’d done the day before.

  
  
Clarke was suddenly just there all the time, not that Lexa minded. She enjoyed being around the blonde, probably more than she should considering their circumstances. They were two entirely different people, but found themselves in each other's company over and over again.

  
  
The whole week Finn was gone, Clarke was over at her house. She even made them a whole week's supply of dinner, bringing one over every night.

  
  
Lexa wasn't surprised that she kept letting Clarke in. She wanted her there, but that didn't mean her friends didn't start to question her.

 

"So," Anya drawled out. "Wanna tell me why you’re so cheery all the time now?"

 

Lexa continued to stare at her schedule for the next few days. She was booked, and didn't know when she could see the blonde again.

  
  
They’d kept things light in front of Gracie, although she wouldn’t have any idea what was going on.

  
  
They would have hot make out sessions before Clarke had to go or Finn called her.

 

“I'm always cheery.” Lexa hummed. Anya made a disapproving sound. Lexa gaped at her, dropping her mouth open in shock.

 

“I am!” Lexa protested.

 

“Yeah, but this is different. Like a certain someone is in the picture.” Anya said slowly.

 

Lexa's heart rate started to increase. There was no way Anya was on to her, because Clarke hadn't come by the shop since their post hook up.

 

“I don't know what you’re talking about. There isn't anyone.” Lexa said with as much conviction as she could.

 

“Do you want to hang out this weekend? Your friends miss you and your little munchkin.” Anya said after a minute.

 

It had been a while since they all gotten together, but it helped that they all worked together. Lexa didn't know what Clarke was doing this weekend. She knew Finn would be back in the picture now, and clenched her jaw at the thought.

 

“Okay, sure.” Lexa answered.

 

“Bring the mysterious girl.” Anya instructed. Her tone leaving no room for Lexa to argue.

 

“Anya..”

 

“Bring her.” Anya said through gritted teeth making Lexa roll her eyes.

 

“There's something you need to know.” Lexa said, closing her book and getting up. Anya knew to follow her, even though she had a questioning look in her eyes.

 

Lexa closed her office door before turning around to face Anya.

 

“It's Clarke.” Lexa admitted quietly.

 

“Clarke? The blonde with attitude?” Lexa smirked despite herself.

 

“That would be her.”

 

“I don't understand why you needed to tell me behind closed doors.” Anya said confused.

 

“There's something else I need to tell you.” Lexa said. Anya was the only one Lexa would admit that she was truly scared of. Not that she would ever admit it out loud.

 

“Out with it!” Anya hissed.

 

“She's engaged.” Lexa whispered.

 

Anya blew out a breath, realizing what Lexa was saying.

 

“So, you're sleeping with a married woman?” Anya barked out a laugh.

 

“She's not married yet.”

 

“She’ll be fucking married, no matter what the timeline is. What the hell is wrong with you? You were married. Why the hell are you doing this?”

 

Lexa could make up a million excuses why she was doing this, but none of them would calm Anya down. Lexa knew this, so she didn't say anything.

 

“She's not coming to the dinner.” Anya said, glaring at Lexa.

 

“You can't dictate that.”

 

“She's been around Gracie? You let that woman around her? She's going to ruin both of you.” Anya hissed again.

 

Lexa glared at Anya. Her words hitting home. She knew that Clarke had the potential to completely destroy her. Lexa didn't know if that was a good thing or bad thing.

 

“She's coming.” Lexa said firmly. She watched in horror as Anya's eyes lit up.

 

“Yes,” Anya said with a smirk. “She can come.”

 

“Anya,” Lexa threatened. “You better play nice.”

 

“You shouldn't have told me she's engaged. I'm not going to back down now. I also can't tell you where to stick it.” Anya shrugged. Lexa winced at Anya's blunt words.

 

“I still have to see if she can even come.” Lexa said weakly.

 

“I'm sure she will.” Anya sassed before turning around and leaving.

 

Lexa wanted to ask Clarke right away, but knew she had a client in a couple minutes. Lexa sighed before heading out the door.

* * *

 

“What are you doing Friday night?” Lexa asked once she finally had a free moment. She smiled hearing Clarke's voice float through the phone. It was a quiet Wednesday night and Gracie was asleep in her room.

 

“I'm not sure yet. I was going to hang out with Raven, but she's busy.” Clarke answered.

 

“Well,” Lexa said hesitantly. “You could come to a dinner with me and my friends.”

 

“Oh, really?” Clarke hummed delighted.

 

Lexa should've warned Clarke about Anya, but as long as Lexa was there, she knew Anya wouldn't try anything.

 

She was sadly mistaken.

 

“Yeah, only if you're free.” Lexa answered.

 

“I will be. Finn will be out with his co-workers. I'd love to come. I'll text you when I'm ready. Will Gracie be joining us?”  

 

“She will.”

 

“Fantastic. I'll see you on Friday.” Clarke said. Lexa chuckled at her enthusiasm, but was glad she was excited to meet her friends.

 

“See you Friday.”

* * *

 

It was finally Friday evening and Lexa waited outside for Clarke to get ready. Clarke texted her saying she already was. Lexa had no idea what she was doing. She impatiently tapped her hands against the steering wheel. She glared at the front door wondering what was taking so long.

 

Costia had never taken long to get ready. She was an in the moment kind of gal. So was Lexa. That was why they’d clicked so well. Lexa rarely had to wait on Costia to get ready.

 

Lexa huffed out a breath. She knew they were already late, and having to wait for Clarke to do god knows what was making them even later. She knew Anya wasn't going to like it.

 

Lexa sighed in relief when the front door finally flew open. All of Lexa's frustrations went out the door when she saw Clarke.

 

Her hair bounced with every step. She was wearing a navy blue dress that hugged her curves perfectly. Lexa could hear the tap of her heels on the pavement, even from inside the car.

 

Lexa quickly got out the car once Clarke neared.

 

“What took you so long?” Lexa asked exasperatedly. “You said you were ready.”

 

“I was,” Clarke hummed in response, a smirk playing at her lips. “I was going to go casual, but figured I should wear what I always wear. I know how you like me in a dress. Plus I had to straighten my hair.”

 

“You're just meeting my friends. You could've gone casual.”

 

“So, you don't like the dress?” Clarke asked when Lexa opened her door.

 

“I do,” Lexa ran her eyes appreciatively over Clarke's body. It was like the dress was calling for her to rip it off. Clarke smirked because she somehow sensed Lexa's thoughts. “You look amazing.”

 

“Thank you.”

 

Lexa almost tripped over her feet with the kiss Clarke placed to her cheek.

 

Gracie squealed happily once Clarke got in the car.

 

“Cwarke!”

 

“Hey, Gracie!” Clarke craned her neck to look back her. She offered her a little wave and got a toothy smile in response.

 

Lexa put the car in drive before turning the radio up. She smiled when her song came on, but it dropped quickly once Clarke spoke.

 

“What is this nonsense you have me listening to?” Clarke grimaced at the music playing throughout the car.

 

If Lexa didn't love her daughter for everything she was, she would've crashed the car.

 

“Please,” Lexa stressed the word. “Please, tell me you're joking. _Please_.”

 

Lexa knew Clarke wasn't which made her have heart malfunctions.

 

“What is this ruckus?” Clarke gestured towards the radio. Lexa wanted to cry at the lack of knowledge.

 

“You may be CEO, but your lack in knowledge of music is absolutely sickening.” Lexa said.

 

An offended glare was thrown her way.

 

“Excuse you.”

 

“Nirvana.” Lexa stated. The blank look on Clarke's face made Lexa shake her head in shame.

 

“Smells like teen spirit. You have to know this song. Everyone knows it!” Lexa exclaimed. “Gracie and I jam out to it all the time.”

 

Lexa didn't miss the smile that Clarke had. It almost made Lexa want to forgive Clarke for her lack of music taste.

 

“I don't.” Clarke retorted.

 

“What have you been doing all your life?”

 

“I'm more of a smooth jazz or just soft music in general.” Clarke answered.

 

“This is just sad. I'm going to need to show you actual music one day.” Lexa said.

 

“My smooth jazz is just fine. This ruckus is giving me a headache.”

 

“Oh, please,” Lexa clutched at her heart. “You're causing me heart problems.”

 

“I'm sorry.” Clarke said, reaching out to place a hand on Lexa's arm. They both jumped at the contact. An electric shock ran through Lexa's body at how warm Clarke's hand was.

 

Clarke cleared her throat before removing her hand. Lexa took a glance back at Gracie, who was drifting off to sleep.

 

“Anyways, there's a couple things you should be aware of.” Lexa shot Clarke a warning look.

 

“Oh, god.” Those words always sounded heavenly falling from the blonde’s lips, but this time it was in horror. Lexa eased her worries. Well, slightly.

 

“It's just my best friend, Anya. She knows and I'm sorry. I cracked under pressure. She gives me this look and I- I'm _weak_.”

 

“Wow.” Clarke smirked.

 

“She's probably going to give you the death glare all night. I would just stay clear of her. My other friends don't know about us.”

 

“What exactly have you told her? I won't be mad by the answer.” Clarke asked.

 

“That you're getting married and we've been… sleeping together.” Lexa said fumbling over her words.

 

“I see.” Clarke pressed her lips in a thin smile. A sign of disappointment.

 

“I'm sorry. I know I shouldn't have-”

 

“It's okay. I can handle whatever she throws at me. Although, I wasn't prepared.”

 

_“I'm sorry.”_

 

“It's fine, Lexa.”

 

They pulled up to the small Italian restaurant that was the local favorite. Lexa hoped the night went smoothly.

* * *

 

Lexa carried Gracie inside who was still waking up from the short nap she had. Clarke was by her side as they shuffled through the doors.

 

Lexa spotted Anya immediately and went over to the table in the back.

 

“There's my baby!” Anya cooed getting up from her seat. Gracie smiled at Anya and reached for her.

 

“How's my babe?” Anya showered kisses to Gracie's cheek. Gracie giggled under the attack.

 

“Gwood.” Gracie said.

 

Anya handed her back to Lexa so they could sit down. Lexa didn't miss the way Anya squinted her eyes at Clarke. Clarke didn't miss it either, squinting right back. Lexa cleared her throat awkwardly. She knew this dinner wasn't going to go well.

 

There were three spots missing in the large table. Lexa was going to pull Clarke's chair out for her, but thought otherwise with all the stares.

 

Lexa glared at Jasper and Monty who were practically undressing Clarke with their eyes. It’d been awhile since she saw them, and was happy they were here, but they needed to keep their eyes to themselves.

 

“Wow.” Jasper muttered.

 

Clarke hardly seemed affected by the gawking eyes. Octavia and Lincoln smiled brightly at her, while Anya threw daggers.

 

“Hello. Sorry we're late," Lexa said upon sitting down. “This is Clarke.” She introduced to the two boys who were still gaping at her. Clarke finally noticed and Lexa almost growled at the smirk she threw them.

 

“Hello, boys.” Clarke purred with a charming smile, it even made Lincoln blush.

 

“Hi.” They both greeted stumbling over such a simple two letter word.

 

Lexa decided to sit next to Clarke just in case she couldn't fight off Anya. Lexa knew the girl was preparing her attack with the way her jaw clenched repeatedly.

 

Lexa just hoped Clarke had enough armor to fight her off.

 

“So, what do you do?” Monty asked with a shy smile.

 

“I'm CEO of Skai corporations. It's a healthcare organization.” Clarke announced proudly, showing off with a sly smile.

 

Monty’s eyes widened.

 

“That's impressive.” Jasper spoke before Monty could.

 

“Well, thank you.” Clarke nodded to them. She cleared her throat before opening the menu.

 

Lexa followed suit, while Gracie colored in her kid menu. It wasn't long before Anya finally made her move.

 

“So, how's the wedding planning coming?” Anya asked.

 

Clarke raised an eyebrow at the question, waiting a moment before answering.

 

“It's coming along just fine. Thanks for asking.” Clarke said with a overly radiant smile.

 

Anya glared at the smile she threw her. Lexa saw that Anya was getting ready to attack again, but thankfully the waiter interrupted them.

 

After everyone took their turns ordering and the waiter collected all the menus, Octavia spoke up.

 

“You're getting married?” Octavia asked, surprise evident in her voice.

 

“I am.” Clarke said.

 

Octavia flicked her eyes to Lexa before moving back to Clarke. The brunette didn't say anything before throwing a smile her way.

 

“Well, that's exciting!” Octavia praised.

 

Lexa didn't miss the fake smile Clarke flashed her. Although it looked real to everyone at the table, Lexa knew Clarke was putting on a show.

 

Everyone seemed to buy it. All, but one.

 

“Doesn't seem like you're too excited.” Anya pointed out.

 

This time, and much to Lexa's apparent surprise, Clarke glared at Anya.

 

“I don't have to be jumping over the moon just to show my excitement.” Clarke hissed.

 

Monty and Jasper's eyes went wide. Octavia and Lincoln stifled their laughter. And Anya… she looked shocked at the comment.

 

Clarke won that round and Lexa nervously took gulps of water.

 

Anya backed down after that, which Lexa was grateful for.

 

“It's not everyday Lexa brings someone to dinner, so you must be special.” Jasper said. It was such a simple comment to any normal bystander, but Lexa knew the threat that shined in his eyes.

 

Lexa almost missed his lustful gaze.

 

But, he had no idea. Special didn't even describe Clarke, but Lexa wouldn't get into that right now.

 

“Well, I guess I am.” Clarke muttered shooting Lexa a look she couldn't make out.

 

“Cwarke!” Gracie spoke up. Lexa sighed in absolute relief, glad her daughter interrupted the tension around the table.

 

Clarke immediately reached for Gracie, apparently wanting a distraction too. Anya watched with wide eyes as Gracie cuddled up with Clarke in her chair.

 

It was hitting home. Lexa knew that. Everyone loved Costia and missed her. Lexa wasn't trying to replace Costia at all. Her daughter fit in Clarke's lap. She looked content, and her friends watched with dumbfounded looks.

 

Lexa didn't have any words to explain what was happening. Gracie loved Clarke and Lexa wasn't going to keep Clarke from Gracie.

 

“So, what's going to happen when you get married?” Anya asked.

 

Clarke ran her hands through Gracie's curls. Lexa could almost hear the rumble of a growl that threatened to escape her lips and show who the real beast was.

 

Clarke stayed calm, but Lexa was sure she was screaming internally.  

 

“I'm sorry. I don't understand what you mean.” Clarke's voice was dripping with sarcasm, and Lexa didn't like where this was going.

 

“Well, you're going to get married soon, and seeing as how you are fu-”

 

“Anya!” Lexa roared, finally having enough. She caught the attention of innocent families trying to enjoy their meals, but Anya was taking it too far. “Bathroom, now!” She hissed.

 

Anya shot Clarke another warning look before complying. She got up, heading towards the bathroom with Lexa hot on her heels.

 

“You've got to stop!” Lexa sneered once they were alone.

 

“What?” Anya asked innocently. “I'm just asking simple questions.”

 

“You are starting a war is what you're doing and you know it!” Lexa said.

 

“She's messing with the wrong one. You're my best friend and I'll protect you the best way I can. I promised her that.”

 

“I know you did," Lexa said quietly with a sad smile on her face. "But you have no idea what's going on.”

 

“You're apparently fucking her. I don't need the whole story. She's getting married!” Anya roared, her eyes widening in anger.

 

“And you think I don't know that?” Lexa asked placing her hands on her hips. “I know exactly what I'm doing.”

 

“Do you? You're sleeping with someone else’s girl. I don't even know who you are anymore.”

 

Those words stung coming from her best friend of years. Lexa clenched her jaw, masking her hurt.

 

“Do you love her?” Anya asked. Lexa exhaled at that question.

 

“Would that make a difference?” Lexa snorted sadly.

 

“I just want to know why her? She doesn't fit into our friend group.”

 

“Octavia and Lincoln are trying to make her feel comfortable. Why can't you?”

 

“Because she has the complete and utter power to destroy you when you're barely back on your feet!” Anya's voice was high and full of emotion.

 

Lexa backed herself against the wall, feeling every word that Anya uttered. She hadn't thought about what she was doing with Clarke, she just did it. She knew they weren't anything, and didn't know if they would ever be anything more.

 

Lexa didn't end up with a woman like Clarke. That wasn't how the world worked.

 

“I'm not saying she's too good for you, but she isn't the type of girl you’d normally go after. She holds her head high like she's the queen of the world. She's prissy and high maintenance. A complete bit-”

 

“Don't finish that.” Lexa scolded, anger dripping in her words.

 

“Oh, yes because you're so blinded by her vagina.” Anya rolled her eyes.

 

Lexa didn't want to think about what she was doing with Clarke anymore. So, she wrapped up the conversation.

 

“Just promise me we'll get through dinner without me having to play referee.” Lexa said firmly.

 

Anya sighed, long and hard. She gritted her teeth, but obeyed.

 

“Fine.” She huffed, not letting Lexa say anymore before turning on her heel and leaving.

* * *

 

Dinner went smoothly after that. Anya had been quiet the whole time. The mood was tense between the adults. No one knew what they should talk about. Everyone kept looking back and forth between Clarke and Lexa, questions shining bright in their eyes.

 

Lexa knew Anya had said too much.

 

Gracie was nodding off after her meal and rested in Clarke's lap until it was time for them to leave.

 

Everyone said their farewells. Octavia brought Lexa in for a hug, nodding her goodbye to Clarke.

 

Lincoln hugged Lexa too, before whispering in her ear.

 

“We’re going to talk about this later.” He muttered.

 

Lexa sighed. She should've stopped Anya sooner.

 

Octavia and Lincoln placed kisses to Gracie's forehead, she was out for the night on Clarke's shoulder.

 

Jasper and Monty lingered when they said goodbye to Clarke. No matter how protective they were over Lexa, they couldn't get over how attractive the woman was.

 

Lexa had to pry them off of her when they pulled her in for a hug.

 

“Watch out for my daughter,” Lexa hissed, pushing them off Clarke. “Get lost, boys. I'll see you later.”

 

They offered Clarke another charming smile before finally heading to their cars.

 

“You're friends were lovely.” Clarke flashed her a smile. Lexa had no idea if she was being serious or not.

 

Lexa gently took Gracie for Clarke, buckling her into her car seat.

 

“I'm sorry.” Lexa said closing the car door.

 

“You gave me a heads up which I was extremely grateful for.”

 

“You held your ground.” Lexa hummed in awe, opening Clarke's door.

 

Lexa quickly rounded the car before getting in.

 

“I guess I did.” Clarke shrugged.

 

“I'm sorry.” Lexa said again.

 

“Stop apologizing.” Clarke demanded softly.

 

Lexa nodded before starting the car.

 

“You really haven't been with anyone since...?” Clarke trailed off.

 

“Yes.” Lexa answered.

 

Clarke blew out a breath.

 

“I'm the first girl you.. since…” Clarke trailed off again.

 

“Yes.” Lexa answered again, her grip tight around the steering wheel when she pulled up to Clarke’s house.

 

Lexa saw that Clarke was getting ready to open the door when she placed a hand on her forearm.

 

Clarke looked back at her with a mischievous glint in her eyes, but waited for Lexa to make the first move.

 

“Gracie’s sleeping and it's dark outside. I was just wondering if maybe… I don't know when I'll get to see you again and I was wondering if I could…” Lexa was doing a horrible job of explaining to Clarke that she wanted to kiss her.

 

Clarke smirked at her before pulling her in. Clarke planted a sweet kiss to Lexa's lips, that Lexa quickly turned dirty. She couldn't help the way her tongue sought out comfort with Clarke's. Lexa couldn't help the moan that came tumbling out of her mouth when Clarke collided her tongue with hers.

 

Lexa had no idea what she was doing with Clarke. She was such an elegant woman who knew how to stick up for herself. Lexa smirked because she had this well put together woman moaning all over the bed twice already and couldn’t wait to do it again.

 

Lexa knew she needed to pull away, but couldn't help her tongue grazing against Clarke's once more.

 

Lexa squeezed Clarke's arm, before pulling away.

 

“Wow.” Clarke whispered between her lips.

 

“Some goodnight kiss, huh?” Lexa asked before pulling away from Clarke's warmth.

 

“Hopefully, I'll see you soon.” Clarke said.

 

Lexa hummed in agreement. She had no idea when she would be able to see the blonde again. She hoped it was soon.

 

“Yeah. If not, call me.” Lexa waved. “Bye.”

 

Clarke waved back before gathering her stuff and leaving. Lexa smiled to herself watching Clarke walk inside.

 

She quietly drove home and made sure to miss all the potholes so her baby girl could sleep peacefully.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for those of you who got a notification saying that chapter 12 got updated. I did update it, but took it down because it wasn't showing up in the clexa works and because I wasn't happy with it.
> 
> This chapter is a huge turning point in the story and a lot of things are getting ready to happen. I wanted to make it better than what it was and I'm finally happy with it.
> 
> I incorporated some of the title in this chapter. This chapter is the reason I named it: With You, Went None of Me, so I hope you enjoy!

 

* * *

 

Clarke sighed with relief getting out of the car. The whole car ride had been nothing but tense silence, when they were supposed to be doing something exciting for their wedding planning. She had a few minutes to gather herself before Finn rounded the car and stood next to her.

 

She grimaced when his rough hand slipped into hers, but forced her face to resolve into something similar to admiration.

 

They leaned against their Mini Cooper and waited for Jennifer to show. They were taking a look at Clarke's top two wedding venues.

 

Finn wanted an outside wedding and Clarke didn't. It was the one big thing they fought about most, when it came to the wedding. Before Clarke could dwell on it anymore, she saw Jennifer pull up.

 

“Alright! Are we ready to look at some wedding venues?” Jennifer asked in excitement while walking up to them.

 

“We are!” Clarke answered for the both of them. When Clarke noticed Finn’s slight frown, she nudged him and he smiled.

 

“We sure are!” Finn said with fake enthusiasm. Jennifer hadn’t seemed to catch on to the tension and lead them both inside.

 

It was a half hour drive out to the Historic Rucker place, but it had made its way to Clarke's top two. Clarke wasn't all that thrilled to be looking at this place. It was beautiful, but Clarke already knew where she wanted to get married. She'd decided to throw it in, for Finn’s sake.

 

It was a modern looking house. It had a sidewalk leading up to the steps with trimmed grass and beautiful flowers lining the walkway.

 

They all shook hands with the owner before he showed them around. Clarke did her best to hide her frown. She liked it, it was basically a house, but the ceremony would be taking place outside, and she didn't want that at all. It won Finn over though as he had a little more pep in his step, while Clarke was dragging her feet.

 

There was a nice open room with tables scattered around for the wedding reception. Clarke tried listening to the owner explain how many weddings had taken place here. She didn't care, and was ready for the next place.

 

Clarke breathed a bit easier when they drove to the next one on the list. This was her number one. The wedding would be taking place inside, and Clarke was thrilled about it. She practically had to drag Finn inside.

 

Clarke was star struck when they walked up to the small brick building. They were at Woodrow Hall, and it was close to their house.

 

It was spacious, with a long table inside one of the rooms where the reception would be taking place. Clarke loved that the whole place was made up of brick on the inside as well.

 

There was a little stage where they would stand to exchange their vows, with tons of seating for their guests.

 

Clarke was in love with this place. She noticed Finn wasn't excited about this place, and knew they weren't going to see eye to eye on this.

 

“So, what do we think?” Jennifer asked, once the owner was out of earshot.

 

“I liked the other one better.” Finn said.

 

“I love this one.” Clarke spoke over Finn.

 

Jennifer looked between the two warily before writing something down.

 

“Are we done for today?” Jennifer asked. “You two have a decision to make. Just let me know.”

 

“Yeah, we’re done.” Clarke nodded.

 

They thanked the owner before leaving. They said goodbye to Jennifer before heading their separate ways.

 

“It'll be a little cool out in October.” Finn muttered focusing on the road.

 

“That doesn't make up for the fact that it's outside.” Clarke said.

 

“You have stupid tree branches on you, but you don't want to have an outdoor wedding. That makes so much sense.”

 

“I'm so sick of you and my mom making comments about my tattoo.” Clarke huffed.

 

“I just don't know why you would do that!” Finn defended himself.

 

“Well, you need to get over it because it's not going away.” Clarke grunted.

 

“It's gross and-”

 

“Shut up, Finn! And just drive.” Clarke practically growled, rolling her eyes and turning her body away from him.

 

Clarke was surprised he’d actually listened. He didn't mutter a single word on the ride home. The tension in the car was high, but Clarke refused to acknowledge it.

* * *

 

“What are you doing?” Clarke felt like a high schooler talking to their lover. She very well might be.

 

She had just finished planting a new flower in her garden. She had dirt smudges all over her face, and hurried to wipe them away. She wiped at the sweat that was forming on her brow before settling into the couch.

 

Finn was at the local bar for the night. It’d been a little over two weeks since Clarke had seen Lexa, and was itching to hear from her. When Clarke wasn't working, they would text back and forth consistently. Clarke would even admit she’d text Lexa during her lunch break because she missed her.

 

“I’m drawing. What about you?” Lexa's angelic voice came flowing through the line making Clarke swoon.

 

“Just finished planting a new flower. Although, I'm all dirty.” Clarke huffed in annoyance.

 

Lexa giggled in response, making Clarke's heart pound in her chest. She didn't know why she was so nervous to talk to her. Lexa had a way of doing that to her.

 

“What do you like to do? Like what are your hobbies?” Lexa asked curiously after a minute.

 

“Reading.” Clarke hummed.

 

“Besides that.”

 

Clarke frowned because she didn't have an answer. She panicked because she couldn't think of a single thing she liked to do in her free time. Finn and the wedding planning had taken up all of her time recently and she couldn’t remember the last time she did something that she enjoyed.

 

“I don't know.” Clarke whispered, though she felt like the words echoed around the whole house. She didn't even know what she liked to do.

 

“You really need to start living more.” Lexa teased, but Clarke took her words seriously. They sliced her right to the core.

 

“After Costia died, I started to become more… free. I did things I wouldn't normally do and I'm glad I did. It helped make me who I am today. Who I was three years ago and who I am now are two... _entirely_ different people,” Lexa explained. “I lived my life to the fullest with her and I don't regret anything, but I started doing more things to make me feel better once she was gone. Shouldn't life be about more than just surviving? Don't we deserve better than that?”

 

Clarke hadn't realized it, but maybe she was just surviving. She was getting by in life, not taking it for granted. She had her dream job and it was amazing, but she hadn't been living, not really.

 

“Maybe we do,” Clarke muttered. “So, what are some things you like to do other than draw?”

 

“Fishing, walking, running, going to the beach and pool, zip-lining. Drawing mostly. It's soothing.”

 

“I remember when I used to draw all the time. I always loved doing it. I miss it, but it was hard for me to get back into it. Fishing and zip-lining, I've never done. What's that like?”

 

“It's challenging, but I love it. Gracie and I will just go on our boat and ride out to the middle of the lake and fish. Well, I’d fish, she would just watch,” Lexa said, her voice giddy. “There's nothing like the rush of zip-lining. It completely takes my breath away. Gracie hasn't done it because she's not old enough, but I hope she’ll be brave enough to go one day.”

 

“I've never been.”

 

“I should take you one day. Also the zoo, amusement park, trampoline park, fishing, walking, zip-lining, the beach-”

 

“Okay, I get it! I don't know how to live!” Clarke huffed playfully. She was glad Lexa could tell she was joking with her.

 

“Well, I'm just saying. You're missing out on a lot-”

 

“I see that. I guess you're right. I work entirely too much.”

 

“There's nothing wrong with that, but you should have a balance between them.”

 

“I guess you're right.”

 

“In a couple weeks time, you'll be able to go to the beach without having to cover up.” Lexa sung.

 

“I'm guessing you want to take me to the beach?” Clarke chuckled.

 

“I want to see you in a bikini.” Lexa said lowly.

 

“I bet you'd be looking forward to that, huh?” Clarke teased.

 

“Please,” Lexa scoffed. “You’d be too.”

 

“You're right.”

 

“Would you really come with us? It'll just be Gracie and I.” Lexa asked.

 

“Of course. I should start living on the dangerous side.”

 

“The beach doesn't count as dangerous.”

 

Clarke heard a door slam and jumped. She grumbled because Finn was home early.

 

“I hate to cut this short, but I have to go.”

 

Lexa let out a long sigh, “Hubby back so soon?”

 

“Yes, he is.” Clarke sighed as well.

 

“I'll be seeing you around then. Bye.”

 

“Bye, Lexa.”

 

Clarke stared down at the ended call and frowned because she wanted to talk with Lexa longer.

 

Although she wanted nothing to do with Finn, she plastered on a fake smile when he walked through the door.

* * *

 

Another week went by without seeing Lexa. Clarke was going mad because she missed her immensely. The brunette mentioned that her schedule was packed for the next couple weeks, and it sucked.

 

Clarke moseyed around the house, with nothing to do. Lexa was completely right when she said she needed to start living. Clarke was starting to realize she didn't have any hobbies besides reading.

 

Finn was at the store, so Clarke decided to clean the house. She was wary of sending him alone because he never got the right things, but he insisted he go by himself. Clarke just let him. She had gone for them for the past two weeks and he wanted to make up for it.

 

Clarke didn't think much of it. She could use the break from going to the store. She decided to make the bed before reading, and maybe even call Lexa.

 

Clarke fluffed the pillows before making the bed. She squinted when something shiny caught her eye. She aired out her sheets, when she heard it drop to the floor.

 

Clarke thought it was hers as she bent to pick it up.

 

Clarke narrowed her eyes seeing it was a piece of her jewelry. It was a blue and black necklace with a raven on it.

 

Clarke looked at the necklace in confusion wondering why it’d fallen out of her bed. She continued to stare at the necklace for another minute before it dawned on her.

 

Clarke gasped putting two and two together, and got way more than she ever wanted to know. She knew exactly what was going on.

 

There were no words in the English dictionary that could describe the betrayal Clarke felt.

 

Clarke knew she wasn't overreacting. She wasn't imagining things or making things up in her head. This necklace belonged to Raven because Clarke bought it for her as a graduation gift, and the Latina had been wearing it ever since.

 

Raven hadn't been in her bedroom for a really long time. There was no other reason for her necklace to be here, tangled in her sheets, unless Finn took it off.

 

Clarke knew that wasn't the only thing Finn took off her and growled at the realization.

 

Clarke knew Finn would be home any minute. She shoved the necklace in her pocket before heading downstairs. She waited on the couch, preparing for a battle she knew she was going to win.

 

“Honey, I'm home!” Finn called out cheerfully. Clarke shook her head because she should've known. This whole time… right under her nose… Finn was…

 

“I'm in here!” Clarke yelled with more venom than she’d intended.

 

Finn frowned at Clarke's tone of voice. He took skeptical steps towards her, placing a few bags down by the couch.

 

“Everything okay?”

 

“Oh, just dandy. The house is clean. The lawn has been mowed and my garden is up to date. Our bed... our bed is made.” Clarke said lowly, standing up.

 

Finn looked at her in utter confusion. Clarke would've laughed if she hadn't spent the last half hour, preparing for this fight.

 

“Honey, what are you talking about?” Finn squinted her eyes at her before picking the bags up and heading towards the kitchen.

 

Clarke glared at the back of his head the whole time.

 

“So, were you really at the store?” Clarke asked, resting her palms against the counter.

 

“Um, yes. These bags didn't magically appear.” Finn said, turning around and putting the vegetables in the fridge.

 

“You have a lot of explaining to do.” Clarke said through a clenched jaw.

 

Finn threw the bag down and raised his hands in exasperation. “What are you talking about?”

 

“What the hell is this?” Clarke yelled, throwing the necklace in his face.

 

Finn’s eyes went wide, realizing what it was. Clarke took personal satisfaction in the way his face paled.

 

“Honey..” He said shakily. The guilty look on his face proved that Clarke wasn't over analyzing it.

 

“You and I both know I'm not overreacting and I'm not crazy so, you can save it. Whatever bullshit you're about to spiel you can shove it up your ass and get out.” Clarke gestured to the door.

 

Clarke didn't want to hear his explanation. They both knew she’d caught him in a lie. A sin. She felt sick in his presence and just wanted him out. She couldn't believe her best friend had stooped so low.

 

“Clarke!” Finn cried.

 

“She's my best friend! How could you?”

 

“It meant absolutely nothing. Honey, you have to believe me! Raven meant nothing!” Finn pleaded walking over to Clarke, but she moved away from him. She was, coincidentally, by the knifes.

 

“Get out.” Clarke gritted again, eyes flashing in anger.

 

“Honey, please! She meant nothing. I'll never see her again. I still want to marry you.” Finn begged.

 

Clarke chuckled darkly at him. Her patience had run out.

 

"You'll never be able to explain why you cheated on me with my best fucking friend!" Clarke roared. "And if you want to live to see another day then I suggest you get the hell out of my house."

 

Finn stood still for a moment, eyes wide and pleading. Clarke didn't break her act, glaring at him until he hung his head in shame.

 

Clarke felt like her heart broke when he finally turned around to leave.

 

"You can give the necklace back and tell my whore of a best friend to never call me again!" Clarke roared, following Finn out the house.

 

Clarke allowed herself to cry as she watched Finn get in his car and leave. She couldn't believe she got played like a fool.

 

She slammed the door before stomping upstairs.

 

There was only one person she wanted to see.

* * *

 

Clarke had to wait over an hour for her to come over. She knew she took Lexa by surprise, but she wanted nothing more than to be in Lexa's company.

 

Clarke sighed in relief hearing Lexa pull into her driveway. She threw the front door open, holding her arms out. Lexa jogged up to her, pulling her in for a tight hug.

 

“What happened?” Lexa asked, worry in voice. They made their way inside and sat on the couch.

 

“He cheated. He's cheating.” Clarke said.

 

“Oh.” Lexa frowned.

 

“With my best friend.” Clarke added making Lexa's eyes widen, she hadn't been expecting that.  

 

“Clarke, I'm so sorry.” Lexa said.

 

“I found her necklace in my bed, Lexa. _In my bed_.”

 

“We had sex in your bed.” Lexa shrugged.

 

“I changed the sheets. He didn't even-” Clarke cut herself off with a sigh.

 

“I'm sorry,” Lexa said, scooting closer to the blonde. “What are you thinking?” Lexa asked softly, placing a hand on Clarke’s thigh.

 

Clarke took a long while before answering. She clenched her jaw from side to side, looking straight ahead.

 

“We’re not so different,” Clarke whispered, flicking her eyes to Lexa's briefly. “Him and I.”

 

Lexa exhaled before pressing her lips into a thin line. She chewed on her bottom lip, not knowing what to say.

 

“What's going to happen?”

 

“He still wants to get married,” Clarke roared, getting up and pacing around the living room. “He had the nerve to tell me he still wants to after cheating on me!”

 

“Did you tell him?” Lexa asked.

 

“I didn't think it was the right time. I didn't want to tell him to even the score. That's not what this is about.”

 

“Then what is it about?” Lexa questioned, standing up and walking over to Clarke. “What are you going to do?”

 

“I don't know. I don't even want to know what's going to happen now.” Clarke said in a hushed tone.

 

“I'm sorry.” Lexa apologized.

 

“None of this is your fault.”

 

“I'm the one you cheated with.” Lexa retorted. She walked back over to the couch to sit down. Clarke followed suit, sitting close to Lexa.  

 

“And that was my decision to make and I take full responsibility for it. You have nothing to be sorry for.”

 

“Okay,” Lexa reached out, placing a hand on Clarke's thigh. The blonde didn't say anything when Lexa rubbed her leg up and down. “We’ll figure something out.”

 

“I'm leaving him.”

 

“Are you really?” Lexa hummed.

 

Clarke was giving Lexa a look the brunette was becoming very familiar with. It was what they did, Lexa knew this. Lexa knew this was deeper than what Clarke was letting on. It was obvious with the way Clarke rested a hand against Lexa's thigh.

 

It didn't surprise Lexa that Clarke didn't answer her. Lexa shivered at the intense gaze Clarke had on her lips.

 

Lexa had no idea what to do. Clarke's eyes were darkening by the second and Lexa couldn't lie and say she didn't want to.

 

The timing was terrible, but when had they ever gotten the timing right?

 

The second Clarke connected their eyes, the second Lexa’s eyes locked onto Clarke's dark ones, Lexa nodded.

 

Clarke whimpered before their lips even met. Clarke placed a longing kiss to her lips before breaking away and locking eyes with Lexa. They stayed pressed against each other, Lexa wasn't moving away. She nodded giving Clarke the permission she was seeking.

 

Clarke crashed her lips back with hers. Lexa gasped into the kiss, but eagerly kissed her back.

 

Clarke quickly straddled Lexa's lap, neither one of them breaking the kiss. Lexa placed her hands on her waist helping her grind in her lap. The second Clarke's mouth opened under hers, Lexa trailed her hands down to Clarke's butt. The blonde moaned when Lexa grabbed a hold of it. Clarke was thrusting her center into Lexa's and Lexa told herself not to get worked up like last time.

 

She distracted herself by placing butterfly kisses down Clarke's neck before nipping at her collarbone. She licked her way up to Clarke's ear before sucking it in her mouth. Clarke let out a deep moan, throwing her head back. Clarke had her hands tangled in Lexa's hair as she continued her assault.

 

Clarke was getting ready to ask if they could take this upstairs, when she heard someone pull into her driveway and a door slam.

 

 _“Lexa.”_ Clarke moaned out. Lexa was too caught up in what they were doing. She wasn't paying attention to Clarke.

 

“Lexa!” Clarke hissed realizing who was at her door. She could see through the crack between the curtains. Clarke's heart drop, softly swatting Lexa.

 

“You have to go!” Clarke said desperately. Her voice was a couple octaves lower and her eyes were clouded over in desire. “My mom is here.”

 

Lexa squeaked before standing up. She gathered her stuff up, preparing to walk out the door.

 

“Not the front door!” Clarke shrieked, grabbing a hold of her wrist. Lexa looked back, eyes wide in fear.

 

“Then how?” Lexa hissed.

 

“Out the back door and you can go through the gate.” Clarke said, pushing Lexa in the direction of the back door.

 

“I'll call you later?” Lexa asked hopefully, quickly rushing out the back.

 

“Yes. Call me later.” Clarke placed a quick kiss to her cheek before Lexa left out the door. She left just in time for her mother to barge through the door. Clarke gathered herself before making her way to the front door.

 

“Clarke! Clarke! I've been calling you!” Her mother called. Clarke rolled her eyes because she didn't want to deal with this right now.

 

Her heart pounded in her chest, hoping she appeared normal.

 

“I'm right here mom!” Clarke said.

 

Abby rushed over to her once Clarke appeared in the hallway.

 

“Oh, thank god! Finn told me what happened. What's wrong with you?” Abby exclaimed.

 

Clarke narrowed her eyes at her mother. There was no way she would ask that question after knowing the events that took place.

 

“What exactly did Finn say to you?” Clarke asked slowly.

 

“That you went mad and kicked him out the house!” Abby answered.

 

Clarke clenched her jaw, not even forming words to speak. She shouldn't have put it pass Finn to lie about what had really happened.

 

“I did go mad and I certainly kicked him out the house,” Clarke sneered. “Did he tell you why I did that?” Clarke was surprised how calm she was being about the whole situation.

 

“Um,” Abby squinted at her, her movements faltering. “No.”

 

“He cheated on me!” Clarke exclaimed. Abby went silent for a moment, processing the information that Clarke just told her.

 

"He's cheating on me, mom," Clarke confessed with shaky breaths. "With Raven."

 

Abby gasped, placing a hand over her heart. She gawked at her daughter before pulling it together.

 

"Well," Abby muttered. "What husband doesn't cheat on their wife?"

 

Clarke gritted her teeth together, shaking her head angrily. “You can't be serious!”

 

“You're going to proceed with this wedding and you're going to get married.” Abby said as matter of fact.

 

“I'll do no such thing!” Clarke protested, outraged.

 

“Honey, I'm sure it was just a one time thing-”

 

“Who knows how long he cheated and I didn't bother to even ask. I can't believe you're defending him!” Clarke yelled.

 

“He's a man! Men cheat!” Abby yelled back.

 

“I guess women cheat too, then!” Clarke confessed. She was so heated, she wasn't aware of what she was saying. Her eyes widened at spilling her secret.

 

“What's that suppose to mean?” Abby squinted her eyes at her.

 

“I slept with my tattoo artist,” Clarke admitted. She’d already admitted it partly. She might as well go all out. “I was feeling courageous one day, and I thought to myself: how am I going to fuck up my engagement today? I might as well cheat and so I did. With my tattoo artist. Her body was covered in tattoos and she’s more muscular and better in bed than Finn will ever be.”

 

“You're lying!” Abby stared at her daughter in shock listening to what her daughter was telling her.

 

“No, I'm not. Do you want to call her and ask?”

 

“How dare you? You little slut.” Her mother hissed, pointing an offended finger at her. Her mother’s words stung and cut through her like a sharp knife, but Clarke held her head high.

 

“Oh, so because I cheated, I'm a slut. But when Finn cheats, his excuse is that he's a man?” Clarke asked with tears welling up in her eyes.

 

“That's exactly what I'm saying!” Abby's eyes darkened in threat. Clarke stared at her mother in disbelief for a moment, before walking to the front door.

 

“Well, you can take your sorry fucking opinions and you can get out of my house!” Clarke shouted, throwing the door opened.

 

“Gladly. You need to do some soul searching. Maybe take a look at that hideous tattoo you got, and realize you need to grow up.” Abby threw Clarke another disgusted look before slamming the door behind her.

 

Clarke allowed herself to slide down it and let her tears fall. Clarke was hurt, and had no idea what to do about this whole situation.

 

Clarke made the healthy decision that she was going to come clean to Finn and tell him she wanted to call off the wedding. Her heart ached at the thought of how many family members she was disappointing. They’d been so excited when they announced that they were getting married.

 

Clarke couldn't bring herself to care. She allowed herself to cry for a few minutes before wiping them away and getting up.

 

She needed to get her act together because she had many things to resolve.

 

Clarke didn't even know how she was going to come face to face with Raven. She couldn't believe she didn't see it before. Why Raven was so busy, why they hardly have been hanging out recently. She should've known all along.

 

Clarke didn't know how long it had been going on. A part of her didn't even want to know. It gave her a headache just thinking about it.

 

The more she thought about it, the angrier she got. Clarke couldn't believe she hadn’t figure it out sooner. She had no idea if she would’ve ever found out, if it hadn’t been finding Raven’s necklace.

 

Clarke went to the kitchen and poured herself a glass of wine. She downed it in three gulps and poured another.

 

She sighed leaning against the counter. There were many thoughts running through her. Too many for her to focus on a specific one.

 

Clarke downed another glass of wine. She knew she should probably stop, but wanted her thoughts to stop. She knew they wouldn't so she poured yet another glass. She had lost count on how many she had.

 

Clarke couldn't believe how much time she put into this weddings, just for it not to happen. She had spent countless weekends planning with Jennifer on something that wasn't even going to happen.

 

Clarke refused to marry Finn. She didn't care what Finn wanted or what her mother wanted. She would rather climb the tallest mountain, than marry Finn and she wasn't one for physical activity.

 

Clarke knew this wasn't over though. She knew her mom wouldn't let this go.

 

Clarke sighed heavily. The house suddenly felt a lot bigger and quieter without Finn.

 

Clarke warmed up some leftovers before trudging up the stairs. It was the strangest feeling because her heart felt heavy, yet so empty at the same time.

 

Clarke looked at the front door, thinking about how Finn left. Clarke couldn't help but think that with him, went none of her.

 

Clarke felt like her heart didn't go with him. It hadn't affected her the way she thought it would. Clarke was fine with Finn not being here and in the back of her mind, she could hear Lexa's voice asking if she really loved him.

 

Clarke would probably answer no, now. She did love him at one point, but knew it was over. She knew it was over the minute she cheated.  

 

It frightened her how quickly she let all of this go. She didn't care about the wedding and she wanted to throw Jennifer’s book of all their plans for the wedding away. It was over.

 

The realization almost made her drop her food. She couldn't believe she just thought that. Clarke quickly shook her head before reaching her bedroom.

 

She already knew it was going to be a restless night.


	13. Chapter 13

Clarke waited for Finn to come over with her hands in her lap. It was scary how much Clarke didn't want to see him. She’d been so wrapped up in him the last few months and felt like a complete idiot, not seeing he had been cheating.

 

Clarke stayed where she was when she heard her front door open. She was sitting at the dinner table and waited for Finn to make his way through the house.

 

Finn sighed when he spotted Clarke and quickly rushed over to her.

 

“Thanks for agreeing to meet me.” Finn said while sitting down. Clarke didn't say anything, just glared at him.

 

“I'm sorry about all of this, Clarke. I never wanted you to find out this way. I- I-”

 

“So, how long has it been going on?” Clarke asked, finally speaking. She didn't want to hear the answer. A part of her didn't really care, but the other part desperately needed to know the answer.

 

“A little over a year.” Finn whispered. Clarke stared at him in shock, letting a small growl come out. The closest thing to her was a dish towel and she chucked it his way and hit him right in the face.

 

“You've been cheating on me for a year! Finn, are you fucking kidding me? Why the hell did you even propose to me if you were cheating on me?” Clarke spat.

 

“Because I knew you were my forever. Raven meant nothing. I meant it when I said I still wanted to marry you.”

 

Clarke thought it was time to get back at him. She didn't want to wait another second to hurt him.

 

“I don't want to marry you, Finn,” Clarke said. She ignored the hurt in his eyes. She was ready to confess what she’d done as well. “I slept with someone.”

 

Clarke watched a variety of different emotions flash across Finn’s face. She reveled in every single one of them.

 

“You're lying.” Finn shook his head in disbelief. Clarke flashed him a smirk.

 

“You're not the only one who can get around, Finn.” Clarke responded, her teeth gritted together. She watched in satisfaction as Finn stood up and started pacing around. He was waving his hands around and cursing.

 

“With who? Oh, my fucking God, Clarke. You better tell me with who.” Finn slammed his hands down on the table, trying to scare her. Clarke wasn't scared of him, not even a little bit.

 

“Now, why would I tell you that? I think it's time for you to leave.” Clarke folded her arms across her chest and jutted her chin towards the door.

 

“Who did you cheat on me with?” Finn roared.

 

“That's none of your damn business. I had sex with this person twice. That’s it. You cheated on me for an entire year.”

 

“But, you didn't know I was cheating. So, that means… that means you willingly did this!” Finn was starting to connect the dots, which made Clarke smile wickedly.

 

“Get out, Finn. You and I have nothing more to discuss.” Clarke said.

 

“We’re getting married, you little slut! You're mine!” Finn hissed making Clarke scoff at him.

 

“No, I'm not. I can't believe you even said that. You're not mine and I'm not yours. We’re over. Get out before I call the police,” Clarke's eyes darkened with her threat. “Don't bother contacting me because I'm not going to answer and don’t you even _think_ about coming by the house. Get out.”

 

“Clarke!” Finn pleaded.

 

“Get out!”

 

“You act like you're so innocent, but you’re not.” Finn growled.

 

“I never said I was. I can assure you both nights I definitely wasn't.” Clarke smirked dirtily at him.

 

“How dare you bring that up around me!”

 

Clarke rolled her eyes, she was completely done with this conversation. She wordlessly walked towards the front door and threw it open.

 

“Out.” She grunted.

 

Finn sighed heavily, throwing one last desperate look at Clarke. Clarke slammed the door in his face and turned around.

 

She felt like a burden was finally lifted off her shoulders.

* * *

 

Clarke had waited a week to call Lexa. They had texted here and there, but didn’t talk about what happened. Clarke felt like she was in high school again. She zoned everything out while she typed out cute messages to Lexa.

 

It was Saturday, and Lexa was finally free for the night. Clarke was itching to call her. She wasn't sure what to say, but didn't want to stall it anymore. She needed to hear her voice.

 

Clarke waited impatiently for Lexa to answer the phone. The second she did, Clarke spoke.

 

“Oh, thank god. I've missed you.” Clarke hadn't been expecting to greet Lexa like that, but didn't take it back. Lexa made a surprise noise over the phone before responding.

 

“I've missed you too,” She breathed. “How did it go?”

 

“Terrible as I was expecting. I told him I didn't want to marry him.”

 

“So, did you tell him?” Lexa asked in surprise.

 

“I did. I didn't say who I was cheating with. He was pissed. I don't know what's going to happen, but I don't want him and the wedding is off. We haven't told our families yet, except my mom.” Clarke explained.

 

“I'm so sorry about this.”

 

“I don't know what to think, but I'm glad I'm not going to marry him.”

 

“I told you,” Lexa's voice came cockily over the line. “He wasn't the one for you.”

 

Clarke stayed silent for a moment or two. She had no idea how to process the words Lexa said. Clarke didn't know how she hadn’t seen it before.

 

Clarke was so wrapped up in her thoughts, she almost missed Lexa's question.

 

“Why don't you come out with us tonight? Gracie’s with Costia's mom tonight. We’re going to the bar. We’re taking a much needed break from today. Saturday’s are great because they're my busiest days, but I need a drink.” Lexa offered.

 

“Do your friends even want me there?” Clarke asked warily.

 

“I want you there, so who cares, but yes. They wouldn't mind if you came.” Lexa answered.

 

“Okay. I could use a drink or two. Maybe ten.”

 

“Oh, god. In that case, don't drive. I'll pick you up.” Lexa said. Clarke could hear rustling over the phone and smiled at the thought of seeing Lexa soon.

 

“That would be lovely. Thank you.”

 

“I'll be there soon.” Lexa said as her goodbye.

 

“Bye.” Clarke said hanging the phone up. She went upstairs to take a quick shower and freshen up. She put on a dress that was a size too small and a slit up the side of it that revealed her toned thighs. She was wearing a diamond necklace and an expensive watch on her wrist. Her breasts were on full display and she smirked at herself in the mirror.

 

It wasn't long before Lexa pulled up. She grabbed her purse and headed out the door to greet her.

 

“Wow,” Lexa's eyes blown wide as she blew out a breath. “You look… _hot_.”

 

“Well, thank you. You don't look too bad yourself.” Lexa's hair was up in a high bun. She was wearing a navy blue flannel, a white tank top with dark pants. Her sleeves were rolled up, which displayed her tattoos perfectly.

 

“Your tattoo is looking really good. It's hot.” Lexa commented making Clarke flash her a flirty smile.

 

“Well, I’m glad someone thinks so.” Clarke said getting into the car.

 

The second Lexa buckled herself in, Clarke leaned in to place a kiss on her cheek.

 

“Thanks for inviting me. I needed a night out.” Clarke mumbled against her cheek. Lexa's breathing became erratic and her movements faltered at Clarke being so close.

 

“Of course.” Lexa finally found the words to speak. Clarke smiled slightly because she knew the effect she was having on Lexa. She stayed still against her, lips still pressed to her cheek, before pulling away after a few moments.

 

With shaky hands, Lexa pulled out of the driveway as best she could before driving down to the bar.

* * *

 

The bar was buzzing with locals by time they got there. It was a pretty common bar and provided enough entertainment with the pool tables scattered around and dart boards in the back.

 

Lexa immediately spotted her friends in the back and guided Clarke over to them.

 

“Hey, guys.” Lexa greeted happily. Clarke was standing next to her and Octavia got up to greet her.

 

“Nice to see you again, Clarke,” Octavia said politely before pulling Lexa in for a hug. “Hey, boss.”

 

“Octavia,” Lexa muttered shyly. “I told you not to call me that in public.”

 

“Oh, right. Sorry.” Octavia said sheepishly.

 

Monty and Jasper stumbled over their greetings just like the first time. Lexa was surprised when Anya offered her a firm nod. Clarke simply stared at her before turning her attention to a waiter.

 

She discreetly called one of the waiters over. He stumbled over his words, looking at Clarke's cleavage more than her eyes. Lexa growled softly at him. He must've not heard it because his eyes were still glued to Clarke's breasts.

 

He was pouring Clarke a drink and the blonde tapped the glass for him to stop. He was getting ready to walk away, when Clarke caught his wrist.

 

“You know what,” Clarke hummed. “Why don't you just leave the bottle with me?”

 

The guy’s eyes widen at her touch, but nodded rapidly.

 

“Of course, ma'am. Anything else I could get you?” He asked eagerly.

 

“What would you like?” Clarke turned toward Lexa.

 

“Just a beer.” Lexa growled again. Clarke frowned for a moment before turning back to the waiter.

 

“A beer for her, please.” Clarke said. The guy scurried off to get Lexa one.

 

They were sitting close together. Clarke's bare thigh was in constant contact with Lexa's jeans. Clarke dropped her hand down to Lexa's thigh and squeezed it. She frowned when Lexa wouldn't look at her. Her gaze was focused on the waiter instead.

 

“Everything okay?” Clarke asked, throwing her drink back. Her face scrunched up with the burn, before relaxing. Jasper and Monty gawked at the action.

 

“Hard week.” Clarke shrugged noticing their stares.

 

“Just fine. He was having a staring contest with your boobs.” Lexa muttered. Clarke poured herself another drink, knocking it back before answering.

 

“I didn't notice.” Clarke said slowly, sporting a frown upon not noticing. She usually paid better attention to it, but was too wrapped up in looking at Lexa.

 

The guy came back with Lexa's beer, everyone else already had their preferred drink.

 

“Thanks.” Lexa said before the guy walked off again, but not before looking at Clarke's chest again.

 

“Our vacation is coming up soon!” Octavia said happily. Everyone around the table seemed to cheer up at that. Clarke stayed silent as they talked, but occasionally caressed or squeezed Lexa's thigh.

 

“I know I can't wait. It'll be even better than last year!” Jasper gushed making Anya roll her eyes.

 

“You say that every year.”

 

“Yeah, but I have a feeling it really will be,” Jasper reasoned, flashing a shy smile at Clarke. “Especially if Clarke can come.”

 

Clarke's grip on Lexa's thigh tightened tremendously making Lexa hiss softly. Lexa blushed as her friends stared at them expectantly.

 

“I mean-  I haven't really-” Clarke took a deep breath before continuing. “Lexa hasn't exactly invited me.”

 

Now the spotlight was on Lexa, which made her blush anymore. She was getting ready to speak, when Octavia spoke loudly over the music.

 

“Oh, my god!” Octavia exclaimed. “You two are so cute!”

 

Clarke quickly poured herself another drink while Lexa gulped down her beer. Anya was glaring at Octavia and Lexa was wiping her hands nervously on her jeans. The tension was thick at the table and Lexa had no idea how to respond.

 

“Alright, let's talk about something else!” Lincoln suggested. Lexa sighed in relief. Lincoln always had a way of clearing the tension.

 

Clarke threw back her drink and was relieved the attention wasn't on her. Normally, she would love the attention. She always had eyes on her no matter where she went, especially at work.

 

Clarke was pouring her fourth drink, when the door to the bar opened.

 

Clarke didn't see her at first, but felt her presence. Lexa had no idea who she was, but saw that she was making her way to their table.

 

“I can't wait to get away for a week!” Jasper said, returning to their previous conversation. Lexa was getting ready to agree with him, when she heard Clarke growl. It was loud, unexpected and threw everyone off.

 

“You have got to be kidding me!” Clarke exclaimed. Lexa looked at her in confusion as Clarke stood up. The force in which she stood knocked over her chair.

 

“Clarke, what's going on?” Lexa asked quietly. Clarke didn't answer. Instead, she downed another shot before locking eyes on the girl who was approaching them.

 

She was a Latina woman, with brunette hair. She was wearing jeans and a t-shirt. She was wringing her hands with each step she took. Lexa feared for the Latina's life when she saw the look on Clarke's face.

 

“I'm going to murder you!” Clarke yelled, catching everyone’s attention. Lexa sighed because those weren't the best words to exclaim in a room full of people.

 

“Clarke, please. Please, let me explain and you can-” The Latina woman tried to talk, but Clarke cut her off.

 

“You have a lot of nerve coming here! Go away, Raven! I want nothing to do with you!” Clarke screamed. “I hope it was fucking worth it! You and I will _never_ be friends again. So, I don't want to hear anything you have to say.”

 

Lexa looked back and forth between Clarke and the girl, Raven. Lexa stood close to Clarke because she looked like she was going to charge at any moment.

 

“It meant nothing! I don't want to be with him! Clarke, please. You're my best friend. I can't lose you.” Raven pleaded, eyes filled with tears.

 

“Well,” When Clarke took a dangerous step towards Raven, Lexa moved with her. “You should've thought about that before you cheated.”

 

“Don't act so fucking innocent, Clarke,” Raven scoffed. “Finn told me you cheated on him too!”

 

“Oh, so you've been seeing him after all this? I’m not surprised.” Clarke huffed, not giving Raven time to answer. “I didn't cheat on him with his best friend! Not with his _fucking_ best friend.” Clarke's voice cracked the second time around. Lexa knew better than to comfort Clarke right now. Instead, Lexa just glared at the woman in front of them.

 

“Is this her?” Raven asked suspiciously. Lexa hated the way the woman’s eyes scanned her body. “The one covered in tattoos?”

 

“Who cares who it was with and it's none of your business. You don't have any right to know anymore,” Clarke whispered. “Get out.”

 

“Clarke, please. We’ve been through so much. We grew up together. I don't know what I’d do if I lost you. Finn meant absolutely nothing.”

 

Clarke placed her hand on her hips. Her jaw cracked from side to side.

 

“Clarke, please-”

 

“Go away!” Clarke roared, throwing her drink in Raven’s direction. The brunette crouched down just in time for it to hit the wall and Lexa decided it was finally time to make her move.

 

“Okay, why don't we leave?” Lexa asked walking closer to Clarke. Her hands hovered around her waist, but she didn't touch her.

 

Raven looked at Clarke in disbelief, like she couldn't believe she just chucked her drink at her. Clarke’s breathing was heavy and she was seething with anger. Raven’s shoulders deflated, looking at Clarke with remorse.

 

“Look, I really think you should get out of here. You're making this situation worse. Why don't you just leave her alone?” Clarke whipped her head around in surprise when she saw Octavia approaching them.

 

Raven glared at the girl, her eyes narrowed in anger.

 

“I'm sorry, who are you? I'm trying to have a conversation with my best friend.”

 

“Former best friend,” Octavia corrected her. “Leave now, Raven.” Octavia was small, but could make someone cower in fear in a blink of an eye. Octavia stood tall by Clarke, who was looking at her in shock. They locked eyes briefly. Octavia offered Clarke a small smile, before Clarke nodded. She stood tall next to Octavia and Lexa while they glared at Raven.

 

The Latina gaped at Clarke. She opened and closed her mouth multiple times before sighing.

 

“I'll go.” Raven whispered.

 

“Good! Don't let the door hit your slutty ass on the way out!” Clarke spat. Raven looked devastated, but it wasn’t going to work on Clarke. She held her ground and glared at Raven on her way out.

 

The people around the bar gaped at the blonde. Most of the men were eying her body and the women were nodding their heads appreciatively.

 

“You are quite the head turner and I'm not just talking about what just happened.” Lexa muttered into her ear. Clarke's body relaxed as Lexa leaned against her. Lexa didn't care that her friends were watching them. Clarke was upset and wanted to be near her.

 

“I'm sorry,” Clarke sighed. “I'm really sorry about that. Maybe we should go.”

 

“I'm fine with that.” Lexa said looking up. Her shoulders stiffened when the employee that was ogling Clarke earlier came by.

 

“I'm sorry about your glass, darling,” Lexa's ears immediately perked up as did the hairs on the back of her neck at hearing Clarke purr. “I guess I had one too many, and my anger got the best of me. I'll pay for it if I have to. Money is no issue for me.”

 

Clarke's voice was _dirty_. Lexa could see her smile in her eyes, but the guy couldn't. He quickly cleaned up the mess before locking eyes with Clarke's breasts once again. She was proudly puffing out her chest.

 

“It's just a glass and that's all that broke. I’m sure it will be okay.” The guy said.

 

“Thank you,” Clarke squinted at his name tag. “ _Greg_. Thank you, Greg.” She purred.

 

Clarke grabbed Lexa's hand, who waved a quick goodbye to her friends before leaving.

 

“Wow,” Lexa said stunned. “So that’s how you get yourself out of trouble?”

 

“I like finding myself in situations I can't get out of,” Clarke threw a dangerous look towards Lexa. “My life may be boring, but that doesn't mean I can't be bad.”

 

“Clarke...” Lexa breathed. The tension between them was suffocating. Clarke didn't answer, just continued to walk until they were at Lexa's car.

 

“You know,” Clarke’s voice dropped down a few notches. “I only had four drinks out of ten.”

 

“So, what are you going to do about it?” Lexa asked bravely.

 

“I think I’m going to go back to your place and finish the last 6.” Clarke answered before getting in the car.

 

“I know this is ruining the moment, but I want to take you somewhere tomorrow.” Lexa said, starting her car up.

 

“Oh, god. That could be anywhere. Probably off a cliff.” Clarke huffed, making Lexa giggle.

 

“You'll like it.” Lexa said reassuringly.

 

“I highly doubt it.” Clarke scoffed.

 

“What if I fuck you all night?” Lexa asked tauntingly. “Then will you come with me?”

 

“I would've gone with you regardless, but thanks for the incentive. Now, you have to do it.” Clarke grinned victoriously. Lexa just smirked. She could already feel her dick starting to harden. Lexa raced the car down the streets until she got to her house.

 

Lexa was quick to get out the car. She opened Clarke's door before guiding them inside. Lexa started undressing Clarke the second she slammed the door closed. She started with her heels, before unzipping her dress. She took Clarke's bra off, before discarding her underwear.

 

“Someone’s eager.” Clarke smirked against her lips. Lexa growled while fumbling with her belt and pulling her pants down. She stepped out of them before connecting her lips to Clarke's neck, effectively backing her up against the wall.

 

“Not my fault you're so hot. My dick is so hard.” Lexa whispered against her neck. She leaned down to lick up her neck, before crashing their lips together. Lexa's head was spinning and she gripped at Clarke's waist tighter.

 

Lexa pulled away a second later before guiding Clarke into the kitchen.

 

“This isn't your bedroom.” Clarke looked around amused. Lexa stripped her shirt off before gently pushing Clarke towards the dinner table. She didn't allow herself to think about Gracie right now. Lexa’s only thoughts were Clarke.

 

“Up.” Lexa growled. Clarke shivered getting on the table. She spread her legs, making Lexa moan loudly.

 

“Words can't describe how wet you make me.” Clarke smirked. Lexa stood in the middle of her kitchen, gaping at her. Lexa's mouth watered at the sight of Clarke. Her chest was heaving, with her legs wide open. Her eyes were darkened in desire and her lips parted.

 

Lexa was getting ready to rush over and get a taste, when she thought of something.

 

“Touch yourself.” Lexa instructed. Clarke's eyes widened at the demand, not expecting it. Clarke quickly regained herself, throwing Lexa a dirty look. She was never one to back down from a challenge.

 

Clarke licked two fingers. She locked eyes with Lexa as her hand made its way down her body. Clarke gasped when she slid her fingers through herself. Lexa whimpered as Clarke rubbed tight circles around her clit.

 

“Inside.” Lexa demanded. Clarke threw her head back before slowly thrusting inside.

 

“Fuck. Just.. _fuck_ -” Clarke moaned. “Lexa!”

 

Clarke's fingers were pumping vigorously in her. Lexa rubbed her bulge a couple times before finally having enough and rushing over.

 

“Remove them and let me taste.” Lexa said. Clarke quickly removed her fingers shoving them in Lexa's mouth. The brunette grabbed a hold of her hand and licked them clean.

 

“Please,” Clarke begged, thrusting her hips against the air and pushing on Lexa's head. “ _Please_.”

 

Lexa gave in. She sunk to her knees and pulled Clarke closer to her. The blonde moaned before Lexa's mouth was even on her. Lexa kissed up her thighs, sucking bruises into them. Clarke tried more than once to get Lexa where she needed and was dripping in anticipation.

 

Lexa couldn't deny her anymore. She brushed her mouth over Clarke's center before placing sloppy kisses to her clit. Clarke cried out when she sucked on it roughly.

 

“Yes, yes, yes.” Clarke moaned while thrusting her hips in Lexa's mouth. Lexa ate Clarke out eagerly, moaning with every swipe of her tongue. Clarke was a writhing mess above her, before she suddenly stopped Lexa.

 

“Wait, wait, wait,” Clarke panted. “I want your dick inside.”

 

Lexa pulled her clit into her mouth one more time before releasing it. She stood up, tugging her boxers down her legs. Clarke moaned when Lexa’s dick sprang out of it. Clarke bit her lip, already preparing for the invasion.

 

Lexa leaned down to kiss Clarke before planting one hand on the table, and the other on her thigh.

 

Clarke's face screwed up in pleasure as Lexa started pushing inside. Lexa moaned as Clarke eagerly took her dick and tightened around it.

 

Clarke placed a hand on Lexa's toned stomach, silently telling her she needed time. Lexa kissed Clarke's forehead, and waited for Clarke's permission to move.

 

The second Clarke nodded and relaxed around her, Lexa started moving.

 

Clarke cursed before biting down on her lip. Clarke leaned back on her elbows, watching Lexa work between her legs. She whimpered and whined with every thrust.

 

Lexa concentrated on what she was doing. She set out a steady rhythm for both of them. It wasn't long before Lexa reached down to attack Clarke's breasts. She rolled a nipple between her fingers, pulling a deep moan from Clarke. She continued to run her hands down Clarke's body until she reached her clit. Lexa rubbed fast circles around it while pumping her hips hard into her.

 

“ _Ohh_.” Clarke moaned loudly.

 

“I don't know how I'm going to eat at this dinner table without thinking about fucking you on it.” Lexa moaned in Clarke's ear. The blonde’s eyes rolled to the back of her head. Lexa held on tight to her ankle, jerking her hips hard and fast into her.

 

“Lexa! _Lexa_ , you feel so good. Your dick is so deep inside me.” Clarke had never been this vocal during sex. Lexa was bringing out her dirty side and she couldn't help it. Clarke couldn't help telling Lexa how good she was doing whereas with Finn, she’d moan here and there weakly, letting him know he was doing okay. She didn’t have to do that with Lexa, she was doing _fantastic_. Clarke was quickly reaching her orgasm.

 

“Are you close?” Lexa panted against her skin. Lexa was thrusting so hard into her, the table was moving with them.

 

“Yes! Oh, god, yes! You're gonna make me cum.” Clarke whimpered. Her breasts swaying with each thrust. Lexa ogled them the whole time while listening to Clarke fall apart beneath her.

 

“Lexa!” Clarke whined before clenching down around her. Lexa let out a deep moan at being trapped inside Clarke. The blonde spasmed beneath her, riding out her orgasm. Lexa gave her a few shallow thrusts helping her out.

 

“Turn around.” Lexa said pulling out of Clarke. The blonde stood up before swiftly turning around. She rested her elbows on the table, her butt sticking high in the air. Lexa licked her lips excitedly. She gave Clarke a smack on her butt, before thrusting back into her.

 

When Lexa was buried deep inside of Clarke, she immediately went to work slamming her hips into the blonde hard and deep.

 

“Oh, fuck!” Clarke cried out. Lexa gripped at Clarke's hips tight, plowing into her. She groaned with every thrust.

 

“Tell me when you're going to cum.” Clarke panted out. Lexa whimpered before finding her voice.

 

“Okay.” Lexa planted sloppy kisses to Clarke's shoulders. She reached around squeezing Clarke's breasts in her hands before picking up the pace. Her hips were smacking against the blonde’s, who was squeaking with each thrust.

 

“It's so good!” Clarke groaned. Lexa could feel her walls closing in on her dick again. Clarke was going to cum again. The thought made Lexa's dick jerk painfully inside Clarke.

 

The blonde let out a few loud moans back to back before going absolutely silent. Clarke shook beneath her with Lexa holding her as best she could, while continuing to drill her hips in her.

 

Lexa feared her neighbors could hear Clarke's moans right now, but wanted everyone on this block to know just how good she was giving it to Clarke.

 

When Clarke's orgasm subsided, Lexa frantically pumped her hips until a tingle ran down her spine. Her stomach tightened deliciously before Lexa forced herself to pull out.

 

“I'm gonna cum.” Lexa said breathlessly. Clarke hummed before turning around. She brought Lexa in for a chaste kiss, it was sloppy, and all tongue, but neither of them cared.

 

Clarke had never been so eager to suck a dick in her life. She felt so dirty sinking to the floor, but an excited chill ran through her at being eye level with Lexa's dick. She licked her way up Lexa’s shaft and took it into her mouth.

 

“Ahh.” Lexa whimpered once Clarke started bobbing her head up and down. Clarke placed her hands on Lexa's thighs, balancing herself while taking her dick.

 

Lexa pushed down on Clarke's head, trying to get her to take more of her. She moaned at the way Clarke choked noisily on her dick.

 

“I swear you do that on purpose.” Clarke growled releasing her dick. Lexa looked down at her with dark eyes. Her lips were parted, and was desperately trying to fill her lungs with air.

 

“I want you to take my whole dick, Clarke.” Lexa moaned. Clarke nodded, her brows furrowed in concentration. She sucked the tip in her mouth before slowly taking inch after inch. Lexa kept her hips still and hands on the table. She watched in complete awe as Clarke slowly, but surely, devoured her dick.

 

“Just like that.” Lexa squeaked. Clarke repeated her actions until Lexa stiffened beneath her. Clarke quickly pulled away, bringing a hand up to pump her dick.

 

Clarke opened her mouth the same time Lexa started nodding, silently telling her it was coming.

 

Lexa groaned loudly when she felt the first spurt of cum fly out. It landed directly in Clarke's mouth before the blonde jerked her again and the rest of Lexa's load landed in her mouth. Lexa whimpered as Clarke milked her for everything she had.

 

When Lexa was finished, Clarke rose to her feet. She wiped the back of her mouth before bringing Lexa in for a searing kiss. Lexa groaned when she tasted herself on Clarke's tongue.

 

“You bring out my bad side. That was so hot.” Clarke whispered against her lips.

 

“You love my dick.” Lexa hummed back, stroking her tongue into her mouth before pulling away. She loved that she was starting to feel confident around Clarke. The blonde made it easy.

 

“I do.” Clarke admitted making Lexa smile slightly.

 

They gathered their clothes quietly before Lexa turned to look at Clarke. She eyed the naked woman hungrily.

 

“Do you wanna go be bad in my bed?” Lexa asked hopefully.

 

“If you tell me what we’re doing tomorrow.” Clarke answered. Lexa grinned evilly at her.

 

“Not a chance in hell.” Lexa responded immediately.

 

“Then I can't be bad for you,” Clarke shrugged. “I can't let you pound my pussy the way I so desperately want you too. I can't suck your dick and I certainly can't play with your balls then.”

 

“Now, that's just unfair,” Lexa grumbled. “You can't say things like that and get away with it.”

 

“Then, what are you going to do about it?” Clarke challenged.

 

“I'm not going to give in. That may work on someone else, but not me.” Lexa said holding her head high. She was wondering what she was doing because Clarke was standing _naked_ right in front of her.

 

“Then, I'm not going to let you fuck me. I guess I'll just fuck my self and you can watch.” Clarke shrugged innocently.

 

“I wanted to take you out of your comfort zone,” Lexa said walking up to Clarke. “I wanted to try new things with you.”

 

Lexa walked over, running her hands down Clarke's body.

 

“I wanted you to feel free for a few hours after everything that's happened,” Lexa murmured. “Have you ever gone rock climbing?”

 

Clarke frowned locking eyes with Lexa. “I haven't.”

 

“That's where I’m taking you,” Lexa confessed, pulling a gasp from Clarke. “Now, can we please go upstairs so you can show me just how bad you can be?”

 

Clarke grinned excitedly at her.

 

“We’ll talk about this whole rock climbing thing in the morning,” Clarke said, starting to walk up the stairs. “I guess I could show you a few ways. You might moan a little. Or a lot.”

 

“Can you give me a hint?” Lexa asked excitedly. Clarke stopped walking, Lexa's front collided with her back. Lexa was a fool not to cop a feel. She ran her hands over Clarke's butt, squeezing it before the blonde regained herself.

 

“Actually, yes,” Clarke turned around. The look in her eye made Lexa gulp. “Do you have whip cream and possibly chocolate syrup?”

 

“I do.” Lexa whispered out, confused. When Lexa made no move to get it, Clarke huffed.

 

“Well,” Clarke drawled out. “Are you going to go get it?”

 

“Why would we need-” Lexa cut herself off, realizing what Clarke wanted to do. She groaned loudly, resting her head against Clarke's stomach.

 

“Clarke,” Lexa's voice was the lowest it had ever been. “That's just fuckin’ dirty. You really _are_ bad.”

 

Lexa rushed to her fridge, her heart pounding in excitement knowing what was about to happen.

 

“You've seen nothing yet. This is just the warm up.” Clarke said as they finally made their way up the stairs. Lexa stared at Clarke's butt the entire time until they reached the bedroom.

 

Lexa was positive she was going to hell for the amount of sin that happened in her room that night.

 

She didn’t regret a single moment.


	14. Chapter 14

Lexa yawned and stretched, her limbs cracked, making her groan. The bright sun was shining through her curtains and made her squint. She took a minute to herself before rolling over and thumping up against something.

 

“Ow!” Clarke said, but it was muffled. Lexa could barely hear her as her head was buried in the pillows.

 

“Sorry.” Lexa apologized. Clarke groaned loudly turning over to face Lexa.

 

“Good morning.” Clarke grunted. Lexa chuckled because Clarke's eyes weren't even open.

 

“Rough night?” Lexa asked knowingly. Clarke popped one eye open and then the other.

 

“Something like that.”

 

Lexa leaned in placing a soft kiss to the blonde’s lips. Even first thing in the morning, Clarke was stunning. They shared a soft look with each other and Lexa couldn't help but lean in again to kiss her.

 

Lexa couldn't explain it, but it felt right waking up next to Clarke. By the look on Clarke's face, she was thinking the exact same thing. Lexa wished all her mornings could be spent like this; tangled up in bed with Clarke. Their legs were entwined with each other and Clarke was rubbing her hand up and down her arm.

 

“Today's going to be exciting.” Lexa sighed happily.

 

“Maybe we can talk about this,” Clarke groaned while sitting up. “My legs feel like jello. I'm so sore from last night. I don’t think rock climbing is the best thing to do the day after having sex all night.”

 

“I wore you out?” Lexa asked giddily, waggling her eyebrows.

 

“Yes,” Clarke sighed with a smirk. She leaned down to place a kiss on Lexa's cheek before stretching. “I thought it was obvious with the way I passed out after. I haven't been that wild in years.”

 

“It was a wild night.” Lexa hummed in agreement. They both smiled fondly at each other before Lexa tapped Clarke's hips.

 

“Let's go make breakfast “ Lexa suggested.

 

Clarke didn't protest. They both worked up quite the appetite all night. She got up and didn't think twice about it when she shrugged on Lexa's flannel up from last night. Lexa threw a t-shirt and boxers on and turned around to face Clarke. She looked at her in shock seeing Clarke wearing her shirt.

 

“I can take it off.” Clarke offered warily because of the look Lexa was giving her. Lexa was standing on the other side of the room, gaping at her. All Clarke was wearing was her blue flannel and underwear. Warmth spread across Lexa's cheeks at seeing Clarke in her clothes.

 

“No, no, no,” Lexa rushed out. “It's just, you look so good in it.”

 

Clarke smiled widely at her. They both went to brush their teeth before heading downstairs.

 

Lexa pulled out various items to make breakfast before excusing herself.

 

“Do you think you can start? I want to call Gracie real quick.” Lexa said. Clarke nodded in understanding. She opened up the egg carton as Lexa left the room.

 

She came back a few minutes later with a happy smile on her face.

 

“I'm guessing everything is good?”

 

“Mhm,” Lexa smirked against the back of Clarke's neck. “Gracie’s alive and well, and you look extremely sexy in my shirt.”

 

Lexa slowly licked the shell of Clarke's ear pulling a soft moan from the blonde.

 

“I'm cooking the eggs, Lexa.” Clarke warned lightly.

 

“Well, then,” Lexa hummed in her ear, slowly trailing her hand down her stomach. She didn't stop until she was inside Clarke's underwear, and the blonde widened her stance, granting Lexa access. “You better not burn them.”

 

“Lexa!” Clarke protested. “Can't I turn the stove off?”

 

“No,” Lexa said stubbornly. “I want eggs.”

 

Lexa waited a second before slipping her fingers through Clarke. The blonde gasped loudly, falling back into Lexa's chest.

 

Lexa didn't waste any time sinking her fingers in and setting a steady rhythm of pumping them in and out. Lexa held on tight to Clarke as the aroma of eggs filled her nostrils. Clarke was stiff against her while flipping the eggs as best she could with Lexa's fingers knuckle deep inside her.

 

Clarke shut her eyes tightly for a second before they flew back open.

 

“They're done.” Clarke said with a shaky breath. Lexa nodded against her, giving Clarke permission to turn the stove off. They stayed where they were. Clarke pushed the pan to the warming center.

 

Lexa's fingers were working furiously in her. Lexa's wrist was aching at the awkward angle, but the wide gap between Clarke's legs gave her plenty of room to work.

 

Clarke leaned her head against Lexa's shoulder, moaning deeply. Lexa whined at how wet Clarke was. Her hand was getting drenched. They both listened to the slick noise of Lexa's fingers pumping in and out before the blonde started moving her hips desperately in time with Lexa's thrusts.

 

“I'm gonna cum.” Clarke confessed around a gasp. Lexa moaned against her, kissing the base of her neck.

 

Lexa listened to the way Clarke's breath hitched before clamping down around her fingers. Clarke rested her hands on the counter, riding her orgasm out. Lexa helped her by softly thrusting her fingers inside. She moaned at the way Clarke's soaked her fingers in her release.

 

Lexa held Clarke tight until she could stand on her feet again. She slowly pulled out and licked her fingers clean.

 

“Well,” Clarke drawled out through heavy breaths. She was trying to compose herself, but was failing miserably. “That was a nice way to start the day.”

 

“I was trying to win you over.” Lexa teased behind her.

 

Clarke whipped around with a playful glint in her eye.

 

“It might've worked.” Clarke shrugged. Lexa went to go wash her hands while Clarke dished the eggs out on two plates.

 

“I’d like to make the pancakes now. Are you going to go down on me anytime soon or will I be able to work in peace?” Clarke sassed.

 

“Please,” Lexa scoffed, handing over a whisk to Clarke so she could stir the batter. “You'd be begging me to fuck you.”

 

Clarke stayed silent, not giving Lexa the satisfaction of hearing her answer. Lexa leaned against the counter and scarfed down her eggs in record time.

 

"You're not going to wait for the pancakes?" Clarke asked. Lexa thought she looked beautiful in her post orgasm state. Her cheeks were flushed, her hair was wind swept, and no matter how hard she tried, her breathing kept coming in short.

  
"I can just eat them after," Lexa shrugged. "I was hungry. I worked up quite the appetite last night."

 

They shared a knowing look before Clarke whipped up some pancakes. After they finished eating, they went upstairs to get ready for the day.

  
  
"I have nothing to wear." Clarke said walking into Lexa’s bedroom.

  
  
"You can borrow some of my clothes." Lexa offered softly. She was following Clarke into her room and heading to her dresser.

 

“Here,” Lexa said thrusting a pair of leggings in Clarke's face. “Wear these.”

 

“Any chance I could wear my dress? Not that it's clean or anything.” Clarke sighed.

 

“Exactly. They might be a little tight, but should fit.”

 

Clarke sighed in defeat. “Okay.”

 

“You can shower and then I'll shower after you.”

 

Clarke agreed heading towards the bathroom. Lexa changed the sheets on her bed while Clarke showered. Lexa smirked at the mess they’d made and made a note to wash the sheets when she got home later.

 

When Clarke emerged from her shower, she was fully dressed and looked lovely.

 

“How do they fit?” Lexa asked. She stripped her clothes off, and Clarke gawked at her.

 

“Just fine. They're a little tight though.” Clarke clearing her throat. She walked over to the shoes, Lexa had offered her. Lexa bit her lip, her eyes narrowing on her ass.

 

“They make your ass look great.” Lexa purred, appearing behind Clarke.

 

Clarke flashed her a dirty smirk before pulling her shoes on.

 

“Go take your shower so we can go,” Clarke playfully pushed her towards the bathroom. “And watch out. That can poke an eye out.” Clarke pointed down to her dick that was moving as Lexa walked to the bathroom.

 

“Oh, I will.” Lexa flirted before closing the door behind her.

 

When Lexa finished her shower, she put her gym clothes on. She was wearing basketball shorts and a blue Nike shirt. Clarke was sitting on the bed while Lexa pulled her shoes on. When Lexa was done, she motioned to the door.

 

“I feel like we’re heading to my death or something.” Clarke groaned, walking downstairs.

 

Lexa shushed her and grabbed her keys off the counter. She hid her smile as they walked out the door.

* * *

 

“Clarke, you're going too high!” Lexa called out.

 

“I'm fine, Lexa!” Clarke said, determination laced in her voice.

 

Lexa watched in absolute embarrassment as Clarke tried to scale the wall. Lexa was a pro around here. People normally looked at her for help, and the fact Clarke was doing horribly, made her cheeks flush.

 

She didn't think the blonde would be _this_ terrible. Lexa hung her head in shame, but she couldn't pretend she wasn't with Clarke, they’d walked in together. The blonde grunted and groaned with her movements, and Lexa was _embarrassed_.

 

“Well, well, well,” Lexa heard a deep voice behind her. “Who's the blonde?”

 

Lexa was a local at the rock climbing facility. She came in here on a regular basis. She knew all the staff and most of the regulars here as well. Most of the employees whipped their heads around when they saw a blonde hanging off Lexa arm.

 

“Just a friend.” Lexa answered Gustus. He was the manager of the place and they’d quickly bonded because Lexa was always here.

 

“She's awful.” Gustus commented, making Lexa glare at him. Only Lexa could think things like that, nobody else.

 

“She is! I'm surprised she's still up there.” Gustus said.

 

“She's up there because she's stuck.” Lexa answered with a snort. She contemplated whether or not she should leave Clarke there and start climbing herself. Clarke had decided to not be harnessed which was stupid. She claimed that she didn't need to be, and it was out of fashion. Lexa had no idea how she was going to get down.

 

“I can go get her.” Gustus suggested. Lexa was getting ready to thank him, when she saw him eyeing her appreciatively.

 

“Gustus!” Lexa smacked him hard on the shoulder.

 

“What?” Gustus shrieked. “I'm simply admiring. _Please_ tell me you're hitting that.”

 

“The only thing I'm going to hit is you!” Lexa roared. “Stop staring at her like she's a piece of meat.”

 

“Is she single?” Gustus pressed.

 

Lexa pinched the bridge of her nose, turning her attention back to Clarke.

 

“I can hear you guys, you know!” Clarke shouted down at them.

 

“Clarke,” Lexa sighed out in annoyance. “Get down here!”

 

“No!” The blonde said back. “I'm not moving from this spot. I'm not stuck. I'm just taking a break.”

 

“You can't hold on forever.” Lexa said with amusement.

 

“Watch me!” The blonde yelled back stubbornly.

 

Lexa sighed in relief when Gustus walked away to tend to other customers. Lexa stood with her hands on her hips. She couldn't lie. She was enjoying the view a lot, but wished the blonde would move.

 

Clarke was starfished out on the wall, and Lexa waited patiently for her to move. Or at least, she was trying.

 

“Come on, Clarke. Just move some part of your body.” Lexa suggested.

 

Clarke didn't move an inch when she replied.

 

“I would if you didn't wear me out last night!” Clarke hissed loudly. Lexa's face flushed red, glad that only a few people had heard.

 

“Why don't you talk a little louder?” Lexa rolled her eyes. She waited a few more minutes in silence. Clarke didn't say anything nor did she move. Lexa waited another minute before Clarke finally said something. Lexa knew how stubborn Clarke was. She knew she could easily climb up the wall to get her, but she wanted the blonde to admit it.

 

“Okay,” Clarke sighed heavily. “I'm stuck.”

 

Lexa grinned at the blonde's confession. She had been trying to prove she wasn't stuck this whole time and Lexa finally got her to admit it.

 

“Would you like some help?” Lexa teased.

 

“Come up here and get me, please.” Clarke whined.

 

Lexa laughed wholeheartedly before scaling the wall effortlessly. Clarke gaped watching Lexa move with ease. She was by Clarke's side in a matter of minutes.

 

“Only you would get stuck this high up and say you wouldn't need a harness. I should've never listened to you.”

 

“I can be very persuasive.” Clarke said lowly. The blonde had her hair up in a ponytail and was sweating with the effort of holding herself up.

 

“Okay, listen to my instructions very carefully.” Lexa demanded.

 

“What if I don't?” Clarke asked.

 

“Then you're going to get hurt.”

 

Clarke sighed deeply, giving into Lexa.

 

“Put your foot on the red one.” Lexa instructed. Clarke looked down and squealed, when she saw how far away it was from her.

 

“No way!” Clarke shook her head.

 

“I'm going to leave you up here if you don't cooperate.” Lexa threatened.

 

“Wait!” Clarke begged. “Please, don't leave me.”

 

Lexa noted how vulnerable Clarke sounded right now. She couldn't help but give into her.

 

“I'm not going to Clarke, but you'll never get down if you don't move.” Lexa said softly. She sighed in relief when Clarke finally listened to her.

 

“Put your foot on the red, your hand on the blue and slowly work your way down.” Lexa said. She was moving with the blonde. Clarke was panting as she moved slowly down the wall. She was scared, but kept moving.

 

“You're doing fantastic, Clarke.” Lexa praised. The blonde was already halfway down.

 

Clarke sighed happily when her feet came into contact with the ground. Lexa wasn't too far behind. She messed around for a bit, knowing that Clarke was safely on the ground again.

 

“You're like a spider monkey!” Clarke said in awe once Lexa finally got down.

 

“And you're terrible at climbing things.” Lexa snorted out a laugh.

 

“I'm very great at riding things. That's all that matters.” Clarke huffed. Lexa stumbled over her footing, glad they were alone.

 

“Christ, Clarke,” Lexa chastised. “Must you say things like that in public?”

 

“I like having the last word.” Clarke shrugged.

 

“I can see that,” Lexa replied. “So, do you want to go again?”

 

“Oh, hell no!” Clarke exclaimed, grabbing a hold of Lexa's arm and dragging her towards the entrance. Lexa let it happen, laughing the whole way to her car. “What I want is a nice big pizza and to see Gracie.” Clarke said.

 

Lexa unlocked the doors before they got in.

 

“You want to see Gracie?” Lexa asked with a small smile.

 

“If you'll let me.”

 

“Could you wait in the car while I get her? I just don't want Costia's parents to- I don't want them to-” Lexa huffed, getting frustrated with herself. “I don't want-”

 

“Lexa!” Clarke raised her voice to get her attention. “I'll wait in the car.”

 

Lexa started her car, before cursing.

 

“On the phone this morning, I promised to take her to the park.” Lexa said slowly. She was already preparing for the rejection, but to her surprise, it didn't come.

 

“Okay,” Clarke said with a smile. “We could eat and then take her there.”

 

“Okay.” Lexa nodded dumbly.

 

They rode in silence to Costia's parents house. Lexa's heart was thumping in her chest. She hoped Charlotte wouldn't come outside. It wasn't that Lexa didn't want them to meet Clarke, it was because she wasn't ready yet. She had no idea how she would even introduce Clarke.

 

“Okay, I'll be right back.” Lexa said once they pulled into the driveway. She kept the engine running before getting out.

 

“Okay.” Clarke replied.

 

Lexa hoped she appeared casual when she knocked on the door. It took a few minutes for the door to come flying open, and Gracie to come in view.

 

“Baby!” Lexa exclaimed. Gracie squealed loudly at seeing her mother.

 

“Mowwy!” Gracie ran up to Lexa and the brunette picked her up, spinning her around in her arms.

 

“Here's her stuff.” Charlotte said with a warm smile.

 

Lexa grabbed her stuff returning a smile. Lexa was getting ready to turn around when Charlotte stopped her.

 

“Gracie kept running around the house asking for a Cwarke.” Charlotte’s voice went up a few notches, imitating Gracie's voice. Lexa's eyes widened and she blushed bright red.

 

“Clarke,” Lexa corrected. Gracie immediately started looking around for her when Lexa said her name. “She's just a friend.” Lexa explained quickly, seeing the questioning look on the older woman's face.

 

“Your windows may be tinted, Lexa, but that doesn't mean I can't see through the windshield. I see a woman in your passenger seat.” Charlotte said, giving Lexa a pointed look.

 

Lexa sighed, her shoulders sagging, knowing she had been caught.

 

“She's just a friend.” Lexa said weakly, not really knowing what to say.

 

“If she's just a friend, then why don't you introduce me?” Charlotte asked. Lexa chewed her bottom lip, thinking of all the ways this could go horribly wrong.

 

“Okay,” Lexa sighed again. She knew she wasn't going to win against the older woman. “I'll go get her.”

 

Lexa swiftly turned on her heels, Gracie in her arms, as she went to get Clarke. The blonde gave her a questioning look seeing Lexa approaching her.

 

“You’ve been spotted!” Lexa hissed once Clarke rolled the windows down.

 

Clarke's eyes widened in fear.

 

“You can't get out of this. Either you go to her, or she comes to you.” Lexa said quickly. Clarke gaped at Lexa before Gracie started reaching for the blonde.

 

Lexa noticed Charlotte's glare when she handed Gracie over to Clarke. They all walked up to the older woman, with their heads high.

 

Clarke stretched her hand out as soon as they reached her.

 

“Clarke Griffin.” Clarke nodded to the woman. Charlotte looked at Clarke's hand for a second before shaking it.

 

“Charlotte Waters. My granddaughter has been calling for you non stop.” Charlotte explained to the blonde.

 

“Is that right?” Clarke cooed, rubbing Gracie's back affectionately.

 

“I was telling Charlotte how we’re friends.” Lexa said pointedly, placing her hands behind her back.

 

“We are.”

 

“I've never seen you before.”

 

“We recently started hanging out.” Clarke answered. Charlotte raised her eyebrows, locking her eyes on Lexa.

 

“So, this has been fun,” Lexa stated, clasping her hands together. “But we’re getting lunch then taking her to the park.”

 

“We? As in both of you?” Charlotte asked, looking between the both of them.

 

“Yes.” Clarke answered for the both of them.

 

“Why don't you put Gracie in her car seat so I can talk to my daughter in law?” Charlotte asked Clarke with an overly sweet smile.

 

“Sure.” Clarke said. She didn't want to get in the way of whatever was going on between the two women. She had a feeling she was the cause of it.

 

Charlotte blew kisses to Gracie, who blew them back, before Clarke walked off.

 

“Charlotte!” Lexa hissed.

 

“What?” Charlotte glared back at Lexa. Normally, Charlotte was a sweet lady. Lexa was confused why Charlotte was being so cold towards Clarke. Lexa saw Charlotte watching Clarke strap Gracie in, and throw daggers at the back of her head, before it finally clicked.

 

“Anya told you.”

 

“Damn right she told me.” Charlotte responded, not taking her eyes of Clarke. “So, this is the girl you're sleeping with?”

 

“Well, yes.” Lexa answered weakly. Charlotte sighed deeply.

 

“Do you see yourself pursuing a relationship with her? Anya told me she's getting married.” Charlotte said.

 

“She wants to call the wedding off, but it's complicated.”

 

“She seems like a lovely woman, but if she hurts you and Gracie-”

 

“Charlotte,” Lexa cut her off. “I know.”

 

“I don't think she does.” Charlotte said warily.

 

“I don't know what either of us are doing, but I like hanging out with her and so does Gracie. She makes me and my daughter happy. She even went around calling her name all day.” Lexa chuckled lightly.

 

“Just be careful,” Charlotte sighed. She pulled Lexa in for a hug before releasing her. “You'll always be family no matter what. I want you to be happy, Lexa. I just don't want to see you get hurt. We’re still recovering, no matter how long it's been.”

 

“I know. Thank you. You know you'll always be family too.”

 

“Oh, that reminds me, your mom called.”

 

Lexa's face paled at the mention of her mother. She hadn't seen her since Costia died. They hadn't been in contact that much since she left.

 

“Did she?”

 

“You haven't been contacting her?” Charlotte asked knowingly.

 

“She hasn't contacted me.” Lexa said stubbornly holding her chin high.

 

“Call your mother, child,” Charlotte huffed, her southern accent spilling out with her words. "She would like to hear from you and Gracie." 

 

“Okay, I will,” Lexa promised. “I should get going.”

 

“Be careful,” Charlotte muttered. “And I'm not talking about driving.”

* * *

 

“I need to change her before we go.” Lexa informed Clarke.

 

They both agreed to order the pizza to be delivered to Lexa's instead of picking it up. Lexa blushed bright red when they all sat around the table. She avoided Clarke's eyes, because she knew the blonde would be smug about it.

 

“Would you like to change her?” Lexa asked.

 

“Absolutely not!” Clarke shook her head. “Say mommy has it under control doesn't she?” Clarke cooed to Gracie who smiled happily.

 

“You can't be serious.” Lexa deadpanned, kneeling to the floor.

 

“I've never changed a diaper before in my life.” Clarke replied, her eyes full of fear.

 

“All you have to do is take it off, wipe her down, put on a new one and wash your hands.” Lexa walked through the steps, but Clarke was still shaking her head.

 

“You should do it.”

 

“I think it would be easier if we were at her changing table, but the mat works just fine,” Lexa answered. “Here you go.” Lexa handed over the diaper ignoring Clarke's words.

 

Clarke took it with shaky hands before unhooking Gracie's diaper. Lexa stifled her giggles before stopping the blonde.

 

“Okay, a fair warning,” Lexa said lightly making Clarke groan. “Ever since Gracie was a baby, she likes to pee when air hits her… you know.”

 

“Are you serious?” Clarke exclaimed making Lexa erupted in laughter.

 

“Some will just trickle out and then she'll stop and you can wipe her up.” Lexa said. Clarke grunted before focusing on her task.

 

Lexa held her breath as Clarke opened the diaper. Her daughter peed a little bit before Clarke quickly wiped through her. Lexa watched in amusement as Clarke tried to put the diaper on backwards.

 

“Clarke!” Lexa scolded. “It's on the wrong way! Why didn't you put it on the way I gave it to you?”

 

“It was folded when you gave it to me!” Clarke argued. “I don't know which way it goes.”

 

“You see the number 4 and the logo on the diaper? That's the front of it. Turn it around.” Lexa instructed. “And hurry up before she really pees.”

 

Clarke squealed in fear, quickly turning the diaper around correctly. Gracie just laid against her changing mat watching Clarke change her diaper terribly.

 

“I would've been done five minutes ago!” Lexa commented.

 

“I don't need the pressure, Lexa.” Clarke grunted.

 

“I like watching you squirm.” Lexa hummed with a smirk. Clarke shot Lexa a dirty look before focusing on putting Gracie's diaper on.

 

“Okay, it’s on. Now what?” Clarke asked.

 

“Stand her up and pull her pants up.” Lexa said slowly, as if it was obvious and Clarke had the decency to blush.

 

“That was amazing. I wonder how your co-workers feel working with someone so clumsy.”

 

“Hey!” Clarke scoffed. “You take that back.”

 

“You can't even change a simple diaper.” Lexa answered. Clarke frowned cleaning her mess up, and going into the kitchen to wash her hands.

 

“You're being mean.” Clarke pouted. Lexa rolled her eyes lightly at her. Gracie was on the floor playing with her dolls.

 

“Come on, Grace. Time to go to the park.”

 

Gracie put her toys away quickly before running up to her mom.

 

“Park!” Gracie nodded happily.

 

They all walked out the door after Lexa grabbed Gracie’s diaper bag. Lexa put Gracie down as they walked down to the park.

 

“Charlotte told me, my mom called.”

 

“Oh, really?” Clarke asked curiously.

 

“I haven't seen my mom since Costia died,” Lexa said softly. Gracie was walking in front of them, picking up every rock she found. “Charlotte told me she called.”

 

“Where is she?” Clarke asked.

 

“LA. That's where I was born. We moved here because her work was here, but she wanted to escape the town. I decided to stay back.”

 

“Why haven't you talked to her?” Clarke asked.

 

“She's very… demanding. Everything I did with Gracie was wrong. I admit at first I wasn't good at being a single parent after Costia had passed. I was a mess and she came to help me out, until she couldn't take anymore time off work. I haven't really talked to her because she's just…”

 

“I understand. That's how my mom is. She just hovers over everything. Will you call her though?”

 

“I guess. Just so she knows everything is okay.”

 

“Gracie is doing great. She’s very well mannered. I'd be proud.” Clarke said, running her hands along Lexa's forearm. Lexa could feel goosebumps on her skin, even though it was humid outside.

 

“Thank you.” Lexa said with a smile.

 

They walked in comfortable silence the rest of the way until they reached the park. Gracie immediately took off running for the slides. There was only one other family here, and they were playing out in the field. Gracie was running all around the playground.

 

“This is great for tiring her out before bedtime.” Lexa said with a smile. They sat side by side watching Gracie slide down the slides.

 

“I can see that. She's a ball of energy.”

 

“I want to take you somewhere next weekend.” Lexa said, locking eyes with Clarke. Her eyes were so blue in the evening sun.

 

“Where?” Clarke asked hesitatingly.

 

Lexa smiled brightly at Clarke before standing up.

 

“You'll just have to wait and see!” Lexa said before running over to Gracie. Lexa quickly picked her up and whispered something in her ear.

 

“Lexa Woods! You better tell me where you're taking me! It could be my grave again!” Clarke called walking over to them.

 

“Come wit us to the zwoo.” Gracie said. Clarke's eyes widen looking at Lexa.

 

“Not a chance in-”

 

“My daughter!” Lexa shrieked putting Gracie down, who started running around again.

 

“Hell.” Clarke whispered.

 

“Why not?” Lexa asked folding her arms.

 

“It's gross and it stinks!” Clarke reasoned.

 

“You haven't been to the zoo in ages! I'm taking you! It's free. Who's going to pass that up?” Lexa asked.

 

Clarke huffed, turning around and watching Gracie have fun.

 

“She wants you to come with us.” Lexa said honestly, walking up to Clarke. The blonde gasped when Lexa pressed against her.

 

“It'll be fun.” Lexa placed an open mouthed kiss to Clarke's neck. “You'll have fun.”

 

“The zoo isn't fun.”

 

“Then don't go.” Lexa purposely rocked against Clarke, making the blonde gasp again.

 

“If you're trying to seduce me like you did with the rock climbing-”

 

“The sex we had last night was not me trying to seduce you. I just can't control myself around you. I'm like some horny teenager.”

 

“I guess that makes two of us.” Clarke confessed in her ear. Clarke's voice was low which made Lexa shiver.

 

“What do I have to do to get you to go, though?” Lexa asked, placing her hands on Clarke's hips. “I'll do anything.”

 

“Anything?” Clarke asked with a glint in her eye.

 

“Anything.” Lexa groaned into her ear, waiting for Clarke to speak.

 

“I want you,” Clarke stopped talking. The words alone made Lexa's heart stop. “To push me on the swings.” Clarke pulled away from Lexa and the brunette gaped at her.

 

“That's it?” Lexa asked in disappointment.

 

“Yes,” Clarke answered. “That's it. Come on!” Clarke said excitedly.

 

Lexa sighed. Clarke never ceased to amaze her. Gracie ran with her mother towards the swings. She reached for Clarke to pick her up and put her on her lap in the swing. Lexa started pushing both of them.

  
  
"Gracie, good news," Lexa said with a conniving smile. "Clarke's coming with us to the zoo."

  
  
The blonde held on tight to Gracie as she turned around looking at Lexa in disbelief.

  
  
"I agreed to no such thing." Clarke scoffed.

  
  
"Gracie do the pout." Lexa said, stopping the swings and coming around to face them.

  
  
Gracie turned her head towards Clarke, tilting it sideways and poking her lip out. Clarke's eyes widened, letting out a gasp.

  
  
"Now, that's just mean!" Clarke exclaimed. "Look at that pout, and those chubby cheeks!"

 

“Anyone who can say no to that face is just heartless.” Lexa proclaimed.

 

“Well,” Clarke huffed before putting Gracie down. She stood up gazing into Lexa's bright green eyes. “Haven't you heard?”

 

“You're not heartless. I know you're not.” Lexa said, watching Gracie run up the stairs to the play tower.

 

“I cheated on my fiancé.” Clarke reasoned.

 

“Who was cheating on you with your best friend.”

 

“Does that make us even? Does that make me the better person?” Clarke asked folding her arms.

 

“You're not a bad person.” Lexa mumbled.

 

“Maybe I do have some soul searching to do. I think I need to plant that tiny seed called life and start growing,” Clarke said, her voice thick with emotion. “I'll go with you.”

 

“Really?” Lexa asked with wide eyes.

 

“Yes,” Clarke chewed on her bottom lip. “I'd be a fool not to. I love spending time with you both.”

 

“Us too.” Lexa replied.

 

Lexa spent the rest of the evening chasing Clarke around. They were playing silly games with each other. If the other person came too close, they’d run away. Lexa caught Clarke a couple times, placing a kiss on her cheek every time.

 

Lexa smiled playing around with her daughter. Gracie was having a blast running around with Clarke. Well, Gracie ran, while Clarke walked fast behind her.

 

Lexa was having a hard time keeping her eyes off Clarke. Clarke's hair blew in the wind. The leggings were skin tight against her legs making her butt poke out deliciously. Her blue eyes were bright while talking to Gracie, only to turn mischievous when Lexa got too close.

 

The sun was setting behind them, the clouds moved over the sun, casting the perfect lighting for all three of them. Lexa had a hard time figuring out who had the better view, Clarke or the sunset.

 

It was Clarke (It was always Clarke).


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the wait, y'all!
> 
> Warning: There's some sin at the end

Clarke was startled awake when she felt added weight on top of her. Clarke's blue eyes met big brown eyes boring into hers.

 

“Cwarke!” Gracie squealed. Clarke looked around confused before finally locking eyes with Lexa.

 

“Rise and shine!” Lexa said from behind Gracie. She was holding a tray of food in her hands.

 

“You made me breakfast in bed. I figured it was only fair if I return the favor.” Lexa said sheepishly. Clarke placed a kiss on Gracie’s cheek earning her a wide smile. Gracie got off Clarke, settling against her side.

 

“I'm guessing you guys already ate?” Clarke asked groggily, sitting up.

 

“Yup, and bathed.” Lexa added.

 

Gracie cuddled into Clarke's side cutely. Lexa gave Clarke a questioning look, before the blonde subtly waved her off. Lexa turned the TV on to a kid friendly show, while slipping in bed with them.

 

If someone had told Clarke that she would be cuddled up in bed with a two year old and a girl she was sleeping with, Clarke would've laughed in their face. The thought made her frown, but it was the truth. She wasn't a family woman, but there was no place else that she would rather be today. (That thought also scared her, but she wouldn't think about that right now).

 

“I have one condition if we go to the zoo today.” Clarke spoke up, trying to distract herself from her thoughts.

 

“Is it a kid friendly condition?” Lexa asked quickly. Clarke rolled her eyes at her.

 

“Of course it is,” Clarke said, before pausing for a moment. “I do have another condition, but we can talk about that later.” Clarke husked.

 

“What's the condition?” Lexa asked curiously.

 

“I’d like to go home and get ready there.”

 

Lexa let out a chuckle at such a simple request.

 

“That can be arranged.”

 

They waited until Clarke was finished eating to pack everything up. Lexa prepared Gracie's diaper bag, slipping her sippy cup in it before heading out the door.

 

“Try not to take five years.” Lexa teased once pulling into Clarke's driveway.

 

“Yeah, yeah.” Clarke waved her off before heading inside.

 

* * *

 

 

Clarke's face scrunched up the minute they got there. Gracie hopped up and down happily before getting in her stroller.

 

“Try not to look so disappointed.” Lexa deadpanned.

 

“I'm happy to be here with you.” Clarke mustered up a sweet smile. Lexa started walking towards the entrance, Clarke looping her arm with Lexa's. The brunette’s heart rate went up. She remembered when Costia used to do that all the time. Lexa found herself liking the contact from Clarke.

 

“Thanks.” Lexa said as they walked through the entrance.

 

They stopped once they got inside, they were all looking around. Gracie immediately started pointing in every direction which made them both laugh.

 

They headed for the elephants in the corner. Clarke reluctantly followed them, locking her arm tightly with Lexa's again.

 

They had seen a couple animals before Clarke started checking her phone often. Clarke would roll her eyes, sigh and throw her phone back in her purse.

 

“You okay?” Lexa asked quietly. They were walking side by side and Clarke was frowning down at her phone.

 

“It's just my mother being her annoying self. I'm okay. These zebras are pretty cute.” Clarke said motioning towards the animal. Lexa smirked at her before getting Gracie out.

 

“Did you just call an animal cute?” Lexa mocked.

 

“Yes. They're kind of cute.” Clarke said before holding her hand out. “Stay just like that!”

 

Lexa looked at Clarke in confusion. Lexa was holding Gracie around her hip, with the zebras behind them. Lexa caught on to what Clarke was doing when she pulled her phone out again.

 

“Look Gracie! Say cheese!” Lexa said pointing towards the camera before putting her arm down.

 

“Cweese!” Gracie said looking directly at the camera and Lexa was smiling softly at Clarke more than the camera. Clarke smiled widely before snapping a picture of both of them.

 

“That was cute.” Clarke commented before Lexa put Gracie back in her stroller.

 

They continued walking around exploring the place. Gracie had them stop for almost every animal, but neither one of them cared. They were happy to walk around with Gracie and forget their problems for a while.

 

There was something Lexa wanted to get off her chest, but didn't know if Clarke wanted to hear about it. It overloaded her thoughts more these days, and looking around at all the children here, only spurred it on.

 

“I've been thinking about something recently.” Lexa murmured, breaking the comfortable silence they were in. She looked at Clarke briefly before looking ahead at the giraffes. Clarke gave her a curious look, but waited for Lexa to talk.

 

“Are you going to elaborate or am I going to have to figure out what's going on up there?” Clarke leaned against the stroller raising her eyebrows at Lexa.

 

“I've been thinking about putting Gracie in a daycare or preschool,” Lexa rushed out making Clarke's eyes go wide. “I think about it a lot. She should be somewhere with other kids around her age. She should be somewhere more educational. I know Costia's parents teach her a lot, but I just want more for her.”

 

“So, what's stopping you?” Clarke asked curiously.

 

“I don't know! Money,” Lexa reasoned standing beside Clarke. “What if she doesn't like it? What if the place isn't good enough? What if she cries all day?”

 

“You won't know unless you try it. I'm sure you'll make it work.” Clarke suggested gently, not really knowing her place in this situation.

 

“I guess I'm just scared.” Lexa finally admitted. They started moving again through the seas of people.

 

“Well, if this is what's best for her. If you want some place nice, you should look around, give it a try. If it goes wrong, then she can stay with her grandparents.”

 

“I just don't know what the outcome would be. I don't know if she would like it. I'm scared to leave her all day at a place she doesn't know.”

 

“I'm sure she'll be just fine. Your daughter is strong.”

 

“Thank you.”

 

They stopped to look at the monkeys. Lexa got Gracie out of her stroller and held her while she admired the monkeys.

 

“I might start looking soon.” Lexa said.

 

“That's a good idea. I know you'll make the right choice on a daycare for her.”

 

Lexa was almost shocked by how supportive Clarke was being. She didn't even know if the blonde wanted to hear any of this, but Clarke didn't look bothered. Lexa offered Clarke a small smile before Lexa suggested they go get ice cream, something Gracie was extremely excited about. They sat down at a small table outside while they ate their ice cream.

 

“My mom’s been blowing my phone up all morning.” Clarke sighed in annoyance looking down at it before throwing it back in her purse.

 

“Have you talked to him?” Lexa asked, glad that Gracie was too busy watching the water fountain and eating her ice cream.

 

“No and I don't plan on it. We still haven't told anyone we’re calling it off.”

 

“But your mom doesn't want you to?”

 

“I won't marry him regardless of what anyone wants. I can't even… Raven was my best friend. She was my-”

 

“It's going to be okay, Clarke.”

 

“It's so embarrassing. How I didn't know this whole time. He was-” Clarke cut herself off, angrily licking around her ice cream cone. Lexa couldn't help but let out a chuckle.

 

“What's so funny?” Clarke huffed.

 

“You look very cute right now.”

 

“I'm not cute.” Clarke scoffed.

 

“Sexy, then.” Lexa said lowly, her eyes twinkled in the bright sun.

 

“That works.” Clarke swallowed hard and nodded weakly.

 

They finished their cones before walking around again. Clarke slipped her hand into Lexa's, and the brunette smiled softly to herself before walking down the path.

 

“I know this probably isn’t my place,” Clarke spoke softly as Gracie pointed to the birds flying around them. “But, I can literally hear you thinking and whatever decision you make, it’ll be the right one. Trust your judgement.” Clarke finished her speech off by placing a soft kiss to Lexa’s palm.

 

“I hope so.”

* * *

 

Finding a daycare for Gracie wasn’t as hard as Lexa thought it would be. A part of her wanted it to be more difficult because she didn’t feel like she was ready for this, but knew this would be better for Gracie’s future. She did spend a few nights with Costia’s parents looking for the right one. She was happy for the help because she didn’t want to bother Clarke with it. She knew they would support her on this decision.

 

She wanted her to have fun with other kids her age and when Lexa found a daycare not even fifteen minutes away with such high reviews, she knew there was no more stalling.

 

She couldn’t keep bringing Gracie to her work, where she was bored out of her mind because there was nothing for her to do. She knew she could always count on Costia’s parents, but she didn’t want to always have to rely on them. Lexa knew that she couldn't keep asking them to watch Gracie while she was at work because she knew they had work to do themselves. Lexa was running out of options because most of her friends worked with her and there was no way she was letting Jasper or Monty look after her. They couldn't even keep their fish alive for a week.

 

When the day finally rolled around, Lexa told Gracie they were going to look at a nice place for her to stay while she was working. After scheduling an appointment with the owner of the daycare, Lexa drove nervously down the street.

 

Lexa sighed deeply before unbuckling Gracie's seat. Costia's parents offered to come with her, but Lexa was adamant on doing it alone. Lexa wanted to go alone because she wanted to prove that she could do this by herself.

 

Lexa smiled at the silly banter of children dancing with monkeys and read the logo of the building: _Polaris Academy._

 

Lexa sighed and held Gracie as they walked inside, knowing they were expecting her around noon. Lexa was a bit tight on time. She had a client soon, but wanted to get this over with.

 

Lexa took a deep breath before walking inside.

 

“Lexa Woods, we spoke on the phone?” Lexa whipped her head around to see a short brunette haired girl with a smile on her face.

 

“Yes, that would be me. Ontari right?” Lexa asked, which the girl nodded. “This is my daughter, Gracie.” Lexa introduced. Gracie hid her head in Lexa's shoulder shyly before offering the girl a tiny wave.

 

“Oh, she's precious.” Ontari gushed.

 

Lexa looked around to all the kids doing a various amount of activities. They were all running around with smiles on their faces.

 

“Right, so shall we get started?” Ontari clasped her hands together. Lexa offered her a small, tenative nod.

 

“Your daughter will be grouped with the younger kids. Ages one to four. Because we do after school care, we do have older kids that come here. Gracie will be staying in this room for the most part. The other rooms are for the bigger kids.” Ontari rambled as they walked around.

 

Lexa was impressed with the place. It was huge and provided endless entertainment, something Lexa wanted Gracie to have.

 

“I know it's never easy putting your child in daycare and you always wonder and worry. Gracie would be in good hands if you choose us. We have an educational program. We’ll sing, dance and teach them the alphabet and the numbers system and other educational things.”

 

Lexa was listening to every word Ontari was saying with rapt attention. They stopped walking once they got to the kitchen. There were long counter tops, with a microwave, fruit and other items tucked away in the corner. It had two huge refrigerators on the other side and long tables in the middle and a few small tables off to the side.

 

“If you do decide to bring Gracie here, she’ll need her own cup, one marked with her name. We are authorized to provide food for your kids and it all goes through my inspector and the FDA. If there is something you would like her to have, you're more than welcome to bring it.”

 

“Do you guys take naps?” Lexa asked curiously.

 

“Yes! We do,” Ontari answered enthusiastically. “They sleep on cots and if there's something special she likes to sleep with, you can bring it. It usually helps them through the week. We have cubbies for all the kids and we’d put everything in there. We have the cubbies up high so no one can steal anything.”

 

They walked out of the kitchen back into the playroom.

 

“This is usually the part where I would tell you to let your daughter go play…” Ontari trailed off. Gracie was holding Lexa tight the whole time. Lexa looked at Ontari warily.

 

“Hold on, Jason!” Ontari called. A young boy with saggy blonde hair ran up to her.

 

“Yes, Miss. Onwari?”

 

“Why don't you take Gracie over there with you guys and let her play with you?” Ontari asked. Jason smiled widely and nodded.

 

Lexa reluctantly put Gracie down. Gracie whined for a second, reaching back for her mom, before Jason grabbed her hand.

 

“Come on!” Lexa watched with a small smile as Gracie made her way over to the other kids.

 

“It's never easy, especially being a single parent. If you have any questions, please ask them.”

 

“This place is amazing. I don't know if I can afford it.”

 

Ontari pressed her lip in a thin smile before answering.

 

“We do offer government assistance to those who can't afford the full price. I will tell you, I know you want to have her here part time, so that will make it cheaper. We can figure it out along the way.”

 

“Thank you. It means a lot. She seems to like it.”

 

“If you are willing to choose us, there’s quite a bit of paperwork you need to fill out before she can officially start.”

 

Lexa looked around the place one more time. There were various teachers helping the little kids with assignments and activities. There were toys and puzzles everywhere you turned.

 

Lexa subtly looked at Gracie and cherished the smile she had on her face. She was glued to the little boy, Jason’s, side. They were both trying to figure out a puzzle.

 

Lexa knew her decision right then and there, but knew her pocketbook wouldn’t agree with her. Lexa wished Costia was here to tell her what to do, but she quickly shook her head. She flicked her eyes over to Ontari’s.

 

“Tell me what I need to fill out.” Lexa said making Ontari grin.

 

* * *

 

 

Clarke heard footsteps approaching her office and almost groaned, had it not been for the fact that she gets paid to deal with crisis’ on a daily basis. 

 

But, Clarke should’ve known something was up because she wasn’t scheduled to meet her last client until 4 and it was currently ten minutes to 3.

 

“Murphy tell whoever that is that I need-“

 

“Ms. Griffin, I mean no disrespect by cutting you off but,” John Murphy, her clumsy, but punctual assistant started rambling. “Your mother is here.”

 

Clarke quickly stopped what she was doing. Her lungs almost regurgitated the water she was drinking before she looked at her expensive computer monitor.

 

She quickly swallowed down her water and looked up. Her mother was standing tall, staring her down. Murphy was standing in front of her with a terrified expression, not wanting to be in the crossfire between the two Griffin women.

 

Clarke squinted up at her mother, wondering what she was doing here. She thought it was clear that she didn’t want to talk to her by avoiding all her phone calls. She pinched her nose, before rather forcibly, dismissing Murphy.

 

“Thank you, Murphy. You know how to show yourself out and if you hear glass being thrown around, I would advise you _not_ to come back. This could get ugly.” Clarke motioned to the door, silently dismissing the scrawny man. Murphy looked between the two Griffins, before awkwardly laughing and dashing out of the door.

 

“Hello, mother.” Clarke spat as she rounded her desk. Abby walked in with her purse clutched to her chest, her face suddenly looking apologetic. Clarke knew that looked all too well. “Whatever apology you’re about to give, you can shove it up-“

 

“I’m still your mother! So, I would watch what comes out of your mouth next.” Abby set her purse down on the chair and the two women were standing toe to toe.

 

“Did you come here to yell at me some more? Because this is my place of business and I’m respected-“

 

“Around here and everyone cowers in fear when I’m within five feet of them. Mostly because no one can get anything done without me being around. I’m important around here so anything you have to say, needs to be at in indoor level.” Abby finished in a monotone. She’d heard this lecture far too many times.

 

“I’m glad you actually listen to me.”

 

“Our relationship was good until you got that tattoo.” Abby muttered, crossing her arms over her chest.

 

“Oh, here we go again!” Clarke exclaimed, throwing her arms in the air.

 

“What happened to inside voices?” Abby raised her eyebrow at her.

 

“This is my office. I’ll do whatever the hell I want.”

 

“Okay, look,” Abby sighed heavily. “I didn’t come here to fight with you.”

 

“So, then what did you come for?” Clarke asked, mirroring her mother's position.

 

“To apologize.” Abby simply stated, looking Clarke directly in her eyes. The tension was too much and Clarke forced her eyes up, looking at the lights in the ceiling.

 

Clarke didn’t say anything and Abby took this as her cue to continue.

 

“I was way out of line, calling you a slut and everything. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have attacked you like that.”

 

Clarke flicked her eyes to her mom’s trying to detect any signs of her lying, but there wasn’t. Her mom’s eyes were the greenest Clarke had ever seen them and knew her mom was being honest.

 

She still didn’t say anything and she had her jaw clenched shut to prevent her from saying anything, because she didn’t want to forgive her mom that easily.

 

“I just..” Clarke thought Abby was going to continue her apology speech, but she should’ve known she had another trick up her sleeve. Clarke was a complete idiot for not seeing it before. She just wanted her mom’s support right now because her emotions were all over the place. She was sadly mistaken.

 

“I just want you to see how wrong you are. Sure, you’re swimming in money right now, but with Finn, you wouldn’t have to worry about buying 4 cars simultaneously. Finn would be able to take care of you for the rest of your life.”

 

“Mom-“ Clarke wanted to stop this before Abby could make assumptions about her life, she thought she already had figured out.

 

“I’m not stupid, Clarke. This town only has two tattoo shops and I highly doubt you went to the one an hour away. That only leaves the local one about 25 minutes away. I know you slept with the owner, Lexa and I kept my mouth shut this whole time. You really think Lexa is going to have the money to financially support you. Not to mention she has a little demon-“

 

“Shut up.” Clarke gritted out, practically growling at her Mom. Abby looked shocked that Clarke cut her off from talking about Lexa’s daughter.

 

“Oh, so now you love kids all of a sudden because you’re fucking her?” Abby asked in an offended tone.

 

“You know nothing about her. She isn’t a demon. She’s very sweet and-“

 

“Oh, my god!” Abby clutched a hand over her heart. “What has that freak done to you?”

 

Clarke finally lost her cool and threw a pen at Abby. It hit her in her chest and Clarke smirked. Abby looked in disbelief before she picked the pen up and chucked it back at Clarke. Luckily for the blonde, she knew her mom would retaliate and ducked, making the pen fly over her desk.

 

“I think we’re done here.” Clarke said breathlessly, getting up from her crouched position.

 

“I can’t believe you involved yourself with a Woods. The whole town will know about this soon enough and they'll tell you that she isn’t good enough for you. She won’t be able to take care of you. She can barely take care of her daughter.”

 

Clarke grunted, glaring Abby down. She couldn’t believe the words her mother was saying without a second thought. Lexa was a fantastic mother and she didn’t deserve the verbal abuse from her mom.

 

“Shut the hell up!” Clarke roared, before storming over to the door.

 

“This is wrong! You’ll figure it out sooner or later. Why do you think you haven’t officially called off the wedding? It’s because you’re still in love with Finn and-“

 

Clarke was trying her hardest to tune out everything her mom was saying, but it was hard. Clarke heard every word her mom was saying as she rushed to the door. She threw it opened and almost smiled at seeing her assistant, standing next to the elevators.

 

Clarke didn’t say anything, but Murphy read her loud and clear. He pressed the elevator button and Abby scoffed at the man.

 

“I guess I’ll see myself out.” Abby held her head high. Murphy looked mortified at the older Griffin coming his way, but he held his ground. He was very familiar of the arguments the two women would always get into, whenever Abby visited.

 

Clarke stood by Murphy and watched her mom leave. Her expression was stone-faced until the elevator closed and her mother was no longer in view.

 

“Murphy,” Clarke said quietly. “Get me the thickest vanilla milkshake you can find and some fries to go with it. My next meeting isn’t until 4 o’clock and I don’t want to be bothered until then. Got it?”

 

Clarke didn’t even allow herself to hear Murphy’s response. She knew he was already halfway out the building trying to find the milkshake for her.

 

There was nothing like her condescending mother visiting her at work. Clarke shook her head and couldn’t wait for the workday to be over.

* * *

 

Lexa was cleaning up after her last client of the day. She’d already sent her employees home since it was Friday and went through the process of locking up.

 

She wasn't quite sure what she was going to do tonight. She knew she didn’t want to be alone, but she also didn't want to break the tradition of Gracie spending the night with Charlotte and David.

 

Next week was when Gracie would officially start at Polaris Academy part time. Lexa was grateful because Gracie was finally going to be around kids her own age and felt like this was a step in the right direction. She just hoped that her daughter would like it too.

 

Lexa was straightening up some papers on her desk, when she heard the door open. Lexa quickly rushed out of her office, preparing to tell whoever was here, that they were closed.

 

The last thing Lexa was expecting was Clarke standing in the entrance wearing a long black coat. Her hair was up in a bun and she was wearing her glasses.

 

Lexa stood frozen in her spot because she wasn't prepared for this. They hadn’t seen much of each other this past week and Lexa was happy that she was here. Lexa cleared her throat and quickly got it together.

 

“I'm sorry ma'am. We’re closed.” Lexa said lowly, running her eyes down Clarke's body, even though it was covered by the coat. Clarke smirked at her before drawing all the blinds closed.

 

“That's funny because this sign says you're open.” Clarke responded, flipping the sign over. “Can you lock the door for me?”

 

Lexa broke her act for a second, rushing to her office to get her keys and locking the door. Lexa put her keys down before leaning in to kiss Clarke. Clarke wrapped her hand around Lexa's neck, pulling her in deeper.

 

“Do you want to know something?” Clarke whispered against Lexa's lips. Lexa guided Clarke back into her office before kicking the door shut. She was kissing her way down her neck, enjoying the way Clarke's breath hitched.

 

“What?” Lexa muttered in her neck.

 

“This week has been so stressful and there's only one thing I want right now,” Clarke murmured into her ear. Lexa moved a couple of papers around to sit Clarke on her desk and stepped in between her legs. “I want you to fuck me however you want.”

 

Lexa licked her way up Clarke's neck, moaning at the sweet, but salty taste. There was that glint in Clarke's eyes that was driving her insane. By the way Clarke was looking at her, Lexa knew Clarke was challenging her.

 

“I think I can do that.” Lexa nodded. Clarke finally opened her coat and Lexa groaned. Clarke was wearing a pink and black corset and Lexa didn't even know where to begin her attack.

 

She started with Clarke's thighs. She placed feverish kisses to them while taking off Clarke's heels. The blonde’s legs were wide open and Lexa groaned because she could already smell her arousal.

 

Lexa smirked as her hands tickled up Clarke’s sides, getting ready to rip off the corset before Clarke smacked her hands away.

 

“Ow!” Lexa mumbled into Clarke’s thigh.

 

“I’m all for kinky sex, but you’re not ripping this corset!” Clarke articulated by pushing Lexa’s hands away again. “It cost me over two-hundred dollars.”

 

“Who pays that much money for lingerie?”

 

“I knew it would come in handy one day.” Clarke spoke lowly before standing up and they both worked on removing the corset gently.

 

As soon as Clarke’s breasts were freed, Lexa rolled her nipple between her fingers.

 

“Lexa, please, fuck me!” Clarke begged before turning around. Lexa’s eyes widened, but she didn’t need to be told twice.

 

She quickly got rid of her pants by pulling them down her thighs. Lexa was too lazy to pull her boxers down all the way. Clarke was spread wide before her, her center glistening and moaning every other second, Lexa didn’t want to waste any more time.

 

Clarke let out a low moan as Lexa slid her dick through her folds. Lexa held onto Clarke’s hips tightly. Her head was spinning with what she was about to do. She couldn’t take her eyes off how good Clarke looked sprawled out over her desk, her legs spread wide and her knuckles gripped tight around the edges of her desk.

 

The second Lexa was finally getting ready to slide into Clarke, her office door busted open.

 

“Hey, boss! Do you want-“ Lexa’s blood ran cold at the voice behind her. Clarke snapped her head up in confusion before they quickly scrambled to get dress.

 

“Oh, my god!” Octavia squealed out, covering her eyes tightly.

 

Lexa had just gotten her pants zipped up when Lincoln came up behind Octavia.

 

“Hey, what’s going-“ Lincoln quickly averted his eyes when he saw the naked state that Clarke was in. Even though her coat was covering her, her bare shoulders and legs were still on display.

 

“I’m so sorry. I forgot my wallet here in my desk drawer and then we were going to invite you to dinner, but it looks like you were getting ready to-“

 

“No!” Lexa said quickly. “ _Please_ , do not finish that sentence!”

 

“We’ll go and let you two continue… _that_.” Lincoln said awkwardly from behind Octavia. Lexa would’ve laughed if it wasn’t for the compromising position her employees just saw her in.

 

Clarke’s hair was disheveled and her breathing was hard. Lexa knew her cheeks were flushed as were Clarke’s.

 

“Wait!” Lexa called to the two. “If you could just not mention this to Anya. That would be great!”

 

“Noted.”

 

“Of course. We should leave now.” Octavia said, her eyes still covered. “I’m never going to recover from this. I liked it better when you weren’t getting laid. No offense, Clarke. Are we still on for coffee tomorrow? That is, if you can walk.”

 

“Octavia.” Lincoln chided. “I’m sorry. Sometimes she doesn’t have a filter.”

 

“We’re still on.” Clarke said with a bashful smile before averting her eyes.

 

“Right, Okay. Cool, bye guys. Have fun.” Octavia waggled her eyebrows and was practically dragged out of the shop by Lincoln.

 

“I’m sorry!” Lexa squealed. “I didn’t even hear them come in.”

 

“It’s alright.” Clarke shrugged nonchalantly. Lexa stuffed her hands in her pocket because she didn’t know if they were going to continue what they started.

 

By the way Clarke was packing up her stuff and throwing her coat on, Lexa didn’t think they were going to. Clarke had been completely silent as she walked towards the door. Lexa was absolutely crestfallen, thinking that Clarke wanted to get out of there as quick as she could.

 

Clarke sized her up for a second before tilting her. Lexa bit her lip softly because she knew that look.

 

“Have you ever had your dick sucked in an alleyway?”

 

Lexa’s eyes went wide and she coughed out a breath. She thought Clarke was going to invite her back to her place, but she was happily mistaken.

 

“I can’t say that I have.” Lexa looked to the ceiling, trying to rack her brain. “I haven’t.”

 

“Well,” Clarke offered her a dirty smile. “Let’s change that.”

 

Clarke held her hand out and Lexa was a fool not to take it. She quickly grabbed a hold of it and they both walked out of the shop as if they didn’t just get caught in a compromising position just moments before.

 

They both walked out of the shop as if they weren’t about to do something so scandalous. It made Lexa feel young again. She remembered sneaking around with Costia while her mom was at work. It made Lexa forget all her problems and she happily followed Clarke out after locking up her shop again.

 

Lexa felt extremely exposed as Clarke pushed her up against the building wall, pulled her pants and boxers down to the floor and slowly dropped to her knees.

 

Lexa cursed softly, placing her hands against the wall. She knew why she never had public sex before, because she was having a hard time keeping quiet, especially when Clarke did that trick with her tongue.

 

She couldn’t help but let out a long, guttural moan when Clarke wrapped her lips tight around the head of her dick. Lexa wrapped a hand around Clarke’s hair, biting down on her lip hard.

 

The alleyway was completely dark, only the street lights from down the street provided them with little light.

 

Lexa let her jaw go slack and another moan escape her mouth. She hoped to god that there wasn’t anyone taking a late night stroll because she knew they would get caught.

 

Clarke didn’t seem worried about getting caught. She noisily sucked her dick, humming softly as she engulfed Lexa repeatedly.

 

Lexa still couldn’t believe she was standing in the alleyway behind her shop, her pants around her ankles and Clarke between her legs. It made her blush furiously.

 

Lexa avoided looking all the way up at the sky, afraid that Costia might be looking down at her disapproving. She threw a quick apology up to the sky, knowing by the way the trees were swaying on this dark, humid night that Costia may not approve of what she was doing.

 

They were pretty adventurous when it came to their sex life, but they both agreed that public sex was a huge no for both of them. Lexa didn’t have enough strength or willpower to decline Clarke’s offer. The slick noises that were sounding around them, were turning her on to no end.

 

Lexa was at a complete lost for words and all she could do was push on Clarke’s head. The blonde mumbled something around her dick that sounded a lot like: _it’s so big!_ Before taking her deeper into her mouth.

 

A few minutes later, Lexa started fidgeting. Her breath was coming in short and she widened her stance. Clarke brought a hand up and started pumping as her tongue toyed with the head of her dick.

 

Lexa couldn’t keep still, knowing that Clarke was naked underneath the long coat made her skin buzz- more than it already was. Her hands were itching to feel Clarke, but she could feel that familiar tingle, telling her that she was getting ready to break.

 

Lexa wished she could say she kept her composure and was quiet about it. There wasn’t a single thing quiet about her release.

 

Clarke twisted her hand around the base of her dick, and sucked the tip in her mouth, before Lexa erupted in her mouth. Lexa’s jaw dropped and she let out a loud moan as Clarke frantically pumped her dick.

 

 _“Clarke!”_ Lexa hissed, having no control over her body movements as her orgasm rushed through her. Her body shook heavily with the last drops of her release and when it became too much, she had to push Clarke away from her.

 

Clarke wiped her mouth and Lexa groaned when she saw some of her cum rolling down her chin. The blonde rushed to her feet before pulling Lexa in for a sweet kiss, as if she didn’t just spend the last eight minutes sucking her off.

 

“Do you-“ Clarke was cut off by loud laughter coming their way. She quickly gestured to Lexa’s pants before the brunette caught on.

 

With shaky hands, she tried to pull her pants up as quick as she could, just in time for a couple of teenagers to pass them in the alleyway. By the looks of it, they had no idea that they were even in the dark alleyway, but Lexa still blushed.

 

“Maybe we should just go back to your place? You know, there wouldn’t be any interruptions and I can do whatever I want with you.” Lexa breathed. She was still getting over the high of her orgasm.

 

“Do tell.” Clarke purred, with a dirty smirk.

 

“Why don’t we go home and find out?” Lexa extended her hand so they could walk around to where her Mustang was.

 

“Give me a little hint.” Clarke rubbed up and down Lexa’s arm, batting her eyelashes at her.

 

Lexa waited for a second, biting her lip and wondering if she was going to take this too far. It’d been a long time since she’d done this and her heart started beating fast in her chest.

 

“Well.” Clarke huffed out, playfully throwing her hands up. She leaned against Lexa’s car as the brunette looked her over again.

 

“Maybe we should use your back door when we get to your house.” Lexa was shaking on the inside, but she managed to keep her voice steady, firm even.

 

“My back door?” Clarke questioned in confusion. “Why would we use-“

 

Clarke cut herself off with a gasp and let out a surprised chuckle.

 

“You want to- I mean you would- _back_ _there_?” Clarke stumbled over her words, making Lexa nervous again.

 

“Only if you want me to. If not, we can walk through the front door.”

 

“We can walk through any door!” Clarke said, a little too excited, but it put Lexa at ease.

 

“Just tell me if you don’t want to anymore.”

 

“Lexa, you act like we’re already in the backyard. We’re standing in the middle of the street and I want to get home so we can walk through the back door.”

 

Lexa held Clarke’s gaze for another minute. The blonde raised an eyebrow, her smirk never leaving her face. Lexa couldn’t believe Clarke agreed to this, but she was relieved that she did.

 

Lexa quickly unlocked the doors and they scrambled into the car as Lexa raced to Clarke’s house. Just for the fun of it, they entered through the back of the house before Lexa raced up the stairs with Clarke.

 

Lexa was getting ready to ask Clarke a question, but stopped when she saw the small tube in her hands. Clarke’s infamous smirk was still on her face and Lexa didn’t waste anytime getting them both naked.

 

Lexa felt like they reached a new level of their relationship after that night, but she wasn’t complaining. (She never could when it came to Clarke Griffin).

 


	16. Chapter 16

 

Clarke walked down the street to the local diner, her heels clicking loudly against the pavement. She had her sunglasses on, hiding the bags under her eyes. To say that she didn’t get any sleep last night, was an understatement, but she couldn’t be mad because they were all for the right reasons.

 

Clarke glanced down to herself briefly, smiling at the fact that her tattoo was on display. It still sent a rush through her, knowing that she did something so unlike her.

 

Clarke weaved in and out of others who were also enjoying their Saturday mornings. She knew the diner would be packed, but she was happy that she was meeting Octavia. The girl was always friendly around her and that was what Clarke needed right now.

 

Clarke was getting ready to enter the busy diner, when her phone rang. She almost cursed when she saw who it was and quickly picked it up.

 

“Jennifer, hi!” Clarke greeted into the phone, cringing at the lecture she knew she was going to get.

 

“You never returned any of my phone calls.” Jennifer’s annoyed voice sounded through the phone. Clarke moved out of people’s way and leaned against the wall.

 

“I know. I know,” Clarke repeated, with a long sigh. “Things have been intense these last few weeks and I’m sorry.”

 

“We’ve been playing phone tag for the past couple weeks now. I really think we need to sit down and talk.”

 

“Yes, I agree. We need to met. I’m free tomorrow for lunch?” Clarke offered.

 

“Yeah, that should work. I’ll see you then, Clarke.”

 

Clarke hung up the phone and made her way inside to meet Octavia. She was very fond of the girl and hoped that they could be friends because Clarke could use one right now. She liked how the shorter brunette never really questioned what she was doing with Lexa, but had a feeling that might change during their breakfast date.

 

Clarke sighed deeply before spotting her towards the front, her eyebrows furrowed as she looked over the menu.

 

“Hey!” Clarke greeted once she got to the table, suddenly nervous. She had no idea what she was going to talk about with Octavia and she kept replaying what happened last night.

 

“Hi!” Octavia said cheerfully. “How was your night?”

 

Clarke groaned in delight as she sat down, which made Octavia bust out in laughter.

 

“That good, huh?” Octavia asked with a knowing smile.

 

“Absolutely fantastic.” Clarke confirmed with a shy nod.

 

“Oh, but spare me the details,” Octavia quickly said. “She’s still my boss after all.”

 

“Oh, I will.”

 

When the waiter approached them, they took a few minutes to order their food before handing the menus back.

 

“I’ve been meaning to ask you about that,” Octavia said and it was as if, she could smell the fear coming from Clarke. “But I won’t be too hard on you like Anya was.”

 

“Oh, okay.”

 

“Well, what do you want to know?” Clarke asked, leaning her arms against the table.

 

Clarke felt small under Octavia’s intense gaze, but she didn’t look away. She waited, her heart pounding and palms sweaty, until the brunette finally spoke.  

 

“You know what?” Octavia asked rhetorically. “We don’t have to talk about it.”

 

Clarke looked Octavia in the eyes. She knew by the soft gaze that the shorter girl was being honest. Clarke raised her eyebrows, but Octavia still didn’t change her mind.

 

Clarke knew right then and there, that she was going to get along with Octavia just fine.

 

“There’s a billion other things to talk to about. I don’t need to address the relationship my boss is in.”

 

“Thank you, Octavia. Really.”

 

“I think we would be really good friends, if we tried.” Octavia offered her a warm smile before the food came out.

 

“I think so too.”

 

Octavia offered her another smile before it was wiped off completely. Clarke looked at her curiously and Octavia tilted her head to the side.

 

“But make no mistake. Lexa has always and will always be one of my best friends and if you hurt her, you have to deal with me.”

 

It was scary how much Octavia’s demeanor changed. One minute the girl was smiling at her and the next she was glaring. Octavia continued to squint her eyes at Clarke until the blonde nodded dumbly.

 

“Yes, of course. I understand.” Clarke reassured her quickly.

 

“Great!” Octavia exclaimed. “Now tell me about this job of yours.”

 

Clarke spent the whole morning hanging out, laughing and chatting with Octavia. She knew they wouldn’t have any problems getting along and the breakfast wasn’t awkward at all.

 

By the end of it, they had agreed to meet again next Saturday. Clarke was beyond excited about it, but kept her cool. She was happy that she could consider Octavia a friend.

 

Even though her morning with Octavia went successfully, Clarke walked down the street, absolutely dreading the meeting she was going to have with Jennifer. She’d been avoiding everything that had to do with Finn, but she knew she needed to get this over with.

 

She needed to tell Jennifer the truth.

* * *

 

Putting Gracie in daycare was such a bittersweet moment. That Monday morning, Lexa realized she couldn’t do it by herself because she couldn’t even make it out the door without crying.

 

Lexa quickly called Anya over and loved how supportive she was being. She even drove them down the block to the daycare. Lexa was grateful because she was a mess the entire time, especially once they pulled up to the daycare. Lexa gathered everything Gracie would need for the day and got her out of her car seat.  

 

“I’m surprised Clarke isn’t here with you.” Anya muttered as they walked down the sidewalk. Lexa squinted her eyes at Anya over Gracie’s head.

 

“She’s busy,” Lexa grunted. “And besides, I don’t want her to see me completely break down.”

 

“She’s going to be fine, which means you’ll be fine too.”

 

“I hate that I have to do this, but I don’t have any other options. Plus, paying for this is literally going to kill me.” Lexa groaned as they walked inside.

 

“I’ll help in any way that I can.” Anya offered with a small smile.

 

“You know I’m not going to ask you to do that.”

 

“This is technically school tuition, which is stored away-”

 

“I’ve dipped into that account too many times. I can figure something out.” Lexa immediately cut her off.

 

“Just a thought.”

 

They walked inside and were met with Ontari. She gave them a wide smile before walking over to them.

 

“She’s totally checking you out.” Anya said around a cough, which made Lexa’s eyes go wide.

 

“She is not.” Lexa softly elbowed Anya in her rib cage before putting Gracie down.

 

“Hello, Gracie,” Ontari said warmly. “Do you remember me?”

 

Gracie looked up to her mom and Anya before offering Ontari a shy nod. Lexa patted Gracie on the shoulder, trying to encourage her to speak up.

 

“Hi.” Her daughter muttered shyly, before reaching for Lexa to pick her back up.

 

“Sweetie, please don’t act like this, because if you cry, then I’ll cry. Do you want that?”

 

Gracie instantly shook her head. “No, mommy!”

 

“You’re going to be a good girl and have a good day?” Lexa asked in her ear. “If you do, we can have ice cream when I come pick you up.”

 

“Can Cwarke come?” Gracie asked quietly. Lexa cleared her throat softly before shaking her head.

 

“She has to work, baby.” Gracie frowned and nodded reluctantly.

 

“But Anya will come with us!” Lexa said enthusiastically.

 

“No, I want Cwarke.” Gracie said stubbornly and Anya had to hold in a few choice words.

 

“If I didn’t hate her before-”

 

“Anya,” Lexa silenced Anya before pulling Gracie’s diaper bag off her shoulder. “Here’s diapers, wipes, her sippy cup and her monkey. She doesn’t sleep without it.”

 

Lexa handed over the stuff to Ontari, as she tried to put Gracie down.

 

“Come on, sweetie. You’re going to have a wonderful day with Ms. Ontari!”

 

“She’s absolutely right!” Ontari answered. “We can do and play anything you want. We’ll even go outside after snack.”

 

“Doesn’t that sound like fun?” Lexa asked with a smile, but Gracie shook her head.

 

“No!” Gracie said as she clung to her mother.

 

“Look, there’s Jason!” Lexa pointed to the blonde haired boy making his way over to them. Gracie’s whole demeanor changed within a course of a few seconds. She immediately popped her head, smiled and waved at him.

 

“She already has a crush?” Anya asked in disbelief, glaring down the boy.

 

“Play nice, Anya.” Lexa said as Gracie finally let her put her down so she could greet the boy. Ontari jumped in, grabbing Gracie’s hand and leading them towards the boy.

 

“First, she doesn’t want to have ice cream with me and instead that bi-”

 

“Anya!” Lexa scolded quietly.

 

“And now, there’s this creepy boy I have to watch out for.”

 

“You’re going to add a little kid to your hit list?” Lexa asked with a chuckle. “You don’t even know him.”

 

“I don’t have to know him.” Anya huffed. Lexa was about to tell Anya that she needed to calm down, but Ontari was making her way back over to them.

 

“She seems to be adjusting just fine. You and your girlfriend can-”

 

“Ew!”

 

“She’s not my girlfriend!” Lexa almost shrieked, which made Ontari blush.

 

“I’m so sorry. I didn’t meant to assume…” Ontari trailed off.

 

“Don’t worry. We are definitely not together though.”

 

“Well, that’s good to know.” Ontari said with a smirk. While the teacher was watching over the kids, Anya shot Lexa a look that screamed: _See!_

 

Lexa shot Anya a warning look and the brunette huffed and straightened up just in time for Ontari to turn back around.

 

“I can go get her so you can say bye.” Ontari stated before she disappeared into the crowd of kids.

 

“I like her.” Anya hummed out with an approving nod. “And she’s very experienced with kids.”

 

“Anya, you like anyone that isn’t Clarke.” Lexa said with an eye roll.

 

“That is true,” Anya agreed. “But Ontari actually likes kids. Do you really think you’re going to end up with someone who doesn’t want kids?”

 

“Anya, shut up!” Lexa grunted, but immediately smiled at the sight of her daughter and despite the tension between the two of them, they both showered Gracie with love before they left.

 

“Are you crying?” Anya asked halfway through the car ride to work.

 

“What?” Lexa tried to play it off. “No!”

 

“Oh my god!” Anya gasped. “You are!”

 

“I already miss her.” Lexa defended herself weakly. “She’s my best friend.”

 

“I think that’s the cutest thing you’ve ever said,” Anya mumbled after a moment. “And the day will be over in no time. Gracie’s probably spending _all_ her time with that Jason boy.”

 

“I suddenly don’t like him very much.”

 

“Adding a little kid to your hit list, you don’t even know him.” Anya mocked her. “She’s definitely going to be a heartbreaker though.”

 

“I’m _so_ not ready for her to grow up.”

 

“You think Jason will be around then?” Anya asked with a chuckle.

 

“Why don’t you shut up and keep your eyes on the road.” Lexa huffed with a playful smile.

 

* * *

 

 

Clarke stared across from her at the notebooks littering the table. She looked up and was met with intense blue eyes.

 

Clarke chewed on her bottom lip. It had been ten minutes since she uttered the words she never thought she would be saying. Jennifer’s eyes were wide, but they also had a look of understanding.

 

Clarke didn’t know where to go from here, but it started with canceling her wedding plans.

 

“So, is this what you really want to do?” Jennifer broke the heavy silence that fell around them. They’d been staring each other down for the past ten minutes. “Look at all of these plans and you just want to walk away?”

 

Jennifer gestured to the table and Clarke sighed deeply.

 

“I’m walking away, but not from you, Jennifer. You’ve become a really important part of my life and I know this comes as a complete surprise, but I don’t want to get married anymore.”

 

“I’m not trying to persuade you in any way. I’m just trying to understand and make sure this is really what you want.” Jennifer sighed heavily.

 

“We both cheated. I don’t know how much my mom has told you. I refuse to marry him, but he still wants a wedding.”

 

“I’ll stick by whatever decision you want to make, but you don’t want this wedding at all? We made a lot of plans, Clarke. We poured so much money into this and you just want to walk away from it? We were getting ready to look at marriage officiants. Do you just want me to call that off? This whole thing?” Jennifer asked confused. She tried to search Clarke’s face to figure out what she was thinking, but the younger blonde was making it hard.

 

“There can’t be a wedding without a bride.” Clarke pointed out, making Jennifer sigh heavily.

 

“I’ll never make you do something you don’t want to. Marriage is a big commitment and if you don’t want to get married, that’s fine. I’m just making sure. Double checking, triple checking, because once I cancel all our future plans, there’s no going back.”

 

Clarke stayed silent and let what Jennifer was saying soak in. She was trying not to, but she would be lying if she said she wouldn’t be mad at all the money they were throwing away. They didn’t even get to the best part of the wedding planning: Picking the right dress. Clarke hated how much time she spent into these wedding plans that weren’t even going to happen.

 

She refused to marry a man just because of how much money he had. Clarke had money, tons of it, and she didn’t need him. It was such a weird thought, but it was true.

 

She knew her mother would kill her for doing this, but she couldn’t keep trying to please her. Abby was a hard woman to please and she couldn’t go through with this. She just couldn’t.

 

“Jennifer,” Clarke called with shaky breaths. “Please, cancel all future plans, I’m calling the wedding off. I don’t care who objects. They can’t have a damn wedding if I’m not there.”

 

Jennifer nodded her head slowly, giving Clarke time to change her mind. Jennifer already knew that Clarke wouldn’t and it was the complete opposite of how Clarke was at the beginning of this. The younger woman was so eager and excited to get married. Jennifer glanced at Clarke and all she saw was how exhausted she was. It broke Jennifer's heart, despite anything Clarke had done.

 

“I’ll always be here for you, Clarke. As a friend, not just your wedding planner. We’ve had a lot of fun planning this and I’m sorry that it didn’t work out.”

 

“My mom is going to kill me.” Clarke groaned as she buried her head in her hands.

 

“If it’s anyone who can handle her, it’s you.” Jennifer reached out and pulled Clarke’s hands away from her face. “If you’re not happy and don’t want to go through with this, you have every right to say no. You have every right to walk away.”

 

“It just hurts knowing that I have to walk away. I can’t be with him and I don’t want to be with him. I wasted _so_ much time focusing on him, that I lost myself and I feel like now, I’m starting to figure out who I really am.”

 

“This world is full of things that are going to try to bring you down. If you feel like you’re starting to get back to your old self, then you need to hold on to that with everything you have,” Jennifer spoke softly. “Fight for your happiness, Clarke. That’s the only thing that matters.”

 

“I will,” Clarke replied with a firm nod. “Even if I have to kick and scream.”

 

“I wish nothing but the best for you.”

 

“Thank you, Jennifer. It means a lot.”

 

“Alright, well I’ll-“

 

They were both interrupted when Clarke’s phone started ringing. Clarke frowned when she saw that her dad was calling. She hadn’t spoken to him much over the past few weeks and had no idea where they stood. She knew her mother was probably saying terrible things about her and didn’t know if her dad was feeding into it.

 

“If you’ll excuse me, I need to take this.”

 

“Of course.”

 

“Daddy, hi.” Clarke said warmly into the phone.

 

“Hey, sweetie. How are you?” Jake asked.

 

“I’ve been better.” Clarke answered after a moment.

 

“We haven’t talked much these past few weeks and I’m sorry for that. They’ve been working me to death and well, the whole wedding thing.”

 

“It’s okay, dad. I understand.”

 

“I was actually calling because your mother wants to have you over for dinner. You and Lexa.”

 

“Me and L-Lexa?” Clarke asked nearly choking on her spit. “Why?”

 

“She just told me to call you and ask if you were up for it.”

 

“That’s gonna be an interrogation and you know it.”

 

“Clarke, honey,” Her dad sighed out. “You don’t know that.”

 

“I would never set Lexa up like that. Tell her no.”

 

“Clarke, she just wants to talk.”

 

“Talk about what?” Clarke huffed. “And of course she’s using you to try to get to me.”

 

“I think it would be helpful.”

 

“Why?”

 

“To get us to understand. We need to meet the girl you’re leaving Finn for.”

 

“I just don’t think this is a good idea,” Clarke said slowly. “Can you give me some time to think about it?”

 

“She wants to have it at the end of the month.”

 

That only gave Clarke two weeks to figure out how to tell Lexa that her mother wanted to meet her. Clarke could think of a million things that could go wrong right now and her head hurt just thinking about it.

 

“Okay,” Clarke sighed. “It was nice talking to you dad, and I’ll let you know our answer.”

 

“Just give it some thought, sweetie. Goodbye, I love you.”

 

Clarke should’ve seen this one coming. Her mother had been too quiet since she came to see her at work. And now, she wanted to have dinner with Lexa and her. Clarke knew this wasn’t going to be a good idea and had no idea how to even tell Lexa. 

 

“I love you too.” Clarke said into the phone before hanging up.

 

“My mom wants to have dinner with me and Lexa.” Clarke muttered as she walked over to the table. Jennifer’s eyes went wide and she was trying to stifle her laughter.

 

“It’s not funny!”

 

“She’s going to murder her!” Jennifer said around a fit of giggles. “You should make sure her will is good to go.”

 

“I know,” Clarke finally agreed. She dropped her head in her hands. “My mom will probably end her and the poor girl won’t even see it coming.”

 

“You don’t have to go.”

 

“And then what?” Clarke questioned. “My mom won’t stop and next thing you know, she’s showing up at her job, interrogating her.”

 

“So, maybe this dinner will be a good thing?” Jennifer offered.

 

“If my mom is going to talk to Lexa. I need to be there.”

 

“Then go.”

 

“Do you think it’s a good idea?” Clarke asked.

 

“Honestly, no,” Jennifer said. “But maybe this needs to happen.”

 

“I think you might be right. I think it’s way too early, but I know my mom isn’t going to stop.”

 

“So, there’s your answer right there.”

 

“I just hope Lexa will be okay with it.” Clarke sighed for the millionth time that meeting.

* * *

 

 

“How’s Gracie liking the new daycare?” Clarke asked as they walked down the street. They were close enough that their shoulders kept bumping into each other.

 

Clarke knew that she should mention that her mother wanted to have dinner with them, but didn’t want to ruin their peaceful evening. Clarke knew there would be other times to bring it up.

 

“She doesn’t cry anymore. So, I take that as a good sign.” Lexa said, holding the door open for Clarke.

 

It was Friday night and Gracie was with her grandparents. Lexa had the night to herself and there was no fighting that she wanted to spend it with Clarke. They were currently at the grocery store because Lexa had next to nothing in her fridge to cook for dinner.

 

“So, what do you want for dinner?” Clarke asked as they walked around the store. “I make a mean beef stew.”

 

“I’d literally eat anything you make.” Lexa responded, catching the eyes of a woman across the aisle. Lexa tried her best not to blush, but the way the woman was looking at her made it impossible.

 

Lexa knew as they made their way around the store, that they should’ve gone to a different one. There were too many locals here and Clarke was starting to notice. Lexa did her best to hide it, but she could feel the tension in Clarke’s shoulders.

 

“Okay, that’s like the fifth girl who has checked you out!” Clarke said angrily after a girl smiled and waved at Lexa.

 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Lexa tried to play it off, but she knew it wasn’t working and was glad they were alone.

 

“It's hard to believe I'm the first girl you gave it up to.” Clarke grunted, picking out the things she needed to make dinner.

 

Lexa was walking beside her, flashing women a polite smile whenever they looked her way.

 

“What makes you say that?” Lexa said, catching the eyes of a woman in the dairy aisle.

 

“Are you serious?” Clarke exclaimed. “These women are practically undressing you with their eyes and I know you like it!”

 

“I never said I liked it!” Lexa defended herself and looked in Clarke’s direction. “I’m just used to it.”

 

“Oh!” Clarke exclaimed again, throwing a box of cake mix in the cart. “So, that makes it better?”

 

“I think you’re overreacting.” Lexa hummed and looked the other way to hide her smirk.

 

“I wish I could walk around the store peacefully without every single girl looking at you like you’re a piece of meat.”

 

Lexa walked a few feet away from Clarke to get some snacks for Gracie for the week.

 

“It sounds to me like you're a little jealous,” When Clarke didn’t answer, Lexa sighed and walked up to her. “I thought it was pretty clear that I only have eyes for you.”

 

“That’s a little hard to believe when you're staring at them back.” Clarke mumbled, not bothering to look at Lexa.

 

Lexa sighed again. She was getting ready to confess something completely embarrassing to Clarke, but she knew the blonde needed to hear it. Lexa wasn’t in any way trying to hurt Clarke’s feelings, but could tell that the blonde was getting upset. She knew in the middle of the snack aisle wasn’t the best place to tell her, but Clarke was still forcibly throwing things in the cart.

 

“I had a chance to sleep with a few of them.” Lexa said, walking up to Clarke and wrapping her arms around her.

 

“Lexa, you better not finish that sentence.” Clarke grunted, trying to get out of her hold.

 

“I think you might want to hear this.” Lexa tightened her hold around Clarke’s waist. The blonde had no other choice, but to stay where she was.

 

“I had a chance to sleep with a few of these girls. As you can see, their attraction is pretty obvious, but I didn’t. No offense to these girls,” Lexa whispered, fearing that they could hear her. “But they just aren’t my type. Sure, they’re pretty, but they weren’t pretty enough for me to sleep with. I slept with you, Clarke. I slept with you.”

 

There was an awkward pause at the end, Lexa had more to say, but she stopped herself. She didn’t know why she did. It was obvious that she slept with Clarke. They both know she did and they’ve been actively sleeping with each other.

 

Lexa slowly pulled away from Clarke and the blonde turned around to look at her.

 

“I-I’m sorry.” Lexa apologized.

 

“No,” Clarke looked at her with soft eyes. “You have nothing to be sorry for. I shouldn’t have attacked you like that.”

 

“I slept with you.” Lexa muttered to herself. Clarke looked at her weirdly, but nodded.

 

“Yes,” Clarke said slowly. “You did.”

 

“After years of not sleeping with anyone.” Lexa continued stunned. She didn’t know why the realization was hitting her so hard. Things had been hectic and she barely thought about what she did with Clarke anymore. She just did it because they both couldn’t help it.

 

And now, Lexa standing in the middle of the snack aisle buying snacks for her daughter with the woman she was sleeping with. A woman who didn’t want kids.

 

Lexa hated how Anya’s words wouldn’t leave her mind and she hated how she was doing this right now. She needed to get it together.

 

“I’m sorry, Lexa. I shouldn’t have said anything.” Clarke winced at her mistake.

 

“There’s a reason why I did,” Lexa admitted, slowly backing away from her. “All these girls, Clarke and I chose you. A woman who doesn’t even want kids.”

 

“Whoa, whoa, Lexa,” Clarke waved her hands around. “Where is this coming from? I said _I’m sorry._ ”

 

“And I think Anya might be right.”

 

“Right. Her.” Clarke said bitterly with a grimace. “If she wasn’t your best friend, I would-”

 

“What are we doing?” Lexa almost wanted to cringe with how demanding that sounded. She knew she put Clarke in the spotlight and hated her timing, but there was no going back. She already asked the question and a part of her wanted to know and another part of her wanted to walk away completely before she gets her heart broken.

 

“I- I- Uhh-” Clarke blew out a breath before shaking her head. “Lexa, I don’t- I don’t- I don’t know. _I don’t know._ ”

 

“Right,” Lexa whispered, shaking her head. “I don’t know either.”

 

“But I like it!” Clarke quickly corrected herself. “Whatever it is we’re doing, I like it.”

 

“How long is this going to last, Clarke?” Lexa asked in a quiet voice. Clarke knitted her eyebrows together before frowning. “You haven’t thought about it, have you?”

 

 _“Lexa,”_ Clarke stressed. “I’m just getting out of an engagement. I’m- I don’t know what’s going to happen or if we’re going to be together. I don’t know.”

 

“And you don’t want kids.” Lexa pointed out. She wanted to laugh because they were standing on opposite sides of the aisle, evaluating their relationship.

 

“Lexa-” Clarke started shaking her head.

 

“It’s okay, Clarke.”

 

“Can we please just carry on shopping?” Clarke asked desperately. Her eyes were begging to drop the conversation and Lexa sighed deeply.

 

“Yes, we can.” Lexa said after a moment.

 

They carried on shopping as if they didn’t just make a few discoveries of their current fling. They both tried with all their might to not make things awkward and enjoy the rest of their night together.

* * *

 

 

It was weird that Anya found herself out and about by herself the next week. Lexa was busy with Gracie and all her other friends had plans tonight. It didn’t stop Anya from grabbing a drink by herself, before catching a cab home.

 

She avoided their local bar with everything in her, instead going to one a half hour away. Anya didn’t mind the drive and when she got there, she settled into the back of the bar.

 

This bar was a little more rundown than their local bar and the owner always managed to hit on the women. Anya still loved the atmosphere and was recognized immediately when she walked in.

 

She had two beers coming her way in no time. She relaxed in her chair before a figure caught her eye. Anya frowned for a second, knowing she didn’t have enough liquid courage to have this conversation, but that didn’t stop her body from moving.

 

“It’s your party and you’ll cry if you want to?” Anya asked, before taking a sit next to the girl. The girl grunted, before downing the rest of her whiskey. Anya admired the way she didn’t even flinch from the burn. The girl just tapped her glass again and the bartender filled it quickly.

 

“Rough day?” Anya asked, keeping her eyes straight forward.

 

“You know, I would be totally creeped out if I didn’t recognize you from that night.” Anya didn’t remember the girl’s name, but she chuckled.

 

“Sorry. I can leave you alone.” Anya made a move to get up and was completely surprised when the Latina stopped her.

 

“Or you could stay.” She murmured around the rim of her drink. Anya gave her an incredulous look before the other girl shrugged. “You could risk the manager coming out and trying to hit on you or you could keep me company. Your choice.”

 

“Is this how you get all the fellas?” Anya dragged out, before sitting down. She saw the other girl flinch and Anya frowned. “Too soon?”

 

“Why are you talking to me, though? I thought you would be planning my death.”

 

“I’m not friends with Clarke.” Anya immediately said, grimacing at the sound of the blonde’s name. “So, I don’t care what you did with her… whatever he is.”

 

Raven let out a long sigh. Anya could tell that the Latina had a tight grip on her glass, by the way her knuckles were turning white. Anya chewed on her bottom lip, throwing some peanuts in her mouth and sipping on her beer.

 

“I’ve tried to keep Lexa away from Clarke, but it’s not working.” Anya said quietly. “I’m starting to give up hope, but I still don’t trust her. Not even for a second.”

 

Raven frowned, wondering why Anya hated Clarke so much.

 

“I’m sure it’s nothing serious. I mean-“ Raven quickly stopped talking, burying her head in her chest.

 

“You mean?” Anya questioned, waiting for Raven to continue talking.

 

“Finn meant absolutely nothing! I mean, sure, a few feelings were involved and once I started, it was hard to stop it. He wasn’t even that good in bed, but I just couldn’t break the habit. Harper won’t talk to me, Clarke won’t even look at me and I’m sitting here in this creepy bar with a girl I barely know, saying things I probably shouldn’t, but I already had four of these, maybe five. I stopped counting and I’m feeling it.” Raven finished her rushed rambling by downing her drink. She gestured for another, but Anya quickly stopped her.

 

“I think that’s enough for her, for now.” Anya quickly said to the bartender, who nodded respectfully and went to go tend to other customers.

 

“I know you kinda already answered this, but why did you do it?”

 

“I never meant to hurt her.” Raven said lamely, making Anya chuckle. Raven shot her a death glare and Anya quickly covered it up with a slight cough. “I don’t know why I did it and that makes this whole situation worse. Like I said, it was hard to stop once we started and I just… I ruined everything!”

 

“I don’t think you ruined everything. Clarke is still messing around with Lexa so she isn’t completely innocent.” Anya grunted.

 

“Wow, you really don’t like her.” Raven pointed out in amusement.

 

“She’s the first one on my hit list if she messes this up, which I know she will.”

 

“Clarke may hate me, but I know her. She wouldn’t intentionally hurt Lexa.”

 

“I’m worried about Lexa, of course, but it’s Gracie I’m more worried about. I’ve never seen her warm up to someone so fast and Clarke doesn’t even like kids.”

 

Raven stayed quiet, knowing that what Anya was saying was true. Through all the countless late nights with each other, Clarke was adamant on never having any kids and now she was sleeping with a girl that had a kid.

 

“Why are you talking to me?” Anya asked quietly after a few moments of silence. Raven’s limbs were loose and her vision was starting to get blurry. She had barely registered Anya’s question.

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“Oh, don’t fool me,” Anya said seriously. “I saw the way you looked at Lexa that night at the bar. Lexa has over 40 tattoos and I have double the amount. I saw the disgusted look.” Anya finished softly.

 

“I didn’t mean anything by it,” Raven quickly said. “I was trying to find anything I could to hate about her and her tattoos were the first culprit. Lexa is absolutely stunning and I was just jealous.”

 

“Okay,” Anya said. “I guess I’ll believe you.”

 

“Please do,” Raven pleaded. “I have nothing against tattoos unlike the rest of this town. I would tell Lexa that, but I have a feeling wherever Lexa is, Clarke is.”

 

“That’s something I’ll agree with you on.” Anya said, finishing her beer and settling back in her seat.

 

“Do you think she’ll ever forgive me?”

 

“I don’t know. I can’t really speak for her. I don’t know much about her, but I know she’s hurt by the situation. It’s a huge mess all around.” Anya gestured vaguely with her hands.

 

“I’ve been giving her space, but there’s so much I want to say to her.” Raven said, relaxing back in her seat. Talking to Anya felt easy, right even.

 

“I don’t think you should force this type of thing. I mean, I don’t really care much for Clarke so I don’t really care if you talk to her or not.”

 

“Noted.” Raven said, pressing her lips in a thin smile.

 

“I’m sorry,” Anya mumbled. “I know you still care about her.”

 

“We’ve been through hell and back, kicking and screaming and we got out of it together,” Raven let out a sad laugh. “She’s my best friend.”

 

“I’m sure it’ll all work out.” Anya placed a hand on Raven’s shoulder, squeezing it. Anya knew she should’ve moved her hand, but a part of her didn’t want to. Raven didn’t make any move to push her off. She just stared at her until Anya cleared her throat.

 

“Sorry.” Anya muttered. Raven was still staring at her before shaking her head.

 

“I should go.” Raven muttered, standing up abruptly and Anya had to rush to steady her.

 

“I’ll call a cab.”

 

“I want to see Clarke.” Raven said stubbornly.

 

“Okay, I’m not saying this because I don’t like her, but that’s not a good idea right now.”

 

“I miss her so much!” Raven cried and Anya quickly called a cab before ushering Raven outside.

 

She didn’t think that helped any. It was hot and humid out and Anya could tell that Raven was getting irritated.

 

“Where is the cab?” Raven shouted. “I want to see Clarke!”

 

“We aren’t going to Clarke. We’re going to your place.”

 

Anya saw the messed up state Raven was in and couldn’t help but feel bad for her. She could tell the girl was hurting and she was currently tripping over her own two feet. Anya knew that Lexa probably would kill her for what she was getting ready to do, but Anya didn’t know if Raven had anyone to look after her.

 

Anya quickly found out that Raven was a stubborn drunk, refusing to get help into the cab when it arrived. Anya had to wait patiently for Raven to try and open the cab door and crawl into the back. The brunette was mumbling incoherent things about Clarke and halfway through the drive she was fast asleep.

 

Anya chewed on her bottom lip, listening to the old country music playing in the cab. She didn’t know if she was making the right decision or not, but she needed to hurry up because that familiar street to get to her house was coming up.

 

Anya took one more look at Raven completely passed out and before the cab driver could turn left, Anya quickly gave him directions to her place instead of Raven’s.


	17. Chapter 17

Anya was startled awake when she heard movement beside her, followed by some mumbling. She didn’t think much of it at first until she realized she lived alone. She quickly popped her head up and groaned at the girl next to her. Raven’s eyes were shut, but her mouth was moving.

 

Raven had kept her up almost the entire night because she kept throwing up. Anya refused to leave the girl’s side as she was afraid she’d miss and throw up on her floors. Raven tried to push her away multiple times, but when she got her own vomit in her hair, she allowed Anya to help her.

 

Anya stayed awake until Raven fell asleep which wasn’t until four in the morning. She was beyond exhausted and was getting ready to get out of bed when an arm flew across her waist. Instead of landing gently, the force in which Raven wrapped her arm around her knocked the breath out of Anya.

 

“Ow!” Anya exclaimed, trying to get out of Raven’s hold.

 

Raven grumbled something incoherent and tightened her hold around Anya.

 

“Raven, get off of me!” Anya grunted out, shoving at the girl’s shoulders. Their position was really intimate for two people who barely knew each other.

 

Raven just snuggled further into her which made Anya blush. The Latina’s head was buried in her chest and her arm was wrapped protectively over her waist. Anya gave in for a few minutes, enjoying the warmth of having someone next to her before pinching the girl on the arm.

 

“Ow!” Raven nearly shouted, making Anya wince. Raven popped her head up and stared at Anya in confusion.

 

Anya couldn’t help the blush. Raven’s face was entirely to close to hers. Anya thought that Raven would back away, but she stayed where she was. Anya had to stop the moan that threatened to escape her mouth when Raven ran her foot along her calf. Raven was oddly affectionate in her hung over state.

 

“Anya?” Raven asked slowly. “What- what-“

 

“You were completely drunk and I would’ve felt like a dick if I just let you try and find your way back home last night. So I called a cab and now we’re here.” Anya explained all in one breath, a part of her praying that Raven would move and the other part (a part she would never admit) wanted Raven to stay exactly where she was.

 

“We’re in your apartment?” Raven asked, slowly looking around at the dark room. The only light coming from the sunlight provided by the cracks in the blinds.

 

“Yes. And you talk in your sleep.” Anya added. Just as she was starting to relax into the warmth radiating from Raven’s body, the Latina peeled herself off of her.

 

“I didn’t say anything out of the ordinary, did I?”

 

“No, you didn’t.” Anya jumped when she felt Raven run her leg along hers.

 

“Thank you,” Raven said as she put some distance between them. “I hardly remember last night.”

 

“You’re very stubborn.” Anya said absentmindedly, thinking about how she wanted Raven’s body on top of hers again, before she stopped and cleared her throat.

 

“So, I’ve been told.” Came Raven’s delayed response. “You have anything for breakfast?”

 

“Yeah, I can find my way around a kitchen.” Anya said confidently. She’d been living alone for years and knew she couldn’t live off takeout for the rest of her life. So, she quickly enrolled in cooking classes and wished Lexa would’ve joined, as Lexa couldn’t cook to save her life. She prayed for Gracie each night, hoping Lexa could make something decent for the girl.

 

“Do you think I can shower before hand?” Raven asked. “I feel disgusting.”

 

“Sure, be my guest.”

 

Anya knew that she should’ve gotten out of bed after she said that, but her body had other plans. She stayed in bed, staring at Raven until the Latina looked away.

 

“Can I borrow some clothes?” Raven whispered. She didn’t want to break the silence around them.

 

“Yes!” Anya said all too quickly. She cleared her throat before finally hopping out of bed. “Are sweats okay?”

 

“Perfect.” Raven said as she got out of bed too.

 

Anya got out a pair of loose sweats and a shirt for Raven.

 

“Here you go.” Anya handed over the clothes and showed Raven how to work her shower. It was one of those fancy ones that had five different knobs just to start it.

 

“This is like a time machine,” Raven said looking around at the built-in shower. “There’s no reason it needs five different knobs. I only have one and you twist it up for hot and down for cold.”

 

“I had a little extra money and I treated myself.” Anya shrugged with a smirk. Raven offered her a small smile before facing her.

 

Anya was taking the time to admire how great Raven looked even though she was hung over. Anya was realizing how _gorgeous_ she was and it almost made her blush again.

 

“So..” Raven hummed out, a teasing smile on her face that Anya didn’t catch.

 

“So..” Anya copied her, folding her hands behind her back.

 

“Are you going to give me some privacy?” Raven asked with a quiet chuckle. Anya’s eyes widened when she realized that she was just standing here, awkwardly staring at the girl.

 

“Yes!” Anya said loudly, before regaining her composure. “Yes, I’ll just- I’ll just… be in the kitchen.” She finished lamely, missing the teasing smile Raven had on her face.

 

“Thanks.”

 

Anya offered her a firm nod before leaving the bathroom. She walked into her kitchen and started on breakfast. She could hear the water running and wanted to slap herself for how awkward she was being around Raven.

 

Anya whipped up two stacks of pancakes and was getting ready to start on the bacon when she heard a knock on her door.

 

The water had stopped running and she knew Raven was done with her shower. Anya had no idea who was at her door, and prayed that it wasn’t Lexa. Anya looked back at her bedroom, before going to answer the door.

 

Anya’s focus was still on her bedroom when she ripped the door open. She hoped whoever it was, would go away quickly.

 

Anya turned around and was met with the one person she feared it would be.

 

“Lexa,” Anya breathed out in shock. “What are you doing here?”

 

“I thought I’d grab breakfast with my best friend.” Lexa said with a bright smile on her face. Anya hated that she was going to ruin her mood.

 

“I thought Gracie was your best friend?” Anya asked with an awkward chuckle.

 

“She is,” Lexa frowned. “But, so are you.”

 

Anya stayed quiet, hoping that Lexa would get the hint that right now wasn’t a good time.

 

“Are you okay?” Lexa asked slowly, looking around as if that would give her the answer to her friend’s strange behavior.

 

“I’m just really hungover and now isn’t the best time.”

 

Lexa took a minute to look Anya over. Her hair was perfectly tossed for it to be the morning. Sure, there were bags under her eyes, but Lexa knew hung over Anya and this wasn’t it.

 

“Hungover Anya wouldn’t even be talking right now. She would just let me in.”

 

“Dammit, Lexa!” Anya huffed out, but Lexa knew she was joking.

 

They were both interrupted by a door opening and closing, making Lexa smirk.

 

“Is there someone else in there?” Lexa asked with a giddy smile. “Did you finally get laid?” Lexa asked with a gasp that made Anya glare at her.

 

“Your sex life was non existent until Clarke came into the picture, so I don’t want to hear it.”

 

At the jab, Lexa held her hands up in surrender, but couldn’t stop the smirk on her face.

 

“Was it serious? Was it a one time thing?” Lexa whispered so the girl wouldn’t hear her. “Can I meet her?”

 

Anya’s eyes widened at that. She was getting ready to tell Lexa to go away, when a voice sounded behind her.

 

“Anya, the stove is still on! Are you trying to kill me?” Anya rolled her eyes at Raven. Not only was the girl stubborn, but she was dramatic as well.

 

Anya sighed because there was no hiding it. She knew by the way Lexa was mouthing the words Raven had just said, she was piecing together what was happening.

 

Lexa’s giddy behavior, quickly turned cold.

 

“You slept with Raven? What the hell is wrong with you?” Lexa all but shouted at Anya.

 

“It’s ten in the morning and I have neighbors!” Anya screeched, yanking Lexa in by her shirt.

 

Raven stood in the kitchen when Lexa walked in, mouth agape and hands wringing in front of her.

 

“I can’t believe you slept with the enemy!” Lexa hissed, staring Raven down.

 

“We didn’t sleep together!” Anya quickly defended herself.

 

“Oh, really?” Lexa cocked her head to the side. “Then explain to me why you guys both look like you didn’t sleep and why she’s wearing your clothes and why she’s in your apartment this morning. As far as I’m concerned, you two don’t hang out!”

 

“Okay, Okay,” Anya winced. “I can see how you think we slept together, but we didn’t. That would be gross!”

 

“Hey, pardon me, but I’m great in bed.”

 

“I’m sure Finn can vouch for you.” Lexa sneered. Raven sighed loudly and Anya glared at her best friend.

 

“Chill, Lexa.”

 

“Oh, now you’re taking her side,” Lexa exclaimed. “Of course you are. You aren’t making things better for yourself.”

 

“She was drunk and alone. I wasn’t going to just leave her. What if something happened? I wouldn’t be able to live with myself,” Anya said, before softly adding. “I thought you of all people would know that.”

 

“Don’t play that card with me!” Lexa grumbled angrily. “Don’t try to use my wife’s death against me!”

 

Raven stood in the middle of the kitchen listening to the argument break out between the two friends. She shook her head before jumping in.

 

“Stop it!” Raven yelled over them. “This is all my fault. I shouldn’t have gotten wasted last night. I’ll leave.”

 

“Raven, you don’t have to leave.” Anya said quickly making Lexa scoff.

 

“I should go. It’s clear that I’m not welcomed.”

 

Anya glared Lexa down until the brunette sighed. Lexa’s lip was curled in disgust and she was only saying these words because of Anya.

 

“You don’t have to leave.”

 

Raven stopped midway out the door. She kept her hand on the doorknob, just in case Lexa changed her mind.

 

“You can stay.” Lexa reassured her. Raven looked at Anya, who nodded encouragingly.

 

“I’m sorry about that night and I didn’t mean anything by the looks,” Raven stumbled upon her apology and then frowned. “I just want my Clarkey bear back.”

 

Anya tried to hold in her laughter while Lexa’s eyebrows went up.

 

“Clarkey bear?” Lexa asked slowly.

 

“I know you two are close and that’s my nickname for her.” Raven explained defensively, looking at Anya. “Stop trying to laugh!”

 

Raven swatted pathetically in Anya’s direction and the taller girl got it together.

 

“I can’t be apart of this!” Lexa said, looking between the two girls. “Clarke would kill me if she knew I was conversing with the enemy.”

 

“The enemy? Really?” Raven squinted her eyes at Lexa. Lexa raised her eyebrows at Raven and they both stared each other down for a couple seconds.

 

“I’m just going to go back to making breakfast so please try not to kill each other.” Anya quickly excused herself to get back to making the bacon that was hissing angrily in the pan.

 

“Have you talk to Clarke recently?” Raven asked quietly behind her. Lexa wished she could answer differently, but sadly she couldn’t.

 

“No, I haven’t.” Lexa answered vaguely. She refused to talk about her problems with Clarke to her former best friend, so she kept her mouth shut. Raven was giving her a questioning gaze, but when it was clear that Lexa wasn’t going to elaborate, the girl huffed and walked off to Anya’s bedroom.

 

“I’m glad to see she’s making herself at home.” Lexa rolled her eyes and made her way to the kitchen. She sat down at one of the bar stools.

 

“I haven’t seen you this feisty since that one guy who was hitting on Costia at the bar.” Anya recalled with a slight chuckle.

 

Lexa’s heart ached at the mention of her wife, but she smiled nevertheless.

 

“That guy had it coming. He kept looking at her ass and I wanted to break his face.”

 

“If I hadn’t gotten you guys out in time, I’m sure you would’ve.” Anya fully laughed at the memory of her best friend giving the middle-aged guy the death stare the entire night.

 

“And Costia hadn’t been out in so long, she was so oblivious that he was trying to hit on her.”

 

“She was always so kind.” Anya smiled sadly, thinking about her friend. “I miss her so much.”

 

Lexa sighed deeply, memories of Costia’s funeral flashing through her mind. Gracie was just a baby when it happened, she knew her daughter had no idea what was going on. Lexa was a mess the entire day. She cried more that day than she had her entire life. She hated that Gracie was growing up without her birth mother. She _hated_ that Costia wasn’t here.

 

“That makes two of us.” Lexa mumbled.

 

“She’s not bad.” Anya gestured towards Raven’s direction.

 

“But you still can’t stand Clarke?”

 

“Oh, you mean the woman who has the potential to break you and Gracie? The woman who engaged in sexual relations with you while she was engaged?” Anya asked rhetorically. “Of course I do.”

 

“Well, lucky for you, we aren’t talking.”

 

Anya immediately threw down her spatula and turned around to face Lexa.

 

“What did she do?” Anya spat angrily.

 

“It was more of the both of us,” Lexa sighed. “It’s been a week today since we’ve spoken. We decided to evaluate our relationship in the middle of the supermarket.”

 

“Wow.” Anya huffed out a laugh.

 

Tears immediately started to prickle Lexa’s eyes. Anya quickly turned the stove off and rushed over to her.

 

“I-I’m afraid.. she’ll never want kids. She’ll never accept Gracie. That’s not something you’re just suddenly okay with.”

 

“I swear to god,” Anya spoke lowly. “She makes one mistake and I’m going to-"

 

“Anya, please,” Lexa cut her off. “Just hold me.”

 

Anya wrapped her arms tighter around Lexa, placing a soft kiss to her forehead.

 

“Always.”

 

“Oh, is this a bad time?” Lexa almost groaned at the voice behind them. Lexa quickly broke away from Anya and wiped her tears.

 

“You really know how to make appearances.” Lexa said, not looking either of them in the eye. “I should go.”

 

“Lexa, don’t go. I just finished making breakfast.” Anya pleaded, trying to grab a hold of her.

 

“It’s Saturday and Gracie is spending the day with Charlotte,” Lexa backed away from Anya, refusing to make eye contact with Raven. “There’s something I need to do.”

 

Lexa didn’t elaborate or give the two time to respond. She quickly gathered her stuff and walked out of the apartment and didn’t look back.

 

She had no idea why there was a growing knot just brewing in the pit of her stomach.

* * *

 

Clarke surprisingly agreed to meet her for lunch. Lexa had no idea how they were going to move forward from this, and wasn’t sure if they were even going to be able to, but she at least wanted to try.

 

They barely made eye contact when Clarke showed up a few minutes after Lexa tried to straighten up the best she could. It was nearly impossible because Gracie’s toys were everywhere.

 

“I’m glad you came.” Lexa spoke softly, moving aside to let Clarke in. This was the first time they’d seen each other since their argument and Lexa was eyeing her down.

 

“I almost didn’t,” Clarke spoke in an irritated voice. She threw her purse down on the dinner table and faced Lexa. “Until I realized that half of this tension is because of me. I should’ve just kept my mouth shut.”

 

They went into the kitchen without a word as Lexa dished out the burgers and fries that Clarke got them for lunch.

 

“I’m not exactly innocent either,” Lexa shrugged sheepishly. “I had a really big realization that I shouldn’t have had in the middle of a store.”

 

“Can we eat first and then talk?” Clarke asked nervously. Lexa knew she just wanted a few minutes in her company without them arguing and Lexa quickly agreed.

 

As soon as they finished eating, they cleaned up and walked into the family room.

 

“I think this conversation is long overdue.” Lexa sighed as they both walked to the couch. Lexa cleared off all of Gracie’s toys littering the couch before they sat down.

 

There was a huge distance between them and Lexa hated it, but made no move to close it. They stayed silent for a few minutes, neither knowing how to approach the topic.

 

“I’m used to not having any responsibilities,” Clarke broke the silence. “Yes, I’m CEO and I have my own house, but that pales in comparison to actually having another human being that depends on you for _everything_.”

 

Lexa knew the minute Clarke started talking, that she didn’t want to have this conversation. She didn’t want to open herself up to this vulnerable subject, but they were never going to move forward if they couldn’t express how they really feel.

 

“I have a job people my age _dream_ of having,” Clarke breathed, trying to piece together her thoughts. “I have a house. I know my parents bought it for me, but I am able to take care of it the way I want to. I could choose to walk around naked if I wanted to. The whole day. The whole damn day, because I _can_.”

 

“What are you trying to get at, Clarke?” Lexa asked annoyed. “That your life is better than mine?”

 

“That is _not_ what I’m trying to say.” Clarke shook her head. “I know we’re living two different lifestyles, but that doesn’t mean that this was just some fling.”

 

“Then what is it, Clarke? What are we?” Lexa asked desperately. “Because I have no idea where we stand.”

 

“You can’t just make someone love kids.” Clarke muttered out sadly. “Either you love them or you don’t.”

 

“I’m not trying to make you do anything. I’m just trying to understand what you want.”

 

“I want you.” Clarke’s voice cracked as she spoke. “I want _you_.”

 

“I have a kid that comes with that. We’re a package deal, Clarke. That will never change, so you need to figure out exactly what you want.”

 

Clarke stayed silent, staring down at her lap. She had no idea what she was doing with Lexa, but she didn’t want it to stop.

 

She knew when she walked into this that Lexa had a kid. She couldn’t stop her attraction and couldn’t stop herself from acting on her attraction. She would never regret anything that she did with Lexa.

 

“I’ll never be good enough for you two.” Clarke voiced her concerns she had since she met Lexa. She knew this conversation wasn’t going to be easy. She knew it was going to be raw and a lot of emotions were going to be poured into it because they both cared about each other.

 

“Shouldn’t that be something I decide?” Lexa asked softly.

 

“You’ll realize it sooner or later,” Clarke sucked in a breath, trying to keep her tears at bay. “I’m not easy to love, Lexa. I’m just not.”

 

Lexa finally broke and scooted closer to Clarke. She wiped the tears that fell out the corner of Clarke’s eyes.

 

“But, I want to try to be, for you.. and for Gracie,” Clarke sighed. “I don’t know what I’m doing. I’ll admit that, but I don’t want to stop this.”

 

Lexa felt a little at ease knowing that Clarke didn’t want to end things, but that didn’t make up for the other issues that they had with each other.

 

“I have a lot of fears and doubts too. Especially when it comes to Gracie.”

 

“Well, that’s understandable, Lexa. She’s your daughter. I’m just being pathetic.”

 

“No, you’re not,” Lexa murmured. “You’re a woman who’s going through a lot and-“

 

“And I’m involved with another woman who has a kid right after ending my engagement.”

 

“Yes. That’s pretty accurate.” Lexa nodded along with Clarke.

 

“We don’t have to have all the answers right now, Clarke, but I just want some reassurance that you’ll be around.”

 

“You will,” Clarke reassured her. “I want you to be able to rely on me.”

 

Lexa took a moment to sort out her thoughts. She felt extremely vulnerable right now, but knew this was a moment where she could say whatever she wanted and not be judged for it.

 

“No matter how long it’s been, nothing can replace the _ache_ I have in my chest every time I look at my daughter, knowing that she won’t be growing up with two loving parents.”  

 

“Lexa-“

 

Lexa didn't listen to Clarke’s pleads. She got off the couch and start pacing back and forth. Years of built up tension just flooding out of her.

 

“Maybe if I’d told her, she would’ve stayed here,” Lexa muttered to herself. “Because she offered, Clarke. She offered to stay here and help me with Gracie because she was just a baby then. Maybe if I told her that I needed her to stay, because I did. I needed her to stay, Clarke. I needed her to be here with me because I had no idea what I was doing with Gracie, but this was big. She wanted to go to this conference for months and I knew I couldn’t let her miss it.”

 

Clarke knew there was no stopping Lexa now. Her heart broke at the devastating look on Lexa’s face as she spoke. She couldn’t imagine losing a loved one the way Lexa did. Her heart hurt for her.

 

“Maybe if she would’ve never gotten on that plane. Maybe if her plane was delayed for _just_ an hour. Maybe… maybe she would still be here.” Lexa’s last words were barely audible, but Clarke still heard them.

 

Clarke smoothed down her dress and got up. She rushed over to Lexa and put a hand on her shoulder. Lexa didn’t turn around, she just let her shoulders sag and gave in to Clarke’s comfort.

 

“And if she was still here, you and I probably would’ve never met.” Clarke spoke lowly. The second she said those words, she removed her hand from Lexa’s shoulder. Lexa finally turned around and wiped at the tears that she couldn’t hold back anymore.

 

They didn’t say anything as they stared at each other. They had no idea what to say. Lexa supposed Clarke was right. If Costia was still here, she didn’t think she would’ve ever had the chance to meet Clarke. Lexa knew things would be completely different if Costia was still here, but she couldn’t keep thinking like that. It was so hard not to, with Gracie around.

 

Gracie deserved so much. She deserved a lot of things Lexa couldn’t give her. She deserved her mother.

 

“I think I should go.” The words fell out of Clarke’s mouth easily, but they pierced at Lexa’s heart. She didn’t want Clarke to go, not like this.

 

Clarke was already gathering her things when Lexa failed to respond to her. There were so many things running through her mind and she wanted them to stop. She wanted to forget about it for a few minutes, so just as Clarke reached for the door handle, Lexa quickly stopped her.

 

She placed a hand on her wrist and turned her around.

 

“Or you could stay.”

 

Those were the only words Clarke needed to hear, before her lips were on Lexa’s. Fast, hot and desperate. Clarke couldn’t stopped the way she captured Lexa’s lips as if she was never going to let them go.

 

Lexa wrapped her hands around Clarke’s waist and pulled her flush against her. Her hands wandered up Clarke’s sides until they reached around her back for the zipper.

 

“Let’s go upstairs.” Clarke whispered in between frantic kisses. Lexa didn’t respond, she yanked on Clarke’s wrist until they were in her bedroom.

 

Lexa pushed Clarke against her door and began her assault on her neck. Clarke had one hand on the door knob and Lexa was wondering what she was doing until she heard something click.

 

“I don’t want anyone interrupting this.” Clarke said as an explanation, grinding her center against Lexa’s clothed thigh.

 

Lexa continued to nibble on her neck, searching for that one spot. She knew she found it moments later when Clarke let out a deep groan and threw her head further back.

 

Lexa groaned back at the heat that was radiating off Clarke. She quickly unbuttoned her shirt before she threw it off. Clarke quickly reached around and played with Lexa’s bra strap until she got it unhooked.

 

Lexa took a moment to get Clarke out of her dress before pulling her in for another kiss. The blonde reached down and unbuckled Lexa’s jeans before she kicked them off. Lexa had her entire body pinned against Clarke’s and her stomach was swirling in excitement.

 

Lexa reached around, wrapping her hands under Clarke’s thighs until she lifted her up. Clarke let out a surprised gasp, biting down on Lexa’s lip. Lexa let out a hiss that turned into a moan when Clarke smoothed her tongue over her lip.

 

“Your underwear is in the way.” Lexa breathed in her ear. Lexa allowed some space between them and as Clarke was getting rid of her underwear, she pushed her boxers down.

 

Lexa spit into her hand and stroke herself a few times before holding Clarke up again. Clarke wrapped her arms around Lexa’s shoulders, kissing down her neck and preparing herself. No matter how many times they had sex, Clarke was sure she would never get used to how big Lexa was (not that she wasn’t complaining).

 

No, Clarke wasn’t complaining at all. She held her breath as Lexa slowly pushed inside her. She let out a long, breathy sigh when Lexa was completely buried inside her. Clarke couldn’t help the groans and moans that escaped her mouth the entire time Lexa was inside her.

 

Lexa’s legs were spread wide apart and her grip tightened around Clarke as she pushed into her. Their lips met somewhere in the middle of their desperate thrusting. Clarke knew they had a lot of things to figure out, but that could wait, especially with her orgasm looming around the corner.

 

Lexa hadn’t even been inside her for five minutes and Clarke could already feel it happening. It only got worse when Lexa reached down and started playing with her clit. Clarke let out a raspy moan before her grip tightened around Lexa. Clarke would never get over how quickly Lexa could make her cum. With the way Lexa was roughly thrusting into her, Clarke knew she was close too.

 

Clarke let out a surprised moan when her walls coming crashing down around Lexa. The brunette held her up the best she could as she rode out her orgasm, but Clarke couldn’t control her body movement. She had a death grip on Lexa as her walls stuttered around her.

 

“Jesus, Clarke,” Lexa groaned. “You’re so tight.”

 

Clarke responded with a long moan, sounding a lot like her name. Lexa smirked, but it was wiped away when her dick twitched heavily inside Clarke.

 

“Pull out, Lexa.” Clarke warned. Lexa only gave her a single nod before she ripped herself away from Clarke. The blonde quickly dropped to her knees, just in time for Lexa to erupt all over her face.

 

Lexa’s face was scrunched up as she pumped her dick and emptied herself onto Clarke’s face. The blonde had her eyes close and mouth open, which made another spurt of cum come rushing out of Lexa.

 

When she was done, she let go of herself and helped Clarke back up to her feet. Instead of using tissues, Clarke used her hand to wipe away Lexa’s cum, licking it off her hands. Lexa just stood in front of her, mouth agape and her dick hardening.

 

Lexa didn’t say anything as she dragged Clarke to her bed and they got under the sheets. Lexa’s mouth was on every inch of skin she could get her hands on. She softly took Clarke’s nipple in her mouth before climbing on top of her. Clarke wrapped her hands in Lexa’s hair, encouraging her.

 

Lexa’s hands trailed down Clarke’s body, stopping just short of her center. Clarke jerked her hips up, trying to find her hand and Lexa smirked against her.

 

“I know this is probably the worse time to do this,” Clarke moaned out, but Lexa was only half-listening. “But, I need to tell you something.”

 

When Clarke got no response, she softly yanked on Lexa’s hair.

 

“Lexa.” Clarke whispered, trying to get her attention, but the brunette’s attention was solely on her breasts.

 

 _“Lexa!”_ Clarke raised her voice until Lexa finally popped her head up. Clarke almost laughed at the shocked expression on her face, her lips were slightly bruised from when she bit down on her lip and her hair was all over the place.

 

“Yes?” Lexa asked slowly.

 

“I need to talk to you.” Clarke said with a blush. She felt extremely exposed with her chest on display and Lexa in between her legs.

 

“Okay, what is it?” Lexa questioned as she settled off to the side of Clarke, her arm wrapped around her waist. “And it better be good for you to interrupt sex.”

 

Clarke sighed loudly before facing Lexa.

 

“I know my timing is terrible, but if we’re about to have sex again, then I need to tell you this.” Clarke explained, looking down at Lexa. She didn’t say anything and Clarke let out another sigh.

 

“My mother is a control freak-“ Clarke started, but Lexa quickly stopped her.

 

“You interrupted me about to put my dick inside of you to talk about your mother?” Lexa asked in disbelief.

 

“Well, when you put it so bluntly, it doesn’t sound all that urgent.” Clarke playfully shoved at Lexa’s shoulders. “And not nearly as nice.”

 

“So, let’s not talk about her and let me-“

 

“I think you’re gonna wanna hear this.” Clarke softly spoke over Lexa.

 

“Okay, please just tell me! The suspense is killing me.”

 

“Like I said, my mom is a control freak and things have to go her way,” Clarke explained. “She wants to have dinner with us, Lexa.”

 

Clarke cringed as Lexa’s mouth dropped open.

 

“Yeah, you’re right. This isn’t nearly as nice as us fucking.” Lexa rolled her eyes. “Why?”

 

“I don’t know!” Clarke said. “My dad said she just wants to talk and he wants to get to know the girl I’m leaving Finn for.”

 

“But you aren’t just leaving Finn for me, are you?” Lexa asked with a frown.

 

“No,” Clarke answered softly. “But you have two options.”

 

Clarke paused for a moment, to make sure that Lexa was paying attention. Clarke knew she was for the most part, but her gaze kept slipping down to her chest.

 

“Either we go to this dinner and see what they want or my mom shows up at your work and interrogates the crap out of you.”

 

“Is there a third option?” Lexa asked with a cheeky smile. Clarke smiled at Lexa’s effort to clear the tension.

 

“It can’t be that bad, can it?”

 

“Yes, Lexa!” Clarke exclaimed. “You are walking into your own death trap.”

 

“I handled my wife’s death and what is  Gracie’s terrible twos, I think I can survive your mother,” Lexa said, but paused for a moment. “If she says anything about my daughter, cutlery will go flying. She can say whatever she wants about me, but she won’t drag my innocent daughter into this. I’ll kill her.”

 

“I like this fire. It’s totally hot.” Clarke said with a smirk.

 

“Why don’t we talk about this after our, let’s say, fourth, maybe fifth round.” Lexa suggested, already crawling back over to Clarke and tugging the sheets down. “Convince me to go to this dinner, baby.”

 

Clarke just about swooned the second Lexa called her baby. She quickly pulled her in for a kiss before flipping them over.

 

“I think I can do that.” Clarke said lowly, crawling up Lexa’s body.

* * *

 

As the next week rolled around, Clarke made little progress on talking Lexa out of the dinner. She didn’t say anything to her mother about it because she wanted to be one-hundred percent sure that Lexa really wanted to do this.

 

Abby had been calling her non-stop asking if Lexa was going. They didn’t talk about the ulterior motive behind this dinner, Abby would hang up just in time for Clarke to mention it.

 

Clarke had been drowning in work the entire week and barely had time to see Lexa when she wasn’t busy with Gracie. The dinner was scheduled for Sunday and it was currently Thursday. Lexa kept saying she could handle her mother, but Clarke didn’t want to set Lexa up like that. She knew exactly how her mother was and there was no way they were leaving that dinner happy.

 

They weren’t even together and made zero progress in that department and now they were invited to a dinner, from her own parents, who knew they weren’t together.

 

Clarke had no idea what to do and was completely stressing out about it. She had her assistant, Murphy, fetch her far too many vanilla milkshakes and fries. It was her comfort food and made her feel fine for a few minutes.

 

She was currently going over some paperwork when there was a soft knock on the door.

 

“Come in.” She called, but knew it was her assistant. He was the only one that had the privilege to knock on her door. Everyone else had to go through him before they could be let in.

 

“Ms. Griffin,” Murphy spoke up. “You have a visitor.”

 

“A visitor?” Clarke questioned, signing away on her paperwork. “Who could possibly-“

 

“Hello, Clarke.” Clarke immediately dropped her pen at the sound of her voice. Her ears perked up and she had to hide the smile that threatened to take over her face.

 

“Lexa?” Clarke asked as she stood up. “Thank you, Murphy. I can take it from here. Please, don’t interrupt us unless the world is literally ending.”

 

“Got it, boss.” Murphy said with a smirk as he closed the door.

 

“Lexa, hi!” Clarke greeted, completely taken back by her visit. Lexa had never been to her work before.

 

“Hey, Clarke,” Lexa rushed out. “I'm sorry to just show up here, but I _really_ need to talk to you.”

 

Clarke took a moment to look over Lexa’s flustered state and almost purred. The brunette was wearing a white muscle t-shirt and tight jeans, Clarke swore Lexa was trying to give her a heart attack.

 

“Okay, let’s talk.” Clarke said lowly.

 

The second Lexa was within reach, Clarke took her hair out of her ponytail and started unbuttoning her blouse.

 

“Whoa, Clarke!” Lexa’s eyes went wide and immediately stopped her. “What are you doing?”

 

“I thought this was code for sex.” Clarke said dumbly, her hands fell limply at her sides.

 

“It’s not that I don’t want to, but I have something I really need to discuss with you that I didn’t want to on the phone,” Lexa said, looking around her office. “This is a really nice office.”

 

“It took a lot of work and money,” Clarke said, hurriedly buttoning her blouse up. “Well, what do you need to talk about that can’t wait over the phone?”

 

Lexa took a moment, admiring the expensive interior of Clarke’s office before facing her. She didn’t even want to sit on the big, white couch in the corner, fearing that she would mess it up somehow. Lexa sighed, hoping this conversation would go well.

 

“I’m completely booked this Saturday. Like, I don’t have a free moment at all. I don’t want to cancel on any of my clients because they are currently paying my bills right now.” Lexa explained. Clarke feared Lexa was going to put a dent in her floor with the way she started walking back and forth.

 

“Charlotte and David are going to a conference this weekend they can’t miss. All my friends are working this weekend, including Monty and Jasper. A babysitter isn’t really the best option since it will be all day and I’m already paying full price for Gracie’s daycare right now and even though it’s part time, it’s costing me an arm and a leg. Actually, my whole entire body.”

 

Lexa stopped to let out a small chuckle before finally stopping in front of Clarke. Clarke frowned because she was listening to every word Lexa was saying, but had no idea where she was going with this.

 

“Could you by chance watch Gracie this Saturday?” Lexa asked nervously making Clarke’s eyes go wide. The blonde gaped at her and she tried her best to fix her face, but she couldn’t.

 

“This Saturday? Like the day before the big dinner with my parents?” Clarke asked in disbelief. “And for the whole day?”

 

“Yes.” Lexa sighed. “I can pay you for it, if that’s what you want. I just don’t have anyone else that can do it.”

 

Clarke tried to rack her brain for an appropriate response. She told her current thoughts to shut up because they were a constant mantra of: _no, no, no, no._

 

“Lexa, I just don’t think that-“ Clarke immediately stopped talking, the second she saw Lexa’s face drop. Clarke knew Lexa had absolutely no one who was free, if she was asking her to do it.

 

“I just don’t think that’s a good idea. I barely know how to change a diaper.” Clarke chuckled out, but stopped when Lexa didn’t find it amusing.

 

Clarke let out a heavy sigh, suddenly needing to sit down.

 

“You really trust me with her?” Clarke frowned.

 

“She likes you. I’m sure she would be thrilled to spend the day with you,” Lexa shrugged. “I wish I could tell you that you could call me if there’s any problems, but I’m going to be tattooing _all day_.”

 

“Lexa, I’ve never watched a kid by myself let alone for an entire day. You and Gracie can trust me all you want, but I don’t trust myself with her. Lexa, I-“

 

“Then just say no Clarke.” Clarke hated how small Lexa looked and sounded right now. She wanted to get up and give her a hug, but knew Lexa wouldn’t take that well.

 

“What do you want me to say?” Clarke asked in exasperation. “You know my phobia of kids.”

 

“I thought Gracie was different. I thought I could rely on you.” Lexa reminded her with her hands on her hips. Clarke hated that they were in the middle of arguing because the way Lexa’s shirt was clinging to her muscles right now, was making heat pool between her legs

 

“You can! She is!” Clarke defended herself. “But not enough for me to watch her.”

 

“Okay, then let’s just forget I ever asked and remind me to never ask you in the future!” Lexa spat angrily. “Let me take the _whole_ day off work because no one can watch my daughter and that’s another paycheck I’m down. A paycheck that I _need in order_ to take care of Gracie. God forbid you actually step up to the plate and do something for someone else once in your life. You can be in charge of a whole damn company, but you can’t take care of a kid for a day.”

 

“Those are two completely different things!” Clarke reasoned. “You can’t compare a company to a kid.”

 

“I sure as hell can!” Lexa clenched her jaw, walking closer to the door.

 

“Lexa, wait. Please!” Clarke begged, rushing over to Lexa. “Just give me a minute to process this.”

 

Clarke stared into Lexa's angry green eyes.

 

“This isn’t even about you not being able to watch her,” Lexa whispered. “This is about the fact that you never want to watch her.”

 

“I never said that, Lexa!”

 

“You’re involved with someone who has a kid!” Lexa yelled at her, trying to make her way to the door, but Clarke was blocking her.

 

“I know that.” Clarke said defensively.

 

“Then act like it!” Lexa sneered. The words made Clarke falter and Lexa finally made her way out the door and down the stairs.

 

She regretted it the minute she realized that Clarke’s office was on the top floor, but walking down the stairs gave her some time to clear her head. Lexa knew she should probably apologize for the way she completely bombarded Clarke, but another part of her knew she was right. Lexa was afraid Clarke was never going to come around to the idea of kids.

 

Lexa’s shoulders sagged when she saw that it was pouring down rain. She could’ve sworn it was nice and sunny when she walked into the building. Lexa quickly unlocked her Mustang and was getting ready to scurry in, when a hand stopped her.

 

Lexa spun around and was face to face with Clarke. The blonde was getting drenched by the second and her bright blue eyes stood out against the now grey sky.

 

“C-Clarke-“ Lexa’s visions was starting to blur and she didn’t know if it was because of her tears or the rain.

 

“I’m sorry!” Clarke called over the rain.

 

“You’re going to get sick!” Lexa pointed out. She was only in a short, black dress.

 

“I don’t care if I get pneumonia,” Clarke shook her head. “We need to talk.”

 

“Okay, let’s at least get in my car.” Lexa suggested, rounding around the car and opening the door for Clarke. They both slid in the car and Lexa turned her car on and got the heat going.

 

“I’m sorry,” Clarke whispered. Lexa was grateful she always kept a clean towel in her car because Gracie was a messy little human being. “You completely blindsided me and I panicked.”

 

Lexa reached in the back and handed Clarke the towel. The blonde took it appreciatively, dabbing at her clothes.

 

“No, I’m sorry,” Lexa sighed. “I shouldn’t have blindsided you. I shouldn't have yelled.”

 

“You weren’t wrong.” Clarke said as she tried to dry her hair.

 

“You chased me down in the rain.” Lexa said with some wonder in her voice.

 

“I couldn’t let you leave like that,” Clarke took a deep breath before facing Lexa. “I’ll do it.”

 

“Clarke, no,” Lexa immediately said. “Don’t do this because of the things I said. I was completely out of line-“

 

“No, you weren’t,” Clarke said. “You were completely right. I’m with someone who has a kid and I need to start acting like it. Gracie isn’t terrible. I don’t know how Saturday is going to go, but we’ll see.”

 

“If you’re being serious, I can give you Charlotte's number. She wouldn’t mind hearing from you if it has to do with Gracie.”

 

“Okay.” Clarke rapidly nodded her head. “That would be lovely.”

 

“I’m sorry.” Lexa whispered again and Clarke placed a hand on her thigh.

 

“I could’ve been a little more open to it.”

 

“And I shouldn’t have dropped a bomb on you like that.”

 

“I want to do this,” Clarke nodded her head. “I want to be someone you can lean on.”

 

Clarke reached out, tucking a strand of hair behind Lexa’s ear.

 

“I don’t want to force you into this. I didn’t know how you were going to react honestly, but I didn’t think it was going to turn into that.”

 

“This weekend is going to be very eventful.” Clarke blew out a breath.

 

“Should I bring something? We’re still going right?” Lexa asked to double check.

 

“Yes, if you’re absolutely sure.”

 

“Only if you’re absolutely sure that you’ll watch Gracie.”

 

“I’ll watch Gracie.” Clarke said with a brave smile, leaning in to peck Lexa on the lips.

 

“Bring some wine. Moscato, if you can, but anything you want. My mom drinks just about any brand of wine.”

 

“That’s good to know.” Lexa nodded to herself.

 

“I need to get back to work.” Clarke said after a moment, listening to the rain beat down on the car.

 

“Will you be okay in those damp clothes?” Lexa asked warily, making Clarke smirk.

 

“I always keep an extra pair of clothes around, just in case,” Clarke shrugged. “You can help me change if you want.”

 

Clarke slid her hand extremely high up Lexa’s legs, squeezing softly.

 

“As tempting as that sounds,” Lexa leaned in, placing a soft kiss to Clarke’s forehead. “I need to go pick Gracie up.”

 

“Oh, okay,” Clarke nodded, letting her hand linger for a second before pulling away. “I really do need to get back in there.”

 

“I’ll see you Saturday?” Lexa asked, looking into Clarke’s eyes, checking for any signs that she didn’t want to do this, but there wasn’t any.

 

“Of course,” Clarke smiled. “And then dinner's at six on the dot on Sunday.”

 

“I’ll be there.” Lexa brought Clarke in for one last, parting kiss. Clarke almost sighed into it, knowing there was no talking Lexa out of this. It was almost as if Lexa _wanted_ to come face to face with her mother, and Clarke couldn’t think of anything worse.

 

Clarke knew the two women she cared for were getting ready to go head to head with each other. Clarke wasn’t naive enough to think anything different.

 

Clarke just hoped Lexa’s armor was stronger and tougher than her mother’s because Lexa was going to need all the ammo she could find.

 

Clarke knew Lexa had no idea the war she was about to enter and only hoped she was ready.


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you guys for all the support on my stories. I can't thank you enough. I really don't consider myself a writer or good at writing. That's been part of the reason I've stopped uploading as much. I'm not even going to school for writing, I purely just do this in my meantime and it got hard for a while because I really didn't think I was good enough. I still don't, but I'm ready to start uploading more. So, thank you all for still sticking by my side!
> 
> I hope you all enjoy!

* * *

 

Clarke stared at the simple brown, wooden door, wondering why she hadn’t knocked yet. She opted for some regular clothes today because she figured she would be on the move constantly.

 

Clarke had her purse clutched to her chest, gripping it a little too tightly, wondering why she wouldn’t knock on the damn door.

 

It was just a door, separating Lexa from the outside world, giving her shelter and privacy, so why couldn’t Clarke just knock on it? She knew Lexa needed to be at work, and couldn’t stop her heart from pounding in fear.

 

Gracie was very sweet, especially to her and sometimes Clarke was taken back by it, but Gracie was also a kid. A toddler and Clarke had no idea what she was doing.

 

Did she leave her alone to play by herself? Would Gracie even want to play with her? What was she going to talk about with a two year old all day? Was Gracie even going to like Clarke after this? Was Clarke going to _like_ Gracie after this? Just as Clarke worked up the courage to knock on the door, it came flying open. Lexa was dressed in her usual work attire, tattoos on display with Gracie on her hip.

 

“What are you doing just standing out there, weirdo?” Lexa asked with a click of her tongue.

 

“I was getting ready to knock and then.. well, I was just… and then I..”

 

“Hey, it’s okay,” Lexa waved her off, not really paying attention. “Come on in. I just fed Gracie breakfast so she should be good for a while. If she does get hungry before lunch, just give her a snack and her milk. I stocked my fridge, so feel free to eat whatever. I should be home around dinner time.”

 

“Okay.” Clarke was nodding along with Lexa’s words, trying to keep up.

 

“I have to warn you,” Lexa muttered distractedly as she gathered her stuff. “Her new word is no.”

 

“Are you kidding?” Clarke sighed, knowing that today was going to be long, testing day.

 

“She’s getting it from this kid named Jason at daycare,” Lexa said in a rush. “She’s been telling me no constantly.”

 

“That’s totally reassuring.” Clarke tried not to roll her eyes.

 

“Don’t be afraid to be firm with her. Don’t let her tell you no.”

 

“Yeah, okay.”

 

“I mean it, Clarke.” Lexa said sternly.

 

“Okay.” Clarke agreed, walking Lexa to the door. “Have a nice day at work, honey.”

 

“Bye, sweetheart.” Clarke’s eyes widened when she heard her nickname finally fall out of Lexa’s mouth. She hadn’t been called that in a long time, but she could tell by how stiff Lexa went, that she didn’t mean for the word to come falling out of her mouth.

 

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean-“

 

“I’ve missed you calling me that.” Clarke breathed.

 

“Really?” Lexa asked in confusion.

 

“Of course I did. I thought I was doing something wrong.”

 

“Not you. All me.” Lexa said in a rush, not explaining why she stopped calling Clarke that, much to Clarke’s disappointment. “I really need to go.”

 

“Not without giving me a kiss.” Clarke tapped at her lips playfully. Lexa brought her in for a quick, but passionate kiss before finally pulling away and closing the door behind her.

 

“Okay, Clarke,” She said to herself. “You got this.”

 

They were both in the family room on opposite sides of the couch. Clarke felt silly, but she didn’t break eye contact with Gracie and vice versa. They were starting each other down, Gracie occasionally letting out a smile, making Clarke smile. They were a good ten minutes into their staring contest, both having no idea what to do with the other now that Lexa wasn’t around, before Clarke smelled something.

 

“Oh my god!” Clarke brought a hand up to cover her nose and mouth. “Is that you? Did you poop?”

 

“No!” Gracie shook her head, but a smile was coating her face.

 

“Come here so I can change you,” Clarke said before stopping. “Or attempt to change you.”

 

“No!” Gracie screamed before taking off upstairs.

 

“Lexa is totally making this up to me.” Clarke mumbled to herself before running after Gracie. Clarke checked the hall bathroom first, but Gracie wasn’t there. She walked further down the hall to Gracie’s bedroom and was seriously about to give up, until she heard giggling.

 

Clarke couldn’t help but smile at the fit of giggles she heard down the hall and followed them quietly. Clarke was confused when she rounded the corner and there was a door that was open. She had no idea there was even a room down here.

 

“Gracie, what are-“ Clarke immediately stopped talking when she realized what was happening. Gracie was deep into the room, which meant Clarke had to go in after her.

 

Clarke really didn’t want to go into the room. She recognized what it was the second she opened the door and wondered if Gracie knew this room was always here.

 

“Gracie, please. Come here now.” Clarke spoke, hoping that Gracie would listen. Gracie didn’t respond to her at all. She continued walking further into the room, much to Clarke’s disappointment.

 

She had no idea if Gracie knew what this was. She had no idea how to get out of this situation. Although she was freaking out on the inside, on the outside, she stayed calmed (well… sort of).

 

“Gracie, please!”

 

“This is mama’s room!” Gracie said happily, looking around in wonder. Clarke didn’t say anything. What would she say to that? She didn’t think she was going to have to do this while watching Gracie. She didn’t want to be in this room. She didn’t want to do this.

 

“It is, but let’s go.” Clarke said softly, waving Gracie over. Gracie looked around the room and looked at a picture. Clarke followed her line of sight, and had to hold in a gasp.

 

There on the other side of the room, was a picture of Lexa’s wife. Clarke covered her mouth with her hand, taking in how beautiful the woman was.

 

The photographer captured her smile beautifully, her eyes shining and her teeth the whitest Clarke had ever seen. She looked like she was looking at someone while she took the picture. Clarke had no doubt it was probably Lexa and Gracie. Clarke knew her smile would be bigger than Costia’s if Lexa was behind the camera, holding their new born baby. (Clarke frowned before quickly shaking her head. She had no idea where that thought came from).

 

Costia was light skinned, and Clarke could tell where Gracie got her curls from. The woman’s hair was curly, stopping just short of her shoulder. Her chocolate brown eyes resembled Gracie’s, and Clarke felt like she was invading Lexa’s private space.

 

The door had a lock on it, but it couldn’t have been locked because Gracie easily got in. Clarke looked around the room one more time, pictures of Costia everywhere before finally calling Gracie again.

 

“Gra-“ Clarke didn’t even finish calling her name, before the little girl appeared before her.

 

Gracie didn’t say anything as she wordlessly left the room and went into hers. She stood by the changing table, and it was as if her whole mood changed.

 

Clarke looked around the hall for a moment, but knew there was no answer to what just happened. Maybe Gracie did that on purpose. Maybe Gracie knew what Clarke was trying to do, and was putting her foot down.

 

Why else would she lead Clarke toward the room where her mama’s stuff was? Why else would Gracie suddenly become mute as Clarke picked her up to change her diaper? Clarke had a feeling Gracie did all of this on purpose, and was at a loss for words too.

 

She didn’t have time to come up with more theories or ponder over it. The only thing Clarke was focused on was the poopy diaper (and why Gracie was so quiet).

 

Gracie was usually babbling away about something, or just making noises. She hadn’t said, or attempted to say anything since Clarke laid her down, and it was starting to worry her.

 

She knew Gracie was smarter than people may believe. Clarke didn’t need a genius to figure out that Gracie knew what happened to her mama. It made Clarke frown before she undid Gracie’s diaper.

 

Clarke immediately gagged and changed her diaper as quickly as she could. She could just imagine Lexa behind her laughing and teasing her for not knowing how to change a diaper. She only messed up once and that was because she was rushing. The smell was potent, and Clarke wanted to be done.

 

When she was, she set Gracie down and the girl immediately took off. Clarke stayed back to go to the hall bathroom to wash her hands before heading downstairs with Gracie.

 

She found Gracie playing with some legos on the floor. She didn’t even look at Clarke as she came to sit down beside her. It did make Clarke feel a little better that Gracie shared some of her legos with her.

 

The house was quiet, which usually didn’t happened when Gracie was here. Clarke remembered enjoying quiet nights without Gracie on Friday nights and the house would be chaos the next morning when they would go pick her up. Clarke obviously knew something was wrong, and wasn’t sure she wanted to have this conversation.

 

“Where’s my mommy?” Gracie suddenly asked. Clarke smiled slightly before explaining what was going on.

 

“Lexa will be home-“

 

“Not Mowwy. Mama.” Gracie said to clarify, making Clarke’s face pale.

 

“Your other mommy?” Clarke asked dumbly, not ready to have this conversation with a two year old.

 

“Yes,” Gracie nodded. “My mommy told me I have two mommies.”

 

“Your mama is watching over you right now as you speak.” Clarke cleared her thoughts enough to piece that sentence together.

 

“She’s still in the sky? Mowwy keeps saying she’s up there.” Gracie asked sadly.

 

Clarke put her legos down and looked over to the little girl. Gracie’s bottom lip was poking out, and it was breaking Clarke’s heart.

 

“I’m afraid so.” Clarke nodded hesitantly, not knowing if she should be having this conversation with Gracie.

 

“Can she fly back down here?”

 

“I don’t think that’s how it works, honey.” Clarke said, wondering when she had become so soft.

 

“She went up there. Why can’t she come back down?” Gracie asked in confusion and Clarke started to fidget with her shirt.

 

“It’s not how it works.” Clarke repeated herself, not knowing what to say.

 

“How can I have a fawily without my mama?” Gracie’s face scrunched up in confusion and Clarke sighed.

 

“You and your mommy make a family.”

 

“Jason has two parents.” Gracie held up two fingers for emphasizes.

 

“Not everyone has two parents. Sometimes people just have a dad or a mom. Sometimes they have both.”

 

Gracie went back to building her legos before answering.

 

“Okay.” Gracie huffed. Clarke waited a minute to make sure she was in the clear before standing up.

 

“How about some lunch?” That seemed to brighten Gracie’s mood up. Clarke was just glad that she didn’t say no. She wanted to distract Gracie from all the wonders of the world. Clarke was starting to figure out that Gracie was very observant.

 

After Clarke heated up a frozen pizza, she gave Gracie some milk before laying her down in her bed. Clarke didn’t know if she should go downstairs or in Lexa’s room. Clarke felt like she was somehow invading Lexa’s privacy and walked back down the stairs. It helped that there was a baby monitor in the family room.

 

Clarke laid down on the couch and hoped the rest of the afternoon would go smoothly.

 

* * *

 

 

The nap helped Gracie tremendously. She was in a good mood the rest of the afternoon and hadn’t told Clarke no once. Clarke knew part of her good mood was because her mommy was coming home soon, and she was bringing home dinner. It went unspoken that Clarke was going to be eating with them when Clarke had called Lexa a few minutes ago.  

 

Clarke was currently chasing Gracie around, playing some game she made up. Clarke was the lion and Gracie was the princess. Gracie had to ran away to make sure she didn’t get eaten.

 

Clarke didn’t have it in her to say no when Gracie asked if she wanted to play with her. Clarke had straightened up a bit while Gracie was taking her nap, not wanting Lexa to come home to a dirty house. There was a stack of papers thrown haphazardly on the kitchen table, and Clarke busied herself with making the pile neat. Now, Clarke was losing all her sanity as she crawled around the house, roaring loudly and declaring that she was looking for a princess. Gracie would squeal and run in the opposite direction.

 

As Gracie was running down the hallway, the front door flew open, just as Clarke let out another loud roar.

 

Lexa immediately cracked up at the sight of the CEO on the floor, pretending to be a lion. Clarke quickly stood up as Gracie rushed toward her mother.

 

“Mommy! Mommy!” Gracie screamed as she ran across the hall.

 

“Hey, sweet girl.” Lexa purred as she walked into the kitchen to put the bags of food down, before turning around and picking Gracie up.

 

“Were you a good girl?” Lexa asked as Clarke was brushing herself off.

 

“Mhm.” Gracie hummed and nodded. Lexa looked past Gracie to Clarke for clarification.

 

“She’s said no a few times, but nothing major.”

 

“That boy is corrupting my sweet girl.” Lexa held Gracie close to her, and Gracie wrapped her arms tightly around Lexa’s neck.

 

“You got Olive Garden for dinner?” Clarke asked as she walked into the kitchen, rubbing her belly.

 

“I hope that’s okay?” Lexa asked with a slight cringe. “Gracie loves the noodles and breadsticks.”

 

“That’s funny, because so do I.” Clarke gave Lexa a warm smile, which the brunette returned.

 

“Why don’t you go wash your hands for dinner?” Lexa asked to Gracie. The little girl frowned before trying to speak.

 

“N-“

 

“Gracie, you better not tell me no.” Lexa said suddenly annoyed. Her daughter had been saying it a lot recently.

 

Gracie frowned again, knowing that it wouldn’t be smart to disobey her mother and finally nodded.

 

“Okay.”

 

Once Gracie left, Lexa turned around to face Clarke.

 

“I ought to talk to Jason’s parents.”

 

“Go easy on them.”

 

“She’s never told me no before. She’s very respectful and I know she spends most of her time with Jason, and now suddenly no is the only thing she wants to say.”

 

Clarke walked over to Lexa, slowly wrapping her arms around her neck.

 

“Then maybe you should, but be nice about it,” Clarke sighed into her neck. “I missed you. We both did.”

 

“I missed you too.” Lexa smiled before quickly pulling Clarke into a kiss. They let their lips rest against each other for a moment, before pulling away.

 

“There’s something I want to talk to you about.” Clarke said hesitantly as she pulled away from Lexa to get the plates. Clarke didn’t know how to bring up the topic, but she wanted Lexa to know about it.

 

“Okay. What is it?” Lexa asked as she started pulling containers of food out of the bags.

 

“I-“

 

“Done mommy!” Gracie appeared in the kitchen and Clarke clamped her mouth shut.

 

“Did you take a bath in the water?” Lexa chuckled looking at her daughters soaked arm sleeves, before looking back at Clarke. “What did you have to talk about?”

 

Clarke looked at Gracie happily in Lexa’s arms, and subtly shook her head. She didn’t want to have this conversation around Gracie.

 

“It can wait.” Clarke waved it off. Lexa frowned for a second before shaking it off.

 

“Let’s eat. Mommy had a long day.” Lexa said to Gracie before putting her in her high chair.

 

Clarke tried to force down the thoughts she had and focused on the fact that Lexa was finally home. It never failed to bring a smile to her face.

 

* * *

 

 

Even though Clarke spent the night, she still needed to head home to get ready for the dinner. They’d spent most of the morning together, both of them not having to work. It was nice to just lay in bed with Clarke and not have it be sexual. It was really nice until Gracie started banging on the door. They’d spent most of the morning, eating and relaxing. If Lexa was nervous about the dinner, she didn’t let it show.

 

Clarke, on the other hand, was freaking out, but Lexa insisted that she still wanted to go. There was nothing to calm down Clarke’s beating heart as it neared dinnertime.

 

Lexa had just gotten back from dropping Gracie off with Anya, so she could get ready without having Gracie running around. She went through her normal routine of getting ready before the doorbell rang. Lexa answered the door in just her bra and boxers, knowing it was Clarke.

 

“Hey.” Lexa mumbled, stepping aside to let Clarke in.

 

“I hope this isn’t what you’re wearing to dinner.” Clarke joked, placing a brief kiss to Lexa’s cheek.

 

“It’s not. I’m actually having trouble picking which shirt to wear, but you look great as always.” Lexa complimented as they walked up the stairs. Clarke was in a short blue dress, a black blazer over it and dark heels. Her hair was in curls over her shoulder. She looked breathtaking, and Lexa would’ve spent more time appreciating how short her dress was, if it wasn’t for the fact that she had no idea what to wear.

 

Clarke sat back quietly, watching Lexa change into a variety of shirts before she motioned her over.

 

“I changed my shirt about five times,” Lexa muttered under her breath, buttoning up her flannel as Clarke appeared behind her. “Should I have it buttoned or no?”

 

“Keep it open. The tank top shows off your abs.” Clarke whispered into her neck, placing a small kiss against it.

 

“How do I look?” Lexa asked, smoothing down her shirt.

 

“Navy looks amazing on you,” Clarke breathed into her ear. “You should wear it more often.”

 

Clarke hand her arms wrapped around Lexa’s waist. She knew so many things were already testing them, and knew this dinner was either going to make them or break them.

 

Clarke didn’t even bother trying to pray that this was going to go well. She knew it wasn’t. She knew no matter how hard or how many times she’d prayed, her mother wasn’t going to back down, solely because they’re having dinner with Lexa instead of Finn.

 

Clarke blew out a deep breath, locking eyes with Lexa. She knew behind those brave green eyes, she was terrified. Who wouldn’t be? Clarke had tried to prepare her as much as she could, but Clarke didn’t know how to prepare either.

 

Her mother could be so unpredictable sometimes. What if she even ended up being nice? Clarke quickly shook her head because she knew that wasn’t going to happen. Her mother was never going to back down.

 

“No matter what happens, I’ll have your back.” Clarke said as she slid inside Lexa’s Mustang.

 

“I don’t want to come between you and your family. If it gets to that point, I’ll leave.”

 

“It’s going to be okay.” Clarke squeezed Lexa’s arms as she pulled out of the driveway.

 

“I don’t know about that, but sure.” Lexa offered her a small smile and they drove in silence down to Clarke’s parents house.

 

* * *

 

 

It was bigger than Clarke’s house, if that was even possible. It was closed off by gates that Clarke had to get buzzed in for them to open. Their house covered a lot of land. Land that Lexa couldn’t help but imagine Gracie running around in, instead of the tiny quarters of her backyard now. They hardly ever played back there, instead at the park just a couple minutes away.

 

The grass was the greenest Lexa had ever seen, and every step leading up to the house had an evergreen plant on it.

 

Lexa drove slowly down the driveway, wondering why the hell it was so long. She glanced over at Clarke, who was focusing on the American flag that was out front. Lexa took a deep breath before parking the car.

 

“Ready?” Lexa asked as she got out the car. The house looked even bigger up front. It was made out of brick and had a three car garage. Lexa didn’t even _own_ a garage.

 

“You know what,” Clarke said, stopping in her tracks. “We don’t have to do this. No one is physically making us go to this, so to hell with it. We can turn back around right now.”

 

Lexa stopped in the middle of the driveway with Clarke, the sun shining bright behind her. Clarke’s blonde hair looked golden in the bright sun, almost making Clarke look like an angel.

 

“Are you having second thoughts?” Lexa asked softly, stepping closer to Clarke.

 

“I just don’t know if we’re ready for this. I mean… we aren’t even together, and I can already list ten things that will go wrong within the first five minutes.”

 

Lexa smiled softly at Clarke, placing a hand on her arm.

 

“I survived my wife’s death, and yes, I’m going to play that card,” Lexa said before Clarke could interrupt. “I’m a single parent and I’m raising my daughter all by my lonesome, so I think I can handle your mother.”

 

“Okay, but do you think we could have a code for when we want to get the hell-“

 

Clarke had no time to finish her sentence. They had no time to go over how they were going to go about this, before the front door was ripped open.

 

Her mother was standing in the doorway, apron around her waist, staring them both down.

 

Lexa visibly swallowed and removed her hand from Clarke’s arm. Clarke sighed heavily, knowing they couldn’t turn back now and softly yanked on Lexa’s wrist as they both continued down the driveway.

 

“I’m so glad both of you could make it.” Abby said with a polite smile, but her eyes were locked on Lexa. Lexa cleared her throat and handed the older woman over the wine.

 

“Clarke said your favorite was Moscato.”

 

“Let’s get inside.” Abby said, reluctantly taking the brown paper bag out of Lexa’s hand. Lexa frowned when Abby didn’t even bother to say thank you, but didn’t say anything about it.

 

The house was a mixture of old and new. Modern art clad every empty wall space they could find, along with pictures from Clarke’s childhood. Lexa’s footsteps echoed against the wooden hard floors as they walked further into the house.

 

Abby explained how Jake was still upstairs getting ready and Lexa admitted how beautiful their house was. There were too many expensive things laying around. Lexa knew she could never have something so valuable as that crystal ball sitting on the coffee table, because Gracie would wreck it in two seconds. This house certainly wasn’t built for little kids.

 

“Make yourselves at home. Dinner is almost ready,” Abby called over her shoulder. “Can I get you anything to drink?”

 

“Beer if you have it.” Lexa decided to ignore the look Abby gave her and stuck close to Clarke. Lexa was nervous that she would somehow mess up their house.

 

“I can sit there and you can sit across from my dad.” Clarke said as they quietly made their way into the dining room.

 

“I’m okay, Clarke.” Lexa said while nodding. “You don’t have to do this.”

 

“Just say the word and we’ll go.”

 

“I’ll be fine.” Lexa assured her, getting ready to pull her in for a kiss when she remembered where she was. Even though there was a wall separating them, Lexa feared that Abby had x-ray vision and could tell she was getting handsy with her daughter. Lexa didn’t have time for Abby to ridicule her right now.

 

  
“There she is!” Jake’s voice boomed around the room.

  
  
Clarke immediately walked over and gave her dad a hug.

  
  
“Hi, daddy!” Clarke said as Jake squeezed her to death. “Daddy this is Lexa. Lexa, this is Jake.”

  
  
“Hello, Jake. It’s nice to meet you.” Lexa held out her head and Jake shook her hand enthusiastically.

  
  
“Likewise,” Jake smiled. “Why don’t you two take a seat? We have everything covered.”

  
  
“Okay.” Lexa easily agreed as Jake slaughtered off into the kitchen to find his wife.

  
  
Lexa sat down and Clarke sat right next to her. Clarke’s parents were going to sit opposite from them, and Lexa hoped Jake would be sitting in front of her.

  
  
He wasn’t.

  
  
Abby went out of her way to sit across from Lexa and Lexa cursed mentally.

  
  
Abby almost tossed her the beer she wanted and poured everyone else a glass of wine. Lexa knew wine wasn’t going to settle her nerves tonight and beer had a way of calming her soul.

 

Lexa didn’t have a game plan. Should she compliment their house? Tell them how wonderful it was? Ask them how the hell they are affording this place? Lexa had no idea if she should talk first or let them talk first. They both looked like they had a lot of questions and Lexa didn’t know if she had all the answers.

  
  
She glanced at Clarke quickly before settling back on her plate. She didn’t want to be accused by Abby that she was leering at her daughter, even though that was exactly what she was doing.

  
  
Lexa hated that the first time she was meeting Clarke’s parents, that there was so much tension and hostility around. No one was speaking. Hardly even looking at each other. Wasn’t this a dinner where they could get to know Lexa better?

  
  
Lexa took a sip of her beer and immediately her thoughts diminished. She knew she had made the right choice of drink, and looked up.

  
  
Lexa almost choked on the food she wasn’t eating when she found Abby’s eyes piercing into hers. The grip she had on her napkin, was like a leash keeping her back. Abby looked like she wanted to attack her, and Lexa wouldn’t be surprised if she actually did.

  
  
“So, you’re the one that gave my daughter her first tattoo?” Abby finally spoke, rolling her shoulders, like she was uncomfortable even having a conversation with Lexa.

 

“And you’re the one that practically drove her to me.” Lexa wanted to cringe as soon as the words fell out of her mouth. She couldn’t help it. It wasn’t like Lexa tied Clarke down and forced her to get a tattoo. She had given Clarke plenty of chances to change her mind, but Clarke was persistent.

  
  
Abby raised her eyebrows at the statement, but Jake kept quiet, trying to figure out how his wife was going to respond.

  
  
“Excuse me?” Abby scoffed in offense.

 

Lexa looked at Clarke briefly and she was giving her a look that said: _you already dip your toe in, you might as well get your whole foot wet._ Lexa looked over to Jake, who was practically on the edge of his seat waiting for Lexa to explain herself. Abby was boring holes in the side of her face, her jaw clenched right.  

  
  
“Imagine having your life so messed up, the only thing that kept you grounded was doing something for yourself. It was something as exhilarating as getting a tattoo. I may have put that ink pen to her skin, but I wasn’t the one that drove her to get the tattoo.”

  
  
Jake’s eyes widened at how brave Lexa was being. Abby had her hand wrapped tight around her wine glass, and Lexa could just see the smirk on Clarke’s face, she didn’t need to look at her to see it. Abby sat back in her seat, her food long forgotten and her eyebrows still raised.   


“And you think I was the one who drove her to do it?” Abby questioned. “Her life was fine until you came into it.”

  
  
“She was bored. She was looking for a way out, even if she didn’t know it. Sure, she could’ve been all about the wedding planning, but that was to get her mind off of what really matters and that was, she wasn’t happy.”

  
  
“So, all of a sudden you just know?” Abby’s face scrunched up. “You just know my daughter?”

  
  
“It’s amazing the things you learn from spending time with someone.”

  
  
Clarke had stayed silent, burying her face in her plate. Lexa was a big girl and could take care of herself. No one was yelling yet, so Clarke took that as a good sign.

  
  
“You don’t know anything about her. She’s changing in ways I never thought and you can thank yourself for that.” Abby spat, looking at Lexa in disgust.

  
  
“I will thank myself for it, because she’s actually living her life instead of just trying to please you.”

  
  
“She wasn’t going to marry Finn just to please me. She was going to marry him because she loves him!”

  
  
“No, she doesn’t.” Lexa said simply, almost in boredom. Lexa had to admit, it was fun watching Abby squirm in her seat.

  
  
“I can’t believe this is the woman you left Finn for. At least she could have a decent job. Drawing on people for money, is stupid.”

  
  
Lexa chewed her bottom lip to give her something to do. She busied herself by shoving some vegetables in her mouth. She clicked her jaw left and right, and had to remind herself that this was Clarke’s mother.

  
  
“It’s not stupid. Your daughter tells me she used to love art and drawing.”

  
  
“She could never get a decent job with that type of degree.”

  
  
“Honey, stop.” Jake finally cut in. 

  
  
“What? It’s true.” Abby reassured Jake who just shook his head helplessly.

 

“It keeps a roof over my daughter and I so it’ll never be stupid. What’s stupid is you trying to belittle me for the job that I have. You practically have this whole town against tattoos, so you should be proud of yourself.”

 

Clarke knew if she didn’t cut in now, there would be words neither of them could take back. This dinner wasn’t going anywhere near planned, but Clarke wasn’t all that surprised. She was an idiot to think her mother could act like a decent human being.

 

“Mom, please back off.” Clarke finally cut in. They all went back to their food, but it wasn’t long before Abby cleared her throat.

 

“How’s your daughter?” Abby asked and Lexa shook her head.

 

“I’m not going to discuss my daughter with you.”

 

Lexa hated the smirk that grew on Abby’s face. She raised her hands up in apologize.

 

“I just think it’s a beautiful thing,” Abby sighed, sipping on her wine. “To bring a baby into this cruel world.”

 

“It is,” Lexa agreed. “But I won’t have you saying anything about her.”

 

“How heartless do you think I am?” Abby gasped and placed a hand over her heart. “I would never.”

 

Lexa didn’t respond. She continued to cut up her food and eat it, wishing she was anywhere but here.

 

“You know I had a miscarriage around the age Clarke is now.” Abby spoke after she wiped her mouth with a napkin. She wouldn’t look at her husband or daughter, her focus was zoned in on Lexa.

 

“Mom-” Clarke went to tell her to stop talking, but Abby held her hand up.

 

“I had it all figured out. Her name, what she was going to wear when she came home. I was so excited, planning out everything I wanted to do and teach her when she was born. I was going to name her Emma and I was going to cherish her until the day I die. I lost her halfway through and I went to countless doctors who told me that I couldn’t have kids.”

 

“I’m so sorry to hear that, Abby.” Lexa spoke humbly, but Abby ignored her.

 

“I wasn’t expecting Clarke. She was a…. _miracle_. I got her whatever she wanted, whenever she wanted it. She had the biggest swing set on the block and the biggest room in the house.”

 

“Alright, mom, that’s enough.”

 

Lexa looked back and forth between Clarke and Abby, wondering where this story was going. Lexa absolutely hated the look on Clarke’s face and Jake had his face buried in his plate.  

 

“I wasn’t as thrilled when I heard I was pregnant with Clarke. I still planned for it as best I could. Clarke was just two weeks shy of her birth-date. She came out healthy, absolutely nothing wrong with her. We took her to many doctors to make sure. I didn’t want anything to be wrong, and there wasn’t. Clarke was an absolute miracle because I wasn’t supposed to have any kids.”

 

Lexa waited and waited until Abby finally got to her point. By that time, Jake was trying to stop her and Clarke had tears running down her face. Lexa sucked in a breath, and placed a hand on Clarke’s thigh, but she pushed it away.

 

“Clarke was everything I could’ve wanted, but she wasn’t Emma. That emotional connection I had with Emma, I’ll never forget. One day, we were completely fine and the next, she was taken from me. It broke my heart. I didn’t have the dreams I had when I was pregnant with Emma. I had no idea who Clarke was going to be. If it wasn’t for her being successful-”

 

“What? You would act like she doesn’t exist until the day she tells you she wants to get married?” Lexa finally cut in, trying to piece together what Abby was telling her.

 

“Exactly.” Abby purred.

 

“That’s enough, Abby!” Jake butted in as Clarke wiped away her tears. Lexa sat back because she had no idea that Clarke was a miracle baby. She had no idea that Abby was pregnant before Clarke.

 

“If you’ll excuse me.” Clarke said quickly, not even bothering to wipe away her tears. Lexa would’ve gone after her, but the look Abby was giving her made her stay in her spot.

 

“I’m sorry you had a miscarriage.” Lexa said slowly, not knowing what to say now that she was alone. She knew Clarke was upset and her mind was only on her.

 

“It’s in the past now,” Abby waved off. “I’m surprised you didn’t know, since you know my daughter so well.”

 

“I didn’t-“

 

“Well now you do.” Abby spoke over her, and Lexa was starting to figure out she had no idea the type of power Abby held over her family.

 

Lexa had nothing bad to say about Jake, but how could he just sit there by this woman’s side while his daughter was balling her eyes out in the bathroom?

 

“I didn’t want another kid after Emma, let alone another daughter, but I managed and I tried to be the best I could. I don’t know,” Abby faked a sigh. “She seems to be doing pretty good.”

 

Lexa swallowed hard at the way Abby’s eyes darkened. She wished Clarke would make an appearance right about now.

 

“She would be better if you left her alone.”

 

“Abby, that’s enough!” Jake roared. “You can’t keep acting like this.”

 

“Don’t tell me how to act.” Abby growled and Lexa frowned, feeling very uncomfortable.

 

“You can’t threaten the one person that makes our daughter happy and you know it.”

 

“She could never make Clarke happy,” Abby said as Clarke came creeping around the corner. She didn’t walk back into the room yet. She wanted to see what her mother was going to say. “Clarke will realize it sooner or later when she starts paying for all of her daughter’s stuff because she can’t afford it, or when she has to start paying her bills-“

 

“I pay my bills just fine.” Lexa grumbled from across the table.

 

“For now.” Abby added vaguely and Clarke finally stepped into the room.

 

“Can you please just stop?” Clarke asked in exhaustion, not knowing how much longer she could put up with her mother’s awful behavior.

 

Clarke was surprised Lexa didn’t look the least bit affected by what her mother had said. Clarke didn’t know how she did it. She already had to excuse herself to wipe away her tears.

 

“Honey, I didn’t mean to make you cry.” Abby frowned, but Clarke waved her off. She sat down and started cutting into her steak again.

 

“You didn’t have to tell that story.” Clarke said, her voice hoarse.

 

“I just thought since you two know each other so well, she would want to hear it.”

 

“Or you’re just evil.” Clarke blurted out. She immediately stopped cutting her steak and looked up at her mother in horror. “Mom, I didn’t-“

 

“No, it’s okay,” Abby shrugged it off. Lexa was disgusted by the smirk slowing spreading across her lips.

 

The dinner table was silent. Lexa wasn’t all that surprised Jake hadn’t said anything. Lexa knew he loved her daughter, but Lexa was starting to see where his loyalty lied.

 

Abby took a moment to glance at Clarke. Underneath the smirk, Lexa could see the hurt and it gave her satisfaction (and reassurance that Abby was actually human). It didn’t last long. Abby immediately fixed her face as if her daughter didn’t just insult her, and focused back on Lexa.

 

“So, where did you go to college?”

 

“Oh, I didn’t.”

 

“You’re a single mom, raising your daughter without a college degree?” Lexa heard someone groan from the background and she wasn’t sure if it was Jake or Clarke.

 

“College isn’t for everyone. Costia, my wife, went, but I never did.”

 

“Well, How convenient is that? She can’t help you from up there.” Abby pointed to the direction of the sky.

 

“Mother-“

 

“You keep wondering if Clarke is serious about you, but are you serious about Clarke? I mean you’re a widow. You probably don’t want to get married again.”

 

“I think that’s my decision to make.” Lexa countered. She was having a hard time keeping up with all the curve-balls Abby was throwing, but she supposed she was doing all right.

 

“And mine also.” Clarke piped in.

 

“You guys aren’t getting married.” Abby chuckled from around the rim of her wine glass, like it was the most ridiculous thing she’d ever heard.

 

“You don’t know that,” Lexa smirked, trying to get a rise out of Abby and it was working. “What if I do have a plan to marry her?”

 

“You guys aren’t even together.”

 

“That could change.” Lexa shutdown Abby’s concerns. “That could all change.”

 

“But it won’t. Clarke hasn’t officially called off the wedding yet, so her relatives still think it’s happening.”

 

Lexa took a moment to sip her beer to wash down the food. She put her beer bottle down and looked Abby directly in the eye.

 

“That can change too.”

 

“No, it won’t!” Abby slammed her hands down on the table, making Clarke jump. “She’s not calling off the damn wedding. The only reason I’m being so patient right now is because I’m waiting for Clarke to realize that this is some mid-life crisis even though she’s twenty-four. She will not end up with someone like you.”

 

“Okay, I think dinner is done. Lexa, why don’t you give me a hand?” Jake stood up from where he was.

 

“Oh, daddy. Lexa’s the guest. I’ll help.”

 

Jake looked at Lexa pleading, before she got the hint.

 

“No, it’s okay,” Lexa put a hand on Clarke’s shoulder. “I got it.”

 

Lexa would do just about anything to get away from Abby and quickly jumped on it. She gathered up the empty plates and followed Jake into the kitchen.

 

“Should we leave them alone together?” Lexa asked warily, looking over her shoulder, but Clarke looked perfectly fine.

 

“Probably not, but I just wanted to apologize and I know I can’t do it in front of her,” Jake said quietly. “You probably think I’m a chicken, but you don’t understand.”

 

“I think I do.” Lexa found herself being more confident than she felt. “She holds a lot of power of you. The both of you.”

 

“I should’ve known she wasn’t going to go easy. I’m really sorry and I don’t have any problems with you being with my daughter. Even though this dinner has gone completely wrong, I still have never seen my daughter as happy as she’s been with you. She never smiled that way while she was with Finn.”

 

Lexa was getting ready to respond. She had no idea what she was going to say, but she just wanted to thank Jake for going out of his way to make her feel accepted. Lexa never got the chance before she heard a chair screech against the floor before the front door flew open.

 

Lexa walked back into the dining room, preparing to go after Clarke, but was very surprised when she found Clarke sitting at the table. Abby had finally left the dinner table.

 

“What happened?” Lexa asked skeptically.

 

Clarke looked back at the front door before turning around to look at Lexa and her dad.

 

“Nothing. It’s okay. Let’s get dessert.” Clarke stood up and smoothed down her dress. By the look on Clarke’s face, Lexa knew it wasn’t nothing, but Lexa wasn’t going to question it in front of Clarke’s dad.

 

* * *

 

 

As it was nearing time to go, Abby was still outside doing who knows what. Lexa was almost afraid to go and see, but Clarke and Jake were occupied so she took this as her opportunity.

 

It wasn’t hard to find Abby. She was sitting on the swing on the porch and Lexa knew this was a terrible idea, but they were getting ready to leave and Lexa didn’t want Abby to have the last word.

 

Lexa didn’t say anything as she quietly closed the door. Clarke had offered to do the dishes with Jake, so Lexa slipped out. She walked over to where Abby was and leaned against the banister.

 

“What do you want?” Abby scrunched her face up, wondering why Lexa was standing before her.

 

“I want to tell you how wrong you are,” Lexa said calmly. “You may think you know your daughter, but you don’t.”

 

Abby scoffed, but she didn’t say anything and Lexa continued.

 

“You only know the parts you are willing to see. Like the fact that she is CEO. That she’s making money to please you. She was going to get married to please you too, until she realized that she wasn’t happy.”

 

“She was cheating. That’s why she doesn’t want to get married.”

 

“Finn was cheating way longer than she was.”

 

“I’m not having this conversation with you.”

 

“Then I’ll talk and you listen.”

 

“I’m not listening to a word you have to say!” Abby said, starting to get upset, but Lexa just ignored her.

 

“I know I would want to be there for my daughter through everything. I know I can’t be, but I would try. I think it’s very selfish of you to purposely go out of your way to make-“

 

“Stop talking.” Abby suddenly said, eyes dark and jaw locked. “Just stop.”

 

Lexa stayed quiet, wondering what Abby had up her sleeve. Lexa took a few steps back when Abby stood up.

 

“This isn’t how this is going to work,” Abby chuckled. “You aren’t going to threaten me. I threaten you.”

 

“Abby-“

 

“I told you to stop talking,” Abby said irritated. “You don’t get the last word. I do. Clarke will realize it and when she does, she’ll leave you. She’ll leave your daughter and your pathetic little life behind. My daughter will _never_ be happy with you. You need to understand that.”

 

Lexa didn’t know why she was choosing this exact moment to let Abby’s words get to her, when she lasted a whole dinner with her spewing out mean things. The words stung and Lexa was left speechless.

 

Lexa also didn’t know why Clarke chose this exact moment to walk out the door. The blonde looked taken back that they were both on the porch, in close proximity.

 

“Everything okay?” Clarke asked, though her face screamed she didn’t want to know.

 

“Fine,” Lexa chirped. “Are you ready to go?”

 

“I am,” Clarke smiled softly. “Dad gave us a chocolate cake. I was thinking we could share with Gracie when we get home.”

 

“Oh my god.” Abby muttered from under her breath. She didn’t say anything to either of them as she made her way to the front door.

 

“Enjoy your time playing house. You’ll get tired of it eventually.” Abby threw them a charming smile before closing the door behind her.

 

“What were you two talking about?” Clarke asked, feeling like she could finally breathe now that there was a door separating them from her mother.

 

“It was nothing.” Lexa said, pulling on Clarke’s wrist so they could leave. “Let’s just go.”

 

“I’m with you there.” Clarke immediately said. “I’m really sorry. So sorry. Anything you want, I’ll give it to you.”

 

“I don’t want your money.” Lexa said as she backed out of the driveway.

 

“That’s not what I meant.” Clarke flattered. “Please don’t let her get inside your head.”

 

“She wasn’t exactly wrong. There is a huge gap in pay when it comes between you and I.”

 

“I don’t care about that.” Clarke frowned.

 

“But you will.” Lexa said quietly, not looking at Clarke and deciding to focus on the road.

 

Clarke didn’t say anything and Lexa nodded subtly.

 

“She’s getting to you.” Clarke muttered. “I thought you were good.”

 

“I am. I just-“ Lexa stopped talking. She didn’t know how to voice her thoughts.

 

“I could make this up in sexual favors.” Clarke smirked, placing a hand on Lexa’s thigh.

 

“That’s not necessary.” Lexa shook her head, jerking away from Clarke’s hand.

 

“Lexa-“

 

“Let’s just focus on getting home and getting Gracie the chocolate cake before bedtime.”

 

Clarke took a moment to see how tense Lexa was, and knew this wasn’t the right time to talk about what happened while she was babysitting. It had only been a day and Clarke didn’t know if Gracie had gone back into the room or not. Clarke had no idea if she should tell Lexa what Gracie told her.

 

Clarke decided that they’d been through enough for one weekend and left it alone. There would be plenty of other times to talk about it, but not after a disastrous dinner they just had with her parents.

 

Clarke kept quiet the rest of the way and hoped this dinner didn’t ruin things between them.

 

* * *

 

 

It was Monday morning and Clarke left before Gracie or Lexa got up. Lexa knew she was being distant. It wasn’t exactly what Abby had said to her, but it was the position both of them were in. Lexa had no idea if things were going to work out between the both of them. Why the hell was she so confident that they would end up married?

 

Lexa was afraid she’d ruined things between them. She tried not to let it show as she got Gracie ready for the day. The little girl made the morning a little easier. Normally, Gracie would’ve already said no to about half the things that Lexa was saying, but to her surprise she wasn’t.

 

Lexa was almost sure Costia would be better at dealing with this than she was. Lexa was still figuring out the jist of motherhood, she wasn’t sure how to handle a sassy two year old.

 

After brushing Gracie’s hair up in a bun, they both wandered down the stairs. Lexa made a beeline for the pantry, but stopped in her tracks when she saw food on the stove.

 

A smile immediately washed over Lexa’s face when she realized Clarke must’ve cooked them breakfast.

 

“Pancakes!” Gracie pointed toward the stove and jumped up and down happily.

 

“I guess it is.” Lexa commented as she lifted Gracie in her highchair. She cut up her pancakes and gave her a few eggs, with two slices of bacon. Lexa still couldn’t stop the smile on her face as she sat down and ate her food with Gracie.

 

* * *

 

 

“Come on Gracie, let’s go.” Lexa said as she opened the door.

 

“No.” Gracie muttered, not looking at her mother. Lexa rolled her eyes and took a deep breath.

 

“If you don’t get out of the car right now, mommy will be late,” Lexa explained gently. “Do you want mommy to be late?”

 

“No.” Gracie said after a moment.

 

“So, will you get out of the car?” Lexa asked again.

 

“No.” Gracie shook her head. Lexa groaned before leaning down and picking her daughter up. “No!”

 

“Gracie, will you stop it?” Lexa pleaded. “Why do you keep telling me no?”

 

Gracie was kicking and screaming in her arms, trying to get back into the car.

 

“I don’t want to go!” Gracie screamed. “No!”

 

Lexa closed the door and walked toward the daycare, despite Gracie’s pleads.

 

“Jason will be there! And so will your other friends. You’ll get to play with them all day and then mommy will pick you up once she’s done with work.”

 

“No!” Gracie whimpered over and over again. It broke Lexa’s heart, but she needed to get going.

 

“I will be right back.” Lexa reassured her. Gracie stopped fighting in her arms and looked down at her.

 

“Promise?”

 

“I promise baby girl.” Lexa said, her heart still breaking at the sad look on her daughter’s face. “Don’t I always come back?”

 

“Yes.” Gracie replied.

 

“So, mommy will be back this time too,” Lexa kissed her on the cheek as she opened the doors to the daycare. She looked around and saw a woman next to Jason, and Lexa knew that was his mother. “Do you want to go see Ontari?”

 

“Yes.” Lexa gestured for the daycare provider to come over, which she happily did.

 

“Hey, Gracie!”

 

“Do you want to hang out with Ms. Ontari today?” Lexa asked in her ear and Gracie nodded. Lexa sighed in relief, noticing in the corner of her eye how Jason’s mother was getting ready to go. Lexa quickly handed over Gracie to Ontari before kissing her on the forehead.

 

“Mommy will be back later.” Lexa said, mouthing a thank you to Ontari before dashing out of the door.

 

“Are you Jason’s mother by any chance?” Lexa asked as she tried to catch up to the woman. “I’m sorry to track you down like this. I’m Gracie’s mother, Lexa.”

 

“Gracie?” The woman questioned as she turned around. “My son never shuts up about her.”

 

“I think your son might be corrupting my daughter.” Lexa said all in one breath and prepared for the attack, but there wasn’t one. She didn’t mean to get straight to the point, but she didn’t have a lot of time.

 

“Do you have time to grab a coffee?” The woman asked instead, completely catching Lexa off guard, but Lexa could tell by the look in her eyes, that something wasn’t right.

 

She wished someone had asked her years ago if she wanted coffee, even if she didn’t talk about what was bothering her. She knew her friends had asked, but she just wanted someone new, different. She wanted a stranger, because it was easier that way.

 

Lexa was conflicted because she knew she had a client soon. As they were walking down the sidewalk, Anya had texted her saying how her client cancelled last minute. It bummed Lexa out. She’d been working on the design for a while, and while she couldn’t blame her clients for backing out of getting a tattoo, she really needed the money.

 

Lexa quickly stuffed her phone back in her pocket. Now that she had time, she didn’t mind going to get a coffee with the woman. Lexa offered her a shy smile and a nod, making the other woman nod.

 

They walked down the street to the coffee shop around the corner.

 

“I’m sorry that I said those things about your son,” Lexa apologized as the silence was killing her. “I didn’t mean to just blurt it out like that. I don’t normally do this and I had a client but they just cancelled.”

 

“No, it’s okay.” The woman shook her head. “I’ve been such a terrible parent these days, I believe you. I’m sure your daughter is a sweetheart.”

 

“She is,” Lexa nodded. “She didn’t talk back or say no and she always does what I tell her, until recently and I think your son has something to do with that. I believe in the theory of terrible twos but this is different.”

 

They walked in the coffee shop and quickly order their drinks, glad that there wasn’t a line. Once their drinks were ready, they walked back outside.

 

“I am… _so_ sorry,” The woman apologized with a frown. She took a sip of her coffee, before sighing. “I’ve been fighting with his dad, my husband. Like really fighting. Fighting a little kid shouldn’t see or hear, so I just let him do whatever he wants and _I know_ that’s bad, but I don’t know what else to do. I know he knows that we fight.”

 

They continued to walk down the street, side by side, sipping on their coffee. Lexa wasn’t judging her. She was no saint in any situation, so she just listened to what the woman had to say.

 

“He kissed another girl,” The woman sighed deeply. “And we’ve been a mess ever since. We fight over the dumbest things and I hate it. I’ve been spending so much time trying to fix my marriage, I let my kid do whatever he wants. Oh, my god. I’m one of _those_ parents. You know, the ones that just have no control over their kids. I vowed I would never become one.”

 

Lexa sensed that there was more, and she was right. Lexa wished she could’ve spilled everything she was feeling years ago to a complete stranger and not get judged for feeling the things she did. She wouldn't interrupt this woman’s thoughts.

 

“I always tell Jason to go to his room or go watch TV, while we argue. I let him watch whatever he wants, but I still have parental control over it. My husband and I get in the worse arguments, sometimes we sugar coat things, sometimes we don’t. One day, Jason came into the kitchen and all he wanted was his cup of milk. His dad was going off on me because I kept checking his emails. He called me a bitch and… a cheese face, and Jason has been saying it ever since. He’s been telling me no. He’s just getting out of control and I’m letting it happen. Oh my god! I’m a terrible parent!”

 

Lexa took a look at the woman completely freaking out next to her, and stopped them in her tracks, grateful that there was a bench behind them. The sun was shining down on them, but the breeze kept them cool.

 

“Sit down.” Lexa finally spoke, and the woman listened to her.

 

“I was married. Well, I technically still am,” Lexa said to herself before shaking her head. “The point is, I would give anything to fight with her over something stupid. I would sell my soul. I would cut off my own arm and leg, if it meant for just a few seconds, I would be in her company.”

 

Lexa took a moment to herself, her own words breaking her heart.

 

“I mean no disrespect, but now I’m listening to a woman go on about how her marriage is falling apart, but you have the ability to fix it.” Lexa said, locking eyes with the woman.

 

“How?” She asked desperately.

 

“Because you’re still here,” Lexa reminded her. “You have the ability to do anything, because your heart's still beating. You’re still breathing and you have a chance to make things right. Stop fighting with your husband, because it’s not going to get you anywhere. If I was in your shoes, I’d do anything to make things better. I know he kissed someone, and you guys need to sit down and talk about it. Not fight over stupid things while your kid is in your house. Get your shit together,” Lexa took a breath after talking. “Respectfully.”

 

“No, you’re absolutely right,” The woman agreed. “I need to stop making things worse by picking fights with him. We need to sit down and talk about our marriage, and I just realized I never told you my name.”

 

Lexa offered her a small smile and an encouraging nod.

 

“Emori.” The woman introduced herself, holding out her hand.

 

Lexa took it softly. “Lexa.”

 

“I wished I would’ve introduced myself before I dropped a bomb on you.”

 

Lexa shook her head, with a slight chuckle, sipping on her coffee.

 

“I wished I would’ve met a you, when I was dealing with the loss of my wife.”

 

“I’m so sorry about that.”

 

“It’s okay, but I hate that she’s missing this. She’s missing out on her daughter’s life and it breaks my heart because it’s not like she’s at a hospital and I can go visit her and talk about our daughter. My wife is gone and it tears me apart when I think about it.”

 

“I’m so sorry, Lexa.” Emori breathed, a tear falling out of her eye. “I wouldn’t wish that upon anyone.”

 

“Me neither. Please, fix things with your husband.”

 

“How did she die?” Emori asked before wincing. “I’m sorry, you don’t have to answer that.”

 

“It was a plane crash a couple years ago. Gracie was just a baby when she died. She had no idea what was going on, but I would cry all day and night and just hold her close. She died before they could even get her to the hospital.”

 

Emori didn’t say anything, she just scooted closer to Lexa, placing a hand on her shoulder. Lexa offered her a slight smile, but it didn’t quite reach her eyes. It never did when she talked about her wife.

 

“I know we just met,” Emori whispered. “But, I’ll be here, if you want me to.”

 

“I think I might like that.” Lexa said, trying her best not to cry.

 

They sat there for a few minutes, just leaning on each other. Lexa looked up to the sky and her chest felt light, knowing that Costia wasn’t in pain anymore.

 

“Do you think we could just stay here for a while?” Emori asked after a minute. Neither one of them wanted to admit that they didn’t want to be alone, so they didn’t talk about it.

 

“I’d like that very much.” Lexa answered, finally giving Emori a proper smile, one in which she mirrored.

 

“Me too.”

 

* * *

 

 

The amount of housework Clarke had to do when she came home that Monday evening, stressed her out. It was hard taking care of this house without someone else. Granted Finn hardly cleaned, but he would at least straighten up a few things, but now Clarke had to do it all by herself. Clarke contemplated hiring a maid, but she wanted to prove to herself that she could do this. She wanted to prove that she could live without Finn.

 

Clarke knew she had a lot of things to do, and started with the pile of dishes falling out of her sink. After she did that, she gathered up the trash as best she could before putting it outside. She was at least grateful that the outside of her house looked nothing like the inside and with that in mind, she went back inside to finish cleaning.

 

A thin layer of sweat was starting to form on her brow as she vacuumed the carpet. Clarke was going from room to room, cleaning and noticed how lonely her house was. Without the noise of the vacuum, her house was eerily quiet. The only sound was the dishwasher running.

 

Clarke imagined briefly of a dog running around, before she realized that would probably never happen. She worked way too much to have a dog. But still, Clarke couldn’t shake the feeling that something was missing. The thought of her green-eyed beauty immediately flashed in her mind, and she started smiling. It wasn’t too late to invite them over, and Clarke didn’t live that far from Gracie’s daycare.

 

With a little pep in her step at seeing the girls, Clarke went back into the kitchen to retrieve her phone. Her thumb hovered over Lexa’s contact, before the doorbell rang. Clarke thought maybe Lexa had the same idea and quickly put her phone down. She didn’t know who else would be at her door, but Lexa and Clarke rushed to open it.

 

The last person she thought would be standing before her, was her former best friend. Eyes red from crying, and hunched over. Her brown eyes wide, pleading for Clarke not to slam the door on her. Clarke immediately folded her arms, glaring down the girl. She swallowed hard and waited for Raven to say something, because Clarke had nothing to say to her.

 

As the minutes passed, and it was becoming clear that Raven wasn’t going to speak, Clarke tried to close the door. Raven quickly stopped the door from closing on her with her hand. Clarke still didn’t say anything, because she knew all she would do was yell and she didn’t want to start a scene on her front porch. Clarke tried closing the door again, not wanting to hear anything Raven had to say to her, but Raven stopped her again.

 

“Raven!” Clarke finally grunted trying to close the door, but Raven pushed it open again.

 

“Clarke, please stop!” Raven pleaded, tears already falling out of her eyes. Clarke groaned. She didn’t want to deal with Raven or Finn. She’d been doing a good job at avoiding both of them. She wanted to focus on the fact that she was getting ready to invite Lexa over for a nice evening, maybe even talk about what happened while she babysat, but Raven wasn’t moving. “Can I come in?”


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Sin
> 
> I hope y'all enjoy!

There once was a time where Clarke told Raven everything. From how intimate her first kiss was, to the first and last time she had sex. Raven has seen Clarke completely break down, at what Clarke thought was her lowest point, but Raven always had a way of making it better. They were close. Really close and it broke Clarke’s heart that she was standing on the other side of this door, wondering what it would be like to just slam it in Raven’s face.

 

She hated that this was where they were now. After years of being by each other sides. Clarke honestly thought that Raven was her platonic soulmate. They did everything together. Clarke couldn’t lie and say she didn’t miss Raven over the past few weeks, but it couldn’t overlook the pure hatred Clarke had in her heart at seeing the girl.

 

Raven’s foot was jammed in between the door, trying not to let it close on her. Clarke wanted to throw open the door with open arms. She wanted them to cry it out, and laugh about it years later. She didn’t care about the relationship status between her and Finn, Raven had still crossed the line and slept with her fiancé.

 

“I just want to talk to you.” Raven murmured after a tense couple of minutes. “Please.”

 

“I don’t want to talk to you.” Clarke said stubbornly. “So, just leave.”

 

“I’m not leaving. I’ll stay out here all night and you know I will.”

 

“If you’re looking for my forgiveness, Raven, you’re not going to get it.” Clarke crossed her arms over her chest. She was afraid of what might happened if she didn’t. She didn’t know if she wanted to hug or hurt Raven, so she kept her arms wrapped tightly around her waist.

 

“You’re my best friend.” Raven frowned. “We’ve been through everything and now, you’re just going to give it up?”

 

“I’ll give up our friendship if I want to,” Clarke spat, getting angry. “I’m not the one who was sleeping with the other’s fiancé.”

 

“I-“ Raven opened up her mouth to speak, but quickly stopped. Clarke tilted her head cockily, before scoffing.

 

“I’ll just close the door now.” Clarke said, using as much strength as she could to close the door.

 

“Clarke!” Raven called desperately. “Clarke!”

 

Clarke didn’t bother hearing anything else Raven had to say. She roughly closed the door and slid down it. The tears were falling before she could stop them.

 

She was trying not to let Raven get to her, but she did. She hated the twisted part of her that missed Raven. She knew if this had happened and Raven wasn’t the one to blame, she knew Raven would be there for her every step of the way. She knew she had Harper and even Octavia, but they didn’t beat the one person who knew her best.

 

Clarke let out a quiet sob before wiping her tears away and getting up from the floor. She decided to busy herself with cleaning and tried to let the image of Raven standing there pleading for her to forgive her out of her mind.

 

* * *

 

 

Lexa was glad that she didn’t have to fight Gracie on going to daycare today. The little girl happily got out of the car and held her mother’s hand. Lexa kissed her daughter goodbye after handing her over to Ontari and was out the door for another long day of work.

 

“Hey, Lexa!” Lexa heard her name being called and turned around. She smiled slightly at the shorter brunette making her way over to her. Her hair was down, and she as wearing jeans and a dark blouse.

 

“Hey, Emori!” Lexa responded with just as much enthusiasm as they both walked outside.

 

“This may sound a little forward, but I just wanted to thank you for your insight,” Emori said as they walked down the sidewalk, avoiding all the other mother’s dropping off. “Things aren’t the greatest, but we’re trying to work it out, especially when Jason is around. I just wanted to see if you were available next week to have lunch with me and two other friends. If not, I totally understand.”

  
  
Lexa’s cheeks immediately turned red. She didn’t know why she was so shy about this. She had friends, but the majority of them worked with her. She didn’t have any other friends who were mother’s like her.

 

“Yes, of course. I would really like that,” Lexa said after a moment, trying to keep her cool, even though she was really excited about it. “I’m free in about two weeks for lunch.”

  
“Great, that should work,” Emori flashed her a smile. “You’ll love the girls. Their kids go here too.”

 

“I’m looking forward to it.” Lexa said as they came to a stop in front of her Mustang.

 

“Nice ride.” Emori nodded in approval.

 

“Thank you. It was a gift.”

 

“It’s a really nice gift,” Emori said, admiring the car before looking back at Lexa. “Well, I’ll let you go. See ya then!”

 

“Bye!” Lexa said, giggling like a little girl when she got into her car before speeding off.

 

* * *

 

 

As the week came to an end for Lexa, nothing sounded better than hanging out with her best friend and drinking beer. Lexa wasn’t a big drinker, but she could use it tonight. Clarke was working late, and wouldn’t be out in time, so Lexa used this time to spend with Anya.

 

She dropped Gracie off with Charlotte before making her way back home. She straightened up a bit before ordering a few pizzas to the house.

 

Since Anya was closing up the shop while Lexa took off early to pick Gracie up, she figured she would pick up the alcohol on the way to her house.

 

Lexa was using this time, to do some of the dishes while she waited for the pizza and Anya.

 

On the other side of town, Anya parked her car as she made her way into the liquor store. She was stocking up on beers and a bottle of wine when she felt a presence behind her.

 

“I should’ve known I was going to find you here.” Anya joked over her shoulder and Raven let out a snort.

 

“I could say the same for you.” Raven said as Anya turned around to face the girl. She was carrying a basket full of tequila.

 

“Planning on getting wasted again?” Anya asked, eyeing the drink.

 

“Something like that,” Raven shrugged. “If you aren’t too busy, you could join me.”

 

Anya took a moment to appreciate how good Raven looked. She was dressed in jeans and a tight black shirt. Her hair was up in a ponytail and Anya swore she’d never seen someone so pretty.

 

“As tempting as that sounds…” Anya trailed off, hating the disappointed look on Raven’s face. “I have plans with Lexa tonight.”

 

“Oh, right.” Raven nodded, but the frown on her face didn’t leave. Anya rocked on the bottom of her heels, not knowing what to do.

 

“Maybe some other time?” Anya asked hopefully. Raven offered her a small smile in return.

 

“Maybe.”

 

They both checked out at the same time and walked out the door. Anya still felt awkward about turning Raven down, but knew Lexa wouldn’t be okay with her bailing on her for Raven.

 

“It’s a nice night tonight.” Raven commented as they walked side by side.

 

“It is, isn’t it?” Anya said, looking up at the clear night sky.

 

As they made their way to Anya’s car, she unlocked her car and shoved the drinks in the back.

 

“I guess I’ll see you around?” Anya asked. Raven nodded and by Anya’s complete surprise, stepped closer to her.

 

Anya could see just how deep Raven’s eyes were, and hated how sweaty her hands were getting. It had been a while since she took interest in anyone.

 

So, why did she stop Raven once she started leaning in? The girl pinned her up against the car and started leaning into her. Anya allowed herself to be held by the girl. The girl’s hands were tight around her waist and the second Anya could feel Raven’s sweet breath against her lips, she backed away.

 

Raven shot her another disappointed look but immediately back away.

 

“I’m sorry, Raven, I can’t.” Anya apologized weakly.

 

“Of course. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have tried.” Raven shook her head. “I wasn’t even thinking.”

 

“I just don’t think this will be a good idea. I don’t know what else to say.” Anya breathed out. She knew she was attracted to Raven, but trying to make this something would be too complicated right now.

 

“I understand, Anya. You don’t have to explain yourself. I’m the town’s screw up. Of course you don’t want to be with me.”

 

“I never said-“

 

“I guess I’ll just go now.” Raven said and didn’t give Anya a chance to redeem herself as she turned on her heel and left Anya there helplessly.

 

* * *

 

 

Lexa had barely seen Clarke this week. She had a nice time relaxing with Anya on Friday night before they had a busy day Saturday. It was Sunday, and Lexa was getting ready to pick Gracie up. Clarke was out running errands and she didn’t think she would be back in time to have dinner with them. Lexa understood, but she missed Clarke tremendously.

 

Although she was missing Clarke, it brought a smile to Lexa’s face at the thought of seeing her daughter. She quickly took her seat-belt off after putting her car in park and rushed toward the house.

 

As Lexa was walking up the long brick sidewalk, memories of bringing Gracie here when she was a baby flooded through Lexa’s mind. Lexa wrapping her arms around Costia as she held the newborn close to go see her parents. Lexa looked around noticing how there was no one here, but her. She didn’t have Costia by her side and that familiar ache that she thought she’d filled was suddenly back.

 

Lexa knew it was never going to get easier. As Gracie grows up, and starts asking more questions, Lexa knew it would never be easy to talk about it. To talk about her.

 

Lexa never thought she could be so happy. She had that love and happiness so many people yearned for. Her relationship with Costia wasn’t a walk in the park, but it was the greatest thing that happened to her.

 

Lexa opened her tattoo shop with the help of Costia. Costia helped Lexa do a lot of things in a lot of ways, and Lexa knew she couldn’t thank her enough for it. Costia taught her what it was like to be happy and in love, and Lexa thought she was ready to experience that again.

 

The second she thought that, the door came flying open and an excited two year old jumped on her.

 

“Mommy!” Gracie shouted happily. Lexa immediately smiled and picked the little girl up.

 

Lexa placed a ton of kisses on Gracie’s cheek before reaching for her overnight bag, not missing the stern look she was getting from Charlotte.

 

“Yes?” Lexa asked with a frown. Charlotte just huffed and folded her arms together. Lexa immediately went through all the things she could’ve done to make Charlotte mad. Lexa had been on Charlotte’s bad side a couple times, especially when it came to Costia, and hated it. Lexa had no idea what she could’ve done wrong.

 

“Have you forgotten that I speak to your mother on a weekly basis?” Charlotte squinted her eyes at Lexa, and the brunette unconsciously held her daughter closer. “So, imagine my surprise when she tells me she hasn’t heard from you in months. _Months_ , Lexa. What the hell is up with that?”

  
  
“I’ve been meaning to call her,” Lexa made up an excuse. “I’ve just been really busy.”

  
  
“So, have I,” Charlotte said in a stern voice. “But I still have time to contact her.”

  
  
“I will.”

  
“Don’t deprive Gracie of knowing her other grandmother, the way she knows me.”

  
  
“Using my daughter to get me to cave,” Lexa rolled her eyes. “Smart.”

  
  
“She could use you right now.” Charlotte softened her voice, but didn’t elaborate.

  
  
“What do you mean?” Lexa asked in confusion.

  
  
“Call her, Lexa.” That was all Charlotte said before she handed over Gracie’s stuff and closed the door.

  
  
Lexa stood gaping at the door before Gracie tugged on her hand, ready to go home.

 

* * *

 

 

Lexa waited until Gracie was down for the night. She waited until after dinner and dessert and giving Gracie a bath. She took her time reading Gracie her bedtime story. Lexa was more than nervous and she didn’t have a clue why. Lexa waited until her heart stopped beating so fast.

 

When Gracie was fast asleep, Lexa left the room after placing a kiss to her forehead and whispering how much she loved her. Gracie had fallen asleep before Lexa even finished the book, but Lexa kept reading until the end. She was trying to find anything to prolong the awaited phone call she needed to make.

 

Lexa thought it was going to be easier with the fact that her mother was miles away, but it wasn’t. Lexa felt that dread in her heart she would feel if she was coming face to face with the woman. It had been too long, and Lexa only had herself to blame.

 

Knowing that she couldn’t stall any longer, Lexa made her way to her room and closed the door. She didn’t want to wake Gracie in any way because she knew if she did, she wouldn’t make this phone call, and the way Charlotte kept asking her to call her mother, made her think that something was wrong.

  
  
Lexa sat down on her bed, her thumb hovering over the contact she hadn’t called in so long. Feeling the sudden urge to just hear her voice, Lexa finally tapped on the contact.

 

Lexa had to wait three rings until the line connected. There was music playing in the background and her mother let out a surprise gasp.

 

  
“Hi, mom.” Lexa greeted nervously, not knowing what else to say.

 

  
“Well, as I live and breathe.” Her mother drawled out over the line, her southern accent still strong even after years of being away and it made Lexa cringe. It really had been a while.

 

  
“I know it’s been a while, but I’m just calling to check up on you.”

  
  
“Oh, I’m fine sweetie. No need to check on me.” Her mom said curtly. Lexa knew it had been a long time, but that didn’t mean she’d suddenly forgot everything about her mom. She never could, and she could tell by the sound of her voice, things were definitely not okay.

 

“You’re lying.” Lexa deadpanned, laying back in her bed.

  
  
“It’s nothing...”

  
  
“Mom!” Lexa called annoyed, not liking that she didn’t know what was going on. “Just tell me.”

  
  
“... I lost my job.”

“What? Are you serious?”

 

“I’m barely getting by. I’ve been through countless interviews, but I haven’t had any calls back.” Her mother confessed everything that had been going on.

 

“I had no idea,” Lexa breathed. “How long?”

 

“Just a few weeks.” Her mother answered shyly.

 

“Mom!”

 

“I know! I know.”

 

“You should’ve told me.”

 

“It’s not your job to take care of me. I take care of you because you're my daughter, that’s how this works. You take care of Gracie, because she’s your daughter.”

 

“But you’re my mother and if I would’ve known you were in trouble.”

 

“I’m fine, honey.”

 

“You lost your job. I’m sorry, but that doesn’t sound like you’re fine. I know if I lost my job, I would be totally screwed so stop saying you’re fine.” Lexa said seriously. Talking to her mother over the phone was bringing back a lot of painful memories.

 

Her mother had been there through the worst time of her life, and Lexa couldn’t thank her enough. She hated that her mother wasn’t around anymore, even if she acted like she didn’t. She needed and missed her.

 

“I’ve been so reckless with my money, just spending it on this and that and now look at me,” Her mother sighed. “I can hardly scrape up enough money to pay rent.”

 

“I can try to help.”

 

“I can’t ask you to do that, Lexa.” Lexa knew her mother was shaking her head over the phone.

 

“How much is rent?” Lexa asked.

 

There was a pause on the line before she answered.

 

“Two thousand.”

 

“Jesus, mom!” Lexa whined.

 

“That’s why I told you that I have it covered. Don’t worry about me.”

 

“How much do you need to pay this month?”

 

“Another 800.”

 

“Mom,” Lexa sighed deeply. “I want to help, but I’m paying the full price of Gracie’s daycare and I-“

 

“I’m not asking you to help me, Lexa.”

 

“You're my mother-“

 

“It’s not your job-“

 

“Yeah, I know. You’re the mother and I’m the kid, even though I'm twenty-six years old. I don’t take care of you, you take care of me,” Lexa cut her mom off. “But you’re in trouble, so let me help.”

 

Lexa waited nervously, her heart pounding in her chest at how fragile her mother sounded. Lexa should’ve called sooner. She should’ve listened to Charlotte, the older woman was always right. Lexa should’ve contacted her mother sooner because she was in trouble.

 

“Okay,” Her mother finally said. “And if you ever cut me off like that again, I’m going to come down there and mess up some part of your body.”

 

“I think I can handle that,” Lexa chuckled, knowing her mother wasn’t being serious. “What I can’t handle, is knowing you don’t have a job right now. I know if I lost my job right now, I would be completely screwed. You’re my mom and I miss you and I want to help. So, let me help.”

 

“How much can you spare?”

 

“All of it.” Lexa said confidently.

 

“No,” Her mother immediately said. “You will not.”

 

“You should just come home.” Lexa suggested casually, making her mother laugh.

 

“That’s a good one,” Her mother laughed some more. “There’s more job opportunities out here than home. I’m staying.”

 

It hurt knowing that her mother didn’t even think about saying no to her idea. She missed her mother, and wanted to see her.

 

“Okay,” Lexa said quietly. “I’ll have your money by the end of the month.”

 

“Thank you.” Her mother said reluctantly. Lexa knew she hated asking for money, but she also knew that she needed it. Lexa didn’t know what was going to happen next month, but for right now, she wanted to help.

 

“I love you, mom.” Lexa said, feeling like her mother needed to hear the words. They hadn’t talked in so long, and Lexa wanted her to know that she was here for her.

 

“I love you too, sweetie.” Her mother breathed over the line, her voice thick with emotion.

 

“I feel bad for calling right now. Gracie’s asleep, but I know I would have more time to talk to you uninterrupted if she was asleep.”

 

“That’s okay, honey. That’s motherhood for you.” Her mother gave her a slight chuckle and Lexa hummed in agreement. She didn’t say anything, and neither did her mother. They just stayed on the line, quiet.

 

“I really do miss you.” Lexa said after a few minutes of silence. “I hate that you’re not here.”

 

“We both know we would just fight if I was.”

 

“I’d rather fight with you than have you leave.” Lexa was pouring out all her emotions after not talking to her mother for so long.

 

“That job opportunity was the best thing that happened to me in a long time. I know it took me away from you guys, but it did wonders for me.”

 

“How did you lose your job?” Lexa asked curiously. She didn’t know if she was overstepping, but this was her mother and she wanted to know.

 

“Oh, honey. That’s a story for another day.” Her mother said lightly, but Lexa just shook her head in disbelief.

 

“You can tell me.” Lexa said desperately.

 

“I know I can. Exactly why I’ll tell you a different time. Please, it stresses me out just thinking of it.”

 

“Okay.” Lexa eventually said.

 

“How is the good ol’ Alabama? Is the weather treating you nice?”

 

“It’s something. It’s going to start getting cold soon, which means Thanksgiving and Christmas are coming up. Which means you should come home.” Lexa smirked over the phone.

 

“Trying to guilt trip me?” Her mother asked in amusement.

 

“Something like that.”

 

“I miss you too, in ways you can’t understand. I haven’t seen Gracie since she was a baby and Charlotte and David even longer. I miss you all.”

 

“Charlotte would be thrilled to see you.”

 

“I’m sure. How are things with you? Are you okay? Are you getting by okay? How’s Gracie? Is she talking yet?” Her mother was firing off question after question which made Lexa smile.

 

“Gracie’s talking so much, mom. Even more now that she’s in daycare. She’s learning so many different things and I’m glad I put her in daycare. I’m good, mom. Just taking it day by day.”

 

“You guys are both alive so I take that as a good sign.” Her mother teased.

 

“I wasn’t that bad.”

 

“Waking me up at three in the morning because you couldn’t change Gracie because she pooped everywhere would say otherwise.”

 

“It was all runny and gross and I didn’t know what I was doing. I learned though.”

 

“That, you did baby. I’m so proud of you. Being a mom is a lot of hard work but it’s the greatest gift of all.” Her mother spoke fondly, and Lexa just wished she could see her just for a few minutes.

 

“I’m really starting to see that. I love Gracie with all my heart, mom.” Lexa gushed.

 

“I’m sure she’s the perfect mix of you and Costia.”

 

“She is,” Lexa giggled out. “Her hair is starting to grow more and its curly just like both of ours. She has Costia’s eyes, which I love, but she makes a lot of my facial expressions.”

 

“She sounds beautiful.” Her mother whispered, before Lexa heard voices in the background. “Listen, I have to go Lexa. I love you.”

 

Lexa didn’t even get to say I love you back before the line went dead. Lexa looked her phone with a frown, wondering why her mother was so quick to hang up the phone.

 

She didn’t think too much into it, too happy that she just had a conversation with her mother and it went well. They had butted head so much when Gracie was younger, and Lexa just missed the bickering about how to do things. She just wished her mother was here so she could see for herself that she was okay.

 

Lexa let out a long, deep sigh before walking to her closet and picking out some pajamas. She took a shower and went through her normal nighttime routine before getting into bed.

 

Lexa curled up on her side, facing Costia’s side of the bed. She ran her hands over the sheets a couple times before scooting over and sniffing her pillow. Costia always smelled like coconut and vanilla. Lexa loved it. Her smell hadn’t faded away from the pillows even after all these years. Lexa could smell the traces of it, and it made her smile.

 

Lexa knew there were a million things weighing her down right now, but the fact that her daughter was sleeping soundly in the room next to her, put Lexa at ease the rest of the night.

 

* * *

 

 

As the weekend was nearing, the only thing Lexa wanted to do was see Clarke. They hadn’t seen each other all week with their busy schedules, and with Lexa dropping Gracie off in a couple of hours, Lexa knew she wanted to spend the night with Clarke.

 

She had just finished her last client of the day and was on her way to pick up Gracie from daycare. She was going to take her daughter to get some ice cream since she’d been behaving all week.

 

Before she went inside, she thought this would be the perfect time to call Clarke. Lexa didn’t know why she was so nervous. She talked to Clarke all the time. The blonde just had a way of doing that to her.

 

Lexa listened to the ringing on the phone, before the line connected.

 

“Hey, Lexa!” Clarke greeted happily. “I just was getting ready to text you.”

 

“I’m about to pick Gracie up, so I thought this would be the perfect time to ask,” Lexa smiled at the sound of Clarke’s voice. “Do you think you could hang out ton-“

 

“Yes!” Clarke immediately said, knowing exactly what Lexa was about to ask. It was the only thing getting her through this day. “A hundred times yes.”

 

“Well, that’s good to know.”

 

“I could cook us a chicken casserole.” Clarke sighed dreamily.

 

“That sounds delicious,” Lexa rubbed her stomach. “Well, I let you go, but I’ll see you tonight?”

 

“You certainly will.” Clarke said and Lexa could hear the smile through the phone.

 

“Bye.”

 

“Bye.”

 

* * *

 

 

They decided that hanging out of Clarke’s house was easier since all the ingredients to make food was already there. Lexa dropped Gracie off, trying her hardest to avoid Charlotte’s eyes. There was a lot they needed to sit down and talk about and Lexa knew the few minutes she had to drop Gracie off wasn’t enough time.

 

It went unspoken between them, that they would talk about the heavy stuff later (including where she was going right now) and not in front of Gracie.

 

Lexa stood around the kitchen helplessly sipping away on her glass of wine. Clarke insisted she had everything under control and Lexa believed her because the smells coming from the kitchen were heavenly.

 

Lexa didn’t stray too far though. She had missed Clarke and took every opportunity to kiss her when she could. By the time dinner was done, Lexa’s stomach let out a low growl in approval.

 

“This looks delicious.” Lexa said as she pulled out Clarke’s chair before sitting down.

 

“Thank you.” Clarke said as she cut into it and gave Lexa the first piece.

 

“I actually wanted to talk to you about something.” Lexa said as they both settled into the food.

 

“Oh, yeah?” Clarke cut up her food, before blowing the steam off it. “What’s that?”

 

“Charlotte’s been telling me to call my mother,” Lexa paused for a second before continuing. “So I finally called her.”

 

“How did it go?” Clarke asked in genuine concern.

 

“It went well,” Lexa nodded before frowning. “It was nice hearing from her, but she lost her job.”

 

“Oh no!” Clarke gasped, putting her fork down. “I’m so sorry. This economy sucks these days.”

 

“She’s behind on bills and I offered to pay for the month.”

 

“That was nice of you. Are you going to?”

 

“I think I should. She’s struggling to come up with the money and I know I’m not in a position to just willingly give money away, but she’s my mom.”

 

“That’s understandable. How much are you paying?” Clarke asked curiously, a little guilty that she probably wouldn’t help her mother right now if she needed it.

 

“She needs 800 more, so I’m going to give it to her.” Lexa said confidently.

 

“Lexa, that’s a lot of money. Are you sure?”

 

“No,” Lexa answered honestly. “But I’m going to do it.”

 

“I could-“

 

“No!” Lexa said firmly, making Clarke clamp her mouth shut. “I appreciate you wanting to help, but I can take care of my family.”

 

“I’m not saying you can’t, but if you need the money, keep it and I’ll-“

 

“Clarke, no!” Lexa said again. “I got this.”

 

Clarke sighed deeply, trying to believe Lexa. It was a lot of money her mother needed. A lot of money that could go toward her bills or Gracie. Clarke could give the 800 dollars away without batting an eye. Lexa didn’t look sure of her decision at all, and Clarke just wanted to help.

 

But she let it go. Lexa said she had it under control and Clarke was going to believe her.

 

“Okay, I’m sorry.”

 

“Thank you for offering, but you don’t need to do that.”

 

“It’s sweet you want to take care of her. I wouldn’t give my mother a dime of my money.”

 

Lexa nodded in agreement, not wanting to say anything about Abby right now.

 

“When we’re done eating, we could go take a shower. I know I need one.” Clarke suggested, hiding her smirk behind her glass of wine. “There’s plenty of room and I have a built in bench.”

 

“I wonder what we could do with that.” Lexa tapped her chin, faking her innocence.

 

“I have a few ideas.” Clarke’s smirk widened as they quickly finished up their food.

* * *

 

 

 _“Lexa.”_ Clarke moaned quietly, tilting her head back in complete pleasure as she felt Lexa’s tongue slide through her.

 

Clarke was sitting down on the bench, legs spread wide open with Lexa in between them. The sight made Clarke moan again, and pull Lexa closer to her. The brunette had a death grip on both of her thighs as her tongue flicked through her center. Clarke couldn’t stop the moans as Lexa’s soft tongue brushed against clit and she pulled it into her mouth.

 

Clarke’s jaw dropped as another moan echoed around the shower. Lexa groaned against her and Clarke tried to close her legs around her head. Lexa put a hand against her thigh, keeping her legs wide open and licking through her once more, before pulling away.

 

She left Clarke sitting there, panting before grabbing a hold of her hair. She quickly guided her dick toward Clarke’s open mouth and let out a loud groan when Clarke’s mouth closed around her.

 

It didn’t take long. That was the reason Lexa pulled away from Clarke so quickly. She could feel it building up, and didn’t want to cum all over the shower. She wanted to cum into Clarke’s mouth.

 

The blonde was eagerly sucking her dick, making heavy eye contact that was driving her insane. Lexa focused on the death grip she had on Clarke’s hair, and Clarke’s hot mouth around her before exploding. Clarke had her mouth wide open, and Lexa’s load came flying out.

 

“Sorry,” Lexa panted out once she was done. “I just wanted to cum in your mouth.”

 

“It’s okay.” Clarke got up on shaky legs before pulling Lexa in for a kiss. She fumbled with her breasts for a few seconds before turning around. “I’m sure you can make it up to me.”

 

Clarke spoke as she bent over, and Lexa followed her. Her only focus was on Clarke’s butt that was sticking up in the air. Lexa ran her hands across every inch of skin she could before cupping her butt.

 

“I’m sure I can.” Lexa said, not wanting to take too long. It’d been a while for the both of them and Lexa didn’t waste another second. The second Clarke nodded, Lexa started bottoming out into her.

 

Clarke immediately hissed, but groaned in pleasure once Lexa was all the way inside. The hot water was beating against Lexa’s back as she pulled out and pushed back in.

 

Clarke had both hands resting against the bench as Lexa started a nice, slow pace of pumping in and out of Clarke. Lexa thrusted all the way in and back out. Clarke was enjoying every second of it, and was moaning the whole time.

 

Lexa enjoyed the way Clarke tightened around her whenever she pushed into her. It made her throat dry as she reached around and pinched Clarke’s nipples. The fact that the were both dripping wet from the shower, made it easier for Lexa to move and soon, she started picking up the pace.

 

With both hands placed on either side of Clarke’s waist, Lexa started moving her hips faster.

 

 _“Oh god!”_ Clarke whimpered, her breathing becoming harsh. Lexa was grunting alongside her, focusing on the way her dick was being coated in Clarke’s juices. Lexa knew Clarke was on edge.

 

Lexa blocked out everything and the only thing she was worried about right now, was getting Clarke to tip over the edge. It was the only thing she wanted, and with a few more hard thrusts, she had Clarke cumming all over her dick.

 

“Lexa!” Clarke moaned again, her entire body tightening up. Lexa held her in her arms as she fell apart. She kissed from the base of her neck to her shoulder and once Clarke was done, spun her around to kiss her on the lips.

 

They kissed sloppily for a few minutes, not caring that their tongues were all over the place before Clarke pulled away and laid down on the bench.

 

Clarke motioned for Lexa to get on top of her. Lexa got on top of her the best she could and was planning to slide back inside when Clarke guided her up her body. Lexa fumbled a bit, not knowing what Clarke wanted to do, but it became clear once Lexa was straddling Clarke’s torso.

 

Clarke looked back up to see if it was okay, and Lexa quickly nodded. Lexa guided her dick in between Clarke’s breasts and rested her hands on the wall behind Clarke’s head. Clarke held onto Lexa’s hips after she licked her way up to her balls, sucking both of them in her mouth. Lexa groaned before thrusting forward.

 

The sight of Clarke alone, hands pushing her breasts together and the look of pure pleasure on her face, was enough to make Lexa cum. But she tried to hold on for as long as she could.

 

Lexa thrusted in between Clarke’s breasts, careful not to put all her weight onto the girl. Lexa zoned in on the moans flying out of Clarke’s mouth and her dick that was throbbing in pleasure. This position was doing wonders for Lexa, and knew she wasn’t going to last much longer.

 

After a few more minutes, Lexa’s hips faltered, and she squeezed her eyes shut. Clarke whimpered as Lexa’s hot cum coated her neck and face. Lexa was breathing hard on top of her, her body shaking in pleasure before standing up. She pulled Clarke with her and toward the water to wash off the mess she made.

 

The water was starting to turn cold and they cleaned up the best they could before jumping out of the shower. Lexa walked over to her bag, putting on a pair of boxers and a loose shirt before laying down in bed. She watched Clarke wander around the room, drying off from the shower. The smiles on their faces never left as Clarke climbed into bed and pulled Lexa in for a kiss.

 

“I-“ Clarke stopped talking when her phone went off. She wondered who was calling her so late on a Friday, and rolled her eyes at the caller ID.

 

“She’s been calling me all week.” Clarke grumbled, ignoring the call and turning her phone off.

 

“Abby?” Lexa questioned.

 

“Raven.” Clarke grunted. “She just won’t take a hint that I don’t want to talk to her.”

 

“I’m sorry.”

 

“It’s alright. She did come by the house last week.” Clarke revealed making Lexa frown.

 

“She did?”

 

“Yes, but it wasn’t for long. I don’t care about anything she has to say.”

 

“You weren’t going to marry him.” Lexa said quietly, wrapping her arm around Clarke’s waist.

 

“What do you mean?” Clarke asked slowly.

 

“I’m not on Raven’s side, but you weren’t going to marry him. It may have nothing to do with me. Hell, you could’ve been half way down the aisle, but I know you wouldn’t have married him.”

 

“Lexa-“

 

“She made a mistake.” Lexa murmured.

 

“A year long mistake?” Clarke sneered. “I don’t think so. She keeps claiming how we are best friends. I would never sleep with my best friend's fiancé.”

 

“Clarke-“

 

“I don’t want to talk about Raven-” Clarke said as calmly as possible.

 

“We don’t have to talk at all.” Lexa cut her off, getting ready to get rid of her boxers when Clarke stopped her.

 

“We need to talk about Gracie.” Clarke said hesitantly.

 

“Why Gracie? Is something wrong?” Lexa immediately sat up, wondering what Clarke meant.

 

“I just wanted to talk about something that happened while I was babysitting.”

 

“Oh, okay,” Lexa nodded slowly, and had Clarke’s full attention.

 

“I don’t know how she got into the room, but that last room at the end of the hall-“

 

“She was in there?” Lexa frowned, wondering why her daughter was in there.

 

“I know I saw her in that one picture at your office, but she was everywhere it was hard not to look. I should’ve tried harder to get Gracie out of the room, but she wasn’t listening.”

 

“Why was she in there?” Lexa asked in confusion. “She hardly ever goes in there. She knows about it, but she doesn’t go in it.”

 

“That’s why I wanted to talk to you about it,” Clarke murmured. “And then she became all silent when we left and asked how she could have a family if her mother is in the sky.”

 

“She said that?” Lexa asked, tears already prickling her eyes.

 

“I know she knows, but I think she’s starting to see it. She asked why Jason had two parents and she only had one, and I wasn’t sure how to answer, but I told her not everyone has two parents.”

 

“Oh no.” Lexa whimpered, not knowing about any of this.

 

“I’m sure she’s fine, but I really wanted you to know. I think she’s starting to get more curious about her other mom.”

 

“I told her that she was in the sky and she wasn’t going to come back down for a while.” Lexa explained and Clarke scooted closer to wipe away the tears.

 

“You’re a wonderful mother and I’m sure everything will be okay,” Clarke assured her. “Maybe you should talk to her again. I mean, she’s getting a bit older, maybe she’ll understand more.”

 

“Thank you Clarke,” Lexa nodded. “Was that what you wanted to talk about that night?”

 

“Yes,” Clarke answered. “But I didn’t want to say anything around her. She’s a kid. I get that she was curious.”

 

“I’ll definitely talk to her at some point. I might wait until she’s three, but I just don’t know.”

 

“I think it’s starting to be hard for her to understand. I know Jason could have a lot of influence with it, but maybe the reason Gracie is starting to misbehave is because she doesn’t understand what’s going on.”

 

“You know,” Lexa let out a cheeky smile. “For someone who barely knows how to change a diaper, you are pretty good with this kid stuff.”

 

“I just know if this were me, I would be curious too, and not really sure what to do with myself. I know she misses her mom, and it’s hard on her.”

 

Lexa thought about that for countless nights, how hard this would be on Gracie when she grows up and realized her other mother wasn’t around. Lexa knew, but didn’t think Gracie was starting to be affected by it. She didn’t know why she didn’t think about this sooner. She had a feeling everything Clarke was saying was right.

 

“Okay, we can talk about something less dark now.” Clarke said after a few minutes of silence. “I just really wanted you to know.”

 

“I appreciate it,” Lexa said thankfully. “We could talk about the ways I could get you out of your underwear.”

 

“And I could talk about the ways to get you out of your boxers. It starts with a kiss.”

 

“Maybe a little tongue action?” Lexa said as she crawled closer to Clarke.

 

“Hands start wandering?” Clarke pretended to think about it and Lexa nodded.

 

“My hands slip inside your underwear?”

 

“You’ll find me unbelievable wet and we just started talking about this.”

 

“Let me see.” Lexa begged, but Clarke shook her head.

 

“Kiss me first and then I’ll decide.”  

 

Lexa cupped Clarke’s chin and pulled her in for a soft kiss, breathing in sharply through her nose. Clarke immediately let her tongue slip inside and pulled Lexa on top of her.

 

“Can I feel now?” Lexa asked desperately, jerking her hips into her. Clarke bit down on Lexa’s bottom lip before gesturing to her boxers.

 

“Take off your boxers first and then I’ll decide.”

 

Lexa was quick to remove the offending garment. She quickly pulled her shirt off her body before settling back on top of Clarke. She pulled the blonde in for another kiss, running her hands up and down her thighs. She inched her way up Clarke’s thigh, smirking into the kiss. Clarke shook her head, pulling away from the kiss.

 

“Clarke.” Lexa whined, but stopped once Clarke flipped them over and started kissing her way down her body.

 

Clarke cupped both breasts in her hands, her mouth wrapping around the nipple. Lexa unconsciously jerked her hips up and moaned at how good it felt. Clarke continue to kiss her way down Lexa’s body, being sure to avoid kissing over Costia’s name.

 

It didn’t throw Clarke off like she thought it would. Seeing Costia’s name on Lexa’s body was like seeing a battle wound. Lexa had survived the war that was getting over her wife. She knew Lexa was still struggling to get things back on track, but Lexa had survived nevertheless, and she was ready to start over again. (Clarke hoped she was ready to start over again with her).

 

And with that thought in mind, Clarke settled in between Lexa’s legs. She gulped slightly at being face to face with the thickness that was Lexa’s dick, before tugging it toward her mouth.

 

Clarke peaked up and saw Lexa throw her head back in pleasure. Clarke smiled slightly because she was glad that she could bring that to her. Lexa was resting on her elbows watching Clarke’s every move. Clarke focused on not gagging on Lexa’s dick every time it poked the back of her throat.

 

Clarke was beyond turned on. She was on her knees, hovering over Lexa as she sucked her off. Clarke could feel her underwear getting soaked by the minute.

 

Lexa couldn’t keep still, whether that was rocking her hips up lazily into Clarke’s mouth, or wrapping a hand around Clarke’s hair. Lexa was constantly moving. She couldn’t keep still with Clarke between her legs. It was driving her crazy and as much as Lexa was enjoying Clarke’s mouth, that wasn’t how she wanted to get off.

 

“Clarke, please,” Lexa whimpered helplessly. “Let me bury my dick in you.”

 

Clarke let go of Lexa’s dick, eyes darkened in desire and let out a moan at the mere thought of Lexa being trapped inside of her. Clarke was on her back in a flash, legs spread open and waiting for Lexa.

 

Lexa kissed her way up Clarke’s body, not missing a single inch of skin. She ran her hands across Clarke’s milky white skin before stroking her dick a few times.

 

Lexa’s chest was heaving as was Clarke’s as Lexa zoned in on Clarke’s swollen clit. Not being able to control herself, Lexa bent down and took Clarke’s clit in her mouth, wrapping her lips around it.

 

Clarke let out a loud, long moan not expecting the action. Lexa brushed her tongue against Clarke’s clit, feeling it throb against her before pulling herself back on her knees. Lexa didn’t give Clarke time to prepare before she softly slid inside of her.

 

Lexa threw one of Clarke’s legs over her shoulder so she could slide in further. They both groaned once Lexa was all the way in, and Lexa took a moment to herself. She clenched her jaw tight, wondering how she had such a beautiful woman underneath her. One that was begging her to move.

 

Lexa shook her head to clear her thoughts before pulling out. Clarke whimpered at the loss, but it turned into a strangled moan when Lexa pushed back into her. Lexa took her time pumping into her, loving how Clarke clenched around her.

 

Lexa was able to thrust in deep with the position that she was in, she could already feel herself approaching the edge. Clarke looked like she wasn’t that far behind, and Lexa knew exactly how to push her.

 

Lexa quickly licked two fingers before rubbing them roughly over Clarke’s clit. The blonde’s eyes flew open as she let out a grunt.

 

“Lexa!” Clarke moaned harshly, but Lexa wasn’t listening to her. She was too focused on how deep her dick was inside of Clarke, and how Clarke’s clit was throbbing in pleasure under her fingertips.

 

Lexa could tell Clarke was close as she started pumping her hips harder. Lexa placed a hand against the back of Clarke’s thighs and pushed down, making her slide in even further. Clarke was moaning in pleasure and a wet smacking noise was starting to sound around the room.

 

Lexa focused on that noise as it became louder and louder until Clarke fell apart beneath her. Lexa watched in awe as Clarke’s body jerked through her orgasm. Lexa gave one more thrust before she tried to pull out.

 

“Wait!” Clarke stopped her. Lexa looked at her desperately, hoping the blonde wasn’t teasing her before shaking her head.

 

“Clarke, I can’t and unless you want me to cum inside-“

 

“I do.” Clarke quickly responded. Lexa looked at her incredulously, trying to hold off her orgasm.

 

“Clarke, are you sure?” Lexa’s chest heaved up and down, moaning at the way Clarke was still clenching around her.

 

“I’m on the pill, so do it.” Clarke moaned. Lexa was still looking at her skeptically, but quickly focused on the fact that she was getting ready to cum.

 

 _“Clarke!”_ Lexa moaned desperately as she pumped into Clarke roughly, her hips moving on their own accord before stopping abruptly. Lexa didn’t question it this time, she had no time. Her cum came rushing out of her and inside of Clarke. The blonde let out a small whimper at being filled up before pulling Lexa in for a kiss.

 

“That was so hot.” Clarke mumbled out between kisses. Lexa couldn’t even form words to respond. It’d been so long since she’d came inside someone, Lexa was at a loss of what to do. She couldn’t believe she just did that.

 

Lexa pulled out Clarke and looked down at the mess she made. All Lexa could do was stare at the way her cum was making its way down Clarke’s thigh. She quickly got up, making her way to the bathroom to get some tissue.

 

“I haven’t done that in a while.”

 

“I’m sorry if you didn’t-“ Clarke started to apologize.

 

“I did.” Lexa quickly assured her, climbing back into bed. Clarke took her time wiping up the mess before throwing the tissue away. She climbed back into bed with Lexa and cuddled into her side. Clarke smiled at the way Lexa’s hands immediately cupped her breasts.

 

They laid there quietly, still not being able to get over the fact that Lexa came inside Clarke.

 

It wasn’t long before their body heat wasn’t enough to keep them warm. Lexa’s teeth were shattering together and they quickly went to put their clothes back on.

 

Once they did, they cuddled back up to each other and Lexa couldn’t help but notice the distant look on Clarke’s face.

 

“Is everything okay?” Lexa asked quietly, a little insecure about what happened.

 

“Everything is fine.” Clarke nodded.

 

“Is this about- I mean did it not- was it-“ Clarke looked at Lexa in confusion before she pieced together what Lexa was trying to say.

 

“No, Lexa,” Clarke shook her head seriously. “I wouldn’t have asked if I wasn’t prepared and if I didn’t want it. I’m on the pill.”

 

“Okay,” Lexa nodded softly. “So, what’s bugging you?”

 

Clarke took a moment, not knowing how to answer that question. She was in her ginormous house, with a woman she was actively sleeping with after finding out her fiancé was cheating on her for over a year. Clarke had no idea how to voice how she was feeling.

 

“I feel like a failure,” Clarke murmured, wringing her hands together. “I wasted a lot of time on something I thought was making me happy. I thought _I_ was happy, but I wasn’t and I didn’t realize it until I met you.”

 

Clarke looked up at Lexa, tears welling up in her eyes. Lexa immediately scooted closer to her, but didn’t say anything. She let Clarke have her moment.

 

“And now I’m in this huge house alone and I hate it.” Clarke sobbed out. “I don’t want you to think I’m weak or that I can’t stand on my own two feet because I can.”

 

“I don’t think that Clarke.” Lexa instantly said, but Clarke just chuckled.

 

“I’m going to ask you something I never thought I would and I don’t want you to be offended by that.”

 

Lexa gave her a look that said continue and Clarke took a deep breath.

 

“Do you think you and Gracie would like to come over next Sunday? I could cook dinner and she could see the house for the first time.” Clarke didn’t look at Lexa while she asked the question. She didn’t know why she couldn’t. She was afraid of putting herself out there like this. Lexa had every right to say no because they weren’t together.

 

“You want Gracie to see the house?” Lexa asked with a small smile.

 

“I do.” Clarke nodded firmly, letting out a little giggle. “I think it would be cool. The house isn’t childproof, but that could easily change.”

 

Lexa didn’t say anything as she softly grabbed Clarke’s head and turned it. She placed a long, hot kiss against her lips before nodding.

 

“I would love that.” Lexa nodded again, making Clarke smile.

 

“Really?”

 

“Of course.” Lexa chuckled. “I’m sure Gracie would love to come over and see the place.”

 

“She might have to bring some toys from home. I don’t have any here.” Clarke said sheepishly.

 

“That’s alright,” Lexa said, climbing on top of Clarke. “How about we seal this deal with me going down on you?”

 

“Lexa!” Clarke said shyly, but a huge smile coated her face. “You’re so much better than Finn. You’re literally volunteering to go down on me.”

 

“I can smell you Clarke and it’s driving me wild. I need to taste it,” Lexa said as she removed Clarke’s clothes one by one. “And besides, Finn is a wimp for not going down on you. If I had my way, I’d eat you out every night. The fact that Finn never wanted to just proves he wasn’t right for you. We all know how much you love being eaten.”

 

“You act like you’re actually going to eat me.” Clarke giggled, but opened her legs for Lexa. The brunette settled between them, looking up at Clarke fondly.

 

“I might as well. Your pussy is so good, it makes me want to eat the rest of you.”

 

“Lexa!” Clarke giggled sheepishly.

 

“I’m just saying, baby.” Lexa stopped talking for a minute to spread Clarke’s pussy and admiring how wet it was. “I just don’t understand how something can be so _good_.”

 

“You’re such a sweet talker, Lexa Woods.” Clarke sighed, relaxing back in the bed and preparing for Lexa.

 

“And I’m getting ready to eat your soul out, Clarke Griffin.”

 

Clarke couldn’t stop the smile from spreading across her face. She was in her pitch black room with Lexa between her legs. Clarke could feel Lexa’s breath tickling her center and couldn’t wait to feel Lexa’s mouth on her. Her heart was thumping in excitement and Lexa was right, there was nothing quite better than someone who knew their way around a woman’s genitals.

 

Clarke laid back against the bed, her hand already gripping on Lexa’s hair and the other against the bed sheets. Clarke smiled again because she was more than ready for it.


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for your patience. I hope you all enjoy this chapter!

 

* * *

 

Getting up earlier than 7:30 on a Monday was never easy for Lexa. Usually her busiest time of the day was around lunch and the evenings, for those spontaneous business people who wanted to spice up their life and get a tattoo.

 

Lexa could usually sleep in with Gracie while her employees and staff take care of opening up. Lexa missed those Monday mornings where she could lay in with Gracie, and not have a care in the world. They would eat breakfast and watch cartoons in bed.

 

Lexa would get in all her morning cuddles before they eventually had to get up. This was when she was still taking Gracie to work with her and would trade her off to any available employee. Lexa realized she couldn’t keep taking Gracie to the shop as she got older, and loved that she was going to daycare now.

 

But, Lexa hated having to get up at a certain time to drop Gracie off. She couldn’t waste away her whole morning anymore, especially with a kid as energetic as Gracie. Gracie was all over the house after they finished watching their cartoons together.

 

Getting Gracie up earlier wasn’t a problem, but it was definitely a problem for Lexa. She wasn’t a morning person and when Gracie first got home from the hospital, Lexa took the night shifts while Costia took the early mornings and it had been that way until she died.

 

Lexa was absolutely struggling getting out of bed this morning. She could already hear Gracie calling for her, and with as much strength as she could, she got up. She didn’t know how she made it all the way to Gracie’s room, even though it was only two feet away.

 

Gracie was sitting up in bed, her hair going every direction, and reaching for her. Lexa suddenly had a burst of energy at seeing the smile on Gracie’s face, and quickly made her way over to her.

 

“I see Jason today?” That was the first question Gracie asked her, and Lexa let out a chuckle.

 

“What am I? The gum stuck to the bottom of your shoes?” Lexa asked as she lifted Gracie out of bed and placed kisses all over her face.

 

“No!” Gracie giggled. “You’re my mommy!”

 

“That I am,” Lexa hummed, a bright smile on her face. “Let’s go get some food.”

 

Gracie quickly agreed and they made their way downstairs. Lexa knew she was racing against the clock as she put Gracie in her high-chair.

 

Lexa quickly whipped up some eggs and bacon for Gracie as she rushed around to get all her stuff. When Gracie was done eating, they both raced upstairs to get dressed.

 

Lexa combed Gracie’s hair, and braided it back into a single braid. She put a few Barbie hair clips in her hair before getting her dressed for the day.

 

“Look at my sweet girl.” Lexa gushed as she looked over Gracie with her braided hair, and a light blue dress on.

 

“Do I look pretty?” Gracie asked with a small smile.

 

“The prettiest.” Lexa confirmed with a kiss on her cheek.

 

“Now, come on,” Lexa grabbed Gracie’s backpack she insisted on having since she was a big girl now and led them down the stairs. “We can’t be late for school.”

 

As Lexa gathered Gracie’s stuff, Gracie slipped on her shoes. They were barely on, and on the wrong feet, but Lexa still smiled at the effort.

 

“That’s not quite right, baby.” Lexa muttered as she switched her shoes around and Gracie slid into them. “Ready?”

 

Gracie nodded enthusiastically and hopped up and down next to the door.

 

“I’ll even let you open it this time, because mommy’s hands are full!” Lexa nodded towards the door, and Gracie let out a squeal of excitement. Lexa never let her open the door unless she was with her or one of her friends. They lived in a safe neighborhood, but Lexa never wanted to take her chances.

 

She figured it wouldn’t hurt this one time, because she couldn’t even reach for the door without something falling out of her hands. Lexa waited until the door squeaked open and was about to walk out, when a voice stopped her.

 

“Well, look at you!” The voice exclaimed. “Lookin’ just like your mama!”

 

Lexa almost dropped everything that was in her hands when she looked up. Her heart dropped as she looked into those familiar blue eyes. Instead of them belonging to her favorite blonde, they belonged to a tall brunette. One Lexa never thought she would see anytime soon.

 

Gracie clung to Lexa’s shirt, even though Lexa assured her it wasn’t a stranger. Gracie wouldn’t move from her spot and Lexa was still gaping at the woman in front of her.

 

She looked good for her age. A few wrinkles here and there, and Lexa wouldn’t mention a thing, for the sake of her well-being, about the grey hairs coating the edges of her hairline. She was in casual clothes, probably from spending the night on a plane.

 

Lexa raised her eyebrows and her mom chuckled.

 

“Well, don’t just stand there.” She said, her southern accent had never left despite being in California for years. Lexa finally drop her stuff and pulled her in for a tight hug.

 

“I missed you.” Lexa whispered into her hair, breathing it in and closing her eyes. Even after spending years in a different state, her mom still smelled like home.

 

“I missed you too, darling.” Her mom hugged her tight, before letting her go. “And this one too!”

 

“Gracie,” Lexa called, picking her daughter up. “This is your grandmother.”

 

Gracie laughed like it was the funniest joke Lexa had ever told, before stopping.

 

“That’s not Char.” Gracie said through a fit of giggles, managing to make Lexa chuckle a bit.

 

“No, this is your other grandmother. My mommy,” Lexa explained softly. “This is your grandmother, Lauren.”

 

“You can even call me Lori for short.” Lauren offered with a huge smile, but Gracie just buried her face in Lexa’s neck.

 

“She’s a bit shy when it comes to new faces.” Lexa mumbled over Gracie’s head.

 

“I’m not a new face. I was around when she was a baby.” Lauren waved it off. “But that’s alright.”

 

Lexa stayed quiet for a second, a million thoughts coursing through her. She had no idea her mother was going to be here. She had no idea she was going to show up at her front door, and if she did, she would’ve prepared for her visit.

 

Lexa could tell by the shift in her mom’s eyes, and how her shoulders were just a little too low, that this trip wasn’t planned. She only had one big suitcase with her, and Lexa couldn’t help but fear something was wrong.

 

“Mom, I hate to do this, but I need to get her to daycare.” Lexa said, putting Gracie down, who immediately reached for her again and picked up all the bags she needed for the day. “I also need to head into work and the place is a mess.”

 

“It’s fine, sweetie.” Her mother shrugged it off, but Lexa shook her head.

 

“I just wish you would’ve called me before you decided to get on a plane and fly all the way over here,” Lexa said annoyed, gesturing for both of her girls to follow her to her car. “I would’ve made sure everything was cleaned and you had a room. You can’t just show up like this!”

 

“Weren’t you the one who told me to move back home? I’m here and all of a sudden, it’s a problem.” Lauren walked down the sidewalk with Gracie.

 

“That’s not what I’m saying,” Lexa said, throwing everything into the back seat before picking Gracie up and buckling her into her car seat. “I just wish you would’ve _called_.”

 

Lexa started the car, but didn’t get in. She leaned against it, making sure Gracie was okay before locking eyes with the woman who raised her.

 

“I got evicted.” Lauren announced, eyes casted down. Lexa’s face immediately changed as she leaned off the car.

 

“What?” Lexa questioned.

 

“They kicked me out because I’m a couple months behind,” Lauren explained, walking up to Lexa. “There was no point in me staying in LA. I didn’t have the money and you’re my only family. You and Gracie.”

 

“Mom, I didn’t know-“

 

“That’s because I was too embarrassed to tell you,” Lauren spoke over her. “So, I just decided to get on the plane and stop thinking so much about it. I haven’t been here in a while. Place looks nice.”

 

“Well, obviously you can stay with me,” Lexa nodded. “I don’t mean to rush, but I need to get her to school. We can talk at dinner?”

 

“Of course!” Lauren smiled. “Go. Be an adult. Make your mama proud.”

 

Lauren brought her in for a tight hug and placed a kiss on her cheek.

 

“You look good, my baby.” Lauren whispered against her cheek.

 

“Mom.” Lexa frowned, trying to get her off.

 

“I missed my baby!” Lauren pulled Lexa even closer to her, which was physically impossible. Her mom was crushing her lungs and Lexa felt relieved when she finally let her go. “Go on. Be a mother!”

 

“I will.” Lexa mumbled, still trying to get air into her lungs as she got into the car. She felt bad that the first time they were seeing each other, was rushed, but Lexa had a lot to do today.

 

It didn’t hit her until she was explaining to Gracie how much she was going to love her other grandmother, and how Lauren was around for a little bit when she was a baby. It didn’t hit Lexa until she got into her car after dropping Gracie off that her mother was actually here. Lexa had no idea if this was good or bad, and had no idea what was going to come of this trip.

 

* * *

 

 

“Lauren’s back!” Lexa couldn’t keep this secret in. She told as soon as she saw Anya in the back room.

 

It wasn’t like it was a bad secret, but her mother had been adamant on not coming back, and now she was just _here_.

 

“What?” Anya almost dropped her ink pen and quickly put it down.

 

“I’m glad you weren’t working on a client when I told you.” Lexa joked, but Anya looked at her seriously.

 

“Lauren Woods is here?” Anya asked with wide eyes. “Like in Alabama?”

  
  
“I saw her with my own two eyes!” Lexa giggled, making Anya roll her eyes.

  
  
“I never thought I’d lived to see the day.” Anya said, and nothing about her statement was supposed to be funny. She was being completely serious.

  
  
“I know me neither,” Lexa said, setting up for her next customer. “She wants to have dinner tonight. Gracie wasn’t too thrilled, but that’s just because she hasn’t seen her in a while.”

  
  
“Do you need me to be there?” Anya asked gently.

  
  
“I might,” Lexa nodded. “You know my mom doesn’t have a filter. It would be nice to have back up.”

  
  
“I just want to be there when you tell her you’re seeing someone.”

  
  
“Oh god,” Lexa groaned, thinking about the possibilities. “She’s going to ask me a whole bunch of questions.”

  
“Maybe hold off on Clarke?” Anya offered, with a slight cringe, knowing how Lauren could get sometimes.  

  
  
“That’s a good idea.” Lexa hummed before Lincoln came in and told Lexa that her next customer was here.

  
  
“I’ll see you tonight?” Lexa asked and Anya nodded.

  
  
“See ya tonight.”

 

* * *

 

 

The thumping of Lexa’s heart didn’t stop until after picking Gracie up. The little girl got a sticker for being on her best behavior, so Lexa decided to take her to get some frozen yogurt.

 

Lexa wouldn’t say she was prolonging seeing her mother, but she definitely wasn’t rushing it. Lexa took her time helping Gracie put whatever toppings she wanted on her yogurt before grabbing one herself.

 

They decided to sit down at a table closest to the door and Gracie didn’t waste any time digging in.

 

“So, how was daycare today?” Lexa asked and Gracie immediately smiled.

 

“We readed books and went outside and played with toys and-“

 

Lexa watched with a happy smile on her face as her daughter listed all the things she’d did today. It sounded like a very productive day and the fact that Gracie behaved the entire day, made Lexa proud.

 

“Are we going to see Lori?” Gracie asked, scrunching her nose up just like she did when she was unsure about something.

 

“Yeah, she’s at home.” Lexa answered as she ate her frozen yogurt.

 

“She’s your Mommy?” Gracie questioned further. The serious look on her face, almost made Lexa laugh, but because Gracie looked so serious, Lexa could only think about how Gracie had no idea who this woman was.

 

“She is. She raised me just like I’m raising you.” Lexa said gently.

 

“I have two mommies!” Gracie exclaimed happily, eating a big chunk of her yogurt. Lexa smiled sadly for a second before straightening up.

 

“You do! And we love you very much.”

 

“I see her? I want to see her just like Jason sees his daddy.”

 

“Honey, we talked about this-“

 

“I want to see her.” Gracie frowned sadly and she looked seconds from bursting into tears.

 

Lexa tried to keep it together as much as possible. Clarke was right. Gracie was starting to get more curious about her other mother and Lexa had no idea what to do.

 

“I want you to know something,” Lexa said softly, reaching across the table to stroke Gracie’s cheeks. “Do you want to know?”

 

“Yes.” Gracie muttered sadly.

 

“Mama will always be with you, in your heart. I know you have a lot of questions and I haven’t been the best at answering them. I know you are getting older and I’m sorry, sweetie. But mama can’t see you right now.”

 

That clearly wasn’t the right thing to say, because Gracie immediately burst into tears. It was the loudest Lexa had ever heard Gracie cry and everyone in the shop was looking at her.

 

Lexa immediately sprang into action. She scooped Gracie up and picked up their yogurt before rushing out of the place.

 

Gracie was clutching tight to Lexa and Lexa had no idea what to do. Lexa was fast walking to her car with Gracie crying in her ear. It broke Lexa’s heart and she was starting to panic.

 

“Hey, I have an idea.” Lexa tried to get Gracie’s attention, but the little girl just shook her head. “Why don’t we call Clarke?”

 

Gracie hiccuped before she lifted her head off Lexa’s shoulder. The sight before her broke Lexa’s heart and she vowed she would do anything to put a smile on her face.

 

“Rwally?” Gracie mumbled.

 

“I’ll call her right now.” Lexa said, putting the yogurt on top of her car and fumbling to get her phone out.

 

Lexa prayed Clarke wasn’t in a meeting or doing something equally as important. Gracie looked like she was looking forward to speaking with Clarke. Lexa knew she was giving the blonde absolutely no warning, but she was out of ideas.

 

Lexa waited three rings before the blonde picked up.

 

“Lexa!” Clarke exclaimed over the line. “What a pleasant surprise.”

 

“Gracie is upset and wants to speak to you.” Lexa rushed out, cringing that she hadn’t even said hello. The line went dead for a second before Clarke spoke again.

 

“Put her on.”

 

Lexa had no idea what Clarke was saying to Gracie, but as each second went on, the smile on her daughter’s face grew. By the end of the conversation, Gracie was laughing like she was never crying in the first place.

 

“Otay, bye.” Gracie said before carefully handing the phone back to Lexa.

 

Clarke was still laughing when Lexa put the phone to her ear and her heart swooned.

 

“What did you say to her?” Lexa asked in awe.

 

“That’s between me and her, babe.” Clarke said lightly and just the sound of Clarke’s voice, put a smile on Lexa’s face.

 

“I’ll let it slide for now. Thank you really. She was really upset.”

 

“I could tell,” Clarke said before speaking to someone that wasn’t her. “Listen, Lexa, I have to go. But say bye again to Gracie for me.”

 

“Okay, I will.” Lexa said and the line went dead shortly after that. Lexa didn’t have any time to tell Clarke her mother was back in town, but figured she would have time later.

 

Lexa shoved her phone back in her pocket before looking down at Gracie.

 

“Are you better now?” Lexa asked skeptically, but Gracie was just wearing a knowing smile before she nodded.

 

“Home!” Gracie said and Lexa agreed. Lexa was still looking at Gracie cautiously. Who wouldn’t after the outburst she just had? Lexa really needed to sit down and figure out how to tell Gracie that she would never see her mama again.

 

* * *

 

 

“You took her for frozen yogurt before dinner?!” Lauren screeched once Lexa had told her mom where they’d been. Gracie was in a completely better mood and was playing with her toys in the next room while Lauren slaved away at the stove.

 

“She was on her best behavior today. Even got a sticker for it. Of course I did!” Lexa defended herself and got a bottle of water out of the fridge.

 

“You eat the frozen yogurt after the dinner, Lexa not before it!” Lauren threw her hands up and Lexa shook her head in disbelief.

 

“She had a bit of a rough time afterwards. She asked me about Costia.”

 

Lauren immediately stopped her bickering, letting out a long sigh and placing a hand on Lexa’s shoulder.

 

“What did you say?”

 

“I told her that Costia couldn’t see her right now and she had a fit.”

 

“I’d have a fit too if you told me I couldn’t see one of my parents. What is wrong with you?” Lauren swatted Lexa in the arm. “And don’t think I’m not over the whole frozen yogurt thing.”

 

“Mom, it was just a little treat! Get over it!” Lexa huffed, walking over to her dinner table and sorting through the pile of bills she needed to pay.

 

Lauren eventually let it go and went back to cooking. She didn’t overdo it. She wanted to cook some of Gracie’s favorite dishes in hopes to win her over. Lexa went on about how she practically lived off macaroni and cheese, and Lauren being the wonderful mother she was, told them they needed protein to go along with it, so she was making her famous chicken piccata to go with it.

 

“Anya should be over soon.” Lexa said, opening envelope after envelope.

 

It wasn’t long before Gracie found her way into the kitchen, walking over to her mother and reaching for her. Lexa placed her on her lap before kissing her cheek.

 

“Lori stay the night?” Gracie asked, looking up at the older woman. Lexa looked up at her mother and gestured for her to answer.

 

“If that’s okay with you.” Lauren asked, suddenly nervous. She wanted her granddaughter to like her.

 

“Char spend the night too?” Gracie asked her mother and this time Lexa answered.

 

“No, not this time, but grandma Lori will be spending a couple nights with us. She’s going to help me take care of you, okay?”

 

“Otay.” Gracie answered, nodding her head.

 

“She is just too cute.” Lauren placed a hand over her heart. “Can I?”

 

Lexa stood up and handed Gracie over to her mother. Gracie looked like she was getting ready to cry, but quickly got over it.

 

Gracie wrapped her arms around Lauren and Lexa smiled at the sight. She didn’t think she would ever see her mom back in her kitchen again. They’d just talked last week and Lexa still couldn’t believe she was here.

 

“Tell mommy to get over here and we can have a group hug.”

 

Gracie squealed excitedly and Lexa could never turn her daughter down. She quickly rushed over to her two girls, pulling them both in for hugs before the doorbell rang.

 

“I should go get that. It’s probably Anya.” Lexa said, squeezing her mom’s shoulder before leaving the room.

 

Gracie ran across the hall when she heard Anya’s voice. The taller girl opened her arms wide as Gracie jumped into them.

 

“There she is.” Anya placed a kiss on Gracie’s cheek and the little girl giggled.

 

“Dinner’s done!” Lauren called as Anya closed the door behind her.

 

“I didn’t want to show up empty handed.” Anya said as she handed Lexa a bottle of wine. Lexa took it appreciatively before they all made their way back into the kitchen.  

 

“Oh, it has been too long!” Lauren declared, dropping the dish towel and rushing over to Anya. “Look at you. Both of you. Looking so beautiful!” 

  
  
“Mom!” Lexa called from behind her.

  
  
“Oh, what?” Lauren chuckled. “I’m just saying.”

  
  
Lexa was setting the table, forcing down the pain in her heart at setting a plate in Costia’s spot, but not for Costia. Lexa looked at her daughter who was patiently waiting for her dinner, and smiled.

  
  
“Mama loves you.” Lexa whispered as she put a plastic bib on Gracie.

  
  
“I wuv you.” Gracie said back and Lexa didn’t think anything would beat those three little words coming from her pride and joy. From her daughter.

  
  
“Ready to eat?” Lexa laughed at how quick Gracie was to nod. “Let’s get my baby some food. Let’s eat!”

  
  
Lauren and Anya made their way to the table. They both looked at the extra plate Lexa had set and looked at each other.

  
  
“I can just sit on the counter or something.” Anya suggested, but Lexa shook her head.

  
  
“It’s alright guys. We’re coming up on three years. Please, one of you just sit in her seat.”

  
  
Lauren and Anya looked at each other, silently agreeing that Lauren would sit in the chair while Anya sat between them.

  
  
“Dinner looks wonderful.” Anya commented, looking down at the chicken piccata and macaroni salad.

 

Lexa cut up everything for Gracie and fed her, her chicken and macaroni. The dinner table was quiet for a while, all Lexa could hear was the scrap of forks against the plates.

  
  
She tried not to give into her mom’s questioning gaze, but she couldn’t help it.

“How’s life treating you, Anya?” Lauren asked curiously. “Find anyone interesting?”

 

The way Anya’s eyes widened made Lexa believe that perhaps, maybe Anya did find someone interesting. She made a mental note to ask her about it later, but otherwise, she just sat back and fed her daughter.

 

“Uhm, I mean… not really.” Anya stumbled upon her words, something she didn’t normally do. It was silent for a while, Lexa not really knowing what to say. Had she been so wrapped up in her own problems that she didn’t realize that her best friend was into someone?

 

“No, I haven’t.” Anya settled on saying. Lauren flicked her eyes between Anya and Lexa, not meaning to make Anya uncomfortable. “What about you?”

 

“Oh, please,” Lauren waved off, laughing as if it was the most ridiculous thing she’d ever heard. “I’m not seeing anyone.”

 

“I guess we all aren’t seeing anyone.” Lexa said, knowing that something was up between the two of them. They were all lying to each other at this point.

 

Lexa didn’t miss the questioning gazes. Anya minded her business and ate her food, as Lauren stared her daughter down.

 

“I know you have questions.” Lexa started quietly, focusing on feeding her daughter. “As do I.”

  
  
“Well, let’s hear them. I have no place to be.” Lauren said with a bright smile and Lexa tried not to roll her eyes.

“How long are you going to be here?”

  
  
“I won’t suffocate you like last time, don’t worry.”

  
  
“Mom.” Lexa called seriously. She needed to know how long her mother was planning to stay in town.

 

“Just a couple weeks. Maybe stick around for Gracie’s birthday.”

  
  
“Her birthday is in a couple months.” Lexa pointed out, gathering some more macaroni for Gracie who greedily accepted them.

  
  
“I guess I’m sticking around for a while then, but you won’t even know I’m here.”

  
  
“Mom.” Lexa groaned in annoyance. “You and I both know that’s not true.”

  
  
“Well, if you need help, I’m going to help.” Lauren said as if they were discussing something as simple as the weather, but they weren’t. Her mother had a habit of just taking over things and Lexa hated it. She felt like a prisoner in her own home. She knew her mother meant no harm, but she always came off too strong and didn’t want Gracie pre-exposed to that.

  
  
Also, the fact that Clarke was somewhat in the picture now. She had no idea how she would even begin to explain that to her.

  
  
“You act as if I’m going to dictate your every move. You’re a grown woman, with her own child. I don’t have much dictatorship.”

  
  
“That’s exactly what you said last time!” Lexa excused with wide eyes. “You got upset that I took her to get frozen yogurt!”

  
“That’s because you had no idea what you were doing,” Lauren said bluntly. “Wild animals coming from nowhere could’ve raised Gracie better than you were and everyone knows you get the frozen yogurt _after_ dinner!”

  
  
“Lauren.” Anya called softly, shaking her head subtly.

  
  
“The point I’m trying to make is,” Lauren emphasized. “You have improved a lot. I’m happy for you and Gracie. You both seem happy and I don’t want to impose on that. If you don’t want to me stay here anymore, just say the word. I’ll go stay at one of them cheap motels because that’s all I can afford.”

  
  
“Don’t be so dramatic.” Lexa said, focusing on feeding her daughter, but looking at her mom. “You can stay here. I want you to. I just need you to let me raise Gracie the way I want to.”

  
  
Lauren looked like she wanted to object, but Lexa looked at her sternly.

  
  
“Fine.” Lauren eventually agreed.

 

“Dinner is lovely, Lauren.” Anya said, hoping to relieve some of the tension in the room.

 

“Why thank you, darling.” Lauren beamed and they all finished eating dinner without any arguments.

 

* * *

 

 

The feeling of her lungs caving in, was what woke up Lexa the next morning. She knew all too well who was on top of her and pretended to still be asleep.

 

“Mom!” Gracie called out clearly, but Lexa still faked being asleep.

 

“Mom, wak op!” Gracie poked Lexa in the ribs. Lexa knew what was coming next and tried to keep a straight face.

 

Lexa couldn’t help but crack a smile as she felt little hands tickling at her sides. Her daughter knew her all too well.

 

“Lori make brekfawst!” Gracie tickled her mother some more, seeing the smile on her face. “Wak op!”

 

“Just five more minutes.” Lexa faked a groan and tried to roll over. She wrapped her arms around her daughter in the process and started tickling her.

 

“No!” Gracie squealed as Lexa attacked her sides. “No!”

 

Those were the only words Gracie could get out through her laughter. Lexa smiled down happily at her daughter, placing a kiss on her cheek before finally stopping her assault.

 

“Mommy was sleeping.” Lexa whispered into her cheek.

 

“Wak op tiwme.” Gracie said seriously as she pointed to the door. Lexa chuckled again before finally getting out of bed. She brushed her teeth, before brushing Gracie’s and the two went downstairs to Lauren cooking in the kitchen.

 

“Oatmeal, biscuits, eggs and bacon at your service!” Lauren proudly exclaimed as she turned around with a whisk in her hand.

 

“Lori!” Gracie said, but didn’t make any move to go and greet her. She stayed by Lexa’s side until Lexa picked her up.

 

“Well, good morning to you.” Lauren said with her hands on her hips. “Do I get a hug?”

 

Gracie looked at Lexa before looking back at Lauren and nodded. “Yes.”

 

Gracie wrapped her little arms around Lauren’s legs before running back to her mother and reaching her arms up. Lexa easily scooped her up and they both sat down at the table and waited for breakfast. Lexa was making silly faces at Gracie in which she tried to copy.

 

“Cwarke.” Gracie pointed to the seat and Lexa’s eyes widened. Gracie thought her mom didn’t hear her so she repeated herself. “Cwarke.”

 

“No, Gracie.” Lexa tried to say quickly, but Lauren heard it. It didn’t help that Gracie kept repeating her name.

 

“Cwarke!” Gracie said seriously as she pointed to the empty seat. Lauren had a knowing smile on her face and raised her eyebrows.

 

“Who is Cwarke?” Lauren tried to repeat the name Gracie said and Lexa sighed.

 

She got up, playfully glaring at her daughter for giving her away and moved to the fridge.

 

“I don’t know who that is. Must be an imaginary friend or something.”

 

“Oh, I’m sure.” Lauren smiled evilly as Lexa poured some milk in Gracie’s sippy cup. Lexa kept her back to her mother, not knowing what to do. She didn’t know how to bring the conversation up when it came to Clarke. Mostly because she didn’t know what they were.

 

“So, who is she?” Lauren said as she started piling food onto the plates.

 

Lexa’s heart was beating out of her chest. She had no idea what to say. She felt like a teenager again. Getting caught messing around with girls.

 

“Just a friend.” Lexa said lightly.

 

“Would Gracie say that if I asked her?”

 

“Gracie is two years old. She doesn’t know what’s going on.”

 

“She must be around a lot, if Gracie is asking for her.”

 

Lexa was quiet when Lauren said that. Lauren wasn’t wrong and Lexa looked at her mother guiltily.

 

“Oh, honey.” Lauren pulled her daughter in for a hug.

 

“I don’t know what we are, but I like her and so does Gracie. That’s as much as I know.” Lexa said lowly, so Gracie wouldn’t hear.

 

“That’s okay,” Her mother said encouragingly. “We don’t have to talk about her right now.”

  
  
“Thank you.” Lexa nodded as her mother handed over two plates.

  
  
Lexa enjoyed having breakfast with her mother and daughter before taking Gracie to daycare and going to work.

 

* * *

 

 

Lexa couldn’t remember the last time she hung out with someone who wasn’t in her immediate circle of friends. Lexa had never hung out with someone who was a mother before and was actually looking forward to it.

  
  
As she finished up her clients leg tattoo, Lexa felt like her heart was in her stomach. She had no idea why she was so nervous. It wasn’t everyday she got invited to lunch by someone who wasn’t Anya.

 

Anya knew about it and teased her the entire time.

  
  
“Do I look okay?” Lexa asked once her client had left. “I need to get going if I want to make it to the lunch.”

  
  
“Lexa, you look fine. It’s just lunch. Stop stressing out about it.”

  
  
“I want them to like me.”

  
  
“I’m almost positive they will,” Anya smirked. “I mean have you seen yourself?”

  
  
“I meant personality wise, not sexually. I’m pretty sure they’ll all married.”

  
  
“That clearly doesn’t matter these days.” Anya shot back, referring to the situation with Clarke. Lexa sighed roughly, but didn’t comment.

  
  
Anya knew better than to invite herself. To be honest, Lexa was waiting for it to happen. Anya hadn’t said a word and wasn’t going to, because Lexa needed to do this for herself. Anya wouldn’t allow herself to be jealous because she thought it was a good thing that Lexa was going to lunch with people who actually understand what it was like to be a mother.

 

“Can you stop being so lame?” Anya asked with a smirk. “You need to leave so you can be back by three for your next client.”

 

“You’re right.” Lexa said, checking herself out once more. It was nothing from the usual. Just a flannel shirt buttoned up and a pair of black skinny jeans. Her hair was in a tight bun and she busied herself by tucking the loose strands behind her ears.

 

Anya silently walked up behind her and started pushing her towards the door. “Goodbye and good luck!”

  
  
“Good luck boss on having a social life!” Octavia waggled her fingers at her as she guided one of her clients to the back. Lexa sneered at her but didn’t say anything.

  
  
She waited by the door. Waiting for a sign that Anya was going to come with her, but Anya didn’t move from where she was by her office no matter how much she wanted to.

  
  
Anya waved at her and Lexa knew she needed to leave now.

 

Lexa didn’t allow herself to be nervous on the drive over there. She focused on navigating her ways through the back roads to avoid all the traffic on the highway.

 

The place was a bit far away, but Lexa was greeted with Emori standing outside waiting for her.

 

“Hey, I’m so glad you could make it!” Emori smiled as she brought Lexa in for a hug. Lexa wrapped an arm around her before looking around the restaurant.

 

“This place looks fancy.” Lexa commented as they walked inside, looking at all the modern artwork.

 

“They have the best steaks!” Emori bragged. “Come on. Come meet the girls.”

 

Lexa didn’t know why her heart was pounding. It really had been a long time since she’d hung around anyone that wasn’t Anya, Octavia and Lincoln. Lexa was excited, but she was looking forward to spending some time with people who would understand her struggles as a mother.

 

“This is Indra and Echo.” Emori introduced Lexa. Lexa smiled politely at them before stretching out her arm.

 

“Nice to meet you.” Lexa said to Indra first and then Echo.

 

“You didn’t tell me she was so hot.” Echo flashed Lexa a flirty smile and Lexa blushed.

 

“Yeah, you didn’t.” Indra said. The woman’s face was blank, a complete contrast to the statement she just made. Lexa’s cheeks were redder than the tomatoes displayed on the menu.

 

“Oh, guys stop before you make her pass out.” Emori said, gesturing for Lexa to sit beside her.

 

“It’s really nice to meet you. All Emori does is-“

 

“Echo, why don’t you be quiet?” Emori asked with a overly sweet smile.

 

“Honestly, she never shuts up about you.” Indra said from behind the menu. Her face was stoic, but she was wearing a teasing smile.

 

“Okay, now that, the embarrassing moment is over. Let’s look over the menu.” Emori slid the menu over for Lexa to look over.

 

The place was known for their steaks and honestly, Lexa was totally up for one right now.

 

They kept the conversation light until their food came out. Even if the table was silent, Lexa didn’t feel uncomfortable or out of place. They were all going out of their way to make Lexa feel included.

 

“Echo, don’t let me forget to get my wife something. She’ll kill me if I do. This is her favorite steak place.” Indra said casually, making Echo nod and smile.

 

“I won’t forget,” Echo nodded seriously. “One time Indra forgot to bring her wife home a steak and I seriously feared for her life, but then again, her wife was pregnant at the time.”

 

Lexa laughed at the story, but her smile was immediately wiped off at Echo’s next question.

 

“Are you married?” Echo asked curiously. Even Indra looked up from her food to see. “Do you have a wife or husband?”

 

Emori cleared her throat loudly, trying to get her friend’s attention, but it was solely on Lexa. Emori cleared her throat again as Lexa opened her mouth to speak.

 

“I did,” Lexa spoke gently. “She passed.”

 

Echo gasped and placed a hand over her heart. Even Indra was wearing a deep frown. Emori looked annoyed that her friends didn’t catch on to the fact that she was trying to get them to be quiet.

 

“I’m so sorry, Lexa,” Echo frowned. “I had no idea,” Echo squinted her eyes at Emori. “Emori didn’t-“

 

“It wasn’t my place to tell. I was trying to get you to shut your trap.” Emori butted in defensively.

 

“It’s okay.” Lexa quickly said. “It’s not something I just flat out say.”

 

“I can understand,” Indra said. “I can’t even imagine losing Sam.”

 

“Is that your wife?” Lexa asked with a small smile.

 

“It is.” Indra said back. “Again, I’m sorry for your loss.”

 

“I’m just trying to get through it day by day. My daughter helps, although she looks just like her.”

 

“I think I’ve seen your daughter when you drop her off. She’s a cutie.” Echo said with a bright smile to which Lexa smiled back at.

 

“She uses it to get her way.”

 

“Oh, tell me about it,” Indra groaned lightly. “And it’s even worse when it’s two against one and I’m completely outnumbered.”

 

The whole table laughed at that before quieting down.

 

“Was it recent?” Echo asked.

 

“Echo!” Emori scolded, but Lexa shook her head.

 

“It’s been a couple years. Her anniversary is coming up soon. It’s always hard around that time, especially when Gracie starts asking about her.”

 

“Major props to you,” Indra said seriously. “I can only imagine being in your shoes.”

 

“Thank you.” Lexa said humbly, taking another bite of her steak. She was nearly done with it. Emori was right, these steaks were really good.

 

The conversation stirred away from Lexa’s current situation to hobbies. She found out that Indra loved going rock climbing and they even set a date to go in the next couple of weeks together. Echo practically lived at the grocery store with having two kids and a husband who pretty much ate everything. Echo offered to go grocery shopping with her sometime after they got lunch together.

 

Lexa looked around the table and smiled. These women really were nice and Lexa was so glad she came out to lunch with them.

 

She was looking forward to spending more time with all of them.

* * *

 

The first thing Clarke did when she got home from work was take her heels off. She let out a small sigh of relief at her feet finally being free. She frowned as she remembered all the times she would come home and Finn offered to give her a foot rub.

  
  
The faint sound of her cell phone buzzing, brought Clarke back to reality. Finn wasn’t here and he would probably never come back. Why would he? And it wasn’t like Clarke wanted to see him. It was the last thing she wanted.

 

But still, Clarke couldn’t stop the ache in her heart, knowing she was ending something they both started together. Clarke couldn’t stop the ache in her heart at her mother calling her repeatedly. She’d purposely been calling her all day and she knew exactly what it was about.

 

There was a number of reasons why Clarke didn’t want to answer. For one, she just got home and the only thing she wanted to do was lay down. She had no idea what to even say to her mother. There was nothing to be said, so Clarke ignored her.

 

Clarke wasn’t ready to hear what her mother had to say, even though she knew exactly what it was. Her grandparents were very adamant on telling Clarke when they were coming to town, and Clarke knew it was around this time.

 

It had been a long week and all Clarke wanted to do was relax. She didn’t want to think about Finn or her relatives. She just wanted it all to stop. She didn’t want to think anymore about this stupid wedding that wasn’t going to happen.

 

Clarke looked around the family room. She didn’t know whether she wanted to sit down or clean some more. Clarke was almost positive that there was nothing else left to clean. She had cleaned every corner of this house in preparation of the girls coming by on Sunday.

  
  
Now, that thought made Clarke’s stomach swirl. She couldn’t believe that in a couple days, Lexa would be bringing her daughter over. Clarke made sure to put anything that was deemed dangerous or hazardous away so Gracie would be safe will she was here.

 

Clarke looked around, freaking out. She rearranged the stack of magazines on her coffee table.

 

Lexa didn’t really want to come over here, did she? Was she just saying yes to make her happy? Would Lexa really allow her daughter into her house? Were they even ready for that?

 

Clarke had no idea what rushed over her, but she ran to her phone. She needed to speak to Lexa. She just needed to hear her voice. There was so much going on in her life, and Lexa had a way of making it all go away.

 

Knowing that she wasn’t going to stop thinking about Lexa, Clarke finally grabbed her phone and dialed the one number that got her heart racing.

 

“Hey.” Clarke greeted casually, although her heart was soaring.

 

“Hi.” Lexa said back softly. “What’s up?”

 

“Oh nothing,” Clarke waved off. “I just wanted to hear your voice.”

 

“Well, that’s awfully sweet.” Clarke could tell by the tone of her voice, that Lexa was mocking her, but it made her smile nonetheless.

 

“I was actually calling to make sure you were still coming over on Sunday?” The long pause that accompanied the question, made Clarke’s stomach drop. She just knew something wasn’t right.

 

“About that…” Lexa trailed off dreadfully.

 

“It’s okay if you can’t make it,” Clarke rambled. “I’m sure you have-“

 

“My mom is in town.” Lexa said as more of a question, than a statement.

 

“She is?” Clarke frowned. She had no idea that Lexa’s mother was in town.

 

“She doesn’t really- I mean she doesn’t- but then Gracie and then she-“

 

“Lexa!” Clarke tried to cut off Lexa’s awkward rambling.

 

“I just don’t think now is a good time to spend the whole day over there,” Lexa explained after clearing her throat. “I think I should spend time with my mom and so should Gracie. I also just have no idea how to tell her so-“

 

“I get it,” Clarke said and she did, no matter how hurt she was at not being able to see Lexa and Gracie. “Spend time with her. I had no idea she was in town.”

 

“This week has been crazy and I just forgot to mention it.”

 

“It’s okay, Lexa. Really.” Clarke said as she tried to take a deep breath to calm herself down.

 

“Thanks for understand, Clarke and- wait! No, Gracie don’t touch that!” There was some rustling over the phone, probably Lexa rushing to Gracie’s side. Clarke sat down on the couch and waited patiently.

 

“Hey, I have to go.” Lexa rushed out, Clarke barely understood. The line went dead the next second and Clarke pulled the phone away, looking at it with a frown.

 

Her thoughts were interrupted by someone knocking heavily on the door. Clarke sighed loudly, hoping it wasn’t Raven. She couldn’t handle her right now. Not on top of Abby calling her all day and Lexa cancelling their plans.

 

Clarke reluctantly got off the couch, not having the energy to do anything at this point. Her body was slouched against the door as she opened it.

 

“Hey, Clarke.” His deep voice shook Clarke straight to the core. She gasped and straightened up her body, wondering why he was here. She didn’t say a word, she was too shocked to.

 

Watching the man she was going to marry, stand on the other side of a house she once called theirs, was too much for Clarke to handle.

 

Watching the man she was going to marry, dressed in a suit and tie, groomed like he was going to a fancy meeting, made Clarke’s heart hurt.

 

She wasn’t ready for this. She wasn’t ready to come face to face with the one person who knew her best. (She also wasn’t ready to say goodbye).

 

Clarke had a feeling no matter what happened after this, this was the moment in her life where she needed to say goodbye.

 

She didn’t care about her mother saying the wedding was still happening. She knew what she needed to do. She knew she had to do this and by the look on Finn’s face, he knew too.

 

It was time to move on and stop running from the past.

 

It was time to find solace in the future and it started right here.

 

It started with her finally talking to Finn.

 

“We have a lot to talk about.”


End file.
